Posts In This Category

• Private 1 on 1 With Matador in LA, The Birth of Achilles by admin
• Facebook Opener (Day, Bar, Social Game) by Discovery
• The Rebirth of AMOGing by Colgate
• The Pickup Artist: The New and Improved Art of Seduction by Lovedrop
• Phone Game Part 7: Etiquette While Being A Busy Man by Prophet
• My Home is Where I Game by Moonlight
• The Last Hour by Colgate
• Matador Review - Los Angeles One on One Training by Blitz
• Classic Question and Answer with Mystery Part 1 by Mystery
• Classic FR: World Top Playboy Playoff Challenge Spring 2005 by Mystery
• Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop & Discovery Review by Dyyz by Blitz
• 1 Hour to Greatness…. The Power Hour by Discovery
• Phone Game Part 6: If You Don’t Get Her On The Phone by Prophet
• Your Hands for Her Pleasure. Part 1 by Dr. Chaves
• Question and Answer with Mystery Part 2 by Mystery
• Matador One on One Review by Torero by Matador
• Starting Your Day Out Right by Wild Card
• Phone Game Part 5: Your Voicemail Can Be Your Wingman by Prophet
• What’s Up Her Skirt? Part 2 of 2 by Dr. Chaves
• Question and Answer with Mystery: Part 1 by Mystery
• Routine Stacking in A1 and A2 by Caddy
• Matador Interviewed at brobible.com by Blitz
• VA Looking for Sales People Immediately! by Discovery
• Adventures in Cuba - FR by Showcase
• How to Generate Your Own DHV Stories, With Examples by Caddy
• Phone Game Part 4: Between Your First Call And Your Day 2 by Prophet
• What’s That Under Her Skirt? Female Anatomy: Part 1 of 2 by Dr. Chaves
• The Benifits of Productivity by Wild Card
• Unbreakable by Knack
• Field Report #1: Party of Five (Matador + Four Girls) February 2009 by Simeon
• The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 4 by Dr. Chaves
• Classic FR: Thursday Night with Mystery Fall 1998 by Mystery
• More on Opening by Hawaii
• Phone Game Part 3: If She Calls You by Prophet
• Lovedrop’s Violation Theory by Lovedrop
• Taking Care of Yourself by Wild Card
• The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 3 by Dr. Chaves
• Classic FR- Friday Night with Mystery, Fall 1998 by Mystery
• Kino Compliance: The 3 Rs by Simeon
• Bodybuilding by Matador
• Women Are Like Cats Part 1 by Rizen
• The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 2 by Dr. Chaves
• Classic FR: Fall 1998 by Mystery
• Jealousy: Learning to Control It by Wild Card
• The Seven Deadly Mistakes of Permanent Fat Loss by Steve Jacks
• Using Facebook by Simeon
• Hawaii on Opening by Hawaii
• Knack’s Theory on Teaching Pickup by Knack
• The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 1 by Dr. Chaves
• Phone Game Part 1: Making the First Call by Prophet
• Who We Are, What We Do by Lovedrop

Private 1 on 1 With Matador in LA, The Birth of Achilles

What's it like when you have a Master PUA watching over you in the field and giving you instant feedback on your game? Can you imagine the confidence you would feel having a powerful Jedi at your side as you're weaving in and out of the Matrix of social dynamics. I recently had the opportunity and the privilege to be trained one on one by the star of VH1s "The Pickup Artist" and one of the legends of the game "James Matador".

Prior to this one on one I had attended a few bootcamps and had literally read and listened to EVERYTHING I could get my hands on, in regards to the game. Needless to say I was very successful in my social life and really had no shortage of beautiful women. I had met Matador at the LA bootcamp and it was his presence and deeper understanding of the game (Matador Mayhem) that got my attention right from the start. I had a similar vibe to my game and instantly knew that it was my goal to study under him as I felt he could shed some light on my game which would catapult me to a new level. 

Long story short the opportunity presented itself and I found myself sitting on 'Melrose' eating sushi in front of my, now teacher and mentor, Matador as he whipped out the laptop and started to demo for me different concepts. He listened as I broke down my game and my understandings and through guided questions helped me to come to a groundbreaking realization about my way of being that was preventing me from being much more effective. 

That night we hit the club and I went to work demonstrating my skills. Gotta say it was a little nerve racking having him stand a few feet away from me or sit inches away right next to me and watch as I was running my game. After I had isolated a few different sets and lost them, I went to him and said “why the fuck am I losing these fucking sets?” he smiled and said Ill show you and then proceeded to demo to me how I was sitting and what I was communicating. The stories from that night are stuff of legends. To get into the details would surely seem as if im exaggerating. However I can tell you that we ended up back at his house with a party of 9 women. I witnessed first hand why "Matador" has become the legend that he has as the three model type Blondes excitedly made their way into his bedroom for a "Foursome" took place! 

