After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending - Page 2
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  1. #11
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Interesting azazels...

    Hmmmm, I have a hard time just being friends with a girl if I really like her. If she breaks up with you, why would you want her to hang around? It will just remind you of how things were and of what you don't have anymore.

    Anyway, I digress, we're off topic a bit now


  2. #12
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Think of it this way, and I know its easier said than done, but your ex is not fucking you, not increasing your chances of getting fucked, so why let her negatively influence you in anyway?


  3. #13
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Quote Originally Posted by irelad
    If she breaks up with you, why would you want her to hang around? It will just remind you of how things were and of what you don't have anymore.
    But should you allow that to create resentment or pain within you, if she happens to still be able to treat you respectfully as a friend after the breakup, and still cares about you enough to want to keep you in HER life?

    If, under those circumstances, you wouldn't want her in your life because she doesn't sleep with you, then perhaps you were depending upon sex for validation, or didn't really care for her other qualities as a person?


  4. #14
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    remember, if someone really meant something to you, then you would want them to be happy.

    there's no need to pretend, of course your gonna be hurt! but remember, those feelings are gonna lessen as time goes and your gonna be stronger inside for it.

    remember, you deserve to be happy and have good things in your life. just be grateful for the time, and send positive thoughts her way. I understand Agape, its gonna hurt for a while.


  5. #15
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Quote Originally Posted by azazels_wolf View Post
    If, under those circumstances, you wouldn't want her in your life because she doesn't sleep with you, then perhaps you were depending upon sex for validation, or didn't really care for her other qualities as a person?
    Bingo. This.


  6. #16
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting your HB back. I say try to win her back. If you fail, leave it. Listen, if every guy I was involved in didn't try to win me back, then I would have forgotten them. I've had guys win me back, and I enjoyed the effort they took to realize they "fucked" up. This shows you care sometimes, despite what the PUA community says to leave it. I say give it a go.


  7. #17
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Quote Originally Posted by Amber Nectar View Post
    I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting your HB back. I say try to win her back. If you fail, leave it. Listen, if every guy I was involved in didn't try to win me back, then I would have forgotten them. I've had guys win me back, and I enjoyed the effort they took to realize they "fucked" up. This shows you care sometimes, despite what the PUA community says to leave it. I say give it a go.
    C'mon, AN, be nice to the guy, we don't want dude goin' overboard with winning someone over.




  8. #18
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Oh Hydro......me (shaking my head)...it's ok for guys to work at trying to win back their love.


  9. #19
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    lol, what if she already found another guy already a month after the breakup


  10. #20
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    After breakups - Be hurt and Angry Vs Pretending

    Quote Originally Posted by Agape View Post
    I have a real hard time with pretending that nothing bothers me to a girl I broke up with. Some say it is a way of showing you didn't really care whatsoever and make her feel like she isn't that important anyways for dumping you. However, some say ignoring the fuck out of her will make her reflect more and realize her loss. Suggestions and I don't want to hear the old, "fuck it, go fuck some more chicks" because we know that doesn't reallllllllllllllly work. It helps but doesn't cure.
    Agape

    dont resist what youre feeling. if youre sad, cry. cry for a few days if you have to. if youre pissed off, go break something. dont worry about her and making her feel this and that, just concentrate on not resisting what youre feeling. that will get all the emotion out of you and let you assess the situation more objectively. which needs to happen before you can decide what you need to do.
    if you were just seeing her for a few weeks, just cry it out, learn what you did wrong (get too emotionally attached too early) get on with your life. if youre both cool enough about it, you can still be friends, then go forward from there if necessary.
    if youve been in at least a semi-serious relationship with her, then either youll realise that she left you because you two were legitimately not compatible for a relationship and youre better off apart, or any number of other reasons, of which only youll know for sure which is true. from there you decide if you try to get back together with her (not "win her back") or come to terms with the reality that youre better off apart, if only for the reason that she'll be happier this way. and that should be reason enough.
    but dont make any decisions until youre not all emotional anymore...


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