azalin00
05-12-2010, 03:12 AM
My story (about women)
I used to be pretty quiet, not many friends. Got in with a group of stoners. Ever hear that saying that stoners get all the pussy? It's cause they're so laid back, and there's a subset who are the true bad-boys. I worked my way into one of those, but not in a big way. I want to emphasize that while I did alright, I wasn't some super player.
I got a few girlfriends as soon as I got rid of my acne- they seduced me, I was oblivious at that point, sex meant nothing to me. I was 17. I didn't do anything I was aware of to cause this, they just came, one after another, and I had fan girls. I AVOIDED them. It didn't work. They got to me sooner or later...
All this time I NEVER chased a girl (except 1: she got away), and was developing into a bit of a nympho. That being said, don't assume I was some crazy natural, I feel like I was getting lucky.
I broke up with my gf, and went to a party with the "one that got away" hoping to seduce her- but, mostly, just looking for someone to hang out with. You can say all you want about having ulterior motives, but I was OBLIVIOUS about girls except rare cases. I went there just trying to be friendly.
Just trying to be friendly, nice, and talkative- not to mention generous- I shared my liquor with 2 interesting girls I met, talked shyly, I was probably fairly quiet until drawn out. While I was about to get somewhere with the girl I LOVED (attempted suicide a few months before...), THEA walks across the room and asks if she can kiss me.
(Years later, she explained it to me: "My goal was to make out with the hottest guy at the party." I had orange spiked hair (dyed), shorts, and a yellow button up t-shirt with nothing underneath- undone. Hat and sunglasses like Hunter Thompson in Fear and Loathing.)
We made out- because I didn't want to be accused of not being a man. Again, that sounds like bull, but it's true. I didn't want to look lame in front of all these people. She was nice, so we made out, and the girl I liked was... PISSED. I've only ever seen venom like that from a girl a handful of times, I mean VENOM.
Ignoring the venom- it seemed inappropriate, since she didn't like me, right?- I tried to have a good time, ignoring her constant remarks. While the girl who kissed me decided to make out with the girl I loved, which I was literally neutral to- it was fine, I didn't even watch- I got the raver girl I had talked to earlier and basically pulled her in to kiss too.
The rest of the night was a 3 way make out while I rambled about free love and restraining relationships- a rant I believed in fully. Slept in the same bed, but because other people were in the room, no sex- I also didn't care, all I cared about was interesting people, and deep relationships. Connection. Sex meant nothing- it was meaningless to me.
Nothing came of it, I got back together with my ex the next day, who was crying and threatening to kill herself after she found out about the party... I made some friends at least.
I started going to raves; people would walk up to me to say hi, and they'd compliment some odd piece of jewelery on my body, or my hair; they all dressed crazy too, so I made sure to wear interesting clothes after that. It was how these people opened conversations with each other. It identified us as allies and kindred on streets and in school, and when together, it was the starter for every conversation.
Because I took an interest in these ravers, and because my girlfriend was crazy, I started doing crazy things with my hair too. Spikes. Multi-colored. Hair jell was colored, so I could change it nightly.
I shoplifted constantly (until caught with a jacket full of heart-boxers and jeans), avoided the popular kids, shunned society, could lecture on anti-establishmentism (more emotionally than logically).
People's heads would turn in school. I was the ONLY guy to dress like that so openly, except Tom, who was a BAD ASS NATURAL (and schizophrenic, who incidentally was the ex of the girl I loved- I didn't know until a long time after) - and I started loving the attention. I yelled at my teachers- something I've done since elementary school, very dumb- spoke loudly, got suspended, did drugs, and all that nonsense.
We'd hang out at the diner across the street, we'd made friends with the owner. To prevent boredom, and to make up for my friend's lack of initiative, I brought hackey sacks, notepads, and decks of cards everywhere I went. I dealt, and wanted to be a vegas dealer/professional gambler. I learned how my friends cheated, and only cheated using their cheats while playing vs them to make them look bad- they couldn't call me on it cause it was their trick...
So I was the entertainment.
Later on, I visited Ontario and seduced an awesome hippy girl who came to live with me in calgary after. My method was simple: at a group hangout, I wanted to sound cool, so while debating a religious topic, I put forth an opinion I'd kept silent about previously out of shyness.
Later, she came to hang out and I was mostly trying to just be friendly, but while digging deeper, making the conversation more and more engaging and real, get to the really important stuff to both of us. We talked for HOURS, and when she went to sleep on the couch, I used the classiest pickup line EVER:
"I'm gonna sleep on your butt." -Me
"Okay." -Her
It was very awkward, and has never worked since, but I wormed my way up her body and we started making out. Before my roommate woke up for work (she was very into me, we'd been fooling around, though I tried my best not to, I had very low self control), I had her pants down for oral- thankfully we were interrupted, because I learned a lot about how to do it better by the next time I had the chance, a skill that helped me a lot...
