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Shreddd
09-30-2007, 05:59 PM
Handshakes. Yes. Handshakes. I must use so many different kinds of things with girls from my childhood...and handshakes are one of them. Not to mention bonding on playful childhood memories is always a good time. If you are teaching a girl something, it totally takes the tension off, and you can touch her without feeling awkward.

Handshake Analysis
If someone gives you a sucky handshake, make them try it again until they get it. It should be firm, not squeezing fingers, and shaken three times. If she can't do it right, just throw her hand off and accuse her of having a sucky handshake. One girl came bolting down the hallway when she saw me again just to shake my hand the right way.

Cool handshakes
Remember them cool handshakes you learned how to do? Make one up with her. Teach her all the cool tricks to shaking hands. Pound, explode, and fizzle is my favorite one. Try hip bumps, backhands, slow punches, etc. She's your new best friend.

Story Time
Back in junior high, I went to a tiny school. They always had the first day full of games, activities, free time, and ice breakers. One of the ice breakers we did was different kinds of silly handshakes. Let me teach them to you. They are really funny. Don't get offended...or you can, whatever, you'll love it anyway.

The Fisherman's Handshake
Go to shake her hand but move you hand past hers to her forearm. Slap each other's forearms. It's supposed to remind them of a flopping fish and puts them in a good mood.

The New Yorker's High Five
This one's tougher. Shake from the jitters in one hand like you are holding a cup of coffee. Go for a high five with the other hand. Miss. Lift your foot up as you are bending over from the momentum of missing the high five. Then shake the other person's foot.

The Farmer's Handshake
Have her fold her hands outwards with her thumbs down as if she is stretching her arms out. Farmers love milk, so milk her thumbs. It's ridiculous. I did this to a girl last night and she put up the biggest bratty attitude for the rest of the night telling everyone I'd milk their thumbs.


Have fun with this stuff. If you can actually pull off the Farmer's Handshake without a giant banter brawl ensuing, then definitely tell me how you did it. Last night was the first time it's ever almost backfired on me. Probably because I didn't warn her it was a handshake and just started milking her thumbs. Yeah...that could do it...

Nine-Leaf Clover
09-30-2007, 06:33 PM
Heh... a routine I've been using for a while involves demonstrating "standard" handshakes.

Standard: You know this one: palm sideways, blah blah.

Politician: Palm of non-shaking hand goes to the back of the other person's shaking hand, "sandwiching" it between your two hands.

Minister: Same as Politician, but touch the elbow or forearm instead of the hand.

Recruiter: Hand goes to the shoulder.

Totally harmless kino, fun and educational for everyone involved. "The further up your arm that left hand goes, the more they want from you."

EDIT: I guess you could demonstrate the Farmer at the tail end of this routine, for the lulz.

illPUA
09-30-2007, 07:19 PM
I had a GREAT response with the "Farmer's handshake' last weekend. The way I did it was as follows:

[negged, DHV'd target, now I am merged with the rest of the set and had to win them over, so I do this...]

Her: I'm from "MiddleOfNowhereTown"
Me: What?! Isn't that like farm land?
Her: Haha... nooo
Me: Hey, speaking of which, did I ever show you the Farmer's handshake?
Her: No??
Me: Well, my friend was from San Diego, do you know what the San Diego handshake is?
Her: No, I'm not from there
Me: Well it goes like this *insert random handshake*
Her: Haha, ok
Me: Yeah, but I'm from NY, so do you know what the NY handshake is?
Her: No, show me
Me: Well in NY everythings fast paced, so its just a quick pound *pound her*
Her: Ha, ok
Me: Yeah, thats all cool, but let me finally show you the Farmers Handshake. Put your thumb up *make her makes a thumbs up motion* Cool, now upsides down... *mover her hands physicallly and turn them upside down, so it is like a thumbs down* ok... anddddd... *milk her thumbs* FARMERS HANDSHAKE!
Her & rest of the set: *BUSTS up laughing*

Shreddd
09-30-2007, 09:10 PM
HAHA, that's great. My target burst into laughter too, then she gave me the "elastic band snap back" because she's a spoiled brat. She told me, "I'm not talking to you." So I threw it right back at her and back turned her, gave her the finger, and started giving her sh*t until she engaged me in conversation. Then she went right back into her "I forgot. I'm not talking to you." After that, she tries to start a conspiracy against me...telling everyone I am going to milk their thumbs. Finally, she gets one guy on each side of her showering her with attention trying to help her get over the thumb milking thing. Also, I had won the guys over and they said they're on my side. She was like a little kid - all pouty. I get up and get distracted. I'm not going to deal with a little brat...that little joke was getting old. Haha, plus I got her number anyway.

Actually she isn't little. She's 6 foot and Italian and a year older than me. She's a 9...an 11 at our school. Still a little brat.