Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood
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  1. #1
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    I was stuck on being too fixated on "keeping a good vibe". Then I came off as weak and cold approach chicks and stranger guys stopped taking me seriously and respectfully. After that I was too fixated on being dominant that I came off with a vibe of an ax murderer.

    RJ talked about "bullying" as something that repels chicks. So how to I become dominant without bullying?

    Then I started reading some David Shade and he talked about "commanding respect by respecting others". So I was very respectful to people, they respected me back but there was this really boring vibe between us. I read something about being "Happy Dominant" in one of the posts in the VA forum. I knew the theory but the execution of Happy Dominant was tricky for me at first. Then I realized ... wait ... I'm not only supposed to be Dominant just when I'm happy. I'm supposed to be Dominant all the time. So if I'm serious, I'm respectful serious Dominant. If I'm smiling, I'm smiling dominant. If I'm friendly, I'm friendly dominant. If I'm respectful, I'm not respectful weak but I'm respectful dominant.

    But what's the dominant vibe? I came to the conclusion that the dominant vibe is: A slight "intimidation vibe" *embedded inside* the fun vibe or the friendly vibe or the happy vibe or the respectful vibe ..etc. I don't know if that makes sense, but it was an epiphany for me.

    The embedded intimidation inside any vibe I give off says: "Hey we're having a good time. But you better not mess with me". I realized that that was the vibe AMOGs gave off. So I wanted to see what happens if I give that AMOG slight intimidation vibe as well. Turned out people respected me more and I'm getting more IOIs from chicks. I mean just by the way I walk and smile on the street there is this slight intimidation vibe + happy vibe that I give off by just walking. I mean no convo no game nothing. I'm just walking. Its just a state of being

    I'm around my dad a lot lately. And I was being too supplicating around him because ... well ... he's my dad. I was being too conditioned with the supplicating psychology that I got used to that supplication psychology. So I asked myself: "How do I get rid of that supplication psychology?". So now whenever my dad asks me to do something, I give him a soldier yes-sir! attitude instead of a doormat attitude. Or the attitude of a dude hired for a mafia crime job that says a confident "yeah I know what I'm doing and I'll get it done so don't insult my professionalism" kinda vibe. The supplicating weak psychology I had is now gone.

    This is what girls mean when they say "I want a real man!". They want someone who commands respect with a slight intimidation vibe embedded inside every other vibe he gives off. I don't think its like Joe Pesci in "Good Fellas". Because Joe Pesci doesn't have a *slight* intimidation. He has a very SCARY intimidation that scares people away from hanging out with him. So the intimidation has to be slight.

    Manhood is dominance. So I asked: what's the perfect analogy for dominance? Then I came to the conclusion that being dominant is exactly like "Being like your boss when he's in a good mood".

    What do you guys think? Is this conclusion accurate or I'm I gonna fall for another inner game misconception trap?


  2. #2
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    I like it and I think you're on to something.
    One good way to practice this type of thing is to be constantly winning what I like to call "eye wars." Every time you make eye contact with someone throughout the day, try to make them be the first one to break it. You'll notice a lot of body language subtlities. For example, omega males will instantly look down when you make eye contace with them. Beta males will hold a little longer than omegas and will sometimes look to the side instead of down.

    For AMOGs, you need to add a small greeting gesture to communicate that you are not trying to start a fight. Here's an example of how to win an eye war with an AMOG; make eye contact, if he holds, give a slight nod. If your body language is correct he will usually look away...if not you might have to concede as to not start a fight, but it's great for calibration. You'll notice that the better your bodylanguage is, the more AMOGs will concede. Good luck!


  3. #3
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    Okay we were once in my friend's place. We wanted to see this TV show that was in his brother's laptop. At first we used to treat his brother like a bitch. When we asked him we wanted the laptop he said "no". We took it from him anyway (All in fun brohood of course). Anyway we were about to see the show but the laptop required a password. We asked the brother for the password. He wouldn't give it to us. We really wanted to see the show. So he told us to do stuff for him like we're his little bitches. We ended up being his little bitches.

    See how the tables were turned there?

    That story made me realize something. That realization is:

    To maintain a dominant power you have to be in the position of a provider or a position of a threat.

