Safety - what will and won't you do?

[FinesseMG]

Lets please discuss this.

I actually have a big fear of having any sort of one night stands or sex with girls I don't know to be clean from testing. Even though condoms help, I feel that a baby can be dealt with, but once you get a disease you're fucked. So, I'm wondering, am I overthinking it? How is it that Mystery and other mPUAs who have had sex with hundreds of women have not contracted anything? Or have they? Please share your thoughts or knowledge about this. Also:

Do you feel it is OK to get a blowjob without a condom on? If not, do you get flavored condoms for this?

Do you feel it is OK to eat a girl out? If not, what do you use for protection? I read that you can use a cut up condom, a dam, or saran wrap.

Do you feel it is OK to finger? I'm afraid of diseases getting in through the cuticles.

[Sincerelee]

Good questions. Very similar to many of mine. How do you know the girl you are kissing doesn't have an oral STD?

I think being concerned about these things is legitimate, and have the personal feeling that if someone tells me to not worry about it, they are naive, or have an STD and are trying to convince themselves that they aren't doing anything wrong.

If I were to get a BJ from some woman I did not know and she had not been checked thoroughly, I would at least wear a condom. Imagine she gave a guy a BJ yesterday, and before the test results came back, she gave you one, giving you what that guy had.

My thought is, whatever she is willing to do without some trepidation, she has done before and it could have been yesterday with someone who wasn't clean.

[L.A. Tripp]

MG, those are indeed legit concerns.

For me, I have no problem fingering a girl. The fact is, I can usually get a girl off better by fingering her alone than most guys can by having sex with her, so this makes her more curious about sex with me. And, I could be naive, I but I don't worry about catching anything by fingering. I do, however, like to wash my hands. It's a personal hygiene thing, lol.

As far as getting a BJ or going down on the girl . . . I love both, but I don't do them often. Not all girls are good at going down on guys, so I'm not overly anxious about having one do that to me. And, I know what I can do for a girl if I go down on her and am not willing to just freely do that for any girl. Like with my finger, I'll get her hooked.

Plus, as with your worry, there is the threat of diseases from that, so if I'm gonna do that, I want to know a little about the girl first.

In fact, if I find out that the girl has a couple of regular fuck buddies and I know they aren't the type to . . . not bring her diseases . . . then I just refuse to have sex with her. Condoms don't keep you from getting all STD's.

I still get laid every day, so getting laid isn't the problem or concern. Instead, it's me giving the girl an experience she won't have with any other guy. And, if "I'M" not convinced that she's clean . . . why bother?

[-TruTh-]

I will attempt to educate you on the STDs

All But HIV HPV And Herpes Simplex 1 - 2 are curable and will go away with antibitiotics.

Herpes - Herpes has sporadic times of outbreaking and it can be transfered Via viral shedding without any symptoms or signs. Herpes Oral is basically a coldsore or a cluster of ulcerations within the mouth practically on the gumlines. Herpes Simplex 2 primary on the genital region and is easily identified by blister like redspots.

HPV - Grows on the genital region and looks like black moles. HPV causes cervical cancer within woman but not men.

HIV - Can only be transfered by Saliva and bodily sacretions or through blood in a open cut. Symptoms are flu like and usually occur two years after contractment.

Basically be safe and stop worrying if the girl looks ill DO NOT TOUCH

-- Truth

[Sincerelee]

HIV - Can only be transfered by Saliva ... Symptoms are flu like and usually occur two years after contractment.

Great...now I am afraid to kiss without a doctor's ok.

[zoner]

You cannot get AIDS from. . .
Kissing
To become infected with HIV you must get a sufficient quantity of the virus into your body. Saliva does contain HIV, but the virus is only present in very small quantities and as such cannot cause HIV infection.

Unless both partners have large open sores in their mouths, or severely bleeding gums, there is no transmission risk from mouth-to-mouth kissing.

It's very difficult to get aids through saliva

[Sincerelee]

It's very difficult to die from kissing. I guess my hypochondriac side would prefer , "It is impossible to get HIV from kissing."

I had a friend who contracted HIV. Every day, until he died, he had to take drugs that nearly killed him from the side effects. He lasted as long as he did because of his focus on maintaining an incredible level of physical health prior to, and after contracting it.

