Facebook Opener (Day, Bar, Social Game)

Ok so I have been pressured at many bootcamps to get my ass on here and share some of the stuff we are using infield. Now I get AA on these forums as I know how long it takes me to right stuff. So am going to practise with short and sweet little tit bits throughout February (my birthday month;-) that you can begin using as they have been field tested to the hilt.

this opener (1 of 3 to do with Facebook) actually was field tested in Starbucks, West Hollywood when I was out visiting Mystery and the gang. Now guys if like me you are from the Uk and not used to seeing super hot women, man this starbucks had more hotties than I see in a month in Nottingham, UK lol. But this Starbucks is special as it was right over the road from Vivid Porn Studios and it just seemed to be a haven for hotties.

So there is me beavering a way on my laptop, while being constantly distracted (God I was like a dog with 2 dicks and a street full of lamp posts!)… So anyway I was working on some new Day Game openers and stuff I could use in normal social settings and kept having a browse at my facebook, pondering on whether or not to remove my then recently ex'd girlfriend – well we had split up after 9 months (this was during the end of my 1st year in the game) – I had, had to feel the pain, knowing she would move on and as a hotty would get all the attention in the world and I would have to get out of my comfort phase and get my sarging head back on.

I was trying to move on quickly, but kept getting shitty messages about me and the women in photos I was getting tagged with (IOI? I don't know, felt more like bitterness to me) but it was causing problems with the friendship I really wanted us to retain. I had found strength to move with some great advice from my friend James Matador…. And my dilemma was….. whether or not to remove her from my facebook and all the back lash it would create.

so what the hell, I typed it out there and then in Starbucks W. Hollywood and to get me out of the headspace of where and when to run it, I agreed with myself, the minute I stop writing it, I will run it on the first 8+ that walks by.

10 minutes later, finished, a girl that a year ago I would have considered way out of my league walked by with a vibrancy in her step and a smile that said I am something special (the ones we tend to shy away from .

Here is what happened on that day in its raw format:

——————————————————–
Me: "Hey, let me get your thoughts on something real quick."
[i didnt wait for her to respond]

Me: "How long, if at all, should you wait before removing an ex from your facebook?"

HB: "Well how long have you been split up?"

Me: "Well only a month, but I'm out here and she's touring and I keep getting all these questions about what am up to because she has seen me tagged in various photos while I've been out here."

HB: [slings her bag off her shoulder and sits down] (I like forwardness of American girls) "ooo this is an interesting one"

Me: "Grab a seat why don't you" [neg with playful attitude]

Me: "So anyway, I always used to tell her that if I were away doing shows [open loop] and she ever felt uncomfortable about any pictures she saw me tagged in, not to keep it inside and be frustrated, but ask me and I'd be happy to fill her in on what was going on"

HB: "Oh that's nice of you" [I never caught onto the IOIs until later reflection, which is normal when you are running new material as you are too focussed on getting it out to practise - and that's why you shouldnt be changing your material every week to find the next best opener!]

Me: "woah there, slow this down, by me a coffee before you hit on me like that" [cute laugh in return to neg 2]

Me: You know I felt for her…. a. she was in less of a position now to ask the questions and b. I didnt have the opportunity to re-assure her – so she was kind of like getting a double emotional wammy…. and all because some women dragged me into a harmless photo at a friends party [pre-selection].

HB: mmm she ponders

Me: "well right or wrong I just told her, look…. you're not going to like it, but we are both going to be meeting new friends and getting back to growing our social garden and I dont want you feeling niggled every weekend when you look on my facebook, so am taking you off for a month or so, so we can both relax and not feel judged".

HB: "Yeah that's fair – So what you doing in Hollywood?" [IOI]

————————————————————–

Now just so you know how it all went, she invited me and a friend to a house party in the hills (after a bit of text game later the next day) which I went to with Matador and the host (a Director of some old Movie that I had never seen, but Matador had) really liked us, which in turn added to our value with her. She turns out to be one of the Playboy Golf models (not the Mansion types, but more the everyday pretty types Playboy uses for corporate events) – and has loads of contacts – now I was only there a couple of days, so rather than play and run, I decided (friend zone I hear you shout ) to put her into my non FClosed cool GFs – who has since hooked me up with no end of parties and her friends in Hollywood and LA…. ahh good times, as I stare out my apartment window at the rain of Nottingham .

so in summary:…………

1. Hey, let me get your thoughts

2. How long, if at all should you wait before taking an ex of your facebook

3. let her speak for a moment then cut in

4. FTC – well what I said to her was xxxxx

Nice and simple!

Yeah I know… and in the day time (more so as she sat down indicating she did have time too) or social settings I like to extend the openers as to also demonstrate value with embedded DHVS.

I like this opener as its about relationships, dilema, facebook (I call it Fakebook for laughs) which is all current, your touring GF of value, the fact that she is still chasing you somewhat, that you have your social life going on, and some open loops for further conversation. All in all – solid 'chick crack'!
Definitely in this original format was suited to more calmer environments for delivery.

Try it out and let me know how you get on – lets see if we can get 50 guys to try it out – once 10 of you do, I will share the other 2 versions that I have created since then about Facebook.

There! I told you I get sucked in and takes me ages to type out!!! Hope you got some benefit

ps. any opinion opener I use, is taken from my real life, which is kind of a personal rule of mine in the game.

About Discovery

Discovery is the VA Program Director & Head of UK Training operating out of England. An inspiring International Speaker, he is a leading Personality Profiling Trainer and Sales Guru and has been awarded the prestigious ‘Insights Trainer of the Year’ award against 180+ nominees for 3 years running.

Classic Question and Answer with Mystery Part 1

Q+A with Mystery: Fall 1998

AFC: I was extremely nervous during the 50 day experiment. Even more nervous than I expected to be. I don’t doubt that it showed, at least a little.

Mystery: Then just keep doing this till you PERFECT this. If you can get this right, timing and smile and confidence and playfulness and on and on, then you can move onto other scripts. All the other scripts are just as unassuming sexually speaking as the Elvis one. If you are going to use a script INTRO thing, then tell us first so we know you aren’t fucking up with bad intros like complements or sexual innuendo intros.

AFC: I don’t understand what you mean here. How do I manifest ‘being into myself’ when using the Elvis script?

Mystery: hold a magazine and sorta be reading it as you perform the script. Now remove the mag and there you are. Sorta thinking about this Elvis thing and talking aloud to someone. Outgoing people do this BTW.

