How to handle intentional avoidance?
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  1. #1
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Hey guys,i have been gaming for a while, and i live in NYC. I am doing daygame, and for most of the sets i open, most of them, at least 2/3 of the sets i open, i can at least make them laugh/put a big smile on their face.
    However, there's a smaller portion of sets, maybe around 10%, that i just cannot open at all. I walk up, i say hi, they walk the other way/pretend not to here me and walk faster.... these responses exist because girls are annoyed for being approached too much,by the salesman, survey man, and bumps... I have tried negging them, it just doesn't work in these cases, girls give me the attitude that i am running an unoriginal canned line...(although i know the power of neg theory)

    Does anybody know how to handle these intentional avoidance consistently? If anybody has any tips on it, it would be greatly appreciated!!!


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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Frankly, 2/3 opening sounds fine. Are you opening over your shoulder with a smile?


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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Yes, and since now its cold, I rarely sarge inside a park, I do mostly street game. I always open over the shoulder with a smile. Most of the girls I approach are moving targets. I open over the shoulder with a smile, then when I got them to stop walking and turn their body toward me, I turn my body toward them to reward for good behavior.

    The 10% of those whom I can't open are those on the streets, they are in their automatic rejection mode--thanks to the workers and bumps. When I sarge inside a store, the worst I get is disinterest- low energy and atention deficit disorders from girls. I plow forward is fine.But it doesn't seem right to go into the same store week after week, buy nothing, and just pick up girls, that looks weird. So I focus mainly on street games.

    And I don't really know how to shut down their automatic rejection mode. If you have any advice, it would be appreciated!

    Thank you!


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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    it's hard to tell through text ... unless actually being there to see whats going on and feel the vibe ... but one thing would be to work on your micro-calibration ... are your IOI's and IOD's being balanced out ...

    also you can work on getting every girl if that is what you chose ... but don't be bummed out if you lose a set ... because if you are screening right from the get go ... it becomes obvious that certain girls aren't even your type ... even if you did number close them you probably wouldn't call them back

    so yea man 2/3 is definitely good man ... but if you really want that 3 out of 3 ... it may not happen every time ... but you can definitely increase your chances by working on your microcalibration


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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Microcalibration definitely has its power, but it doesn't seem to work when a girl is giving some strong avoidance. When I approach, I have my opener and smile(IOI), but I open over the shoulder(IOD).

    1st Example: This is a while ago in Times Square of NYC
    Me: Hi!...( about to run an opener)
    HB: No thanks
    Me: For what? I havent said anything yet... By the way, you hair looks nice, are they real?
    HB: Yea[ Walk Faster]
    It's different from The Game, where Style sarged HB11, the girl give style the i don't care attitude, but not strong avoidance, then style said,'' Your hair looks nice, are they real? The HB11 said,'' Yeah, Pull it!''

    2nd Example: Today at Soho ---- Since neg didn't work, I've been trying open loop, it didn't work either...
    Me: Hi![ Act like I pulled a earphone out of my ear, non-verbally communicate to take of her earphone(IOI), I was over the shoulder(IOD)]
    HB: [Looked at me, break eye contact and continued walking]
    Me: You come across as both confident,AND insecure, you know why? ( Open loop)
    [ I expected to bait her curiosity, but she's not curious at all]
    HB: Sorry, No English( from her perfect accent, obviously a lie)
    Me: What? So you've been cutting your english class, that's why you don't speak english? Hey, I am telling your mom! Then when you go back to school, I'll have your english teacher assign you 10 essay everyday! ( strong IOD)
    [ She just ignored me like she didn't hear me, and kept walking]

    These strong avoidance are the toughest things when it comes to opening,.. I'll keep trying different stuffs... Mystery said in Revelation that these responses should not be generated in the first place. But how? We can use some IODs to help us, but we can't eliminate 100%.
    Meanwhile, I think the solution would be to use dominance-- physically grab their arm, or go up and block their path.... But that is a huge IOI, as well as neediness... I will need a huge IOD in order to pull that off--- I don't know what would be the huge IOD.


  6. #6
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Strength View Post
    Microcalibration definitely has its power, but it doesn't seem to work when a girl is giving some strong avoidance. When I approach, I have my opener and smile(IOI), but I open over the shoulder(IOD).

    1st Example: This is a while ago in Times Square of NYC
    Me: Hi!...( about to run an opener)
    HB: No thanks
    Me: For what? I havent said anything yet... By the way, you hair looks nice, are they real?
    HB: Yea[ Walk Faster]
    It's different from The Game, where Style sarged HB11, the girl give style the i don't care attitude, but not strong avoidance, then style said,'' Your hair looks nice, are they real? The HB11 said,'' Yeah, Pull it!''

