its so easy when they're not hot

[godsgift87]

i find it so ridiculously easy to talk to girls that are not all that attractive and increasingly difficult the more attractive girls are. i dont think i can get my head around the fact that there are plenty of gorgeous women around me. any suggestions?

[BigJohnson]

Haha, crazy isn't it.. Na there will always be sexual energy coming to you through the more attractive women. Try and use it to energize and motivate you, opposed to letting is cause fear and anxiety.

Or, think of it like this. Imagine gorgeous babes as uggo babes. I mean good looking girls didn't do anything to be so good looking. They were just born that way, how should that amp their value? Frame it as though good looks only give them 20% of their attractiveness, and you require a much deeper display to impress you. At first it's a little difficult but eventually you feel smoother and smoother.

[Stunna]

If your like me (suburban WASP cliche), your raised to develop a fear/anxiety over this wonderful sexual energy we have (because were taught to 'keep a lid on it'). Fear turns to frustration turns to anger turns to oh shit now we're here. The crazy birthbyfire dildo-on-forehead antics are really just meant to get us all to get rid of this engrained fear we are supposed to have about our sexuality. As long as we repress our sexuality, women will fucking scare us. This is where nudist colonies, tantric meditation/sex retreats, dance classes, gay bars, etc come into play because they help us come to terms with our own sexuality. Crazy right.

[-TruTh-]

My sexual energy is insane.

I noticed that any girl I talk to is interested within minutes.

Its because I finally have so many options that it is showing like a tractor beam.

[Stunna]

Thats the damn truth. Wear your smile like you just got friggin blowjob!

[BigJohnson]

lol Exactly. To repress your sexuality is a serrious backtrack.

Your right Stunna that conflict is what creates that fear. The more "in line" a man in with his belief that sexual energy is to by lidded off the more fear and anxiety he generates.

Truth I see what you mean, women can literally feel your healthy sexual energy, and I tell you what they love it.

I can't help but imagine what bra or panties a gorgeous babe is wearing sometimes.. It has me sitting there with a huge smile on my face.

[ThePlayBook]

Look at it like this:


She could be the greatest looking thing all day but be dumb as dirt. Hows your mind take in on that? Would you still be infatuated by a girl with her looks if you cannot even keep a conversation up with her? How can you communicate with a girl that barely understands anything you do? And if talking basics is hard, how would that be when it comes to sex? Think with your mind, not with your dick....

I think you need to retrain your mind to realize whats really important first. Yea she may have a great body/rack/ass but that doesnt mean you'll get to lay your mitty paws on them! Why get your nuts twisted in a knot over some broad that you have not even said a word to yet? Then because your so uptight over some good looking girl you cannot muster up the courage to talk to her because your mind is obsessed with her looks....and still yet progress has not been made yet, but the nerves/fears continue...over what? NOTHING. How about to take into concern those lucious breasts when she has them pressed up against your face? Now its time to be droolin....

What about society/tv/media that implements beautiful looking women all day every day. You do not see ugly women on the news, posing in magazines, or having any other sort of role in a "visible" area. SO if this is the case, why are guys so uptight over talking/approaching women like this, if its so normal for them to appear in day to day life? I've been trying to figure that out since day one, nobody has an answer.

Its always funny to see some chump appear as a mouse in the presence of a descent female because he places her on a pedestal.

[Mike Hawke]

so game the easy ones to get your state up and each and every night you go out sarging, push the envelope.

make sure you are pushing yourself just a little bit outside of your comfort zone and go for at least one that is just a little bit better looking than you think you deserve. What this will do is expand your comfort zone upward until you internalize that you can get the 10's or above.

the more you push this on a regular basis the more you will grow.

[BigJohnson]

Look at it like this:


She could be the greatest looking thing all day but be dumb as dirt. Hows your mind take in on that? Would you still be infatuated by a girl with her looks if you cannot even keep a conversation up with her? How can you communicate with a girl that barely understands anything you do? And if talking basics is hard, how would that be when it comes to sex? Think with your mind, not with your dick....

I think you need to retrain your mind to realize whats really important first. Yea she may have a great body/rack/ass but that doesnt mean you'll get to lay your mitty paws on them! Why get your nuts twisted in a knot over some broad that you have not even said a word to yet? Then because your so uptight over some good looking girl you cannot muster up the courage to talk to her because your mind is obsessed with her looks....and still yet progress has not been made yet, but the nerves/fears continue...over what? NOTHING. How about to take into concern those lucious breasts when she has them pressed up against your face? Now its time to be droolin....

What about society/tv/media that implements beautiful looking women all day every day. You do not see ugly women on the news, posing in magazines, or having any other sort of role in a "visible" area. SO if this is the case, why are guys so uptight over talking/approaching women like this, if its so normal for them to appear in day to day life? I've been trying to figure that out since day one, nobody has an answer.

Its always funny to see some chump appear as a mouse in the presence of a descent female because he places her on a pedestal.

LOL Your emphatic explanation had me laughing! Your right man, its true.

Some very very hot woman think this - "Its ok, I don't have to be all intelligent with this dude, he's just another one! So he has to do all the work, and impress me cos I'm so fine! Even when he does do all the work I still won't respect him cos he's clearly after my looks only!" She hasn't willingly displayed anything aside form her appearance for you to value. So, she is basing her power/source of value on her looks, when your working with a babe with that thought process you just MUST neg her. Plain and simple, now she is forced to hit up plan B, and start validating herself left and right. Now, she works frantically for you as she realizes your after more than her looks, your value climbs above her assumption. Always, always defy her assumption.

Unless, she values you/finds you attractive off the bat, then run with that assumption. :cool:

[Ice 9]

i find it so ridiculously easy to talk to girls that are not all that attractive and increasingly difficult the more attractive girls are. i dont think i can get my head around the fact that there are plenty of gorgeous women around me. any suggestions?

Open an UG and develop rapport with her so that she'll introduce you to her hot friends. Then with the hot friend you've started with some social proof.

[ThePlayBook]

LOL Your emphatic explanation had me laughing! Your right man, its true.


And to think I get ripped on for what I say about these women. Oh your not giving them a chance, oh what kind of girls do you date then? etc.

Stand tall through it all, and give it to them raw....