AFC: That was my first instinct, but I guess I didn’t stick with it for very long. As he was on his way out of the store and glaring at me with daggers in his eyes, I smiled and gave him a friendly wave. His reaction was to become even angrier.

Mystery: Your getting angry was (nothing personal here) the most pathetic ego driven behavioral non thinking thing you could have done. It was unsophisticated, immature, stupid, lame and un-intellectual. The way to win in this life is no longer by strength. It’s by the brain. Don’t REACT to people. PRO-ACT. Think and win. EVERY SOCIAL interaction requires gambits and strategies like in CHESS. Consider learning chess. You will obtain many insights for girl getting.

AFC: I wasn’t especially creative, but I was honest and polite. It was only later than I responded with the same kind of disrespect that he had shown to me. Perhaps I should just have let him walk away.

Mystery: You didn’t recognize HIS feelings. You didn’t have compassion for HIM. You didn’t attempt to connect to the fact that you are both guys and her COULDA been a buddy if this didn’t occur. Bull shit baffles brains and by just misdirecting their attention with bullshit talk (fake facial tics or make random guttural noises). It’s FUN to fuck with people this way if they behave incorrectly. Don’t give them the same talk back, go one step ahead … think CHESS.

AFC: I imagine if I had thrown myself on the floor and started bawling like an infant, he would simply have walked away, thinking he had ‘won.’

Mystery: And then you yell, ‘Nooooooo, don’t …. GOOOOO!!!!’ You are so fucked up man. WINNER. Who’s the winner – he got the girl fucker. Of course he’s the winner. Nothing you can do can make you the winner when HE has the girl.

AFC: I’m not sure anybody would have recognized it as a joke. What does that gain me?

Mystery: Not the girl, so then what you COULD have gained. You aren’t exactly thinking as a player or pick up artist. You could have done this so over dramatically that it would throw him greatly.

AFC: Maybe it’s different at the clubs that you’re familiar with, but at the ’18 and up’ type clubs that I can get into, I just can’t imagine going to a club by myself. I mean, I would just feel absolutely humiliated.

Mystery: And you don’t feel humiliated by our knowing you don’t have the sex appeal enough to have a girlfriend? Does that not … humiliate … you? Alright, so you go alone. You don’t have to TELL anyone. Just say your friend is in here somewhere. Later, you can say you got ditched or something. Your friend went home with a girl.
Easy.

AFC: Everyone would be looking at me like, ‘Why are you here by yourself?’, because everyone, I mean everyone, goes to these clubs with friends.

Mystery: I WORK in clubs dude. This is Bull Shit. Go alone. You can lie. Make friends.

AFC: Is this not the feeling you get when you go to a 21 and over club by yourself? How you deal with this? Since I’m not much of a dancer, I know that I would just feel too awkward about the whole situation, I’d spend maybe 5/10/15 minutes sort of standing by myself trying to look ‘cool’, and then it would get to me and I’d leave.

Mystery: Go alone. Don’t dance. MEET. Go from group to group in there talking to people. Make friends of everyone. Be fun. How can a girl be interested in you if you aren’t INTERESTING in the first place dude. Don’t stand there with a beer you your limp wristed hand. Don’t try to ‘look’ cool. Be cool by chatting with EVERYONE. When I can’t get a friend to go with me (Like yesterday by good buddy Tal bailed out on going downtown with me) I go out alone. I went out alone yesterday. That’s right. Am I humiliated? Well let’s see … I got two girls #s. How many did YOU get?!! Ok, that’s said and done.

Ah fuck who I am talking to away – If you are so insecure about being alone, you will not have the guts to actually approach girls anyway. Stay home.

AFC: There’s something about having friends wit you that allows you to convey the impression that you’re not needy even if/when you get rejected.

Mystery: Girls want guys who are confident enough to go ABOVE this whole thing. In fact, I even TOLD them I came down alone when my buddy bailed on me. And I had a fucking BLAST. I made two new guy buds and got 2 girls #s. OH, AND I met about 10 chicks that night and chatted with them and I even got a drink bought for me. So there. All alone I went. How humiliating.

Classic FR: World Top Playboy Playoff Challenge Spring 2005

Naw, I’d really like have a competition for real. In fact last night Style and I had a little contest. He bet me a dollar that I couldn’t make out with the first set I opened. I wanted to do the 5 set challenge but I was holding a boot camp and it’s day one so I can’t take more than 25 minutes per set because I have to show them how to cold approach.

Here’s what happened: in total I did like 7 sets. All opened very nicely (not a single blow out) and I was in set with each anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes. I went into isolation and kino escalation (hand holding and embracing) in all of them except one (but she had to take a photo with me and held me tight for it shrug – I came in negging too hard I surmise though if it wasn’t a boot camp I could have worked more as I easily had maneuverability by then). One of them (a 2set) a student of mine and I bounced at the end of the night … I made out with one (and rubbed her down there). So overall, since every set opened and ran very well, I’d say this is promising for a competition. It’s amazing to be able to open a set and KNOW you can go as far as you want with it and the full monty if YOUR CHOICE. The hardest part really is getting it to OPEN and build enough ATTRACTION for solid kino escalation (where they comply to your wishes to be touched). Once you have that (3 to 5 minutes in) the only way to lose is to fuck up. Just don’t do anything to compromise the attraction you built and you can just baby sit in comfort (with entertaining kino escalation) all the way to full monty, based not on time but on her comfort with each step in kino.

Now the logistics of many of them may compromise a WIN because one of the sets which blew open (we were embracing and it was very on) was – we concluded…

She and her other hot friend (Style was in with and later we pushed a student in) may have been on coke or something. She kept cutting off my threads every 3 seconds like a speed freak though I got into kino with her and could easily have continued students agreed she was acting very jittery and that’s not my interest. you never know what you’re gonna get til you enter and maneuver within the set.

Anyways, as for the first set: I went into a 2set. Tall, cute girl. Worked her for 30 minutes. Holding her, hand holding, cuddling, picture taking, and overall a great response … though the obstacle (who later bought me a drink)

Was socially retarded and reminded me of the jumping bouncy yapper dogs in old bugs bunny cartoons. So I did a take-away for a bit (locked her in with props of course) and did my boot camp. Later I waved at her and she waved me over with a big smile. I came over and some guy without a neck was pissed and started to yell at her. I never talked to him before but it appeared a jealousy plotline with an ex was developed. As her retarded friend was buying me the drink the guy said, “If you know what’s good for you you’d walk away.” I immediately went to the bouncers and bounced him the fuck out of there. I WIN.