    2nd Example: Today at Soho ---- Since neg didn't work, I've been trying open loop, it didn't work either...
    Me: Hi![ Act like I pulled a earphone out of my ear, non-verbally communicate to take of her earphone(IOI), I was over the shoulder(IOD)]
    HB: [Looked at me, break eye contact and continued walking]
    Me: You come across as both confident,AND insecure, you know why? ( Open loop)
    [ I expected to bait her curiosity, but she's not curious at all]
    HB: Sorry, No English( from her perfect accent, obviously a lie)
    Me: What? So you've been cutting your english class, that's why you don't speak english? Hey, I am telling your mom! Then when you go back to school, I'll have your english teacher assign you 10 essay everyday! ( strong IOD)
    [ She just ignored me like she didn't hear me, and kept walking]

    These strong avoidance are the toughest things when it comes to opening,.. I'll keep trying different stuffs... Mystery said in Revelation that these responses should not be generated in the first place. But how? We can use some IODs to help us, but we can't eliminate 100%.
    Meanwhile, I think the solution would be to use dominance-- physically grab their arm, or go up and block their path.... But that is a huge IOI, as well as neediness... I will need a huge IOD in order to pull that off--- I don't know what would be the huge IOD.
    The over the shoulder and smile are technical moves that should give you an idea for microcalibrating ... I understand that the MM is very technical ... but I think that is only for the students to have something specific to execute to get a feel for what all these things really mean (at least I would hope that the VA staff is on that level of congruency) ... with that being said you should focus on really understanding the pshycology behind microcalibrating and really internalize it to the point where you are microcalibrated as a being ... to the point where you don't even have to think ... my whole goal for this is to internalize all these concepts so much that I can go up to women and just stand there and have them attracted to me ... I calls my learning "method" ... the way of being ... I don't focus on faking it till I make it ... I don't put on any performance ... I do every set just being myself ... and focus on internalizing all these teachings ... so as far as microcalibrating is concerned there is a deeper pshycology behind it besides the technical moves which should be explored ... you should feel emotions that cause you to respond with IOI's and IOD's ... it shouldn't be a logical calculated move ... to give you an idea and something practical to think about ... try removing the smile ... your already IOIing by speaking ... thats just one example out of many ... usually my body language is pretty direct due to natural instincts ... but I calibrate on everything else ... I am learning to do over the shoulder one step at a time ...

    it is also useful to understand the pshycology behind hooking a set ... you must be intriguing enough for the set to want to continue talking to you ... but convey enough disinterest not to spook the set with an agenda

    calibrate your opener ... one opener will not work on everyone ... make a judgement call on what to open with ... I usually make mine up on the spot which has its own challenges ... I have sticking points a bit further along ... but very rarely do I get rejected ... to be honest I can't even picture what someone would have to do to have someone reject them ... unless its miscalibrated to the point where you cause a bad emotion in the target

    aaaanndd then you have girls on their period ... certain things are just out of your control ... that is why it's useless to analyze everything ... if your getting 90% hooks then you are doing pretty dam good

    The books give you goals and guidelines ... I doubt highly that mystery gets 100% ... and yea just keep working on it ... where there is a will there is a way ... you can open with "OMG you have a green spider in your hair!" ... that will get there attention with sincere delivery ... also don't grab there arm but instead.you can walk slightly in front of them ... make a dead stop ... and put the back of your hand on there arm (inside of elbow) ... forcing them to stop ...

    But these are just ideas to help you achieve your goal I think overall you are doing just fine


  7. #7
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    To be straight forward with you, my friend, you are not going to successfully open 100% of your sets. In my opinion, you're thinking too much into this. It's not because of you're not "negging right" or they are all "tired of being approached". Let's sit back and think realistically for a moment. Let's think as human beings. People get in bad moods. Anything can be going through her head at the time that she ignores you. She can be depressed, married, agitated, in a rush to an important event, shy, anything. Rejection is inevitable Just move on to the next set because it's really all a numbers game.


  8. #8
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    Ceef, so the ''OMG, you have a green spider in your hair?'' that stuff will sure make a girl to react, she's trying to get the spider off, but i min later, she'll find out there's no spider,then what do you do?
    You can't say '' Oh, that's a joke'' That comes across like an asshole without social intelligence.
    You can't say '' Oh,I just said that so you would stop, cause I really want to meet you'' Thats way too needy.

    So, what can you do?

    As far as the 100%, you're right, its not really necessary, but it's good to be always able to get as close as possible..


  9. #9
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    there is no step by step technique ... you could do millions of things ... for example since I always do the first thing that comes to mind ... the first thing that comes to mind while I am typing this ... is ... after she finds out there is no spider ... I would stand there and smile until she calls me an asshole ... that would be my next step ... and then I would make something else up on the spot ... couldn't tell you what that would be right now ... I don't plan my sarges out

    Good Luck Man


  10. #10
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    How to handle intentional avoidance?

    It needs to feel natural/be calibrated. They should not be intentionally avoiding you...it says that something is wrong with your approach/delivery.

    I agree with the guys who say open over your shoulder and smile...but the opener should also be friendly. It should not look like you work for Greenpeace, so don't open with Excuse me. It's funny though....Greenpeace has learned a lot over the years and they no longer open that way...they sound more like PUAs now.

    Other than the canned material (openers, negs, etc.), what are you actually talking to the women about?

    Oh, stores employees are great! Good quality and they respond really well to game. This is definitely true in NYC and DC since I've done a ton of daygame in both. Also, it should be warm enough to game central park now. Hit the bookstores too.

    -Cuisine
    Daygamer.net


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