Best counter upon approach
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  1. #1
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    Best counter upon approach

    There was something last night that phased me off, not for the whole night, but for a couple of minutes afterwards and now that I think about it, I can't think a of good way to counter the reaction the girls in the 2-set had.

    I was in a club, opening sets, hooking most of them. However, I get to this 2-set HB7s:

    "Hey guys, I need an opinion real quick, if a guy has been dating a girl for a month, she found out he kept pictures of his exes and asked him to throw them away, should he do it?"

    HB7-1: "Hmm depends if he's still in good terms with his exs."
    HB7-2Leaning towards the first one: "Do you know him?"

    Right after that, a guy (their friend) came up and started talking to them. I left the set with a smile like nothing happened.

    However, I can't think of a good way to counter the "Do you know him?" reaction if it ever happens again. I don't think I had enough value at that point to get the attention back to me with the "aaaaaaand back to me" that Mystery uses.

    What do you guys think?


  2. #2
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    Best counter upon approach

    That is actually a really good question. I had that happen to me too!

    I doubt there's many people on the forum who actually goes out to bars who has enough experience to answer that one.

    I only encountered that "Do you know him?" thing once but I imagine it could happen again.


  3. #3
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    Best counter upon approach

    "God is your friend *always* this rude? You can't take her anywhere, honestly, what is she like.... So, do you know what you guys *just* did, right there?"

    They might look at each other at this point...

    "Ah! Right there you did it again! You were communicating with one another just through a look. Girls do this with each other all the time, guys, not so much!

    It's like the other day - I was out with my buddy, and this *really* fat, ugly, sweaty girl came up and started *flirting* with me.... I looked at him, as if to say DUDE, help me get OUT of this situation. He just stared back at me with this blank look on his face. He literally had no clue what I wanted. Typical.

    So how do you guys know each other? Oh yeah so are you best friends or something...............

    I tried to use the ** to show how I would say this, where I would place emphasis and pause over certain words.


  4. #4
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    Best counter upon approach

    Wow! This is great man. I like the fact that you're stacking with a story (which I hadn't even thought of, even though I should have).

    Were you trying to turn on the "Preselection" switch by mentionning you were hit on by a fat, ugly and sweaty girl? I'm not sure that would really be the best thing. Maybe a cute girl, but very drunk. Now you're preselected, but you're honest (or whatever) because you didn't hit on a drunk girl that clearly wanted you. Just my two cents.


  5. #5
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    Best counter upon approach

    Not the right way to counter. The interrupt is one of two things. Either, the friend interrupting thinks you're hot and want to get in the conversation with you or she is lightly (technical term) cock-blocking and could be an obstacle in the short term future. By saying anything negative about her rudeness to your initial target will work against you, and if the interrupt thinks you're hot you're blowing her out in front of her friend, which makes you look ruder. And if she is lightly cock-blocking then and you don't want her to escalate out of control and blow you out of set.

    And never talk about the fat girl that hit on you. It will never go down well. What if the interrupting friend is the really fat one? or they have a third friend not yet in the picture who's quite the bombshell?


    The correct way is to say immediately to the girl interrupting,

    "You must be the friend, how you doin...", and immediately run your thread on her switching targets and transition to the two-set scenario.

    Its a more strategic and allows you to assess the situation on the interrupt before committing to a course of action. Its similar to textbook stuff on befriending the obstacle, but you don't know if she is an obstacle or not. Interrupts can happen all the way through to the point you make out with the girl and if you don't assess the situation clearly things can get mega, out of control.


  6. #6
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    Best counter upon approach

    Is this girl an interrupt? It sounds like she was already part of the 2 set when Lebourg opened.

    The way I'm thinking about it is that HB7-2 has shown active disinterest in you with her comment and therefore deserves an IOD in return. Hence my statement (said in a joking way) about being rude and not being able to take her anywhere.

    Or is it correct, as you say, that because she is an obstacle and not the target, you can ignore the IOD deserves an IOD stuff and just focus on befriending her? Would it change the situation if HB7-2 was a HB10?

    I see both your points about the fat girl comment, I would obviously never say it if the interrupt was overweight herself. I find it gets a laugh though, especially when you tell them how *sweaty* she was... Maybe this is wrong though, hmm...


  7. #7
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    Best counter upon approach

    As Tartan said, the second girl, the one that asked the first one if she knew me, was already part of the set when I opened. It was a 2-set, so yeah... I was blown out by that second girl.

    In that case, was it best to befriend her? Or to IOD in return? I think if she was not my target, I should have befriended her, but if she was, I should have IODed. Seems right?


  8. #8
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    Best counter upon approach

    Points taken let me explain better,

    Whether an internal or external interrupt, you still have to address it at such, I use the same definition for both because both types are dealt with in the same way.

    On the IOI/IOD stuff, it depends how you interpret the way she is saying it. Even if it is said in an active disinterest manner, you still need more information on the situation. Turning her active disinterest around can be done in that first initial chat and the thing is you don't know if she is, or not an obstacle. If interrupt is an obstacle you'll find out very quickly by the manner of your first initial chat, if interrupt is a target then you'll know her interest levels again through that first chat. It doesn't stop you from uploading your DHVs in those first few minutes because the first girl is right next to you in the set and will hear everything you have to say.

    Yeah it could change the situation, if the interrupt was a 10 and the girl you approached was less good looking switching attention would work in your favour and your calibrated neg would work, after all she is interrupting because she wants the attention. If both girls were 10s you would simply switch your attention between the two, then bring in whatever neg to whichever is your real target when the situation calls for it. And also there are 10-10s and 7s who think their 10s, same situation it would be better and easier to switch your attention to the one giving you less shit to deal with. If your caught out with both being 7-10s, treat them as 7s, not as 10s.


  9. #9
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    Best counter upon approach

    The other problem with Tartan's solution is that the CB is likely to interrupt after your 2 sentences.

    I was in a situation where I was with a pivot and opened over the shoulder on an a 8 set of girls who wandered next to me. I opened one of the girls and another from the other side of the circle did the "do you know him thing" and she looked pissed

    It's almost as if the girls were not there to meet guys and they were celebrating their own private party and you are crashing it...and that some of the girls want to keep it a private party.

    It could also be that the CB/UG is jealous and knows what is happening. Could you imagine what it would do to an UG's head if everytime the HB gets hit on but the UG never gets attention.

    The only thing I could think of to counter the "Do you know him" is probably to develop some kind of banter line off of it.


  10. #10
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    Best counter upon approach

    If you open up with a false time constraint like..."hey, quick question guys"... it should be obvious that you don't know them.

    If the False time constraint doesn't help... I would take control. "I don't know you guys... just wanted a female opinion"


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