BUT: while the retard stayed and I got my drink, the target, in a yelling fight with the guy, went outside with him to continue the argument. Oops. I owe $1 to Style for not making out with her. As you can see, with yappy and ex-con as my obstacles, I would have had to have isolated to outside the club and into the casino (as I said I would have done if it weren’t for it being a boot camp where I can’t do that) before any of this happened. So … Am I ready? You bet!

Mystery

PS: boot camp day 2 begins in less than 1.5 hours. I could have gotten a hotel last night and full montied the girl (I said to her, “you’d spread your legs for me tonight if I could stay wouldn’t you” and I rubbed her. She said, “Yea I would.” So that was a win enough because it was 4am, I had a boot camp to go to the next day and my GF was in my bed at home who is hotter. I was only demoing the MM skill set anyways. I don’t want to have to pay for a hotel (as she was sharing a room with her friend) just to have sex with a girl of lesser value than what I already have waiting for me. Shrug QUALITY PROBLEM huh.

Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop & Discovery Review by Dyyz

This should have been titled “All Instructors in LA Bootcamp.” Everyone was there except Hawaii that I have read about either from reviews or the forums. I mean, Kosmo and Joe D. from Season 1 of the Pickup Artist and Simeon, Greg and Brian from Season 2 were all there to help out, both in the classroom setting, as well as in-field. There was something to be learned from each and every one of them, and they are all very good.

The Classroom:

In the classroom settings you get two sessions with each instructor, Mystery, Matador, and Lovedrop; one one each day. The guys always run over the alloted time but that’s just because they have so much to teach and there isn’t nearly enough time for it all. At one point Mystery asked one of the other guys “are we making a schedule or running a bootcamp?” They want to make sure that they can instill every piece of knowledge possible in the time they have. I will do my best to touch on the ideas without saying too much, you have to see these guys explain it. It’s the difference from reading it to seeing it done.

Mystery’s classroom sessions included an indepth overview of the process and then an expanded session on the qualification step of the method. Mystery has so much information in his head that he cannot stop teaching. His teachings are thorough and very easy follow. He teaches the basic method that most everyone out there uses as the foundation for other methods or styles. Which is not entirely basic but it is easiest for an AFC to follow.

Lovedrop’s classroom experience is interesting as well because he openly admits that he knows he has to take most of the people in the classroom out that very same night and he teaches what will have the biggest impact on the students the quickest. That’s not to say that he isn’t thorough, it’s just that through experience, he’s learned what has the fastest results from the classroom to the in-field experience. I have also read where people are comming down on Lovedrop because he says “Mystery would say…” that’s because the process is so internalized for all of the instructors that in order to teach it, they have to actively think about what they do and what is the best way to teach it. As as I just said, the “basic” method that Mystery teaches is the one that gets the best results from the students the quickest. Lovedrop covers the inner game as well as kino escalation. The biggest thing I took away from his sessions is the ability to help control approach anxiety.

Matador’s classroom time was entirely different. He explains early on that he uses a different process than the other guys. He also explains that he goes through all of the method’s steps from A1 to C1 in a matter of seconds. It’s just all in how he calibrates and executes. His biggest topic is attraction. The so-called Matador Mayhem is based around sexual tension and is amazing. This guy has a way of breaking down what he does and how it works so that even an AFC could at least, attempt to do what he does.

Discovery dosn’t spend too much time with the students in the classroom. He is the one who debriefs with the students and he help fine tune what he saw in-field. He has a charisma about he that he passes on to the students in the delivery of the material. I wish we had more time with this guy, because he has a lot to offer the community.

The Pickup Artist guys all came in and joined us when it was time to breakup into smaller groups to practice the material and delivery. They are exponentially better than they were even at the end of the TV show. They help you with the details, from body language to vocal tonality and they can help out a lot because they have all been where all of us were before.

All of these guys have a way of explaining and breaking down things so that you not only know what to do, but know why it works so that you can apply it to yourself and your avatar and lifestyle. These guys tell you that the canned material they give you should only be used about 6 weeks then you should be able to come up with your own material. This is why the way that they teach is so effective.

In-Field:

I’m not sure I can explain the in-field experience better than anyone else, so I’ll just give a quick recap of what I experienced. First off, the first night they got us into the VIP room of the hottest club in LA. Now this was no easy task, there were over 20 guys and maybe 4 women in the group, so they pulled some strings to make that happen,a nd it was worth it. There were celebrities, reality TV personalities and prettymuch, you had to be somebody to be there, and we got to practice in that atmosphere. MikeyVegas was dead on when he said we owned the club, and that every guy wanted to be us and every girl wanted to be with us.

Mystery was working his game and it was amazing to watch. The instructors told us that is we see them do something and want to know how they did it, to go up to them and just ask and they will reverse engineer it for us, because just about everything they do is internallized and so it is an unconsious process most of the time for them.

Matador was amazing. He would grab some strange, beautiful girl and simply say, “Here let me introduce you to my friend,” to the girl then pass her off on to the students. Set open. Now don’t get me wrong, it didn’t always work with every girl but I was still in awe of what could be done with practice.
Lovedrop has a style his own in the club. There’s not a funnier guy to watch. He was just himself, but by being himself he demonstrated qualities that women respond to. And he teaches the students how to do the same. He helped me out several times, one especially where I got in my own headspace, he helped me get back to normal and begin opening sets again.

The pivots are phenominal. It’s hard not to look good when Kacey and Erica and the other girls are there with you. They have been doing this for a long time and know exactly when to DHV you and when you whisper in your ear infront of your set. They can do it all. When I wasn’t in set, I went back to find one of the pivots to get my head straight and they would help me open a set. I can’t say enough about the girls.
The Pickup Artist guys were also out there to help out. I’ll be honest, Kosmo is the man. He would drag me into set after set and he was amazing. It was great to hear some of the same lines that I had just learned, used by him and see that they work and what reaction you will get with them. Greg, from season 2 was also an all-star in-field. He seemed to always know just when to join me in a 2 set to help me isolate, and he knew just how to do it also. I spent a little time with all of the guys, but Kosmo and Greg were the two that really took me under their wing.