    Me and my friend are more people. We outnumber him so we can fuck him up. (Position of a threat)

    He is the only one who has the password. We need it. He's the only one who can provide it to us. (Position of the Provider)

    AMOGs get away with Dominance because they're huge muscular mother fuckers. (Threat)

    When your girl says she doesn't like the song that I'm playing in my car. Tough. Its my car, its my CD. I'm providing her with the transportation that she needs. If she still wants that transportation, she'd better do what *I* want. (Provider)

    In a date, the guy is paying for dinner. (Provider)

    When you move in together, its your place that she moved into. Its your house. Its your rules. (Provider)

    Once, I couldn't understand what this Spaniard person was saying in Spanish. There was this British dude who speaks Spanish standing next to me. I asked if he can translate for me. Anyway he translated but he gave me this attitude that I'm wasting his time or some shit. But I can't straighten him out because he's the only one that can help me with my problem. He's *providing* me with something I need. So he can get away with being dominating and make me feel dominated because he's my provider. So I sucked it up and took his shit like a man and gave him an alpha "Thank You" with a vibe of "Yeah get the fuck out of here I don't need you and your fucking attitude anymore".

    But still, before he translated and while he translated I wasn't allowed to make him feel dominated. I had to make him feel dominating. Because he can easily decide to stop translating making me stuck in that problem again.

    Whenever you want something from someone you're losing dominance. Whenever your *providing* something to someone you're gaining dominance.

    That's why when we approach a girl with fucked up inner game that believes that "SHE has what you want" instead of "YOU have what she wants" ... you supplicate

    But when you believe that YOU have what she wants ... you're dominant.

    Its a state of being

    If you're that guy she reads about in romantic novels. That finally she's gonna meet someone who's not an AFC chode that she's used to being with all the time. That she's finally gonna meet a "Great Guy" and brag about it to all her friends. Then YOU have what she wants... not the other way around ... You're *providing* her with what she wants ... If you're *providing* her with what she wants, then you're *allowed* and you *should* become dominant


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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    just be carefull u 2...when you fuck with the bull you will get the horns

    this can all blow up in your face when you try this..


  5. #5
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    Being dominant is not like being an ax murderer or looking like someone who came out of a prison facility. David Shade says that to make girls enjoy sex in the bedroom, she has to *surrender* to you. So you have to be dominant. If you want her to surrender to you in the bedroom, you have to command respect OUTSIDE the bedroom. He also said if you want to command respect from people you have to *give respect* to people. You can be fun dominant or happy dominant respectfully

    I wondered how people have this High State "woo hoo" conviction in their game. It's like they're kind of high-state-dependent. I feel that conviction creates a cool college boy persona. The "Yeah! High Five! Kick Ass! Woo Hoo!" persona. That college "boy" persona feels like boyhood more than dominant manhood. I don't know that's what I used to feel.

    I wondered can someone be cool-high-state and manhood-dominant that make girls surrender to him in the same time?


    I thought about it. I figured its like the captain of the football team with his peers celebrating a winning match. So yeah you CAN be high-state and dominant at the same time

    While your projecting value (Fun, interesting, cool, laid back, deep, exciting, adventurous, cheerful ... etc.) embed the *slight intimidation vibe* in it.

    Which makes you Fun Dominant, interesting Dominant, cool Dominant, laid back Dominant, deep Dominant, exciting Dominant, adventurous Dominant, cheerful Dominant ... etc. It makes you a *Man* instead of a *Boy*. As Deangelo says "The boy must die"

    Did you ever stand next to someone so cool who you liked and had this feeling that your like his bitch in a weird way? You think he's cool but you wouldn't wanna mess with him. Its because he's smiling but he gives off this slight intimidation vibe

    Its like: Projected Value + Embedded Slight Intimidation (Dominance) = A *Man* who is a "Great Guy" instead of JUST a "Great Guy"

    Slight Intimidation WITHOUT Projecting Value (For instance your not smiling) = Ax murderer (Unattractive)

    So you can't have embedded slight intimidation unless its ... embedded ... that's why its called EMBEDDED slight intiidation. And it has to be embedded in? Yep. It has to be embedded in the value behaviorisms and stories your projecting. If you just have intimidation without embedding it in anything, without embedding it in *positive RESPECTFUL value* your just gonna scare people or make people despise you.

