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Thread: Physical Disability
08-18-2009, 03:48 PM #1
This is my first post. I've been following this stuff for a while and I think it's truly awsume. I hope to become active in this forum cause I think it's great people help each other out in this constant pursuit of self development.
There's an issue that's been bugging me for quite a while now and it goes like this:
I have a physical disability as such that I only really have one arm. The other stops at like my elbow and has a bit of a hand thingy at the end of it. Now this doesn't handicap me at all, like I can do anything anyone else can - somehow! Like I play guitar and type with it and all sorts so I'm completely fine in that sense.
The thing is I've been alive long enough now to know that every single person I meet always thinks the same thing within the first few seconds of meeting me. "Why's his arm like that?"
I'd like to think of myself as a very outgoing person, lively and can hold a good conversation with pretty much anyone I meet (thanks greatly to the game and all this stuff!) so I know that within a few minutes I can convey that I'm just like anyone else.
But I still feel quite conscious of it when I'm meeting people (and especially women).
So I have two key issues:
Firstly, I don't want to come across as week by looking disabled within the first few minutes of the game.
And secondly, and perhaps more importantly, I don't want to have to worry about it or what other people are thinking about it. Because this puts me off.
I'm thinking the best solution is to just completely ignore it and act like anyone else would, but I don't know if that's the best solution, so if anyone has any advice, tips or exercises they'd like to share I'd be very grateful to hear them.
08-18-2009, 06:48 PM #2
If it's not a hindrance to you when performing every day tasks then don't treat it as a hindrance when you are with a set! If you do find yourself talking to a girl and you are conscious that she might be wondering what's up, then why not playfully bring it up in conversation. Chances are people aren't going to ask you about it direct because of fears they might offend you (I don't know, I could be wrong?) so it could help them to feel relaxed if they know you are open about it.
Hope I've made sense!
08-19-2009, 06:25 AM #3
Hey Jack! Check out this Best of the Forum thread, I think it'll speak to you
08-19-2009, 10:49 PM #4
Thanks for the reply. Do you have any ideas for ways to bring it up jokingly cause I like that idea but it always seems really awkward.
08-20-2009, 09:27 AM #5
If it's not offensive/distasteful to you (and this isn't meant to be, by any means) you could use a "mutant" theme, like some mutant warrior out of a kid's cartoon.... or that it was the result of a mad scientist's experiment (and you could make up a funny past scenario with that). You could start talking about your hidden superpowers!
Hope that helps a bit.
08-20-2009, 02:06 PM #6
Like AW, I mean no offense, but to provide ideas for levity.
HB: "What's with the arm?"
PUA: "Remember how for Halloween , as a kid, you dressed up as a princess because you saw "Cinderella"?"
HB: "Oh, yeah that was fun." (This puts her in a comfortable state.)
PUA: "Remember how you wore that princess dress all over...all the time...for like a week before Halloween?"
HB: "Sure. I like the attention and being treated like royalty."
PUA: "Well, I wore my costume so much I started taking the shape of the costume. My favorite movie was 'Jurassic Park' and I dressed up as a velociraptor."
08-20-2009, 02:27 PM #7
I'm not taking offence this is cool. I'm asking you guys for jokes about someone (me) that's disabled - which is normally completly socially unaceptable. Ideally I think the line shouldn't be quite as strict so it's more comfortable for myself and whoever I meet. But it's not so I've goto get around it with this stuff which is great.
I think the trick's going to be to throw this piece and then stack cause I don't want to dwel on it too much (as Von_Halen's suggested).
08-20-2009, 03:32 PM #8
08-20-2009, 05:22 PM #9
called disabled bro. I mean playing the guitar! Hell I have two well functioning arms and I suck at playing the guitar.
My best suggestion is to stop feeling conscious and thinking too much about it. I know how you guys feel. It's just like how those HBs feel when they are consistently being told that they are beautiful. They hear it all the time and they are sick of it. I believe this is one of the reason why I always try to know the person inside. Remember that Little Prince quote bro which goes something like... "what is essential is invisible to the eye."
I agree to you that your jokes should make you and others comfortable. Good luck bro!
08-20-2009, 08:08 PM #10
Like Style says
"what you cant fix, you feature"