I hate to admit but I didn’t see Discovery too much in-field. I would have liked to have seen him at work a bit more. What I did see looked amazing, he was always in set and seemed to always isolate quickly. When I did speak to him, he was very good about fine tuning what he had seen me do. So he was paying attention to me and saw me more than I saw him, because he was always spot on with the advice.

Like I said much earlier in this review. Mystery never stops teaching. On our way out of the clubs, he was breaking down a set he worked, or a set he saw us in, or what we can do next time to make a set work for us. He is a machine. A fountain of knowledge, and all you have to do is listen and pay attention and he will teach you.

Breakout Sessions:

This will be a quick one. The breakout sessions are like Grad school for college. I attended all of them and they fine tune what you ahve spent the pervious two days learning. It’s like specializing in each field. Each instructor has an area where they excell and this is the time for them to teach you how and why.
Matador said it best at the end of the bootcamp. “I’ve taught you everything I know. Now it’s your turn to go out there and apply it and make it yours.”

This was an experience that I will never forget and learned an immense amount from. I can garuntee that I will be practicing what they have taught us and will utilize it in all aspects of my life, not just for picking up women. I know this was a lengthy review and if you’ve read it this far, I thank you. Again, like MikeyVegas, I did this review as much for myself as I did for the readers. I built a bond with the other guys in the camp as well as the instructors. And I know this may be too detailed a post, so if it need be ammended by an administrator, then please feel free. I got my thought out and thats a huge step towards internalizing the material. Thanks everyone for everything, and if you were there, please let me know if this is similar to your experience, or different, because I want to know everything I missed.

Phone Game Part 6: If You Don’t Get Her On The Phone

This is part six of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

If you’ve messed up somewhere in your game (or sometimes even if you’ve run perfect game and there are other factors in her life that are interfering with things), it can sometimes be very hard to get your girl on the phone for the first couple of calls. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

I’ve seen a lot of talk in the past about never leaving a message and just calling back a little later. Some older community teachings also advocate using a blocked number or, if you think she’s screening your calls, calling her from another number/payphone/etc. I disagree with all of this because, personally, I think it’s really creepy.

Leaving A Voicemail

The way you leave a voicemail can sometimes make or break a set.

I personally like Mehow’s idea of leaving a message but keeping it short and sweet:

“Hey, it’s Kevin. You can call me back.”
“Hey, it’s Kevin. We’ll talk later.”

Keep it friendly and warm, but simple and clear. DON’T do this:

“Hey this is Brian, we met at ____. I was wearing that hat that you said made me look like Kid Rock. I really liked talking to you and wanted to see if we could get together sometime. Maybe I could buy you dinner? Call me back: my number is 555-1AFC. Again, that’s 555-1AFC. Hope to hear from you soon. Talk to you later. It’s Brian, by the way. Ok. Call me! Bye!”

That will NOT get you a date!

Assume she knows who you are (and she SHOULD if you built enough comfort before you got her number) and assume that she will call you back. If that’s your reality, and it’s compelling enough, it will happen.

If She Doesn’t Respond

If she does not respond to your texts or answer your calls, DO NOT keep texting or calling her. One of the creepiest things you can do when gaming your target is to continuously call or text her. Don’t even bother blocking your number either. If she’s already screening her calls, she will figure out pretty quickly that it’s just you calling from a blocked number, from a payphone, etc. Call her from your phone with your number once and leave a message.

I will rarely make a second call the same day if she doesn’t answer her phone or phone back. Same goes for texts: if she doesn’t respond to my first text of the day, I probably wont text her again that day unless I hear from her somehow. Also, because I usually only make one phone call until I hear from her, I will only ever leave one voicemail per day. If you’ve sent her a text and a phone call already that day and she still hasn’t talked to you, anything further than that can come off weird and stalkerish. Leave a voicemail on your first call of the day and then wait for her.

Anything more than this can be creepy and a MASSIVE turn-off.

Also, over the years I’ve seen a lot of guys (myself included, sadly) resend a previously sent text “just in case she didn’t get it”, thinking that even if she did get the first one, she will just assume the repeated text is just a duplicate (people texting from or to people in bad signal areas will sometimes get duplicate texts over and over again with some service providers). Unfortunately, most women know that you’re really just sending her the same message (emotionally needy girls do this A LOT), so do not do that either. You’re not being clever, you’re just doing what every other AFC does. If your phone says the text went through, assume that it went through. If she wanted to talk to you, she would text you back.

Again, I repeat:

DO NOT BE THAT CREEPY GUY THAT KEEPS CALLING, TEXTING, OR LEAVING MESSAGES. It astounds me how many men will fill a woman’s voicemail or send them dozens (that’s dozens PLURAL!) of texts per day if the woman doesn’t call them back. A woman doesn’t want a guy who is going to constantly hound her if she doesn’t contact him. She doesn’t want a guy who is going to “chase” her so much that it borders on stalking. She wants a guy that floats well below her comfort limits and lets her chase HIM.

If you don’t get her on the phone the first time you call her, wait a couple of days and repeat the pattern outlined in the previous posts. If you don’t hear from her again, wait a slightly longer amount of time and then try again. If you haven’t gotten a hold of her after two or three calls (maybe four, but sometimes that can be pushing it), it’s time to call it quits and go back to square one. But before giving up on the set entirely, you can try the Last Ditch Phone Message.

The Last-Ditch Phone Message

The Last Ditch Phone Message (I’m pretty sure I got this from Mystery, but I could be wrong) should be the last voicemail you leave for her if you haven’t been able to get her on the phone. You give her one last opportunity to take a chance and actually get to know you. It should go like this (I basically say the lines below verbatim):

Hey, it’s [Prophet]. You know what, let's just barrel through this. I know it's uncomfortable to meet new people. But let's just, you know, barrel through because this is important. This is how all our loved ones got into our lives, all the people we love and all our friends. Let's just get through the initial weirdness of meeting someone new and if we don't end up liking each other, at least we know we tried. So let's hang out. Ten minutes. Call me back.

Note that this is the Last Ditch Phone Message. If the girl hasn’t called you back so far, there is still a good chance she still wont, but this kind of call to action can sometimes save an otherwise failing set. Once gain, don’t sound creepy when you leave this message. Avoid sounding angry our disappointed, just be confident and upbeat. If you convey the right energy along with that message, it can turn things around from time to time.

DO NOT, I REPEAT: DO NOT sound pissed off that she hasn’t called you back. You should never sound upset that she hasn’t called. If she even detects that you are reacting to her lack of response on an emotional level she will unconsciously conclude that you are over-reactive and needy, and DEFINITELY wont call you then.