    And notice I'm not encouraging the position of the Threat in my last post. I'm encouraging the position of the Provider. The dominant position of the Provider doesn't have negative or dangerous consequences.

    Also, instead of calling it *the embedded slight intimidation vibe*. We should define the dominant vibe as: *the embedded RESPECTFUL slight intimidation vibe*

    I'm really enjoying these epiphanies as I'm writing this down. Everybody please share more thoughts with me


  6. #6
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    No..really man..this is dangerous

    Ok..not in this point of time..but this is like "lets put it friendly" unqualified Personal that is messing arround with al sorts of chemicals.

    Something's bound to go wrong.

    It's so of track..i dont know where to start ,this is really far-fetched

    im not into flaming but it is like some-one is going for a head on collision..

    i just have to shout ..LOOK OUT DUDE
    p.s only good thing is the smiling and being friendly part ,stick to that and it wil be ok


  7. #7
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    Harvest,

    With all due respect, what in the world are you talking about?

    This is great advice and it IS what the alpha man is. He can be a fun guy to be around, just do not fuck with him because he has the ability to deal with you efficiently and destroy your social value.

    I would agree with you, harvest, if Hero was writing posts on being a hard-ass that never smiles and is 100% intimidation. That's not even fashionable anymore, and it is dangerous.

    Outside of that, I do not see your point. I'm known not to get some obvious things because they skip my attention, so if you could, elaborate on why this is dangerous.

    I just think it is advice that I'd find from Carlos Xuma... Good stuff.


  8. #8
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    Ha ha

    Bro I'm not into flaming too. Its okay to have a discussion man, we're learning from each other

    So what are your thoughts on Dominance?


  9. #9
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    My Thoughts on Dominance

    I had a psychology teacher once tell the class that he was about to write the dirtiest word in the english language on the board. He told us to close our eyes while he wrote it to get the surprise factor. When I opened my eyes, the word on the board was: "CONTROL." He said it was the dirtiest word because we all try to do it but never want to admit it or talk about it. All of our behaviors are done to seek control in a random crazy world.

    Ok, so what? where am I going with this right?

    If everyone in the world is trying to control everyone else and the world around them, then what do I need to be dominant. The answer is the strongest frame. If I have the strongest frame, i suck people into my world and into my beliefs. We create our own social reality and thus our own world. For me it means that if I believe I live in a fantastic fun reality and I am in total control of my world and my awesome cool self, the people i meet and girls i meet too should get sucked into my frame. And if they are in my frame, then I am dominant.

    A more concrete example would be things like cold reading. I'm demonstrating that I know her world better than she does. Because I can do that, that must mean my frame is stronger than hers, because im dictating her actions. I'm taking control.

    Another good example is having that frame that says no matter what she does or says is because she is attracted to you. Eventually if your frame is strong enough she will believe it too. And if she keeps falling into your frame, then POW! that's dominance! That concept was hard for me to understand too, but after a while in field, it really starts to make sense. Controlling the frame is all about congruence and calibration. And that means I just gotta go out there in field and keep getting into more interactions.

    I read a great quote somewhere. It says something on the lines of "Experience is a tough but great teacher because the tests come first and the lessons come after."


  10. #10
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    Dominance: Being like your Boss when he's in a good mood

    I agree, frame is important. But:

    I think a strong frame is making the other person believe what you believe.

    I think dominance is what makes a girl feel "Surrender" to you. I think its more of a feeling-alternation than a belief-alternation.

    Frame is about persuasion. Dominance is not persuasion, dominance is reminding the girl who's in charge. Dominance is being authoritative more than being persuasive. But you have a right to be authoritative because:

    1)She likes it

    2) You're a provider for what she needs, so she has to respect you

    You don't have a right to be a bully. But the thing she needs from you belongs to you. If she wants it she has to show you some respect. And being dominant is reminding her not to disrespect you if she wants that thing she needs from you.

    Maybe frame has something to do with it. In fact frame is crucial. But its not only a "persuasive" frame. There's also an authoritative frame that exists as well


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