To follow up on Discovery’s recent article on creating a routine stack, I thought I’d cover one of the most commonly asked questions in the game “How do you write a DHV story?”
And let’s face it, for most guys it’s hard enough getting up the courage to walk up to a girl and say Hi, let alone coming up with cool, funny, or interesting things to tell her. And like most aspiring PUAs, when I first started learning the ropes in bars and clubs, I found that one of my biggest problems was running out of things to say. I would be talking to a fun group of girls, they would be laughing and touching me and showing me interest, and then my mind would just go blank. I would be standing there with this awesome group of girls who were totally into me and I would have no idea what to say or do next. And rather than risk doing something wrong or embarrassing myself, I would simply tell them to have a good night and politely eject out of the set.
And this went on and on for MONTHS until I realized the problem: I felt like I didn’t have enough to talk to talk about. This is an extremely common and debilitating problem for many aspiring PUAs out there, which is why we use canned material.
Canned material basically as any story, routine, or gambit that is previously prepared and memorized for use in the field. Have you ever told the same joke more than once? You’re using canned material. You know it’s a story that people enjoy so you tell it whenever there is a new opportunity with a new group of people to get a laugh.
And now we’re going to take your stories and amp them up. Read on and you will learn how to make your stories ATTRACTIVE instead of just enjoyable.
Your stories typically contain embedded DHVs (Demonstrations of Higher Value), which convey the qualities of the kind of man that women are evolutionarily programed to be attracted to. The kinds of DHVs you want to embed into your stories are things that flip the following attraction switches:
- Preselected By Women
- Protector of Loved Ones
- Leader of Men
- Successful Risk-taker
- World Traveler
- Willingness to Emote
- Social Alignments
You can find plenty of examples of canned material right here on our website, both on our blog and on our forum, in our books Revelation and The Pick-up Artist, our DVD sets, and in our upcoming routines manual. This material will give you tried-and-true examples of well-designed routines, giving you something to practice and get a feel for in the field.
One you get an idea of how a DHV routine should be delivered, you can start to write your own canned material in order to start conveying real stories from your life and fully convey your personality. Now you may not feel like you have a lot of DHVs in your life, or that you have nothing interesting going on to talk about, but if you follow the steps below, you will be surprised by just how much you find you have to say and how awesome and interesting you will sound when you talk about your life.
Step 1: Find Your Stories
You have stories and experiences that can be transformed into DHV stories, you just need to sit down and write them out. Think about some of the stories you tell or have told to your friends, family, and co-workers. Go through your photos or Facebook or even Twitter to remind yourself of some of the adventures and interesting situations you have been in. Your DHV stories can come from any part of your life. They can be any time you:
- Did something fun with a girl
- Did something you weren’t supposed to and got away with it
- Had something funny/scary/exciting happen on a trip
- Took charge of a situation
- Stood up to someone for someone else
- Organized something exciting
- Had someone’s back
- Got out of an awkward situation
- Did something nice for someone
- Did something spontaneous
- Accomplished something you are proud of
- Saw something funny/scary/exciting
Anything with humor, excitement, or tension is perfect here. Light social embarrassment is great for humor because it creates tension before releasing it
Of course, if you REALLY cant find anything to work with from your own life, you can always check out Cosmo Confessions for some good stories to make your own until you start living a little more of a high-value lifestyle.
Step 2: Write Your Stories Out In Point Form
Once you have gotten all your stories together, write out the basic story points for each. You don’t have to write it all out word-for-word. Just get the basic sequential set of events down on paper for yourself.
For example, I have a story about how my little brother crashed his truck. It’s a long story, and there is a great deal that I’m going to take out of the final piece. For now though, the story points would look like this:
- Was on a date with Samantha, took her home
- Little brother called at 4am, usually wouldn’t answer but it was weird that he called so late
- He tells me he hit a deer and that he crashed his truck, I get directions and get up to leave
- Samantha gets mad, I tell her that my brother was in an accident. She wants to come but I tell her to stay
- I drive around forever, and the roads have gotten really icy so I’m sliding everywhere
- Find my brother, the truck is totalled. It’s been rolled so many times that the frame is twisted. There isn’t a smooth bit of metal on the truck. It’s missing two of its wheels
- I run to the truck screaming his name and find him covered in blood, trying to rock it back onto it’s tires
- He tells me he wants to roll it back over so he can drive it home
- I take him to the hospital, he was very lucky to only have a concussion and a few bruised ribs and a few stiches here and there.
- He was only in the hospital for a couple of hours. Thank god for small town emergency rooms!
- On the way home, he asked me to pull over and buy him some smokes, he hands me a $20 from his pocket
- I’m kind of in shock myself so I don’t look at the bill until I get to the counter and have to pay
- I had the clerk the bill and it’s god blood all over it. The clerk looks at me like I’m a maniac
- I smile at him and say “yeah, its been one of those nights.” He must have though I killed some guy!
Step 3: Find/Add Your DHV Spikes
Your DHV spikes should be items in the story that flip the attraction switches above. Using my example above, you can see that my DHV spikes are:
- I was on a date (Preselection)
- I helped my brother when he was in need (Protector of Loved Ones)
- He thought he could still drive the truck home, and I scared the cashier with the bloody $20 (humor).
Your DHV spikes do not necessarily need to be over-the-top rock star lifestyle kind of DHVs people like to write. Not every story has to be about how to saved an exotic dancer and her box of puppies by getting your buddies who are martial arts experts/bouncers to help you lift a burning bus you saw crash while you were driving around in your brand new car. Your DHV spikes should never be the point of the story, and it should never feel like you are bragging about yourself (although you CAN brag about your friends). They should feel like incidental details that just get mentioned off-hand while you are telling your story.