[zoner]

It's very difficult to die from kissing. I guess my hypochondriac side would prefer , "It is impossible to get HIV from kissing."

I had a friend who contracted HIV. Every day, until he died, he had to take drugs that nearly killed him from the side effects. He lasted as long as he did because of his focus on maintaining an incredible level of physical health prior to, and after contracting it.
Fair. But if you live your entire life like that, you'll never drive a car, eat meat, or even leave the house. Sometimes you have to figure out whether the risk is worth the reward. (not saying you personally live your life that way) :)

[FinesseMG]

What I still want to fucking know, is, how are the bigshot PUAs that are saying they are having sex with all these hundreds of women not sick with some disease by now? Whatever their practices are, I want to know.

[Dancin' Dan]

[QUOTE=Sincerelee;132048]It's very difficult to die from kissing. I guess my hypochondriac side would prefer , "It is impossible to get HIV from kissing."

Lol we covered this as part of sex education back in school.

The level of HIV in saliva is so low that you’d need to ingest 9 buckets of their saliva before there was enough in your system to contract it. And you’d drown before you finished drinking that much. (Plus if you ever feel compelled to drink 9 buckets of your targets saliva you have far more immediate issues that you need to deal with!)

Hope this helps put your mind at ease :)

As for how the big shots get away with it? I guess by being careful, finding out what to look for and looking for it before they go to work, and if they see anything suspect, they bail.

Peace out,
Dancin’ Dan.

[L.A. Tripp]

GAGGGGG . . .

Now that I've thoroughly spewed . . . thanks Dancin . . . lol

[Dancin' Dan]

Lol No worries :)

I'm afraid I can't tell you how many buckets of spew you'd have to drink to contract it... but I'd guess you'd drown in that first too... :rolleyes:

Sorry, I'll stop now :P

Peace Out,
Dancin' Dan.

[L.A. Tripp]

You're sickening . . . you know that man? lol ;)

[Dancin' Dan]

Yeah and you love it! :D

I did have something more sickening lined up, but it took too long to write and I was looking for something punchy, you know, real shock humour... lol.:p

[Arctic]

Its good to see that most of us here understand the risks .

Now for the bad news.

As a student whose been to 3(!) US universities,STDs are rampant.I don't care to know what the national numbers are.

Worse,its not something people are gonna be honest about.For one,if Style or Mystery caught an STD they won't publicise it-and really,who would?

Your HB won't be in a hurry to warn you,either-assuming she knows herself,as several diseases have waiting periods.

But Arctic,there's condoms/treatments/ etc.Its all good,right?

Think of it like a car-every time I get in my car,I risk two undesirable outcomes:a crash that damages the car,or a citation by the law.

I risk these outcomes regardless of my knowledge or skill level.Worst case scenario,a semi loses it or a bridge falls on me and I get killed.More likely my car will just be damaged cosmetically,but the only 100% safety is to stay off the road.

That's how STDs work.Granted,you don't need sex to get to work(depending...) but you can do every safe measure on your part-and still get rolled.It probably won't be AIDS,but speaking for myself,I'm not in a rush to catch a permanent viral infection.

Keep this in mind ,at the risk of sounding cliche'd:its not a mark against you to delay sex to see who she is first.I'd be rich if I had $10 for every girl I almost slept with that
I found out had an STD after the fact.

-Arctic

[Westfire]

I do a medical-related study, so I know quite a lot about this.

First off, as said earlier, most things are curable with some antibiotics. IF you go to the doctor in time with it. So, if there's anything odd at all about your dick, even if it hurts to pee, you gotta go there quickly and get treatment.

Next, the non-curable stuff:

Herpes comes in two forms, as said earlier. There's an oral form and a genital form of herpes. If you have this virus, you will carry it with you for the rest of your life. BUT! What's very important to know is that you can only transfer it when symptoms occur. You get red blister on/near the lips of your mouth, or blister around your dick/vagina. If you don't instantly puke from seeing a dick on the internet, just do a google images search for genital herpes. Again: If those blisters are not present, it can not be transferred. And most importantly: the oral version can be transferred over to the genitals, so then you will have the genital version of it. You'd have to be the most stupid guy in the world if you let a woman with those symptoms on her mouth give you a blowjob. Most women who have the virus and have visible symptoms (it's only for like 1-2 weeks) usually try to hide it and keep away from the public/clubs as much as possible. The last thing about this: the genital version sucks much more than the oral one. In fact, many many many people have the oral version of it, just because it runs in the family.