Next week: my final notes on Phone Etiquette.

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

Classic Writings: Evolution Phase Shift Routine by Style

Evolution Phase Shift Routine by Style

1. I tell her that she smells good and ask what she is wearing. Then I lean in, brush her hair aside, and sniff her slowly, moving up from the shoulder to the ear. “Mmmm, that smells good. People don’t pay enough attention to smell. But you’ll notice how animals, before they mate, will always smell each other. Evolution has hard-wired us to respond to certain things. You are wired to respond when someone smells you.”

2. “It’s like when someone pulls the back of your hair. You’ll notice how lions, when they mate, always bite and tug at the end of each other’s mane, right here.” (Since I’m shaved bald, I’ll add here, “This is what I miss the most about not having hair”; if you have hair, say, “This is one of my favorite things”.) Then I run my hand up the back of her neck and grab a fistful of hair at the roots and pull it, downwards. She says “Mmmm…” And I say “see.”

3. Then I talk about how “No one knows this, but the most sensitive places on the body are places that are usually hidden from contact with the air, like the back of the elbow (touching it) and knee (touching it). Any place where your body bends, twists, or folds, there are millions of sensitive little nerve endings that release endorphins. Then I take her arm, bend it a little, and erotically bite the area on the opposite side of the elbow (that crease where it bends). She usually gets the chills, and I have her ratify how good it feels.
[Note for the less experienced: If you don't know how to erotically bite a girl, learn before you do this. You want to take a big chunk of skin -- not a little pinch! – and slowly and firmly slide your teeth together until they meet and release the skin. You may want to practice on your own elbow first.]

4. After, I say, “But do you know what the best thing in the world is?…A bite…right…here.” And I point to the side of my neck. (Every now and then, I’ll add, that “this has to do with the fact that it is where the jugular vein is most exposed, and since most sexual fantasies have to do with submission and vulnerability, it sends all the fantasy signals flying.”) Then I’ll expose my neck and say, “Bite me right here” as if I expect her to do it. Fifty percent of the time she will. If she doesn’t, I just turn away calmly (punish), wait a few seconds, and then turn back and repeat, “Bite me right here.” Usually she will.

5. Half the time, her bite is lame. If so, I correct her and say, “That’s not how you bite. Come here.” Then I give her a good bite on the neck and instruct her to “try again.” This time, she ALWAYS does a great job.

6. Now you look her in the eye, smile mischievously/approvingly, and say, very slowly, “not bad.” Then glance down at her mouth, back up at her eyes, and…yes…finally…you…may…if you want…and if she’s ready…um…kiss!

Short Version: smell, grab hair, touch elbow, touch back of knee, bite elbow, bite my neck, bite her neck, triangular gazing, kiss.

Matador Interviewed at brobible.com

In 2007, when the “The Pick-Up Artist” premiered on VH1, the world met James Matador, the faithful wingman of the show’s host, Mystery. The Matador is a master pickup artist, a co-author of the book “Revelation,” and one of the founding partners of the the Venusian Arts, for which he leads seminars and boot camps throughout the world on the art of seduction. A computer science graduate of Depaul University and former national-champion martial artist, Matador is also an actor, an entrepreneur, and amateur bodybuilder. According to his official bio, he is most known for his “Matador Mayhem” technique, “a process in which he allows himself to be chased by multiple women simultaneously by hugging, kissing, and making out with many women at the same time, causing all the women involved to feel jealous of one another and compete for his attention.”

So when BroBible met the Matador at Marquee in New York a while back, we asked if he’d be up for an interview. He was down, so after a few months of telephone and email tag, we finally caught up with him recently for an hour-long interview that we present today and tomorrow in two parts. We learned right off the bat that although a third season of “The Pick-Up Artist” is not in the cards, a different show with a new angle is indeed in the works. The Matador didn’t want to reveal too many details just yet, but we got him to open up about plenty more.

BroBible: Our readers are big fans of you and Mystery and the rest of the “PUA” crew, and are always curious about what kind of trouble you guys are getting yourselves into. Any recent epic or funny stories that you can share?

James Matador: Sure, I was just taking a flight from Las Vegas to L.A., and I met a girl on the plane, and we started talking and one thing led to another and we ended up fooling around on the plane. And then we ended up fooling around in between when we got off the plane and got to the baggage claim, and to my dismay at baggage claim, she’s like, “O.K., we have to stop,” and I said “Why?” And she said, “Because my boyfriend is picking me up and I don’t want him to see.” I was kind of shocked, because this was something that she failed to mention to me. It’s not my greatest adventure, but it’s definitely a funny one that comes to the mind immediately.

It’s hard to imagine you not slaying every time you go out, but do you have any really embarrassing stories?

When I was just starting off and practicing, and I remember I was testing the whole cocky-funny paradigm, and going out and trying to be cocky-funny, or trying to do cocky-funny repeatings or gambits, as we call it. So one thing that came to mind, at the time — and I see the inappropriateness of it now — but at the time I though it would be cocky and funny to go up to a girl and playfully pat her on the behind as the opener. Well, hey, I thought it was funny, cocky-funny, what’s the problem, right? Slap in the face, getting thrown out of a couple clubs. I quickly figured out that that’s not working. Those were not one of my finer moments.

A lot of our users, when they fall in love, they fall hard. And if their girl cheats on them, or they have a bad breakup, they don’t know how to get themselves back in the game. Do you have any advice for them?