Also keep in mind that you don’t need to hit every single switch in one single story. Usually just a couple is more than enough to make the story compelling. But if you find that your story is lacking certain DHVs, don’t be afraid to exaggerate a little and spruce them up. Maybe that girl you were with on that fun adventure was your ex-girlfriend instead of that girl you had a crush on? Maybe you had dealt with a similar situation before so you were only a little worried (even though in reality you were about to piss your pants)? Or maybe that guy you protected your girlfriend from backed right down and apologized instead of trying to intimidate you? It’s ok to stretch the facts a LITTLE when you’re writing these routines. Women do this ALL the time. It’s just a part of how flirting works.
Step 4: Watch for and remove DLVs
Demonstrations of Lower Value, or DLVs, are the opposite of DHVs. They tell your target that you are not a high value male and cause her to feel less attracted to you. Most men don’t even realize just how much they DLV themselves in the field when they talk about how they only have a few friends, or how they haven’t been in a relationship in a while, or when they brag about that time they saw something embarrassing happen to their friend, etc etc etc.
The kinds of things you want to exclude from your stories are anything that causes her to feel uncomfortable or that demonstrate that you lack the DHVs listed above or that display bad social intuition. Things like:
- Anything involving bugs, feces, vomit, blood, snot, other bodily fluids, etc.
- Any time you were rude to or angry at a woman, old person, child, or person in the service industry (i.e. yelling at your girlfriend)
- Any time you laughed or took pleasure in something mean, cruel, or hurtful (i.e. that time your sister’s prom dress was ruined)
- Any time you did something that could be considered creepy or a social violation (i.e. texting a woman more than two or three times)
- Complaining about or putting down your friends or ex’s (i.e. how you’re always there for your friends, but whenever you need their help they always let you down).
- Any time you followed someone else’s orders or demands
- Anything that associates you with other low-value people
So in my story, I’m going to scrap the entire bit about the blood , as it’s obviously too gross and weird to be talking about in the field. Also the about Samantha getting mad that I had to leave should go too.
Step 5: Trim The Fat
As you develop your routine, it is good to remember that you will most likely be telling these stories in loud, busy bars and nightclubs. These sorts of venues are not good places for long, drawn-out routines because how suddenly you can be interrupted or how quickly your set will lose interest if your story drones on too long. Your DHV routines should be short and sweet.
Below is a basic, general structure of a DHV routine:
- A few sentences to bait the group to hear your story by introducing it with a question or a statement that creates mystery and intrigue, such as “I had… the… SCARIEST night of my life last week.”
- A few sentences to hook your and keep them interested. Within first three to four sentences you should have said something captivating, interesting, or DHV-laden. This way, even if you get cut off within the first few sentences, or for some reason you have to snip the thread and stack (more on that below), you should have at least uploaded value. And if you have created mystery or intrigue, your set may find themselves wanting to know the rest of the story anyway.
- A few sentences to describe what happened and build tension as you reel her further and further into the story. Using pauses, inflection, and by describing what you were feeling, you draw her further and further into the story, causing her to feel the emotions of the event for herself. Build tension by leading up to something humorous or exciting.
- Release the tension with your punchline, what you’ve learned, or the exciting results of the whole thing.
- A secondary punchline or release, to compound the positive emotions she is feeling. This bit is optional, but it never hurts to have a second funny or exciting thing to say to add to your set’s laughter. This helps you become a “really funny guy” as opposed to “the guy that told that funny story”.
So from my example, I’m going to trim getting directions from my brother, as well as the bit about Samantha wanting to come along, since they are basically irrelevant details. I’ll also try to word it as succinctly as possible, as the less I say about something, the more questions my set can ask me.
Step 6: Add Pauses
Adding pausing to your stories enhances the tension and excitement, while also helping you slow down your delivery. This will make your story more captivating. In fact, if you get your delivery down, you can tell stories about absolutely NOTHING and people will sit and listen to you intently. Try not to go crazy with pausing, or it will lose it’s effect and you will end up sounding like William Shatner.
Use pausing to build tension before releasing it. Reel them in by pausing, then release then tension with something humorous or exciting.
and I come around the side and I seem him… and this WAVE of relief washes over me…and he’s trying to rock… the TRUCK… back onto it’s wheels… because he thinks he can drive it home!
…and I… come around… the side… and I seem…him… and this… wave… of relief… just washes… all over me… and he’s trying to rock the truck back onto it’s wheels, because he thinks… he… can drive it home!
In the end, my finished routine will look like this:
PUA: I had… the… SCARIEST night of my life last week!
It was like 4am and I get this call from my little brother. Now I had been out with some friends all night and was in bed… so normally I wouldn’t even answer it. But it just felt weird… you know? Like if he was calling at this time of night…something… must… be wrong. So I answer and he sounds really out of it… he’s like “hey kev I dodged a… deer and I had an accident… Can you come pick me up?” And obviously, it’s my little brother… so I just hop right out of bed and I’m like “babe, Samantha, my brother’s in trouble so I gotta roll but I’ll be back.”
So I’m way out on some backroad… and I come around a corner… and I see all this… wreckage strewn across the road… and then I see his truck… and it’s laying on its side… and it’s been rolled so many times… that the frame is actually twisted.
And my heart… STOPS… because I don’t see my brother anywhere… I’m fearing the worst… I jump out of my car and start running towards the truck cause I can see it sorta… rocking back and forth… And I’m screaming his name… and I come around the side and I seem him…
…and this WAVE of relief washes over me…
…and he’s trying to rock… the TRUCK… back onto it’s wheels… because he thinks he can drive it home!
And that’s why I love my little brother.
[cue laughter, IOIs, and stack forward]
That’s it for now guys. Build yourself some DHV material and start practicing it.