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Thread: HB Boyfriend
11-01-2014, 10:22 AM #1
Hey guys. I met this girl last year. Her name is Nicole. Last year we didn't really speak or anything. Earlier this year we started chatting and hanging out etc. Just casual. The problem is she has a boyfriend. They have been together for more than a year now. We have gotten to a point where we want eachother so much, but she is afraid to do anything about it because she feels it's wrong. Last night we were on a date and I asked her if she wanted to kiss me. She said yes and no. She said yes, because she wants to know what it feels like to kiss me and no because she knows it's wrong. The fact that she is attracted to me is no question. I want to know. What do I do? How do I play this one? Do I play it cool and wait for her to come around and risk losing her, or do I play hard and kiss close her??? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank You.
11-01-2014, 07:29 PM #2
I'm no PUA, but I do know that a girl will stay in a relationship with a guy even if she's looking for a "new" or "better" relationship. I've noticed they do this for the protection, familiarity, resources that her current relationship offers to her. Or, some girls want their "stable" relationship and will have people on the side for fun or excitement. It's important not to make her feel judged.
11-03-2014, 12:29 PM #3
Thank you for the reply. No. I make sure not to make her feel judged. Yesterday I told her in a text that I am gonna do what I should have done a long time ago. Walk away. She replied by saying that she does not want to lose me. She does not want me to walk away.
11-03-2014, 05:16 PM #4
Did you read the story i posted yesterday in FR? I mainly posted it as a suggestion to you. But when i commented here with the link to the post, it got auto-moderated.
11-03-2014, 05:21 PM #5
i do think you took a brave step. sometimes when you know no other way, walking away is the best option (mainly to preserve your ego)... But i actually really wanted you to try and fight for the win here... Would have liked to know how it turns out.
11-05-2014, 08:44 AM #6
Hey. I didn'y walk away. She said she didn't want me to. The main reason I told her that I was going to walk away was to demonstrate the willingness to walk away. That is a very important trait to have as an alpha male. So at the moment we do not really talk. But. This means that I am building rapport. I will call her sooner or later and just play a little phone tag or something. The main thing that I want to establish with her is that she enjoys herself more when she is with me than with her boyfriend. I think I am already close to that goal, given how much time he spends with her, buy yet she still always wants to spend time with me... I'll keep you informed as it goes...
11-06-2014, 03:12 AM #7
I hope you didn't take what i said too harshly..? Perhaps i should have better
explained my opinion on the topic.
Note: This is just my personal opinion, so i speak under correction.
I completely agree with you on demonstrating the willingness to walk away.
I don't want you to misinterpret what i meant though.
I understand now that, you did it with the intention of it being a hit.
i just personally consider it a bit risky, only to be used as a last resort
option, because i believe there is a very real chance that the woman might
say "i understand" and not play the game with you. This has happened to me
before and the reason is because, that girl did genuinely like me, but she
also genuinely felt guilty about cheating on her boyfriend, and so me saying
that relieved that pressure.
But even when it works, i don't really like the arising situation.
Most of the time you and the girl will refrain from talking for a while.
You're gonna have to play it cool (in order to stay congruent with your
action) In the meantime, she's gonna be spending more time with her
boyfriend and depending on who her boyfriend is, there's the very real chance
that they might work things out and be happy again (i know this because i was
in that situation once, and after one talk i reminded her why she loved me
and we were able to reignite that fire)
And even if that doesn't happen. walking away gave you some extra points,
but later when you do start talking to her again, unless they broke up,
you might end up being back in the same situation again, and you'll have to
game her or say something smooth anyway in order to get in her pants. Which
you could have also done the first time, before you "walked away"..
Again, this is just my personal opinion on the topic, which i formed from my
own personal experiences, so i might be wrong, but that's just how i feel.
Hope this makes sense to you. And still, wish you the best of luck with this
11-06-2014, 06:05 AM #8
Hey man. Thanks for the reply. The thing is I really did my homework before telling her that I was gonna walk away. See. She has not yet cheated on her boyfriend. I am not gonna let that happen. So this leaves her curious. She really wants to see what it's like to kiss me and spend time with me in another way. I only give her a little bit and take it away again. Like cat string theory. It works like a bomb. I get what you are saying from your past experience. The trick is, like I say, not giving her everything unless she kisses you or leaves her boyfriend for you. It's better to let things brew for a while when she is still very attracted to you. See what happens now is if her boyfriend makes ONE mistake, who is she gonna turn to and who is she gonna wanna be with? So yes. I'm playing it cool at the moment. And like you say. It would take one word to spark the attraction again. I am waiting for the right moment to spark that. In the meantime I am still gaming other girls like crazy. Thanks for the good luck.
11-08-2014, 10:13 PM #9
11-12-2014, 05:45 PM #10
You speak too much for her, like you are her boyfriend already. Personally, i would leave her alone.