When you fall hard and you have a bad breakup, the world it seems like is coming down on you. And I think that a lot of times you’re going to think, “This is only happening to me, the universe is collapsing on me.” Well guess what, this is exactly how everybody who has a breakup feels. Your body, your emotions are ubiquitous, and we all operate pretty much the same way, with some anomalies. And I think that, first of all, there are girls that I see and girls that I ended up having strong feelings for, and there comes a time when it has to end sometime. And yes, I do go through that feeling of loss, that feeling of sadness, but it’s a state of mind, and it’s how you want to look at it. You can either look at it as a door closing permanently forever, or you can look at it as a door opening and the sun shining through and beyond that door lay all these new adventures, and new beautiful women that you’re going to meet. And new good times to be had. For me, it gives me a sense of optimism to get off my ass or stop smoking cigarettes and wallowing. It’s almost this very normal and understandable feeling of sadness and get out and do something proactive and start creating some happy moments again and start being positive again. And it is tough and it’s kind of like quitting smoking. It’s not to meant to feel good, and it’s O.K. to feel bad but it’s pretty much what kind of man you want to be. Do you want sit there for weeks upon weeks upon weeks or do you want to get up and do something and change the current situation that you’re in? And it’s going to take some discipline and it’s going to take overriding what your emotions are telling you but I guarantee it’s the best course of action. I’m not saying it’s easy, it’s something that has to be done. But I would say that it’s just one out of many instances in life — let’s say something happens to your business where you take a big hit that year. Are you going to run, are you going to hide, you gonna wallow in self-pity or are you going to use all of your resources, whatever they may be, to get up and fucking recover? That’s the way to look at it. You have to fucking recover. And know this: most of the time, when you do go out and you do meet a new girl who makes you happy, who you’re spending time with, most of the time the moment that happens, you immediately ameliorate all the negative emotions you had previously. And I’m not saying jump into another relationship, by the way, but it is healthy to start dating again, to start spending time with other women right away.

And this is no disrespect to women, but I think we live in a culture where love, so many notions of love have been mystified and it’s this mystical thing where we’re not supposed to understand it, that it just happens. But most of the time that when you have a lot of options in your life, two things happen: you start demanding better for yourself, you start realizing that a lot of these girls that you were going out with weren’t as special as you thought they were. Meaning they’re negative personalities, or unacceptable behavior, and I’m not saying all women are like this, I’m just saying that sometimes you need peace in the home and she just won’t stop nagging you. And you overlook it in the name of love. And when you start dating other women, you’re like, “Holy shit, I was pretty understanding, and this was why I had to break up with her because she wouldn’t stop fucking nagging me.” And you’re able to call women out on the stuff that is really not cool, and not O.K. But when you’re afraid that you’re not going to be able to get another girlfriend quickly or the next relationship’s going to come in a year from now, you get that feeling of, O.K., man, do I leave this vessel that I’m on right now? Do I leave what I have right now? I don’t know what’s going to happen. That can be a scary moment. I think the man who has options is in a position to make the most purest choice. Which is more pure: Being there because you want to be there or being there because you don’t have any other places to go?

What’s the best way to leave the girl the next morning and not be a total asshole? How can you do it with some class?

I guess what you’re saying is how to prevent resentful feelings and anger feelings in a relationship. Let’s look at what this is caused by. Anger is caused by a letdown in expectations. What are expectations caused by? Expectations are caused by telling people false statements or allowing them to believe things that aren’t true. So let me say this, that as a good pickup artist, you’re gonna be willing to lose the girl in order to get the girl. And if you have any egotistical thoughts in your head that I can pick up any woman, that’s not a healthy thing to do because it limits you and quite frankly it’s not fucking true and quite frankly you wouldn’t want to. So my point is this: When your skills are at a certain level, you can start screening for the type of women that you want in your life. So what are the type of women that I want in my life? Well as of right at this moment, well, yeah, I want to hang out with women who are beautiful, who have a good personality, who aren’t so emotionally hollow to where they need to latch onto the first guy that they see and their whole life revolves around me after that. And I am very upfront that I am seeing other people, that I do enjoy your company but don’t start asking me where am I going all the time? It’s not appropriate for you asking me those questions — who am I spending time with? Basically, lay down the expectations, the parameters of the relationship up front and center. What happens is people dodge these or aren’t capable of confronting those issues right off the front, so the other person is led to believe other things, aka, having expectations that aren’t accurate. And that’s when you get these really angry, rageful type feelings for the other person, where they call you an asshole and they start bad-mouthing you to your friends, but make no mistake, I never make statements or expectations, like I never say “I’m going to marry you,” “This is going to last forever,” if I don’t mean them, that is. “I’m not seeing anyone else.” I don’t bring these things up necessarily, but I never — I’m not a perfect person and I never claim to be — but to the best of my ability, I never try to be disingenuous in that way, does that make sense?

Totally. That’s the best way, that way they’re not going around bad-mouthing you and you can have fun with them.

It’s not only that. Fear of retaliation, that’s one motivator, but just in general you can still be, if you work on your way of being — and it’s also in our book, “Revelation” — and you understand what you want your personality, your lifestyle, and your identity to look like, you can still weave in characterstics in such a way that you do not have to be an untruthful person. We all tell little white lies when girls ask, “Does this dress make me look fat?” We withhold information at points to protect her feelings but at the same time I do believe you can be a pick-up artist and be a good guy and be an ethical person. There’s nothing unethical that happens naturally.

Another one, this is something that plagues a lot of guys now, the question of text messaging. How long should you wait? Is it a pussy move? What are your thoughts on text messaging?

There’s a whole school of thought on text messaging. I do think that when you are waiting to the point where you’ve already met and separated, now you’re trying to play the game going forward via text messaging, I think most of that work should have been done earlier. I’m not a text-messaging expert. Basically, here’s how all my text messages go. By the time it gets to the phone call or the text message, the girl and I really like each other and it’s a normal part of the process. The text message or the phone call isn’t scary because I’m going to know ahead of time whether it’s a flaky number or it’s a number I got because just for getting for lack of time in the moment or something like that. In terms of contacting the girl right away, I’m not saying being stalky or being needy, but remember at this point, if you know our model in “Revelation,” at this point it was supposed to have been already understood that the girl likes you and you the like the girl. And phone numbers are asked for or contact information is exchanged during comfort building, and what is that? That’s having a normal conversation, that’s having good conversation rapport, that’s vibing, that’s building connections, that’s building trust. And if you have a person in your life like that, a text message or a phone call is the most trivial thing. It’s basically the most obvious of things to start setting up the next time you guys are going to meet up. In terms of timing, right away: “Hey, get home safe, call me tomorrow.” In terms of the three-day rule or six-day rule, yeah, that’s old school, I know it was in that movie “Swingers,” but that’s just not something that we do.

What about as far as making plans? Is it a cop-out to just text her or do you actually have to call her up?

Either/or, it depends, because of the projects I have on my plate, I’d text more than I’d be calling, but if I want to give details… or talk or something I usually call.

Can you describe your perfect wingman?