(model: sex is psychological. Teasing is better than touch. All mind games, touch is just a catalyst. Also: the clit is important... duh! I was lame! haha)
So the next morning we walked through the rain to the library, played chess, talked awkwardly, and went back to my place. Spoke very little, mostly small talk. Before her mom came to pick her up, I risked a gambit:
"I really like you" I said.
"I like you too" she said.
Thank god for that, because we kissed again, and she left on a GREAT note. she said later that she thought it was going to be a one night thing, and that I didn't really like her, and was hanging out with her out of pity or nice-ness. No real SOIs before that I guess... I can't remember...
We talked on a 3rd day hanging out after that, "Are we going out?" I said. We laughed about the confusion, decided we were.
Slept together partially because we were at a party where she wasn't drinking, so I decided not to either... so she decided to go for it, as she explained later. I was very considerate. We did it in a tent by the fence haha. Not very romantic! Especially with my friend trying to force his way in to get attention cause the "girls were picking on him!"
I kicked him a lot of times getting him out!
Fast forward to clubbing:
Her and I were still together, but we'd just seen the movie Party Monster, and had begun dressing CRAZY, and going clubbing in the most outrageous outfits- weird clubs too, mostly kink events, with performances, and people in crazier outfits we envied- gas masks, tubes, dreads, full get-ups... i cross dressed a little bit too. I acted very gay sometimes, not because I was gay, but because it got such strong responses. I'd come on to guys around girls, they'd either run, or reciprocate, and act ridiculous around girls, who were attentive, though my gf was around.
I won a costume contest for dressing like Brittney Spears... didn't shave my goatee...
We broke up, and I continued clubbing, but in a subdued way, since we fueled each other. I met a can-can dancer who nearly devoured me at the club while wearing a simple brown vest with spikey hair. We made eye contact, and she waved me over in an over-the-shoulder, single-finger, fleeting way I decided to copy later. Conversation was awkward, we were both trying to connect, found some commonalities in Zim and JtHM, I did a cartwheel to illustrate the free-running some guys were doing earlier... and she devoured me. Scratching and everything, she was crazy.
Again, she picked me up.
After her, I ended up going to gay clubs to dance with my lesbian friends. Striking number of single girls there. I'd just dance to have fun, get free drinks from guys, flirt my way past cover charges- acting very gay- get the dj to play songs my gay friend requested...
I had a system of dancing until I felt amazing with a group, and then as I felt better and better, moving off by myself to scope out the room, fishing for eye contact until someone hooked- thanks to the David Spade Eye Contact Experiment. We'd move in half way each, and dance together. Or I'd switch girls here and there, and they'd come back.
The key to dancing is to not care what anyone thinks. Dancing is about personal expression, and the people who look worst are the ones looking around seeing what other people think. The people who look the best are the ones having a great time.
We'd dance, I learned body-language-dance push-pull by, well, pushing her away teasingly (learned from the dancer girl), letting her come back, dipping her, etc... hard to get make outs, but at the end of the night one or more girls would come over and say "I'm actually straight!"
I'd think, gee, really?!
And it was good. I never learned verbal game, I still suck at talking to strangers. BAD. And I'd rarely be in the same state the next day as those nights, so it was weird.
I decided to never ask for her name at first though: reasoning was that I forget her name that early in. And she probably forgets mine. So, introducing so early is dumb. Better to talk about something interesting- like her clothes, if wearing anything noteworthy- which she usually WASN'T.
I thought those girls were lame, they didn't really impress me unless they danced well- and most importantly, were FUN. I just went out to have fun.
Then, as I stopped going out, due to changes in my personal life, something COMPLETELY WEIRD happened to me.
I was single for a whole year.
Then I got a gf for a year; then I was single for a year and a half. Not even a date.
I'd drifted apart from my stoner crowd, into a cpu nerd crowd, never went out anymore, played a lot of games, and worked part time. some short romantic episodes, but fewer and fewer as the years went on.
It was SHOCKING. I had no idea what to do, or what was going on.
I got a brief gf after learning about speed seduction- one of my first verbal seductions, and she sort of came to me because I went to the bar that night in a full black suit, but it was pretty weak.
I was hopeless. I'd lost it. Completely- and I realized later, I'd lost my identity as well, and become a basically anonymous computer nerd, especially since I had few or no deeply held values anymore, and I had been becoming more open minded to normality, and was trying out all sorts of new behaviors and identities. I became a sad person who cared what people thought, and thought that everyone had value, and that life was more than partying and good times; that art wasn't that great; that love was meaningless; and also that I could not get a girl to save my life.
I found pickup at this point, and here I am several months later...
I used to be pretty quiet, not many friends. Got in with a group of stoners. Ever hear that saying that stoners get all the pussy? It's cause they're so laid back, and there's a subset who are the true bad-boys. I worked my way into one of those, but not in a big way. I want to emphasize that while I did alright, I wasn't some super player.
I got a few girlfriends as soon as I got rid of my acne- they seduced me, I was oblivious at that point, sex meant nothing to me. I was 17. I didn't do anything I was aware of to cause this, they just came, one after another, and I had fan girls. I AVOIDED them. It didn't work. They got to me sooner or later...
All this time I NEVER chased a girl (except 1: she got away), and was developing into a bit of a nympho. That being said, don't assume I was some crazy natural, I feel like I was getting lucky.
I broke up with my gf, and went to a party with the "one that got away" hoping to seduce her- but, mostly, just looking for someone to hang out with. You can say all you want about having ulterior motives, but I was OBLIVIOUS about girls except rare cases. I went there just trying to be friendly.
Just trying to be friendly, nice, and talkative- not to mention generous- I shared my liquor with 2 interesting girls I met, talked shyly, I was probably fairly quiet until drawn out. While I was about to get somewhere with the girl I LOVED (attempted suicide a few months before...), THEA walks across the room and asks if she can kiss me.
(Years later, she explained it to me: "My goal was to make out with the hottest guy at the party." I had orange spiked hair (dyed), shorts, and a yellow button up t-shirt with nothing underneath- undone. Hat and sunglasses like Hunter Thompson in Fear and Loathing.)
We made out- because I didn't want to be accused of not being a man. Again, that sounds like bull, but it's true. I didn't want to look lame in front of all these people. She was nice, so we made out, and the girl I liked was... PISSED. I've only ever seen venom like that from a girl a handful of times, I mean VENOM.
Ignoring the venom- it seemed inappropriate, since she didn't like me, right?- I tried to have a good time, ignoring her constant remarks. While the girl who kissed me decided to make out with the girl I loved, which I was literally neutral to- it was fine, I didn't even watch- I got the raver girl I had talked to earlier and basically pulled her in to kiss too.
The rest of the night was a 3 way make out while I rambled about free love and restraining relationships- a rant I believed in fully. Slept in the same bed, but because other people were in the room, no sex- I also didn't care, all I cared about was interesting people, and deep relationships. Connection. Sex meant nothing- it was meaningless to me.
Nothing came of it, I got back together with my ex the next day, who was crying and threatening to kill herself after she found out about the party... I made some friends at least.
I started going to raves; people would walk up to me to say hi, and they'd compliment some odd piece of jewelery on my body, or my hair; they all dressed crazy too, so I made sure to wear interesting clothes after that. It was how these people opened conversations with each other. It identified us as allies and kindred on streets and in school, and when together, it was the starter for every conversation.
Because I took an interest in these ravers, and because my girlfriend was crazy, I started doing crazy things with my hair too. Spikes. Multi-colored. Hair jell was colored, so I could change it nightly.
I shoplifted constantly (until caught with a jacket full of heart-boxers and jeans), avoided the popular kids, shunned society, could lecture on anti-establishmentism (more emotionally than logically).
People's heads would turn in school. I was the ONLY guy to dress like that so openly, except Tom, who was a BAD ASS NATURAL (and schizophrenic, who incidentally was the ex of the girl I loved- I didn't know until a long time after) - and I started loving the attention. I yelled at my teachers- something I've done since elementary school, very dumb- spoke loudly, got suspended, did drugs, and all that nonsense.
We'd hang out at the diner across the street, we'd made friends with the owner. To prevent boredom, and to make up for my friend's lack of initiative, I brought hackey sacks, notepads, and decks of cards everywhere I went. I dealt, and wanted to be a vegas dealer/professional gambler. I learned how my friends cheated, and only cheated using their cheats while playing vs them to make them look bad- they couldn't call me on it cause it was their trick...
So I was the entertainment.
Later on, I visited Ontario and seduced an awesome hippy girl who came to live with me in calgary after. My method was simple: at a group hangout, I wanted to sound cool, so while debating a religious topic, I put forth an opinion I'd kept silent about previously out of shyness.
Later, she came to hang out and I was mostly trying to just be friendly, but while digging deeper, making the conversation more and more engaging and real, get to the really important stuff to both of us. We talked for HOURS, and when she went to sleep on the couch, I used the classiest pickup line EVER:
"I'm gonna sleep on your butt." -Me
"Okay." -Her
It was very awkward, and has never worked since, but I wormed my way up her body and we started making out. Before my roommate woke up for work (she was very into me, we'd been fooling around, though I tried my best not to, I had very low self control), I had her pants down for oral- thankfully we were interrupted, because I learned a lot about how to do it better by the next time I had the chance, a skill that helped me a lot...
(model: sex is psychological. Teasing is better than touch. All mind games, touch is just a catalyst. Also: the clit is important... duh! I was lame! haha)
So the next morning we walked through the rain to the library, played chess, talked awkwardly, and went back to my place. Spoke very little, mostly small talk. Before her mom came to pick her up, I risked a gambit:
"I really like you" I said.
"I like you too" she said.
Thank god for that, because we kissed again, and she left on a GREAT note. she said later that she thought it was going to be a one night thing, and that I didn't really like her, and was hanging out with her out of pity or nice-ness. No real SOIs before that I guess... I can't remember...
We talked on a 3rd day hanging out after that, "Are we going out?" I said. We laughed about the confusion, decided we were.
Slept together partially because we were at a party where she wasn't drinking, so I decided not to either... so she decided to go for it, as she explained later. I was very considerate. We did it in a tent by the fence haha. Not very romantic! Especially with my friend trying to force his way in to get attention cause the "girls were picking on him!"
I kicked him a lot of times getting him out!
Fast forward to clubbing:
Her and I were still together, but we'd just seen the movie Party Monster, and had begun dressing CRAZY, and going clubbing in the most outrageous outfits- weird clubs too, mostly kink events, with performances, and people in crazier outfits we envied- gas masks, tubes, dreads, full get-ups... i cross dressed a little bit too. I acted very gay sometimes, not because I was gay, but because it got such strong responses. I'd come on to guys around girls, they'd either run, or reciprocate, and act ridiculous around girls, who were attentive, though my gf was around.
I won a costume contest for dressing like Brittney Spears... didn't shave my goatee...
We broke up, and I continued clubbing, but in a subdued way, since we fueled each other. I met a can-can dancer who nearly devoured me at the club while wearing a simple brown vest with spikey hair. We made eye contact, and she waved me over in an over-the-shoulder, single-finger, fleeting way I decided to copy later. Conversation was awkward, we were both trying to connect, found some commonalities in Zim and JtHM, I did a cartwheel to illustrate the free-running some guys were doing earlier... and she devoured me. Scratching and everything, she was crazy.
Again, she picked me up.
After her, I ended up going to gay clubs to dance with my lesbian friends. Striking number of single girls there. I'd just dance to have fun, get free drinks from guys, flirt my way past cover charges- acting very gay- get the dj to play songs my gay friend requested...
I had a system of dancing until I felt amazing with a group, and then as I felt better and better, moving off by myself to scope out the room, fishing for eye contact until someone hooked- thanks to the David Spade Eye Contact Experiment. We'd move in half way each, and dance together. Or I'd switch girls here and there, and they'd come back.
The key to dancing is to not care what anyone thinks. Dancing is about personal expression, and the people who look worst are the ones looking around seeing what other people think. The people who look the best are the ones having a great time.
We'd dance, I learned body-language-dance push-pull by, well, pushing her away teasingly (learned from the dancer girl), letting her come back, dipping her, etc... hard to get make outs, but at the end of the night one or more girls would come over and say "I'm actually straight!"
I'd think, gee, really?!
And it was good. I never learned verbal game, I still suck at talking to strangers. BAD. And I'd rarely be in the same state the next day as those nights, so it was weird.
I decided to never ask for her name at first though: reasoning was that I forget her name that early in. And she probably forgets mine. So, introducing so early is dumb. Better to talk about something interesting- like her clothes, if wearing anything noteworthy- which she usually WASN'T.
I thought those girls were lame, they didn't really impress me unless they danced well- and most importantly, were FUN. I just went out to have fun.
Then, as I stopped going out, due to changes in my personal life, something COMPLETELY WEIRD happened to me.
I was single for a whole year.
Then I got a gf for a year; then I was single for a year and a half. Not even a date.
I'd drifted apart from my stoner crowd, into a cpu nerd crowd, never went out anymore, played a lot of games, and worked part time. some short romantic episodes, but fewer and fewer as the years went on.
It was SHOCKING. I had no idea what to do, or what was going on.
I got a brief gf after learning about speed seduction- one of my first verbal seductions, and she sort of came to me because I went to the bar that night in a full black suit, but it was pretty weak.
I was hopeless. I'd lost it. Completely- and I realized later, I'd lost my identity as well, and become a basically anonymous computer nerd, especially since I had few or no deeply held values anymore, and I had been becoming more open minded to normality, and was trying out all sorts of new behaviors and identities. I became a sad person who cared what people thought, and thought that everyone had value, and that life was more than partying and good times; that art wasn't that great; that love was meaningless; and also that I could not get a girl to save my life.
I found pickup at this point, and here I am several months later...