HPV, I don't have anything to add really. It's only lethal for women, but it has visible symptoms: don't catch it. You get warts from it, it's disgusting and it should be pretty clearly visible when someone has it.

The last thing I want to give you some information about: HIV.

No-one seems to know the real truth about HIV, so let me sum up a few facts first:

1. HIV is more of a chronic disease nowadays. You wont die, but you won't live a pretty life.
2. The probability to actually get HIV from unprotected sex is very low for a heterosexual guy.
3. HIV can indeed be transferred in many many ways. Someone could sneeze in the bus close to you and you can actually catch his HIV that way. It's a one in a billion thing, but it's possible.

Now, I'm not the best wikipedia fan because of the incorrectness of quite a few "statistics", but they did get this right. Here's some chances to get HIV when exposed to it:

Blood transfusion: 9 out of 10 (so, if you give 10 blood transfusions with infected blood, 9 of those will infect the other person)
Child birth: 1 out of 4
Sharing an infected needle (like, using heroin): 1 out of 150
Receiving anal sex: 1 out of 200
Giving anal sex: 1 out of 1500
Receiving vaginal sex: 1 out of 1000
Giving vaginal sex: 1 out of 2000
Receiving oral sex: 1 out of 10,000
Giving oral sex: 1 out of 20,000

This is all assuming you use no condom. Why does the receiving end have a larger chance of getting infected? Because sperm is filled with HIV. If you would blow over her like in a porn movie, these 'probabilities' suddenly drop dramatically.

So, if a girl has sex with a HIV-infected guy, there's only a 0.1% probability that she will get HIV if they don't use a condom. Factors like internal wounds can effect this and increase the probability pretty fast, but if you wear a condom there should be almost nothing to worry about.

Finally, HIV is most common amongst gays, because they all do some sick shit I don't even want to think about.

My verdict? Just wear a condom. Once you get into a relationship, get both of you tested and proceed without protection. (do use birth control, unless you want kids of course)

I hope this information was useful to any of you.

[Big Papa]

Lets please discuss this.

I actually have a big fear of having any sort of one night stands or sex with girls I don't know to be clean from testing. Even though condoms help, I feel that a baby can be dealt with, but once you get a disease you're fucked. So, I'm wondering, am I overthinking it? How is it that Mystery and other mPUAs who have had sex with hundreds of women have not contracted anything? Or have they? Please share your thoughts or knowledge about this. Also:

Do you feel it is OK to get a blowjob without a condom on? If not, do you get flavored condoms for this?

Do you feel it is OK to eat a girl out? If not, what do you use for protection? I read that you can use a cut up condom, a dam, or saran wrap.

Do you feel it is OK to finger? I'm afraid of diseases getting in through the cuticles.

To each his own, I personally decide this when the time comes, I and i stress (I) do not use a condom when getting a bj, fingering, and such.

I go down unprotected but kinda like Tripp said its not something i do for every woman, fingering i wouldnt really worry about, just keep em clean, if you get a freak let her lick em off when your done.. just remember be safe and have fun.. do what feels right

[dman]

don't over think this stuff and freak yourself out, just make sure you put a condom on before you fuck her

is like wearing a seatbelt in car, is the responsible thing to do and there isn't much else that you can do when a car crash does happen other than being wearing it (the seatbelt, or in this analogy: the condom)

[Sincerelee]

...is like wearing a seatbelt in car...

Isn't it more like wearing an airbag?

[Thomas]

Okay, I know you americans have crappy sexual education, so I'm going to add my 2 cents. To be on the safe side, I'd like to state that some of this information may not be entirely correct. It is the distilled knowledge of pretty good sex ed classes and personal research.

First of all, I can almost guarantee you that Mystery, Style and/or the rest of the gang has or has had at least one, if not several sexually transmitted infections. Hell, a lot of you probably have one as well. The lifetime prevalence of HPV, maybe the most common sexually transmitted disease, is something like 70-80%, possibly more. Herpes is almost as common, with the seropositivity of HSV-1 being about 50% in the safest countries in Europe, and HSV-2 at about 10-20% (for the US, it's slightly higher than these numbers, at around 70% and 20-25% respectively). I don't have statistics on how much of this is genital, and how much is oral herpes, though.

