My Journal - matkap

[Matkap]

# NEW CHAPTER #


I was prepared well the day before yesterday. I know what to say word by word. Opener was asking for direction. it was crowded as hell and there were many HBs. but I couldn't open. I fell this.. serious hesitation, fear, adrenaline. My left leg become numb! I feel numbness. My energy goes down and I saw HB s with avarage guys, worse than me, better than me.. Then I hate my whole life. i hate social anxiety. After that, I decided to start from "ZERO". If I will be a pua or at least a social and attractive guy, this will be a great story of from zero to "SUCCESS".

# GOALS:
- Beeing comfortable in every environment and able to talk anyone easily.
- Able to approach anytime, anywhere, anyone and beeing in control.
- Beeing acttractive and alfa guy.
- Beeing respected

# STATE
- I have enough knowledge about pick up.
- Insecurety, hesitation, disciplineless.
- Inexperienced
- Social anxiety
- Living in others reality

#STATE of GAME
- Opening: 0/10 - Social anxiety, AA
- A2 A3... others: 0/10 - Not tested.

[Matkap]

# OBJECTİVE of 1. WEEK #

# PROBLEM:
- Social Anxiety
- Approah Anxiety
- Eye Contact
- To much excitement
Seriousness: Very High

# REASON:
- Inexperienceness
- Thinking of what others though
- "They will think that I am weird"
- "They will be inresponsive"
- "They will snub me" thoughs..

# MOTIVATING MINDSETS:
- You are living for yourself. Forget about others.
- You can't be comfortable without experiencing their bitcyness and snubness.
- It is a must, if you want a better life
- You will get what you have gotten if you won't do that.
- To be good at something, you have to be bad at it first. To be bad at someting, you have to do someting at first.

# Objective:
Approach at least 40 sets without expecions. don't game, just ask for directions. Make eye contact, don't lean in, just make approaching a habbit.

[Matkap]

Quick update
Hi guys, I did 6 approaches yesterday. Just ask for directions to girls. Only 1 of them was friendly and described me the bookstore I asked but she was tall and fat about UG3-4. First HB was alone and waiting for someone. I asked her overshoulder and she was soo shy and said just no. The next one was 3 set with ugly girls I asked them and one of them answered as fast as she can "no!" and grabbed friends hand then gone. Next one just said no. (The bookstore i asked for is the most know store in this city, everyone knows it lol.) Next one said no too. The one said no, but I know there is a bookstore I don't know its name and walked. I changed the opener and the next set is a 2 HB7. I said excuse me is this street xyasdaskdh street? I noticed that when I am saying the word excuse, the blonde one make a huge and fast step like she want to escape me. Then she stopped and said yes and I thanked and gone. lol I am well dressed and have babyface, at least nice blue eyes but people are so inresponsive. I wasn't exception anything but i wish they were more friendly!

Also I was waiting for bus and 1 HB7 and an old women came and old one asked HB about direction. She is a bit low self-esteem and I answered old women's question. Then she ask about the HB's arms. There were lots of razor lines. She told they are tree cuts etc. Then I said
Me: yea sure they look like tree cuts.
HB:laughss
Old women:This is so bad. don't do that again. did you do them because of a boy? etc...
we talked a bit
Me:She is so young, she will learn that *smile*
HB:laughs..

Then I was talkative and told a few stories(which I prepared before) and some funny lines

boom the girl asked me:

HB: am I really look so young? (with a face expression like I she want an approve)
I didn't answer then we talked about tattoos. She had a tattoo and I told her my another DHV story. Then her body language is opened and asked me where i am living.

I saw some IOI as you can see. I can say that I build some attraction just with stories. And I also noticed that, when I am in conversation, I feel no adrenaline, no fear. talkative, funny, smiling etc. The problem is starting an interaction.

Then bus had came I asked HB, I will sit end of the bus, you can come if you come but she sit already and said that here is okay.

I am good when I pass ASD and around friendly people.

[Jack Spades]

All the best Matkap, keep us updated

[Pam]

Good Job. Keep it up.