BF Destroyer Lines/Speeches

[The Magic Man]

Here are some good comebacks for the dreaded boyfriend speech/line. Credit to a variety of sources (mostly Zan, Style, Ross J, and Sin – the old ASF Sin, not the MM Sinn), but all field tested by myself If you have any more, list them here.

HB: “I have a boyfriend.”

Possible responses:
“Great, that’ll give you something to do when I’m not around.”
“Oh I guess we’ll have to be extra careful when he have our secret trysts.”
“I have one too. I bet mine’s cuter.”
“Cool I have a girlfriend too…[girls asks for her name]… depends which night of the week it is.”
“Well you’re not married, are you?.... Well then I don’t see what the problem is.” [not as good the other ones, let’s her keep the frame, but always gets a laugh out of her]


If these responses only get you so far, and she still keeps bringing up the boyfriend she loves, then there are a few possible strategies:

1) Tell her that you have stripper friend who tells all her customers that she’s engaged, and that you approve of it.

2) BF Destroyer Game:

Me: “Let’s play a game. Put your hand on your nose if the person or thing I mention means a lot to you, and hold your hand at full length away from your nose if the person or thing doesn’t.”
HB: “Ok ready.”
Me: “First, your job. How close is that to you?”
She usually holds her hand pretty far away from her nose.
Me: “Ok, next how close is your boyfriend to you?”
She usually holds her hand close to her nose, but not touching.
Me: “Finally, how close is your family to you?”
She usually puts her hand right on her nose.
Me: “Now what if someone were to offer you a job that was this close to you? [hold your hand against her nose]. Would you take it?”
HB: “Yes.”
Me: “Now what if you were to meet a guy who was right here?” [put your hand on your nose, wait as her last answer “yes” will kick in and she’ll want to leave him]

You’ll literally see the boyfriend be destroyed in her mind as her brain kicks into full gear and she considers for a second that there are better options out there, and one of them might be standing right in front of her.

If the game doesn’t really work it means that you didn’t generate enough attraction. Or it could be that she really does love her boyfriend. One time when I tried this she did put her hand on her nose (and I knew that she really was smitten with her bf from previous information I received on her), but then I could see the wheels churn in her head when I got to the last part.

3) Passion/Letting Go Routine
(I know patterns aren’t really that popular anymore, but this one’s good for the situation)

“Do you know what passion is? It’s from the Latin root word for ‘abandonment’. It means giving oneself up, abandonment. It’s giving yourself up in something, whether it’s for a guy, a sport, art, or even just for a moment. And only then, after you truly trust yourself to let go of yourself, can you find the things that truly fulfill you in life – love, learning, and most importantly yourself.”

[Pipedreamz]

I think that 2nd one with the nose pointing game seems pretty golden.

I dont get why you would put your hand on your own nose though in the last part, wouldn't that be far away from her nose/ whats important to her?

[DateDemon]

Great advice, I personally will usually act like it is awesome she has a boyfriend. I usually act like he must be the most amazing superhuman guy ever like me to have a girl like her. No matter who he is he will not be as great as the superhuman guy I supposedly picture him as and she will realize hes not that great. Not only that but I compared myself to this superhuman ideal which raises my status a bit.

*optional* Then be like I guess it has been a little while since I have had a girlfriend I love seeing whats out there trying new things, I couldn't eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches my whole life or whatever you want to say.

Then talk about how great it is she has someone to hook up with passionately and how it would be nice to have a steady girl to makeout with and how you would kiss down her neck and down her collar bone and whatever just make a really sexual story about what you would do to *her* I mean your hypothetical girl. You will completely blow her man out of the water. That with a bit of kino and you are golden

[The Magic Man]

I dont get why you would put your hand on your own nose though in the last part, wouldn't that be far away from her nose/ whats important to her?

It's symbolic of her putting her finger on her own nose, as in "what if you could find a bf who was super close to your heart?" But you could also put the finger on her nose, either way just as long as your showing that it's a better, closer bf than her current one.

[DateDemon]

and also the point of that is if you put it on your nose and she agrees she just subconsciously pictured you as better. you are basically pointing to yourself and putting you in that mental position

[predurabo]

I have read allot of stuff on this board most ok and quite a bit just foolish. But that post was just pure gold.

[Pipedreamz]

and also the point of that is if you put it on your nose and she agrees she just subconsciously pictured you as better. you are basically pointing to yourself and putting you in that mental position

Yeah I understood that part. Thanks for explaining the symbolism part. I was probably way too tired when I was reading it the first time.