I think anyone can be a good winger provided that you synchronize with the same strategy, if you will. And if you both respect the boundaries and you both have discipline, and I’m not saying that I do, or Mystery does all the time, especially when we’ve been drinking, but ideally when we see a girl…. Or for example, if I see a girl, and she’s attracted to me, she’s going to be throwing IOIs [indicators of interest] to my friend as well. Now my friend, he can misinterpret that as the girl coming on to him or he can understand because we both follow the same structure that this is normal, that her throwing IOIs to my friend is her attempt to get to know her because she wants to get to know me and my friends and my crew and my social circle. So don’t take this the wrong way to start escalating not isolating with her because that puts me into a position of having to be reactive and chase her, which lowers my value. I wouldn’t be in this fucking problem if you played your role right. And it requires someone willing to do that and most of all knowing how to do that, because I know a lot of good guys out there who are completely annoying to hell and they’re good people, doctors, police officers, but they haven’t taken the time to fully understand. When you really understand the game and the psychology aspect and you understand what your body and mind is doing to you, a lot of the time, I’m not saying all the time, but a lot of the time, you realize why you’re saying this, why you’re getting offensive, when your ego’s talking, when your ego is not talking. And a lot of time, most non-PUA people, they start saying and doing things that they have no clue why they’re fucking doing it. They just think it’s magically all happening. And your sitting there yourself saying, you’re not mad at this person but this person is inconvenient in the moment right now. It’s not that I’m not going to hang out with this person, it’s just that right now, if I go out, let’s say we get a table and I go out I’m usually the guy that a lot of my friends, I’m really into pickup and I’ve studied it for a number of years now, and that’s why a lot of friends will call me up because they’ll get the table, but then there will just be like all guys at the table and then I end up being the guy who goes out onto the floor, grabbing girls, bringing them the back. And if I go out and grab let’s say a three-set and I break them back. One guy starts creeping out one of the girls, guess what, the other two girls are going to want to leave. And I put in 20 minutes or if I really like the girl and we have a connection going, guess what, she’s going home that night and it’s because of him, and he’ll probably deny it the whole way home, and you’ve got to ask yourself, “Who the hell am I? I’m just some other guy? I’m in no position to educate somebody who doesn’t want my help or to give unsolicited advice?” But at the same time, if I pick up the phone to decide who I’m going out with the next night, it’s not going to be that person. That doesn’t mean to say I’m not going to go play a game of pickup basketball with him the next day or anything like that, but you’ve got to know people’s strengths and weaknesses, and what they’re good at and what they’re not good at.

Do you have a go-to pickup line?

Yeah, you know I used to be Mr. Routine. Mr. Pick-Up Line. But there’s good news and bad news. The bad news is I’m not the person to go talk to about like all the best routines in the world, but the good news is because after a certain point, these routines all fall under patterns of mine and what happens is when you start talking this way, doing these things, it starts integrating into your personality naturally so you can spot these things on the fly. You can be dynamically humorous, dynamically intelligent without having a set of routines that are funny or a set of routines that are interesting. So this is the most truthful answer at this moment: At this moment I don’t really use any openers. I go up and I say hello. Or if there is any one opener that I do use it’s a non-verbal body opener; I’ll go up and look at the girl and I’ll do this very overdramaticized rolling my eyes look like a girl’s mannerisms, or do the “Whatever” hand in your face gesture, which usually creates instant laughter. And then I turn around and I’m normal again and introduce myself and immediately start talking and start owning the conversation.

Warm them up with some humor.

Think about it. You have eight emotional dimensions, you know? There’s a fear dimension, you have a love dimension, and then each dimension there are shades of that primary emotion. For example, discomfort would be a shade of fear. Agreed?

Yep.

And happiness would be a shade of love, so most of the time you can look at a person and know what emotion that they’re on with a great deal of accuracy. If you need routines, it’s like in one to three seconds, you’ve got to take her out of discomfort and put her into happiness. An outward sign of happiness is laughter. Now that she’s in happiness and you’re the cause of it, you’re the stimulus, she’s going to be willing to talk to you for another couple minutes, and then if you can keep those core characteristics coming, because you should be working on your personality all the time, she’s going to deduce that you are this type of person. And not to sound cocky but I’ve had people make all kinds of weird statements to me: “Are you this funny? Are you this interesting? Are you this cool? Because you’ve cultivated your personality to where you can be interesting for a good amount of the time or be humorous a good amount of the time on end. And you can keep those characteristics coming to where there is nobody else in her environment or where she’s at that can surpass you. I’ll give you an example. If you’ve ever gone to a comedy show, and you’ve seen a good comic. Have you ever honestly laughed for an hour straight?

No.

Well, I have. I saw this one guy in Chicago and I laughed for an hour straight. It’s a very profound experience, and if you can make somebody laugh 10 times in a row, whether it’s a premeditated routine or if it’s just through your ability to be dynamically humorous, that is going to separate you from basically every other guy in the club. Maybe she’s bored, maybe she’s irritated of all the guys hitting on her, and then you come around and you’re the guy that within three minutes she’s laughed 10 times. You mean to say that you’re not the most emotionally relevant person in the world? Even if her friends want to go, she’s going to want to turn around and ask, “Do we really have to go?” Does that make sense?

Routines are good. I still endorse them for people who are new. However, what you want to do is, every routine, every routine causes some type of emotion to occur. Try to now understand a routine, the pattern of it, and start implementing those patterns without that routine into your personality to where you’re actually evolving into something better, and it happens quicker than you think. Now you take one month out of your life and dedicate it to the art form of humor, and in that one month you’re going to be, and I’m not saying you’re going to be Chris Rock, but in one month you are going to be a marginally more funny human being and be able to give people the gift of laughter better than you were at the beginning of the month. And just imagine doing that for years now. It’s like stand-up comics. You don’t think stand up comics have their routines? Chris Rock — I read a biography of him — he would specifically take his routine to try em out night after night after night. His pacing, his timing, his rhythm, all the stuff is planned and timed. It’s well thought through before he did the show. And it’s worth it. You see him here on HBO, for the last show he did, I think it’s called “Kill the Messenger,” it was some funny, man.

And it was three concerts filmed in three different cities and it was the same routine.

Yeah yeah yeah, exactly, it was a montage. One in London, one in South Africa, and one in new York.

On the topic of New York, South Africa… You’re out in L.A., based out there? We’re sure you travel to cities all over the country and all over the world? Do the girls change at all between city and city and do you adjust your technique at all when you’re in some place new?