For both HSV and HPV, most infected experience little or no symptoms, and are often unaware that they are carrying it. If you have or get either of the two, chances are you're infected for life (the body does fight off HPV some times, but herpes is usually for life), but they are both often nothing but minor inconveniences. It is also worth noting that while herpes is most easily transmitted when there's an outbreak, it, and especially HSV-2, can also be transmitted by so-called asymptomatic shedding, that is when there are no symptoms.

Oh, and there are several strains of both HSV and HPV. You can get infected with more of them, and obviously, the more you have the less fun it is.

But again, HSV and HPV are minor inconveniences, for us men, at least. HPV is the leading cause of cervical cancer in women, and it's therefore really stupid of the american right wing to oppose the HPV vaccine on grounds that it "encourages sexual behaviour"! (and that was todays political lecture) Some research indicates that it can lead to cancer in us men as well, anal and prostate I believe. I want that vaccine for myself, come to think of it.

Gonorrhea is a scary disease, but only if left untreated. If you get infected, you're gonna know, and it can be fought off with antibiotics. Some people, again, are asymptomatic carriers. It can, if left untreated, lead to sterility in women, and some nasty inflammations in men.

Chlamydia may be present in as much as 50-70% of the female population, and can remain asymptomatic for months or years. It, too, can be effectively cured with antibiotics.

Hepatitis-B is scary, the most common ways of transmission are unprotected sexual penetration and sharing of needles. It's prevalent in about 2% of western population, most of us manage to fight it off by ourselves, but it can cause severe complications, liver damage and death. It's a pretty good reason to protect yourself during sex. Oh, and to don't have sex with people who do injection-based drugs.

HIV is the big scary monster of sexually transmitted infections, and it's pretty bad. Medical research has advanced enough that us rich western kids can now die with it instead of from it, but that doesn't mean you want to get it. Unprotected sex with high-risk groups (homosexual men, (women who have unprotected sex with men who have sex with homosexual men, I suppose), drug addicts that share needles, and people who have a lot of unprotected sex with a lot of other people) is stupid, stupid, stupid, even if the chance of actually getting it is slight. If you do expose yourself to such a situation, there are antivirals that can kill off the infection before it sets, but the treatment is unpleasant and must be administered shortly after exposure. As you can't really know, when it comes to a one-night stand or random sexual encounter, if the girl you're having sex with belongs to a high-risk group, you should assume she does.

HIV most easily transmits through unprotected anal sex (excluding blood-related means of transmission), is present in spit, but in so small amounts that for someone to get it through oral-oral or oral-genital contact, there really need to be something else, like cuts and blood, present. Oral-genital contact is low-risk, oral-oral is practically no-risk (though there have been reported incidents).

Correct use of condoms drastically reduce the risk of getting infected with HIV, by 85% or so. It does not protect that well against herpes, especially not when there are sores. Unless you both have the virus, don't have sex while there's an outbreak. I can't remember right now how it fares against other diseases, but it varies. It does however protect well against those that are nasty and difficult to treat, in a stroke of great luck.

In closing, no, most sexually transmitted diseases really aren't that big a deal*. They can be annoying as hell, but nothing more. Certainly less of a problem than, say, diabetes. However, some of them are really bad, and it's therefore a pretty damn good idea to use condoms. There's also, obviously, the possibility of pregnancy.

*in the same way catching any other bothersome but not debilitating infection isn't a big deal.

[Sincerelee]

I went to my doctor a few months back. I had him test me for cancer, diabetes, and since the insurance company paid for it, STDs.

I got a clean bill of health on all. In fact, the day the tests came back, two of the nurses called to ask if I was single.

[L.A. Tripp]

I went to my doctor a few months back. I had him test me for cancer, diabetes, and since the insurance company paid for it, STDs.

I got a clean bill of health on all. In fact, the day the tests came back, two of the nurses called to ask if I was single.

LOL, nice. Did you take them up on their offers?