Even though I was running on no more than a couple of hours of sleep, the next morning I was up early and ready to take on the day. I will tell you that by the second day I cant tell you exactly what had happened but I knew I was a different man. I walked through the streets and the people were reacting very differently to me. I met up with Matador and we went through another 6 hours of theory and drilling. This day he was very interested in my experience of the night before and I was very excited to report the changes I had been feeling. I had seen my mistakes clearly and had experienced life changing results. I was ready to ask my questions to clear up a few points which I needed help on. We took a little break and were going to meet up again at night to go out. During the 3 hours in between the lecture and going out I literally had women putting their numbers in my hand. It was truly amazing. The effortlessness of it all seemed a little serial. I got dressed and ready to go out and this night I knew it was on. My game had changed and all the little tiny things I was doing that was preventing closes were taken out and I was ready to put this shit to the test in the club as I had already seen its power in the streets the mall and restaurants. We met up and hit club Delux in LA. The experience was absolutely out of this world. There is a song by Rhianna and JayZ entitled Were Gonna Run this Town Tonight and I tell you Matador and Achilles ran that town that night. The club was ours. All the women were ours. All the guys were owned. The bouncers were our fans. The hired guns were our adoring spectators. By the end of the night if you had walked in you would have thought that Matador and I were the club owners! The night ended very similar to the night before with us ending up at Matadors apartment followed by our newly acquired entourage. I will save you the details but movies and books could be written about the experiences of that night. 

By the next morning I felt different. I looked different. Everywhere I went it seemed as if I had a fuckin scent coming off of me that was bringing girls to me begging for my attention. I was at ease. I was calm. I finally had total confidence in this area of my life. I have been back for a few days now and EVERY area of my life has changed for the better. My skills are still with me and growing. Matador had told me to stay in contact with him and update him on my game and ask any questions. The next day I called him and thanked him for a life changing experience and let him know how things had changed for me. He said “Get a pen and paper and write this down” and then proceeded to breakdown in more detail what he had observed and what I needed to do to continue to improve. 

I have achieved many, many things in life and have had the privilege to study with different icons of our time in different fields including Acting and Martial Arts. After having met James Matador I am proud to call him my teacher and my good friend and let it be known that I assure you whatever stories you may have heard about the skills of the man, if you doubted it, it was due to your own inability to understand the reality he lives in. I have witnessed first hand why he is a Master PUA and I have been and am continuing to be trained by one of the best Pick Up Artists of our time James Matador.

- Achilles

Facebook Opener (Day, Bar, Social Game)

Ok so I have been pressured at many bootcamps to get my ass on here and share some of the stuff we are using infield. Now I get AA on these forums as I know how long it takes me to right stuff. So am going to practise with short and sweet little tit bits throughout February (my birthday month;-) that you can begin using as they have been field tested to the hilt.

this opener (1 of 3 to do with Facebook) actually was field tested in Starbucks, West Hollywood when I was out visiting Mystery and the gang. Now guys if like me you are from the Uk and not used to seeing super hot women, man this starbucks had more hotties than I see in a month in Nottingham, UK lol. But this Starbucks is special as it was right over the road from Vivid Porn Studios and it just seemed to be a haven for hotties.

So there is me beavering a way on my laptop, while being constantly distracted (God I was like a dog with 2 dicks and a street full of lamp posts!)… So anyway I was working on some new Day Game openers and stuff I could use in normal social settings and kept having a browse at my facebook, pondering on whether or not to remove my then recently ex'd girlfriend - well we had split up after 9 months (this was during the end of my 1st year in the game) - I had, had to feel the pain, knowing she would move on and as a hotty would get all the attention in the world and I would have to get out of my comfort phase and get my sarging head back on.

I was trying to move on quickly, but kept getting shitty messages about me and the women in photos I was getting tagged with (IOI? I don't know, felt more like bitterness to me) but it was causing problems with the friendship I really wanted us to retain. I had found strength to move with some great advice from my friend James Matador…. And my dilemma was….. whether or not to remove her from my facebook and all the back lash it would create.

so what the hell, I typed it out there and then in Starbucks W. Hollywood and to get me out of the headspace of where and when to run it, I agreed with myself, the minute I stop writing it, I will run it on the first 8+ that walks by.