Here’s the only barrier that at a certain point things that stop you usually are things that are out of your control like logistical things. For example, unless I proactively smile, or unless I dress in a way that conveys playfulness, personality, a girl — I’m not going to say she’ll find me unattractive, but she’ll definitely be on guard because do I look like a man who is capable of protecting or capable of danger? She just doesn’t know yet. So unless most of the time I can quickly convey my personality, but if there is a language barrier she doesn’t understand the language, it can sometimes thwart the process. So for example, if she’s speaking Japanese, I have to basically alter my — I still stay in set as long as I can take it and sometimes it’s work — but you have to speak in a way that’s a combination of body language and sub-communications and using a lot of facial…. Basically you’re communicating pure emotions, she doesn’t logically understand what you’re saying whatsoever, that can be one problem.

In terms of like Miami versus New York, there may be subtle differences, but some things I’m just oblivious to. Maybe if I really think about it, but I just don’t pay attention to these things. All I know is that when I do go down there to any one of those cities, I have the best time.

Do you have favorite city to party in? What city has the best girls?

On face value, Miami will appear to have the hottest girls. L.A. on face value will appear to have the hottest. And they do have very beautiful girls in both cities. Las Vegas as well, but in Las Vegas, everybody is a transient, meaning they’re coming and going. It’s not like you meet a girl at the Hard Rock, chances are she’s from Wisconsin or L.A. or someplace other than Las Vegas. I have a cousin in Vegas, if you ever spend time in Vegas, it’s a very blue-collar town, it’s not as exciting as the Strip. But what I realized is that in New York, if you know the right people, and you know the right venues to go to, there is a sea of beautiful women in New York. We’re talking really tall, classy, high heels, 5’11″ Ukrainian model hot girl in New York. You wont see them walking down 34th and 8th, you wont see them walking down to Starbucks, you know? It’s like an underworld that exists. It’s not an underworld, but it’s a world where you have to know the right people and the right venues and the right places to go to, but there is a horde of beautiful women up there.

It’s true. That’s why we live here.

I used to not like New York, because I hate the weather. The summertime is beautiful. I didn’t spend that much time where I had any quality friends in New York. But once I got to know the city and got to know the right people, just beautiful women in New York.

Are you spending more time in New York?

I’ll be spending time here and there, maybe Miami. We’re doing a boot camp in Australia, Mystery is leading that one. Didn’t want to go. Sometimes you’ve got a toss up between the work you have on your plate and…. Boot camps are very exhausting. They’ll derail you for four days, because you’re up all night.

Two last questions: Any other advice for our users or words of wisdom?

I would say this: It’s O.K. to be sexual. It’s O.K. to be looking for a girl or a girlfriend or girlfriends, but if you’re not doing it right, then at least be humble enough to know that you don’t know everything and go seek out that knowledge. When I was born, I didn’t know anything about anything. From different people I started acquiring knowledge in different areas. But if you’re willing to learn and put down your cockiness and go to somebody that does it better than you. And I guarantee you that all that effort and time and all that money that you spend on whatever cologne you think is going to work or whatever your shirt you think is cool or whatever bottle service you get because you think some girls are going to be attractive, all that are just things to supplement your core personality, because if that ain’t there, then all of it’s for not. I’ve seen a lot of my clients, my classes aren’t cheap, they’re like 3 or 4 thousand dollars, so the typical student I get went to college and has a job and has a business. These are successful men. So it’s testament to the fact that money alone hasn’t solved his problems for him. So if you want to invest in anything, really look at your personality, your lifestyle, your identity. And treat like that a piece of art and work on it because without that… the most important thing you can invest in is your personality.

Tell me anybody who’s ever made history he’s had a very magnificent, charismatic, powerful personality. Norman Schwarzkopf, Persian Gulf 1, he was the commanding general and he said, “On the subject of leadership, if I had to choose between character and ability, I would choose character because even if you don’t know how to load a tank or shoot a machine gun, but you can command a group of men to do those very important and dangerous tasks for you, they have to want to listen to you and respect you.” So even if you don’t have the technical skill yourself, but if you have the character that other men will follow you, your aggregate power increases. So invest in your personality. And it’s not something that’s handed to you and it’s not subject to change. You can be a better person and the reason I say “better,” it’s not because i want to make a feel good moment, I think being attractive is synonymous with typically that which is the best of humanity. Things like being humorous, being intelligent, being ambitious, being successful, and I’m not saying being fat and being lazy can get a girl, I’ll tell you to go be fat and lazy. It just doesn’t happen. So you’re going to find that if you want to invest in yourself that way, two things are going to happen, you’re going to end up attractive to women and you are going to be a better person. So what’s a better of spending your time than doing that?

Absolutely. And lastly, a lot of people find themselves in situations where they see the most beautiful girl and just want to talk to her, but they don’t just have the balls to do it. What kind of advice do you have for that situation?

Well, there’s a reason for that in a couple areas. The primary area I believe is the ego, you have to understand your ego. Because you’ve created this prisoner of your own device. In some way shape or for, the approval or rejection that you’re about to receive from this woman has some bearing on your own self-image as a successful man, as an attractive man. I don’t have that thought process. If that happens to me, cocky or not, I have the audacity to allow myself to believe, what’s wrong with her? Now some people say what’s wrong with me? Maybe she’s having a bad day. Move on, it doesn’t phase me. The whole buildup of the initial reaction is just not there, I come in and I’m not too friendly, I’m not too standoffish, I’m not 100% normal, at least from my perception, and it’s exactly what they want.

There’s a set of belief systems also that I teach and one of them is kind of counter-intuitive actually but it’s very helpful, is you’re talking to a girl, the last thing you want to think about is picking her up. Because your thoughts will show in your outward actions and your emotions and the things you say and the things you do. You go up to the girl, don’t even care about if you pick her up, don’t even want it, don’t even think it. Just focus on the process in the moment right now. That’s all you can do anyway. But to the guy who’s nervous about approaching the girl, yeah, you’re not the only one. Everyone gets nervous, you have to understand what causes that and don’t let it rule you. Have some control over it. You’ve got to do this in life with many other things: I don’t really ever feel like working out. I know it’s good for me so i motivate myself to get out of bed and do it. I didn’t feel like studying in college, in fact I hated studying in college, but I decided that now’s the time and I went and did it no matter what. I always ended up feeling sleepy or wanted to go have a cigarette or something, but you’ve got to sit down and fucking do it. This is no different. You’ve got to understand, okay, this is what’s happening. This is not an emotion that I’m going to relish in right now, I’m going to override it and plow forward.

Excerpted from http://www.brobible.com/. View full article here.