[Pagoda]

The Magic Man, what happens if you ask her what "Ok, next how close is your boyfriend to you?” and she places her finger on her nose? What am i to do then? One thing, if i'm asking this “Now what if you were to meet a guy who was right here?” , if i use erm, my right hand's finger to touch her nose, while at the same time using my left hand's finger to touch my nose, would that be better? And by the way, this shit sounds awesome, im going to try it out soon =D

[Decibel]

Magic Man has some brilliant posts. If she touches her nose, it's gonna be hard to seduce her. BF destroying techniques generally don't work (per TD) if the girl is happy in all areas of her relationship.

[BishopDon]

if the girl is perfectly happy (which a lot of them aren't) then BF destroying stuff won't be effective.
If the girl isn't happy then it will. Just make sure (And I tell a lot of guys this) that the boyfriend isn't a nutcase. I hate a friend end up in the hospital after messing around with a girl who became hooked on him. She never said her boyfriend was 6'6 260 pounds and had a really violent temper. Sometimes it just isn't worth it. Be smart and safe first and foremost.

[Marc-Antony]

Ok, I am not an expert, but, here is the deal, wouldn't it be better to first ask her about her family, before asking about her boyfriend.

Here is why:

classic scenario:

How close is your boyfriend: she touches her nose.
How close is yoru family: she touches her nose.

And, the last part of your gig, is seriously compromised, you are not screwed, but wouldn't it be better, if she didn't touch her nose.

Now, if you put it the other way around, you are sure that she is going to put some perspective, and that the slightest hesitation is going to not make her touch her nose, when asked about her boyfriend. So, you are double (that little gig/and she is unconsiously comparing him to her family) destroying her boyfriend, because, unless she is ready to marry him, he is never gonna be a match to her family.

So I say:

How close is your family:
then the boyfriend.

It's a lot more vicious.

[Krucial.]

How would you BF destroy if the BF is with her at a party or somthin?

[ninjamunky]

Yeah, what happens if she places her hand on her nose on the cue of "boyfriend"??

[azazels_wolf]

That means that she's very close to him and satisfied with the relationship. Which means it will be very difficult to split them up.

Not Impossible...but it could also make it that much harder on HER if you do succeed, because she's not ready to give him up.

[eZy]

Heres one I thought up:
HB: 'I have a boyfriend blah blah'
PUA: 'Is he a good cook?'
Yes - 'Good maybe he can cook dinner for us sometime?'
No - 'Whos going to cook for us when we go out then?'

[Deus]

What about you ask in this order?
- School/job (far)
- Trust (very close. If it isn't tease her a bit "So you don't mind if I was lying through my teeth?")
- Boyfriend (if this is closer than trust, say "So, your boyfriend is more important than trust? So if he cheated on you, you'd have no problem?" Problem solved.)
- Family (very close)
- Then a guy who is very close

[That1Guy]

what if she sais "What is Wrong with you" to “Great, that’ll give you something to do when I’m not around.”

[azazels_wolf]

Treat it like a shit test.

[That1Guy]

haha yea but what do i say to that XD thats where im stuck :/

[azazels_wolf]

One way would be to reframe with another of the bf destroyer lines and then negging her for "bad behavior."

You: “Great, that’ll give you something to do when I’m not around.”
Her: "What is Wrong with you"
You: “Oh I guess we’ll have to be extra careful when we have our secret trysts. Are you always this unfriendly?"
*stack and DHV*

[WANine]

:lol: some of you guys are idiots.

If she says "what is wrong with you?" it's because she thinks you're being a tool for ignoring the heavy hints she's dropping that she's not interested in you. Not everything is a shit-test.

And trying to pick up a girl by using bf-destroyers at a party that her boyfriend is also at, is asking for trouble. Infact, if you used bf-destroyers on her while her bf was there, you probably deserve to get your ass kicked for being so stupid.

[azazels_wolf]

:lol: some of you guys are idiots.

If she says "what is wrong with you?" it's because she thinks you're being a tool for ignoring the heavy hints she's dropping that she's not interested in you. Not everything is a shit-test.


And some people jump to conclusions far too quickly.

It was implied here that she's ALREADY GIVEN YOU IOI's. Why would you run a bf destroyer on a girl who you haven't even gotten IOIs from???

[WANine]

And some people jump to conclusions far too quickly.

It was implied here that she's ALREADY GIVEN YOU IOI's. Why would you run a bf destroyer on a girl who you haven't even gotten IOIs from???