10 minutes later, finished, a girl that a year ago I would have considered way out of my league walked by with a vibrancy in her step and a smile that said I am something special (the ones we tend to shy away from .

Here is what happened on that day in its raw format:

——————————————————–
Me: "Hey, let me get your thoughts on something real quick."
[i didnt wait for her to respond]

Me: "How long, if at all, should you wait before removing an ex from your facebook?"

HB: "Well how long have you been split up?"

Me: "Well only a month, but I'm out here and she's touring and I keep getting all these questions about what am up to because she has seen me tagged in various photos while I've been out here."

HB: [slings her bag off her shoulder and sits down] (I like forwardness of American girls) "ooo this is an interesting one"

Me: "Grab a seat why don't you" [neg with playful attitude]

Me: "So anyway, I always used to tell her that if I were away doing shows [open loop] and she ever felt uncomfortable about any pictures she saw me tagged in, not to keep it inside and be frustrated, but ask me and I'd be happy to fill her in on what was going on"

HB: "Oh that's nice of you" [I never caught onto the IOIs until later reflection, which is normal when you are running new material as you are too focussed on getting it out to practise - and that's why you shouldnt be changing your material every week to find the next best opener!]

Me: "woah there, slow this down, by me a coffee before you hit on me like that" [cute laugh in return to neg 2]

Me: You know I felt for her…. a. she was in less of a position now to ask the questions and b. I didnt have the opportunity to re-assure her - so she was kind of like getting a double emotional wammy…. and all because some women dragged me into a harmless photo at a friends party [pre-selection].

HB: mmm she ponders

Me: "well right or wrong I just told her, look…. you're not going to like it, but we are both going to be meeting new friends and getting back to growing our social garden and I dont want you feeling niggled every weekend when you look on my facebook, so am taking you off for a month or so, so we can both relax and not feel judged".

HB: "Yeah that's fair - So what you doing in Hollywood?" [IOI]

————————————————————–

Now just so you know how it all went, she invited me and a friend to a house party in the hills (after a bit of text game later the next day) which I went to with Matador and the host (a Director of some old Movie that I had never seen, but Matador had) really liked us, which in turn added to our value with her. She turns out to be one of the Playboy Golf models (not the Mansion types, but more the everyday pretty types Playboy uses for corporate events) - and has loads of contacts - now I was only there a couple of days, so rather than play and run, I decided (friend zone I hear you shout ) to put her into my non FClosed cool GFs - who has since hooked me up with no end of parties and her friends in Hollywood and LA…. ahh good times, as I stare out my apartment window at the rain of Nottingham .

so in summary:…………

1. Hey, let me get your thoughts

2. How long, if at all should you wait before taking an ex of your facebook

3. let her speak for a moment then cut in

4. FTC - well what I said to her was xxxxx

Nice and simple!

Yeah I know… and in the day time (more so as she sat down indicating she did have time too) or social settings I like to extend the openers as to also demonstrate value with embedded DHVS.

I like this opener as its about relationships, dilema, facebook (I call it Fakebook for laughs) which is all current, your touring GF of value, the fact that she is still chasing you somewhat, that you have your social life going on, and some open loops for further conversation. All in all - solid 'chick crack'!
Definitely in this original format was suited to more calmer environments for delivery.

Try it out and let me know how you get on - lets see if we can get 50 guys to try it out - once 10 of you do, I will share the other 2 versions that I have created since then about Facebook.

There! I told you I get sucked in and takes me ages to type out!!! Hope you got some benefit

ps. any opinion opener I use, is taken from my real life, which is kind of a personal rule of mine in the game.

About Discovery

Discovery is the VA Program Director & Head of UK Training operating out of England. An inspiring International Speaker, he is a leading Personality Profiling Trainer and Sales Guru and has been awarded the prestigious ‘Insights Trainer of the Year’ award against 180+ nominees for 3 years running.

The Rebirth of AMOGing

By: Colgate and Discovery

The concept of being able to acquire a skill set in order to handle the Alpha Male in the group. The idea for most to be able to blow out the guys that generally succeeded in getting the girls prior to our knowledge of pick up can make any person excited. The reason why AMOGing works is because you can systematically take the attention away from other men who are competing for attention. By holding court, re-framing, and being in your own head space, you can successfully handle the threads AMOGs will throw at you.

The weird thing about AMOGing is that, while strangers will do it to you without hesitation, your best friends will too (keep in mind, when in-field your wing should never attempt to AMOG you). What I have noticed is that when two people have a connection in their friendship, they tend to banter with each other more than two individuals that do not share that connection. This is how Discovery and I developed the concept of WING-MOGING.

