Have you ever...

[Chika]

I want to know from the guys. Have you ever actually cried about rejection in your pre-PUA days? Why did you cry or not cry? Was it because you weren't getting any? Because you felt inadquate in comparison to other men? Because she hurt your feelings? I'm curious.

[MD2020]

I've never actually cried about not getting any, but sometimes I would get so depressed. It seemed that no matter how hard I would try things would never get better. Thats probably the hardest part, putting in the work and getting no pay.

[Sidewinder]

I cried once when I was in my young teenage years. It was the first time I ever caught a girl with another guy during high school. I felt I had been played, lied to, and hurt. Though the girl in question and myself have made peace since, the traumatic experience inspired me to begin pickup. I needed to do something to meet other girls because I clearly needed to better calibrate my interactions with girls.

[npf87]

I've never cried about rejection. For some reason I am only moved to tears out of sadness (ex. my dog dying). But out of frustration or anger or even depression, never cried.

I have, however, experienced extreme mental discomfort from rejection. It was NOT from lack of sex, it was from lack of love. I, like Mystery, just needed to be loved and needed attention from the opposite sex. I was never the type who needed to "get my dick wet" or "get some pussy." Instead I needed a mutual attraction, or acceptance from girls.

It wasn't because a particular girl hurt my feelings, I can get over that quickly. It wasn't because I felt inadequate compared to other men. I know that most males have inflated egos that are fake and fragile. It was because I felt no love from the other side. And I needed it dammit! Still do.

[Prophet]

I never really cried from being rejected, but I used to get incredibly depressed and be unable to stop thinking about how much a particular rejection hurt me. But as npf87 said, it was not from a lack of sex, it was from a lack of love.

[ThePlayBook]

I think every guy that misses or has a rejection will feel the consequences....but with every guy the "damage" is different. Most guys will get back on the horse and get back out there..others will take a turn for a worse. Takes a blow to their confidence, start doubting themselves etc etc.

Seen it where some buddies got rejected, and they totally shift their techniques, shift what girls they go after, all in hopes to correct for a simple mistake. So things did not work out, oh well move on you know.

Ive missed and been shut out in the past but I've never lowered my standards because of it. If anything it should be a learning experience, that's what I chalk it up to.

[Sincerelee]

Th elast time I cried about a relationship was 12/31/07. That was the last night I thought about my wife. That was the loneliest night of my life. We had been seperated for 5 months.

That night was the first NYE that I spent alone since 1992.

I don't know whether I was crying because of the end of the relationship, or from the absolute loneliness. Either way, within a few weeks, I started my path of the PUA. it was that New Year's Eve than I determined to figure out how to meet people, especially women, and have a fun time.

Since then, crying has not been a response to anything relationship related.

Also, I cannot remember the last time I was rejected relationshipwise. I know I did not cry about it.

Life is good.

[Piano]

Wow. Am i the only one here who have shred tears like a little girl?

YEAH, i have cried. I have cried alot. I think the main reason for this is because it can take me a WEEK to fall in love with a girl. A single week. I have cried when being rejected by all past one-itis. I have never cried when being rejected by a girl iv'e just met or a FB.

[Sincerelee]

If a girl rejects me, she is doing me a favor. She's letting me know without further investment that I have not convinced her that we are ready to go where I want to take an interaction. It helps me decide whether to build more value or comfort, or to eject and spend time with someoen else.

What hurts for me is when a woman will drag on yet never let go. The drag on is hurting both of us. The more you let it drag on, the more it hurts you, the more you want revenge for the hurt. Let it go, deal with the hurt of the loss afterward and it will be much easier to deal with.

[Charisma PUA]

Truth be told, I had only cried once.

It was tied strongly due to a mental/emotional breakdown. I was a fresh student of the Mystery Method boot camp, dedicating 4 nights a week to get good at this. After 5 months with little success, I started to get frustrated; I would cuss the method, women, wings...you name it. And it wasn't tied to sex. No - one night stands require no effort; and personally I dislike them. It was the lack of connection with opposite sex.

Bear in mind this was approx 6 months ago, and the reason why I'm sharing this with you is because I took something very important after that night. I broke down in my friend's car after a rough night at a club - where the night started with a harsh rejection from a two set, where the girls gave me the finger and told me to fuck off in the middle of an opinion opener. I tried to shake it off and approach another set, but that one set stuck with me for the rest of the night, causing the other ones to react horribly as well.

After my breakdown (I never released anything emotionally prior to this point. I came from a military lifestyle, serving for three years and grew up in a military family, where it was weakness to show emotion), I realized why I was doing horrible and why I couldn't get a connection. You need to be able to express your emotions. Women use emotions as their main form of communication; if you don't use emotions, you won't see each other on the same playing field. It allows you to articulate, become energetic and passionate, to be playful and exciting.

That breakdown was the best thing that could have happened for my game. And I'm not ashamed to admit that.

- Charisma

[Czech]

I've never cried from rejection, but yes I have cried. I did a lot of crying and cussed out the world when I had to leave my home country and leave the girl I was in love with. I can definitely say she did a lot more crying. I hope I see her again some day.