Uh no. IOI's don't always mean a girl is interested. For example just because the girl

1. Smiles at you
2. Makes eye contact
3. Tosses her hair
4. Flirts with you

it doesn't mean she's interested. Some girls just like to flirt. If you act on those "IOI"'s, and she turns you down, it's a good indicator that she's not genuinely interested (especially if she has a bf) and not that she's trying to shit-test you. You'll learn that soon enough buddy.

[azazels_wolf]

Uh no. IOI's don't always mean a girl is interested.
......
Some girls just like to flirt.

No kidding. That's what A3/qualification and compliance testing is for, not a bf destroyer! No one said to use a bf destroyer to find out if she's interested, or to use it before she's jumping through any other hoops.

Just because she says she has a bf doesn't automatically mean she wouldn't consider you as a partner. If a girl is not completely satisfied and happy with her relationship, she will often consider a man who demonstrates higher value than her bf. Don't give up so easily.

[WANine]

No kidding. That's what A3/qualification and compliance testing is for, not a bf destroyer! No one said to use a bf destroyer to find out if she's interested, or to use it before she's jumping through any other hoops.

You use bf destroyers within A1 - A3. You don't use them in C# or S# (lol) because in order to be in either of those two, you must first have attracted her, and if you've attracted her you can assume the bf isn't an obstacle anymore.

90% of the time, a girl will mention her boyfriend in A1 - A3. The reason being that you are trying to attract her and she doesn't take kindly to your attraction attempts. Kino, roleplaying, etc are all initated in A#, and that's when a girl will interject about her bf. If you're running into girls who you need to use destroyers on, within the C#'s, than you're doing something wrong (probably coming off as gay or as a friend and not actually attracting the girl).

Just because she says she has a bf doesn't automatically mean she wouldn't consider you as a partner.

Again, this is a given. But bf destroyers aren't meant to be used when a girl is interested in you despite the fact that she has a bf... they're to be used when the girl doesn't want anything to do with you sexually because her bf is very important to you.

Try not to overthink it :P

[azazels_wolf]

...you must first have attracted her, and if you've attracted her you can assume the bf isn't an obstacle anymore.

That's an erroneous assumption. Many women are attracted to other guys while already in a relationship. She wants to explore other options, but she feels a sense of commitment or obligation to her bf, or she's afraid of what will happen if she's caught cheating. Many women are in a relationship that is comfortable and convenient but not very inspiring or enjoyable anymore. There are plenty of stories on this board alone about women who are highly attracted to a PUA but have a bit of reservation due to already being in a relationship. If this relationship is not a good one, a bf destroyer can be a useful technique.


90% of the time, a girl will mention her boyfriend in A1 - A3. The reason being that you are trying to attract her and she doesn't take kindly to your attraction attempts. Kino, roleplaying, etc are all initated in A#, and that's when a girl will interject about her bf.


So what's the problem? If she brings up her bf in A2, you're not hitting on her! You're showing active disinterest, not revealing that you're attracted to HER, and shouldn't care one way or the other if she has a bf. But you DO need to reframe or ignore her shit tests. You DO want to get her attracted to you while she's thinking that you're not interested in her. And you DO want to demonstrate higher value than her bf and make him seem less desirable in comparison.

However, if your A2 attraction material isn't working, that should be your first concern, not a bf destroyer. "Attraction is not a choice."


If you're running into girls who you need to use destroyers on, within the C#'s, than you're doing something wrong (probably coming off as gay or as a friend and not actually attracting the girl).


Not if she already qualified herself! If she's swept off her feet, maybe she doesn't WANT to tell you until you're in comfort.


Again, this is a given. But bf destroyers aren't meant to be used when a girl is interested in you despite the fact that she has a bf... they're to be used when the girl doesn't want anything to do with you sexually because her bf is very important to you.

Try not to overthink it :P

Actually, I think YOU'RE overthinking it. Boyfriend destroyers are meant to make the bf seem less desireable and attractive than you. And boyfriend destroyers are meant to make her see that her relationship wasn't as good or as important as she thought it was.

[WANine]

I'm not going to reply to that entire novel you just banged out, but I'll give you a short response ;)

You're confusing physical attraction with actual attraction. You can think someone is attractive without actually being attracted to them... so to say... But does that mean that you necessarily want to act on it? Absolutely not. The girls who will act on it are the girls you don't have to use bf destroyers on. The girls who you do need to use bf destroyers on are the ones who have communicated that they aren't interested in you BECAUSE they have a bf (or because your game is weak and their using the bf card as an excuse but I'll assume this isn't happening for the sake of argument) or because they like their bf more than you.

Don't read too far into this... it's mostly logic and common sense.

