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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2009

    reluctant - from afc to pua journal


    I've been a long time keyboard jockey and afc. About a week ago I got fed up with being the biggest afc in the world and decided to begin putting everything to use that I've been reading about just now in my senior year of college. I'm going to document as much as I can here. Hopefully this will help me reinforce my mistakes and help me and everyone here learn something.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2009

    reluctant - from afc to pua journal


    House Party - 2 sets opened and blown

    Went out to a house party tonight after "pregaming" with my roommates and people they invited over. I didn't drink which for me is an accomplishment in itself. Earlier I prepared a routine stack for the house party and put a copy on my phone.

    There were a few girls that I didn't really know at my apartment, but I didn't open them because they live next door and I didn't want to make it an awkward all year every time I saw them.

    We left for the house party and when we arrived I spent a great deal of time walking around the small cramped house trying to "choose a target". I saw some openings but I didn't approach and broke the three second rule. I began walking around the venue with my drink held down by my hip, but not smiling as I was scouting the room. I watched as the sets that I was going to approach go in logistically difficult situations to open.

    I walked around the tiny house watching my friends get drunk and have a good time. An hour and a half later I found a two set that I wanted to open to be free again from any logistical problems.

    Me: hey, real quick, I have to get back to my friends in a moment. This is a little weird but can you name all 5 oceans?
    hb7: Alantic, Pacific, Indian, African.
    Me: hey! African isn't an ocean. It doesn't count. The reason why I ask is that I was talking to my friend and we were trying to figure out all of the names and couldn't do it. I don't think anyone can do it. Oh my god! Both of you have C shaped smiles.

    (Guy behind them that was talking to them an hour before begins orbiting.)

    Me: "Finishing the c's vs. u's routine"
    hb6: really are you serious?
    me: I'm completely serious...You guys aren't weirdos are you?
    hb7: (giggles) no...
    me: alright I'm going to give you the pyscho test.

    (both girls begin drifting away)

    Guy orbiting: (literally says out loud to himself) I don't know what he's saying he changes topics so fast.

    hb6: I'm going to go.

    me: So two girls go to a funeral, they're both sisters.

    (a second amog approaches)

    amog 2: "says something, can't remember"

    me: oh my god dude, where did you get that shirt? I had that same exact shirt. Last semester a girl stayed over my place and ended up liking it and took it.

    amog 2: *half jokingly* are you calling this a girl's shirt?

    me: no. It was my favorite shirt, I let her wear it and I never saw it again. Now I have to buy two of everything just in case a girl steals it from me.

    amog 2: that or you can just not buy nice things.

    me: exactly!

    (I lost hb7 dealing with the amog, she turned away to talk to the guy behind her)

    me: alright I got to get back to my friends, pleasure meeting you.


    Biggest Problems that I know of

    Body language/ Delivery:

    I approached the set from an angle, like I was walking by but the two set was positioned like and L and I ended up facing one of them.

    I didn't body rock at all, especially after finishing the opener thread.

    I didn't speak slowly and changed topics fast, so much so that someone not even "in the set" commented on it.

    Eye contact: I made eye contact only a couple of times for brief seconds.

    Addressing the interupts

    The second AMOG actually entered the set and interrupted me. I tried to, let's be honest, be nice but blow him out and I lost the set completely. Although I never did reach a hook point.

    Approach 2

    Before I left I wanted to approach another set. I saw the set I wanted to approach. A four set with three girls; a HB7, two HB 8.5s, and a guy who was talking to them for about a half hour. They were giving him intermittent iois.

    me: Hey guys, really quick, I have to get back to my friends. Is kissing cheating?

    HBs: yes
    AMOG: no, well it depends. It depends, do you love your girlfriend.

    Me: No, a buddy of mine.
    AMOG: what? what? Dude seriously.
    (walks over next to me).
    AMOG: You got to tell me.
    Me: wait, Let me finish. Let me finish.
    AMOG: okay, I'll let you finish.
    Me: A buddy of mine has a girlfriend. The thing is that she always goes to parties, gets drunk, and makes out with people. But here's the thing, they're girls. Is that cheating?

    Girls: No.
    Me: wait! Total double standard.
    AMOG: "Says something"
    Me: alright, thanks, it was a pleasure meeting you.

    (I begin to walk away, AMOG follows).

    AMOG: wait man! what's your name? My name's ____. Nice to meet you.

    (He slaps me on the back extremely hard)

    Me: *reply and leave*


    Biggest Problems that I know of

    Body language/ Delivery:

    I didn't body rock at all, especially after finishing the opener thread.

    I didn't speak slowly with pauses.

    Eye contact: I made eye contact only a couple of times for brief seconds.


    I should've negged the AMOG when he interrupted me since he was being a social violator.

    Not pushing the set
    I set the goal of just opening and bailed after I successfully opened. I should have pushed until I got blown out. This opener did have much more

    Overall issues:

    Body Language and Delivery
    : biggest problem by far. I need to really get this engrained into me.

    Never reached the hook point with either set.

    Approaching. I actually don't feel much of any anxiety when I approach tbh. I guess that I've blown out with girls so many times that approaching doesn't bother me. My problem is over thinking though I analyzed when the best time to approach would be. Walking around the relatively small house probably dropped my value to the floor before I even opened.

    Any feedback is definitely welcomed!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2012

    reluctant - from afc to pua journal

    Hey man, big props for taking the plunge.

    I feel like you're just spouting off routine after routine. You're becoming a social robot, and it definitely scared off some girls and angered some guys. I would not be surprised if you weren't invited back to that house party.

    First off, I personally dislike routines and go a more natural route. It sounds like you're spouting off the routines so quickly, people just aren't understanding what on earth you're talking about. Your subjects change so fast and furiously that people are getting confused. First off, SLOW DOWN and RELAX. You aren't completely congruent with using this stuff, so it will naturally feel a little awkward. Keep practicing and it will improve over time.

    Second, your facial expressions and body language must be off. You need to come in with 1 or 2 levels higher energy than the girls'. You're taking value away if you come in with your shoulders slumped and face stoic. There's people who are looking for the fun, and people that are making the fun. Be a fun maker, not a fun taker! Plus, who doesn't enjoy fun?

    You're early in your development, but you're also on your way. Congrats on making your first of many approaches. Remember that all these routines and openers are just training wheels, and you should eventually ween yourself off of them so you have the natural confidence and social calibration to make a good solid approach.

    Hang in there!
    Ben J

  4. #4

    reluctant - from afc to pua journal

    1) Lose the "pleasure meeting u at the end." Its a party not a formal event, plus dont say it of u dont mean it, people pick up on this and hate it when ur not honest I would say "cool" if they blow u out and walk away, its more alpha if u ask me.

    2) Lose the routines or use the bare minimum of them to interact. If drinking puts u in a fun mood do it, i know they advocate against this but rules were meant to be broken plus ur more urself if ur comfortable doing this and will appear more confident.

    3) Watch "Millers crossing"and "The usual suspects" and learn from Gabriel Byrne's body language, he can command the screen with just his actions and very little words.

    4) Hang with ur friends a little more if they're having fun and ur with them the party will come to u and will have social proof to show 4 this

    5) Slow ur words and talking down like the dude above said, ur not being congruent with ur words and actions and r confusing people and scaring them a bit

    6) How do u deal with AMOG's befriend them or try to AMOG them? Ur words r important to c how to deal w/them effectively.
    Let me know...

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