Rhythm
09-08-2007, 10:38 PM
Ok here goes... This is not advice. This is not a story. This is me trying to develop myself to not become a venturian artist, but a better future me.
I'm writing this after getting home from another great night out, that could have been the best breakfast ever! I'm writing this for my personal progression and for ppl who can relate and might take what I'm about to say into consideration... but really just for me ;)
They say the dancefloor is a 'trap'. Some say it's not really a trap, more like it requires a whole different game. I think that it's a fantastic place (for me) to really enjoy my time in a club with great music! But, everything I've read on the game has been vocal, body language when engaging in conversation, but practically all talking. Because I spend about 80% of my time on the dancefloor and the other 20% just walking around the club, I find that the dancefloor is where I get a lot of attraction. Now hear me out, I mean 'proximity'. I often have good looking girls use proximity when they see me from across the floor. I can dance. I have a good time. I oose energy and positive vibes. But I have an immense inability to dance with or approach an HB - whatever the number! I have made about 3 pathetic advances of interest on the floor tonight and all were (quite fairly) shot down or dismissed. Now I know about the slut shield. I can't possibly expect an HB to surrender her game to the first advance (unless I've done something exceptionaly perfect) so I must break through her shield and make her feel won over.
I sometimes stop and think to myself, "Hang on. I thought the trick was to not show neediness or a direct sign of interest to the target?" But how are you meant to do that on the floor?! Please if someone knows how to dance and freely engage with an HB on the dancefloor, without being able to say a word, and without letting on your (mutual) attraction, I'd LOVE to know...
Mystery has explained that we have this fear of approach hardwired into our brain and it's there for a reason. I can't argue with that. But for fuck sake it's a bitch to deal with it huh?! "So stop being a bitch, and deal with it!" Thanks, Mark. I am.
Among other realisations from tonight and past identical experiences, I have learned these very important things:
1. Like I told my friend in the car on the way back home; how can you expect your life to change and have a woman come into your life eventually, if nothing you do changes. If you haven't had success in the past (at all, none) what makes you think that's going to change if you don't?!
2. No matter how much we want something, in this case a sexy female companion, it doesn't come easy. I studied semiotics a little bit and girls are so used to picking up on the signals of thousands of guys who want in. Of course they can pick up on all the signs we give off and can tell if we are comfortable and natural, or most likely not. I think this is unavoidable. You might be savvy with words and using tried and tested material but how can you use it all if she can see your socially uncomfortable-ass a mile off?
(Again, this is just for me to learn off of, really. To document and improve upon my mental anguish).
2b. I noticed that the whole night, I spent around my friend. Constanly making eye contact with eachother, when I'm not, I'm looking all around the room, every direction, occasionally letting my glances seen by HBs. We are so insecure that if one of us goes to the bathroom/bar, the other feels very uncomfortable and 'lost'. So if what point 2 is true:
"If we are socially uncomfortable. How can we expect to greet a guy at the bar, never mind an HB with a finely tuned, calibrated radar?!"
So I end this with a method of improvement, that I MUST do... Go out into the field and no matter what shit I get dealt, I must gain experience, I will learn, I will adapt, I will begin to feel natural and comfortable. I will calibrate! Fuck it, I'll ask ppl to reject me just so I can get used to that too!
Wow, thanks for reading it all (or skipping down), I appreciate that :)
The sun's coming up now, it's daylight. I've got a big day of making an ass of myself ahead! Woo!! Will document further...
I'm writing this after getting home from another great night out, that could have been the best breakfast ever! I'm writing this for my personal progression and for ppl who can relate and might take what I'm about to say into consideration... but really just for me ;)
They say the dancefloor is a 'trap'. Some say it's not really a trap, more like it requires a whole different game. I think that it's a fantastic place (for me) to really enjoy my time in a club with great music! But, everything I've read on the game has been vocal, body language when engaging in conversation, but practically all talking. Because I spend about 80% of my time on the dancefloor and the other 20% just walking around the club, I find that the dancefloor is where I get a lot of attraction. Now hear me out, I mean 'proximity'. I often have good looking girls use proximity when they see me from across the floor. I can dance. I have a good time. I oose energy and positive vibes. But I have an immense inability to dance with or approach an HB - whatever the number! I have made about 3 pathetic advances of interest on the floor tonight and all were (quite fairly) shot down or dismissed. Now I know about the slut shield. I can't possibly expect an HB to surrender her game to the first advance (unless I've done something exceptionaly perfect) so I must break through her shield and make her feel won over.
I sometimes stop and think to myself, "Hang on. I thought the trick was to not show neediness or a direct sign of interest to the target?" But how are you meant to do that on the floor?! Please if someone knows how to dance and freely engage with an HB on the dancefloor, without being able to say a word, and without letting on your (mutual) attraction, I'd LOVE to know...
Mystery has explained that we have this fear of approach hardwired into our brain and it's there for a reason. I can't argue with that. But for fuck sake it's a bitch to deal with it huh?! "So stop being a bitch, and deal with it!" Thanks, Mark. I am.
Among other realisations from tonight and past identical experiences, I have learned these very important things:
1. Like I told my friend in the car on the way back home; how can you expect your life to change and have a woman come into your life eventually, if nothing you do changes. If you haven't had success in the past (at all, none) what makes you think that's going to change if you don't?!
2. No matter how much we want something, in this case a sexy female companion, it doesn't come easy. I studied semiotics a little bit and girls are so used to picking up on the signals of thousands of guys who want in. Of course they can pick up on all the signs we give off and can tell if we are comfortable and natural, or most likely not. I think this is unavoidable. You might be savvy with words and using tried and tested material but how can you use it all if she can see your socially uncomfortable-ass a mile off?
(Again, this is just for me to learn off of, really. To document and improve upon my mental anguish).
2b. I noticed that the whole night, I spent around my friend. Constanly making eye contact with eachother, when I'm not, I'm looking all around the room, every direction, occasionally letting my glances seen by HBs. We are so insecure that if one of us goes to the bathroom/bar, the other feels very uncomfortable and 'lost'. So if what point 2 is true:
"If we are socially uncomfortable. How can we expect to greet a guy at the bar, never mind an HB with a finely tuned, calibrated radar?!"
So I end this with a method of improvement, that I MUST do... Go out into the field and no matter what shit I get dealt, I must gain experience, I will learn, I will adapt, I will begin to feel natural and comfortable. I will calibrate! Fuck it, I'll ask ppl to reject me just so I can get used to that too!
Wow, thanks for reading it all (or skipping down), I appreciate that :)
The sun's coming up now, it's daylight. I've got a big day of making an ass of myself ahead! Woo!! Will document further...