Girl w/ bf who is attracted to you + bf destroyer = success

Girl w/ bf who isn't attracted to you + bf destroyer = you look like a douche to the girl

[azazels_wolf]

You're confusing physical attraction with actual attraction


Nope, I didn't say anything about physical attraction. Looks are not the issue here.


You can think someone is attractive without actually being attracted to them...


So if you THINK someone is attractive, you're not necessarily attracted to them? Hrmmm.... speaking of logic, that's a bit lacking in it.


But does that mean that you necessarily want to act on it? Absolutely not.


Not necessarily. But haven't you ever been convinced to do something that you didn't want to at first, because you changed your mind? That's what bf destroyers are for. They change her mind.


The girls who will act on it are the girls you don't have to use bf destroyers on. The girls who you do need to use bf destroyers on are the ones who have communicated that they aren't interested in you BECAUSE they have a bf (or because your game is weak and their using the bf card as an excuse but I'll assume this isn't happening for the sake of argument) or because they like their bf more than you.


Just because they say they have a bf doesn't mean they aren't interested in you. Just because they like their bf more than you doesn't mean they aren't interested in you. You MAKE them more interested in you by flipping attraction switches, and you decrease their interest in their bf by using a bf destroyer.


Girl w/ bf who is attracted to you + bf destroyer = success

Girl w/ bf who isn't attracted to you + bf destroyer = you look like a douche to the girl

This is true. But the issue is, why ISN'T she attracted to you? Maybe your A2 is lacking and you didn't properly flip her attraction switches. "Attraction is not a choice."

If you run A2 properly, the second circumstance should be a rare one.


Don't read too far into this... it's mostly logic and common sense.


Your antagonistic attitude isn't logic and common sense.
Throwing insults such as "idiot" to ruin a good thread also isn't using much common sense - it's an indication of insecurity.

Try working on your inner game until you don't feel the need to boost your ego by putting others down. ;)

[WANine]

Man you know that you rely too heavily on the MM persona when you believe that one person calling another an idiot is a sign of insecurity. Maybe... just maybe... when one person calls another person an idiot, it's because they actually are idiots? This seems crazy, I know, especially because all the e-books and videos and whatever you've collected over the half a year that you've been a member of this forum, have told you that a good way to AMOG when someone insults you is to say that insults are signs of insecurity. I know you're trying to "reframe" this thread, and you're trying to appear alpha (it really doesn't matter on an internet forum btw), but just let it go. You're missing my points and justifying your responses by redefiniing my terms in very vague ways, which does nothing but make you look dumb for not understanding basic concepts like the difference between attraction, and being attracted to someone. For example, when I said:

"You can think someone is attractive without actually being attracted to them..."

and you said,

"So if you THINK someone is attractive, you're not necessarily attracted to them? Hrmmm.... speaking of logic, that's a bit lacking in it."

haha there's no lack of logic in my statement.. just an inability to comprehend the difference between two terms on your part.

You completely misunderstood what I was saying (though I don't know how you managed to do this, but you did). To put it in laymens terms, you can think someone is good looking (attractive) without wanting to pursue any sort of relationship with them (being attracted to them). If you don't understand the difference between being attracted to someone, and thinking someone is attractive (which your statement would imply) than there's really no point in me posting anything further, as you've proved my point that some of you guys are, infact, idiots :P.

Don't forget to neg me in your next reply so that you reframe the thread and appear AMOG on the internet!!!


lol

[latinguy]

Why bother if she has a boyfriend? You can get killed in some places for messing around with another guy's girl.

Find out how serious the relationship is (ask her when was the last time she saw him). If its serious, move on. There's plenty of single women out there.

[azazels_wolf]

Find out how serious the relationship is (ask her when was the last time she saw him). If its serious, move on. There's plenty of single women out there.

That's the key: Find out about him and how good the relationship is. If she is perfectly happy and satisfied with her relationship, do not attempt to break it up. It will only hurt her. However, if she is unhappy with her relationship, as many women are, then you have a good chance at being able to change her mind, because she already has thought about other men and will be considering her options.

[WANane]

...

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Prophet says: Deleted because it was nothing but bitching about being banned.

For anyone who actually cares, WANine was banned after receiving multiple warnings about his childish and disrespectful behavior on this forum.

We're not heartless Nazis here. Had WANine contacted us and discussed the situation in a respectful and reasonable manner, we could have worked something out. But the fact that he created another account just to come back to try to justify his view that childish name-calling pointless flaming was perfectly acceptable on a forum that promotes mature and rational discussion while at the same time trying to insult the admin team pretty much justifies our decision.