Sex / Value

[Sheriff]

Credit to TylerDurden for suggesting Atlas Shrugged on his blog (http://realsocialdynamics.blogspot.com/).

The book is, in my estimation, 95% garbage, but with 5% pure gold in it. You can find much more eloquent criticism elsewhere.

My favourite quote so far, which I think is utterly, utterly key, and represents a valuable mindset, the lack of which is virtually a definition of community guys:

On the subject of sexual conquest:

"He does not seek to gain his value, he seeks to express it"

This is by far the simplest, and most profound statement of the right attitude towards game I've heard, ever.

-sheriff

[Dr. Zeus]

Profound. I'm guessing anyone sharing this mindset will be successful in every aspect of life.

[NextLevelUp]

I only made it about a quarter of the way through that book, found it incredibly tedious and find the 'philosophy' laughable. I'll have to give it another go some time.

Somewhat related is something else TD once mentioned. He once spoke about the idea that a lot of us chose our identities when we were growing up and that most of us in the scene chose "low value" identities, identities that other people would not dislike. At some point after developing our skills we have our 'real' value revealed to us and all actions and thoughts pass through this unconscious filter.

This really struck a chord with me in that I recognised that I had chosen amongst others a 'nice guy that everyone likes' (but no one loves?) identity. And I think I had decided a lot of other things about who I am, what I will get and achieve in this life, what I deserve. Who I am day to day, moment to moment.

I remember a few months ago suddenly coming to the realisation that for maybe my entire life I considered myself to be of lower value than the average person, that in my life I will have less than average, wealth, health, relationships and experiences. Recently I also had a quick scan through a book called the Scripts People live by, there was a schockingly familiar chapter about people who decide the Mind is more important than the Body and basically leads to people becoming asocial nerds.

The reason why I think Identity is important because I have found that in my own life even though I have made efforts to improve my health, wealth and relationships at some level I always believed that I was punching above my weight or acting out of character.

It seems that only in hindsight that you can look back and realise how limiting your behaviours and thoughts were. Is there another way? I'm looking into Spiral Dynamics at the moment.

The thing that I've learned and I think other people should consider is that it would be a good idea to create in detail a new identity for yourself. Not just on a grand level, ie Magician, Entrepeneur but in detail. If your identity is one of a person who systematically takes steps to improve himself then the changes will stick, rather than if part of your identity is someone who starts with best intentions but doesn't finish.

I am a person that does the tasks that I set myself.
I am a person who plans his activities and systematically achieves his goals.
I am a person of determination.
I take action all the time.
I enjoy eating nutritious food, I enjoy going to the gym, I enjoy excercise.
I enjoy meeting new woman. I enjoy socialising with new people.
Getting good at PU is easy for me.

etc.

If I did decide that my identity was one of a loser / less than average person then I can also create a better identity. Rockstar / Traveller / Entrepeneur / Philanthropist / Sex Guru

A good example from my own life. When I was 16 I decided realised that I am a good songwriter. This was before I written or anything or could even play an instrument. Now I get people complimenting me on my music all the time.

I'll end by saying that my results in the 2006 were better than ever. So I'm not just mindlessly KJ'ing.