There's just something about that first love that always makes you think back about them. Sometimes I wonder why I even do pick-up. I was successful with women before. I think it's just the thrill of make it possible to interact with a girl and within 15 minutes make out with her or get her number. It's like a crazy adrenaline rush and confidence booster.

Charisma, you make a good point on emoting though. Sometimes I think I need to re-embrace my sensitive self rather than being alpha all the time.

[L.A. Tripp]

I want to know from the guys. Have you ever actually cried about rejection in your pre-PUA days? Why did you cry or not cry? Was it because you weren't getting any? Because you felt inadquate in comparison to other men? Because she hurt your feelings? I'm curious.

Yep, have cried about rejection, have cried about the loss of love. As was said already, it wasn't really the loss of sex that caused the cry, it was the loss of love. Because, the loss of sex leaves a feeling of frustration. The loss of love leaves a hole. And yes, some guys will cry over rejection, if they haven't found their selves and don't know who they are. If they are looking for external validation to "be someone" then yeah, rejection will cripple them.

So . . . who have you crushed in the past week? LOL


Charisma, you make a good point on emoting though. Sometimes I think I need to re-embrace my sensitive self rather than being alpha all the time.

A part of being alpha IS showing some emotion though. Why did you HAVE to leave your country and the girl you were in love with? Negative feelings from both of those can effect things now too.

[11.9%AFC]

Cried 4 times in my life, to 4 different girls, whom all broke my heart.
Each time I cry, I grow stronger, feel more ambitious and improve my game better and better.
Each time I cry, I cry less. Each time I love again, I love less.

It's those really really painful moments that drove my determination to become a PUA. I think I'd be a total 100%AFC if these girls didn't break my heart and my first love is my only love.

...Good for me :)

[prefamous]

well I guess I am Cry baby becuase I have cried plenty of times over women, been in love and lost a few times, and this was before PUA. But during when I was trying to do the newbie only like a month ago. I went to a bar in las vegas tried to approach several women there, after being told to fuck off by a few sets, and told they weren't interest before delivering my opener. Major Aproach anxiety set in after that, I wasn't in tears, But what got me is the bartender saw me and she was hot but she felt sorry for me, at least that what it seemed like, after that I had to leave. I have been able to get back the horse so to speak

[L.A. Tripp]

well I guess I am Cry baby becuase I have cried plenty of times over women, been in love and lost a few times, and this was before PUA. But during when I was trying to do the newbie only like a month ago. I went to a bar in las vegas tried to approach several women there, after being told to fuck off by a few sets, and told they weren't interest before delivering my opener. Major Aproach anxiety set in after that, I wasn't in tears, But what got me is the bartender saw me and she was hot but she felt sorry for me, at least that what it seemed like, after that I had to leave. I have been able to get back the horse so to speak

Completely understandable . . . just realize . . . that was ONE bar, and those women aren't everywhere every night. Go somewhere else and talk to different women . . . who know NOTHING about you.

[Cochise]

Shit.... have I cried. It was over the first girl I fell in love with. As a sophmore in HS we met and became close friends. She had a BF, but my love grew. I would dream, wish, pray, and just want to be with her. Finally they brokeup and I told her my feelings. She rejected me hard and stopped talking to me.. I cursed God and didnt understand why I was denied what every other fucker got; love. I didnt want to screw this girl, I wanted love; she was 'heaven'. I had just gotten a CD around that time by a group called Iced Earth. They had a song that spoke volumes to me about my plight. I would hear the song and cry myself to sleep everynight for I dont know how long as I sunk to a deep depression. I cant hear the song now without reverting back to my feelings than, and getting teary eyed.

I havent cried since, but I know I am scarred. Here are the lyrics to that song:

Iced Earth - A Question of Heaven

The time is close now, the end is near
My walk through the valley, trails of fear
I feel empty, my penance overdue,
I guess it's too late now to be with you
I'm extremely frightened of what will surely be
I sold myself, the death of me
I know you can't forgive me I know I'm on my own,
I've betrayed you I walk alone

What exactly is the meaning of this
Just pawns in your twisted game
Severe pain for the lie I'm livin'
For a love I never could betray

Question me not say the lord unto thee
You have chosen your own fate and your own destiny
Denied of this life is what you are to be
You have chosen your own fate and your own destiny

Lord I pound my fists at you
Won't you just let me die
Would I not suffer enough
No inner peace no after life

I did what I thought was right
All for the love of my life
I know it's sad but true
Something is very wrong
Condemned to suffer so long
For a love so true

The question that lies within
Is so hard to understand
It still tears at me
And in my dying breath
My heart holds no regrets
I wouldn't change a thing

My spirit begins to rise to the heavenly skies
Just to be shunned away by you
Now all I want is to die, no streets of gold in the sky
And I wash my hands of you

Rising to the heaven's light
Just to plead for death
Just to be denied

I know you can't forgive me
I know I'm on my own
I know that I've betrayed you
You know I walk alone

I walk, I walk the trail of fear
I pound my fists at you
I'm shunned away by you
I wash my hands of you

Why won't you let me die