[VIDiabloIV]

If Ive already kissed the girl Ill get a BJ without a condom. If she's infected, might as well get a 2fer

[FinesseMG]

What's a 2fer. Also, seems like chance of infection is higher from bj than kissing.

[Sincerelee]

Before I get the idea that part of being a PUA is that you need to not care if you get an STD, you guys need to be honest with me.

Do you really have so little concern or are you really concerned, but are taking a different route than I am to protect yourself?

Speaking of protection, please, use a condom when getting a BJ. You do not know what could be sitting in her mouth or on your penis. You are not doing yourself a favor by a little extra sensation and possible chance of getting something. And, you are not leaving her better off if you are giving her herpes.

I have a slight inclination that some on here are so self-confident that they think that they cannot get an STD. If that is you, please explain to me how you can accept that. I haven't read "Sperm Wars" yet, but I have a suspicion that it promotes the idea that STDs will not affect the superior man...or that STDs are just part of the sperm warfare and are to be expected. I only suspect this because a friend promotes the book and he seems to have that attitude.

[PUA casanova]

Before I get the idea that part of being a PUA is that you need to not care if you get an STD, you guys need to be honest with me.

Do you really have so little concern or are you really concerned, but are taking a different route than I am to protect yourself?

Speaking of protection, please, use a condom when getting a BJ. You do not know what could be sitting in her mouth or on your penis. You are not doing yourself a favor by a little extra sensation and possible chance of getting something. And, you are not leaving her better off if you are giving her herpes.

I have a slight inclination that some on here are so self-confident that they think that they cannot get an STD. If that is you, please explain to me how you can accept that. I haven't read "Sperm Wars" yet, but I have a suspicion that it promotes the idea that STDs will not affect the superior man...or that STDs are just part of the sperm warfare and are to be expected. I only suspect this because a friend promotes the book and he seems to have that attitude.

Honestlly dude i respect you so much for actually saying this. Some of the other guy shtat say "Oh hey look at me i fuck with out condoms haha hell yea"... wtf? i agree i dont plan to get a bj without a condom or if i know for a fact that she's clean.

But infiections to my dick isnt my concern. I want to know what are the chances of getting hpv or herpes... any type of shit like that, from kissing. Cause thats what we do most of the time if you think about it. We kiss more woman than we fuck. So what are the chances of getting something on or in your mouth from kissing a girl who has something on her mouth? (Obviouslly when theres no symptom)

[catalyst]

Before I get the idea that part of being a PUA is that you need to not care if you get an STD, you guys need to be honest with me.

Do you really have so little concern or are you really concerned, but are taking a different route than I am to protect yourself?

Speaking of protection, please, use a condom when getting a BJ. You do not know what could be sitting in her mouth or on your penis. You are not doing yourself a favor by a little extra sensation and possible chance of getting something. And, you are not leaving her better off if you are giving her herpes.

I have a slight inclination that some on here are so self-confident that they think that they cannot get an STD. If that is you, please explain to me how you can accept that. I haven't read "Sperm Wars" yet, but I have a suspicion that it promotes the idea that STDs will not affect the superior man...or that STDs are just part of the sperm warfare and are to be expected. I only suspect this because a friend promotes the book and he seems to have that attitude.

Sperm Wars doesn't promote anything. It just gives the biological and scientific basis for human sexual behaviour. It is a must read for anyone interested in sexuality or PUA activities. Buy it tomorrow. It is an amazing read.

In some people I guess it could give them a bit of a negative attitude towards women. If anything with myself it made me realise some of the fucked up things they might do they don't have any control over.

[AFC Ajax]

Yes, I am pretty worried about STDs myself as well.

My practice;
Getting tested every so many months is a good idea.
I dont do anal or oral, nor let a girl give me oral unless I am absolutely sure she has no STD. Fingering shouldnt be a problem. Keep your nails short. Check for open cuts on your fingers, if theres blood dont finger the girl. Ive read that even if you had a cut recently its pretty save, because even a small scab/thin new skin over the cut is enough to protect you. STDs cant move through solid skin.

[dr_webber]

Yeah and you love it! :D

I did have something more sickening lined up, but it took too long to write and I was looking for something punchy, you know, real shock humour... lol.:p

you should listen to the aristocrats joke, now thats "real shock humor".
and it also doesn't stray far from the topic of this thread, you can find it on youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg