Need Advice; Shouldnt women value good qualities?

[3vo]

Ok,

So this is an ex girlfriend question.

When Im together with someone I dont have the need to go out and party, drinking at clubs and bars. Id rather enjoy that time with my friends and family and the girl im with.

That being said, My ex tells me when we were arguing (it was a while ago) that me being like that doesnt impress her and I relpied that thats who I am Im not trying to impress her, Im trying to respect myself.

Anyway I saw her the other day for something and she said some junk like yuo should be getting out having fun, almost like she looks down on me for not being this guy that needs to get out all of the time.... I dive, read, hang out with frends when I feel like it, study for work, hit the gym etc etc. Ive also been trying to work on becomming financially independent through paying off my debt and trying to invest my money etc etc.

Whats your take on that? Wouldnt women want to be with a stable hard working guy?

[npf87]

From my experience girls do not want a stable guy unless they're looking for marriage. They always SAY that they do, but really they are ATTRACTED to the fearless and fun guy who is well rounded. I also study for work, hit the gym, hang out with friends, and read, BUT I like to get down and party as well. I do both. And saying NO to that whole lifestyle is a turn off for some girls (young/party girls) but won't be a problem to others. However if you take stuff too seriously and aren't looking to have FUN over everything else, most girls won't like that about you. Being fun beats being stable any day. They're not worried about stability until their party days are over with.

[3vo]

From my experience girls do not want a stable guy unless they're looking for marriage. They always SAY that they do, but really they are ATTRACTED to the fearless and fun guy who is well rounded. I also study for work, hit the gym, hang out with friends, and read, BUT I like to get down and party as well. I do both. And saying NO to that whole lifestyle is a turn off for some girls (young/party girls) but won't be a problem to others. However if you take stuff too seriously and aren't looking to have FUN over everything else, most girls won't like that about you. Being fun beats being stable any day. They're not worried about stability until their party days are over with.

Shes weird I guess, Shes got two kids and is going back to school because she needs to support them; I went out a couple nights in a row when we had already broken up and thats when she got upset and told me she was thinking about me with another girl and that bothered her.

We got back together and then broke up again, shes not 100% stable with her emotions and where she is going in life and I guess with her being so serious with school and the kids she maybee just wanted things with us to be fun and not so serious??

Who knows but she aint giving me what I want so I cant be with her now, in the future she needs to grow alot and for me I guess I need to let loose a little more often too.

I wouldnt mind keeping the booty thing going though we had great times in that dept.

[npf87]

Yea man it's always good to have that balance. And the one who puts in less is always the one who has control of the relationship. So keeping the booty thing while NOT getting too attached will make her want you more. You have to decide what exactly it is you want out of her first though.

[Chika]

This is *one* girl. And a party one at that. By no means should this be taken as representative of all women.

[3vo]

Shes definitely a hard one to figure out.....

Every serious topic that we talked about she brought up, moving in, kids, etc etc etc. It was hot and heavy and then cold. She said she was too busy which is why she didnt give me attention/affection; it doesnt take a minute to call someone and let them know you really care and what not.

Shes got two kids and is going to school and with all of the other stuff has left me confused as hell.

Im really guessing she just wanted to have fun, sex, dinners and wanted to feel good about everything without having to put in the time......Shes used to guys with some serious cash doding on her and giving her anything she wants possibly without the connection.

One time she said she wanted to strip for me but wanted me to put out the cash....I refused to pay her LOL and told her I have never had to pay for anything and wouldnt.

Kind of proves how shallow she is because when we have talked she is cold and distant but keeps saying that I can call her whenever but if she doesnt call dont get upset because she is busy and that I should understand. She wants me to want her but doesnt want to put in the effort.

Im winning this one though. Weds she is supposed to come by work to get some of her stuff from me, thats the last time were going to talk unless she calls me, I just dont have the time for weak people in my life.

I wouldnt mind the booty call though, just not any of the other junk.