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  • First Field Report, Please Critique

    So heres a little bit about myself. Im 20 years old, 5'9, 320lbs but Im very solid for that weight. I do MMA and the Worlds Strongest Man stuff ontop of school, work . Even though I've always been able to open up sets the friend zone was always inevitable for me. I was the big teddy bear nice guy. Now I've made the resolution to actually start enhancing my romantic life. Last night really changed my out look on somethings for the good.

    Went to a college party w/ a buddy of mine and he introduced me to two girls, both HB 8.5 Now, heres something I admit. Ive have had a significantly large number of partners in the past but all have been way below my level...I aim low because its easy, not much work, and the chance for rejection diminishes. Now, the 8.5 I was speaking to right off the bat started kino-escalating. Touching my hand frequently. Then she began asking me about what I do and this and that. When she would get up to go to the bathroom or some other guy would come over and start talking I'd go off w/ my buddy and open up another set to the best I could. So its off and on talk all night and shes slowly qualifying herself. I go to get a water and her, my buddy, his intended partner are gone. The old me would of chased her and tried to prove my nice guy ness but I said hey, this is a party and I have options so I opened up this blond girl and she immediately started giving me this shit test which, I didn't expect and I failed at it because I was not ready for it at all.

    Cops begin to ride by the house so I decide to leave. I go down stairs and theirs my friend, his girl, the other HB 8.5, and this other kid who was trying to talk to her all night. As I am leaving the conversation is "Well, if we go out on one date, I can't promise you theirs going to be a next" The kid was hitting on her and she wanted nothing to do with him. I kind of felt bad. THen he said "What do you do to attract women" etc. She explained. Then she grabbed me by the hand and said "Do you know how me and you had that connection all night that we both wanted to see each other again? Thats the kind of connection you have to have with someone to want to date them". My head was spinning. So I take this as an opportunity to build more attraction which we neg, even used the "off button" one which she again ate up. All of this in about the only two minutes I had. But everyone began to go upstairs and she was the last one to go up stairs. She gave me a look and didn't even say good bye. I am a pussy and I fully believe that everything was their that established attraction. I just couldn't number close or go into the C's because I got a little to nervous. However, on the way home, I realized how much it boosted my confidence.

    I have to start aiming for good looking girls. My identity comes off as a really strong manly-man. When I am for low girls and attempt to use a M3 approach or just an approach in general, I often seem over qualified and perhaps intimiddating. Most of the time these girls aren't very high in self esteem so negging them etc isn't always the best thing to do. They think it's "mean" where the HB 8.5 (and just other good looking friends I have) seem to eat it up on a sub conscious level.

    Luckily, this girl seemed into me right from the start. Touching hair, crossing/uncrossing of legs, so just my mere presence was enough social value. However, I don't think I should of been so sporadic through out the night with her. I should of built the attraction and then comfort. But the more girls I talked to and the more I became friendly with the people I didn't know, the more she wanted to talk to me.

    My game right now is only opener deep. After the opener, if the response isn't what I look for, I kind of freeze up. With the shit test girl it was a very good opener followed by a story etc. I coulnd't do a false time constraint becuase of the area. So my best set opener of the night was blown by a shit test. Awsome lol

    Im still nervous in approaching girls but last night was a confidence booster and me realize im qualified enough for good looking girls on a 7 or higher range. WHy wouldnt I be?

    Damn, thats long. Anyone who reads it thanks alot and any comments/feed back is more then welcomed and needed.


  • #2
    You out of all people shouldn't be nervous. I mean, body wise people would look at you totally different, especially if you're saying that you're solid for that weight. So even if you're with a set, guys would even have second thoughts to come approach that set your approaching. In a way, you have the upper hand.

    Now, regarding that party, you had it all set, everything was given to you on a silver plate, literally. She seemed to have shown you that she's somewhat somehow attracted and i would 95% guarantee you that you could've got her number within a split second. Oh well, i've been there, and sometimes I wanna kill myself, but at least now you've learned something.


    • #3
      You did great man. Some good points....

      It is good that you have realized to go for women of your level or higher. You will find when you interact women of a higher level that you naturally gain a higher level.

      Great job on being able to neg the target as well. I find that the most difficult skill to learn. That is something I still need improvement on because I had the raising to always respect women and be the nice guy.

      You also realized you need to open other sets. Some men are not aware to do this but it is essential. This gives you a step-up on the game.

      Another great thing I recognized that might not of caught your intention but you actually are able to read body language. You noticed how the girl was not interested in the guy and what he was doing wrong. Something a lot of people have trouble with is they are not able to tell when a woman is not interested or interested, and that is something you need to be successful with women and life.


      • #4
        Great job, especially being that this is your first field report.


        • #5
          Solid FR man, 5'9 320 and solid, I bet you would break me in half with a glance and I am built myself

          You can always do an FTC; the I am going to get back to my friend's bit is old anyway.

          "I need to get another drink, but check this..."

          "So I got about five minutes before I need to get some fresh air... but ..." <this is a good opportunity to close thread; go back to FTC and bounce target outside if you hook/ you can replace with a "cigarette outside" if smoking isn't taboo where you are>

          "So in lieu of standing in line at the bathroom I'm going to hang out with you <point at target> are you more interesting than a line of drunk dudes?" "I don't buy it/Prove it, you got about 2 minutes before that line clears up" Light neg with FTC or "So in lieu of standing in line I am gonna give it 2 minutes to clear up... <point at obstacle> you look like you know how to party." <turn to target> "You, not so sure."

          You can do more convoluted FTCs too. There was the drink leaving FTC that was posted in the main forum a week or two ago.


          • #6
            hey step at a time. The fresh air thing would be great. You can always go back to it, and say something like " Im thinking some fresh air might do us some good right now" If she bites you can move to C1 ( isolation). The trust test or IOI's etc...could guarantee that works. Not sure on how to combat it if she declines, but im sure someone here has a perfect idea for it lol.


            • #7
              Im still nervous in approaching girls but last night was a confidence booster and me realize im qualified enough for good looking girls on a 7 or higher range. WHy wouldnt I be?
              Perception, that was a gift. I know what's it like because I've been there.

              And just to add to that, from what you described, you totally had her. I don't know if you fully realize that. She was literally throwing herself at you dude. Like when you're in the car driving, and you slow down to let someone get in front of you, and yet they still hesitate. And you're like "geez, I'm slowing down for you and waving you in, WTF, go already!"

              I don't think it was good to neg her on the stairs. She had given you a big SOI, and you punished instead of rewarded her. She basically said "I like you, I want to date you, we both know we have this connection, so just ask me out already. Don't worry, I won't reject you." And you said, "where's your off button."

              You could have easily kissed her right there. Seriously. Don't make it harder than it needs to be. Most girls are not that direct. That's why I say it's a gift. She shifted your reality and showed you what's possible for you. That's awesome.


              • #8
                Thanks everyone for the responses and the feed back. I really appreciate all of it. I may or may not see her again I know she was talking about me after from a friend but theirs a ton of other dudes out their.

                Its weird...before getting into this stuff a few months ago I looked at Fri and Sat nights as the nights to meet girls. Now I look at every night I am out as an opporunity to meet girls. It's great.