Wing-moging is a concept where wings can display a strong brotherhood and camaraderie by banter with each other. The routine not only displays a connection between the two, but also has DHV spikes embedded in that will set off attraction switches. The reason that the attraction is generated when viewing the display of connection is due to her sub conscious thought that is she aligns with one of the guys, she is guaranteed the social network, protection, resources and love from his wing and the other guys in his group.

The guys who have a strong connection with each other and have a tight "Entourage" game, can also be remembered much more by using wing-mog tactics. This will lead to the entire group being invited to better social occasions, girls tell their friends about the "friends" and say things like "you should meet these guys, they are so much fun”. You gain instant pre-selection to other targets by the girl who witnessed the wing-moging. Girls will invite us along because she knows her friends will appreciate her for meeting such awesome guys (which is rare). By Discovery and I using our wing-moging tactics, we can add to the social value and energy to the group. The possibilities become endless.

Example: Let's say Discovery is making fun of my beard

Discovery: What’s with the animal on your face bro?
Colgate: Man the chicks won't let me shave it, you should try it baby face!
Discovery: You know my girls like that "I've just had a face wax feel". Anyways your new Miss November girl surely can't like the feel of a badger scratching her bikini line!
Colgate: Man, (with exaggerated hand gestures) Miss November isn’t interested in my facial badger, she wants access to my Jurassic Park area! (Strokes groin area with cheeky smile)
Discovery: Why's that bro, cause it hides a monster? (said teasingly)
Colgate: Hey we are among friends here (puts arm around group and pulls them in and whispers) honestly more like a hamster. (when delivery is flawless the result is shrieks of laughter)
Colgate: So bro now that we are sharing how did the operation go (more serious tone)
Discovery: I will only get into it because I feel we are amongst friends, but it hurt like childbirth. You women have breast augmentations, BUT did u know you could literally double your length and increase your girth by 3 time!!! (pause) Now that the bandages are off, (release) I am so proud of my 3 inches!!!!
(Both guys howl with laughter while displaying to the group a connection in their friendship)

The idea is to generate a great vibe, embed DHV’s, show a tight brotherhood, while also not compromising each others values. Keep in mind this is not AMOGing, this is not meant to blow anyone out of the set. If anything it raises the value of both guys. Discovery and I can not tell you how many times this routine has led to us to being upgraded to V.I.P booths, celebrity after parties, invites to exclusive events, etc. We have also used it to skip lines at exclusive clubs when we have not had any pre-selection at all. When the guys have a strong frame and they demonstrate their brotherhood on the in they can easily persuade the bouncers that they offer value to the club. It is a very powerful gambit to add to you arsenal.

A word of advice, the delivery of both guys must be not only flawless but must also be genuine. Practice this enough until it comes off natural and real. It should not be scripted or feel scripted. When tight friends’ vibe together the energy they transmit is very powerful, Discovery and I developed this concept intuitively due to our tight brotherhood.

Another idea to keep in mind is that it can be done in front of other guys. Those guys who normally might try to be difficult or attempt to AMOG will sit back and observe both guys wing-moging. This will leave them with no place to interject and attempt to AMOG because they can not compete with two dominant forces putting out a great vibe, therefore, this is ideal for mixed set.

FIVE WING-MOG TIPS

1. Divide holding court: By dividing the attention, both guys can hit the attraction switches equally and be perceived as high value.
2. Feed off each others energy: When both guys are enjoying each others stories and adding value through laughter, the group will feel the emotional richness and enjoy the company of both guys.
3. Don’t under any circumstances make each other look bad: Wing-moging is meant to increase the value for BOTH guys. Do not make each other look bad, by one guy making his friend look bad, it in turn lowers his value.
4. Be comfortable displaying physical contact with each other: Hug your wing and do it comfortably. Not only will this give you plausible deniability to hug the girls more but it will visually show the connection of the brotherhood.
5. Be okay with laughing at yourself: If you are comfortable with laughing at yourself and your wing is as well, both of you can gain from the possibilities by telling stories of each other (be sure to embed DHV’s).

This concept has proven effective in many dynamical situations. We have ran venues with our vibe and have people remember us on a first name basis wherever we go. People are attracted to people who show appreciation for other people. They will not only attempt to be a part of your social circle, but they will go out of their way as well.

- Colgate

About Colgate

Colgate is a VA Coach operating out of New York City. He is known for conveying a rock star personality in-field, adding humor, energy, intrigue, and other characteristics that contribute to the vibe and energy of the club. Along with being a VA Coach, Colgate is a successful magician, author, and recording artist. He is currently finishing his dual degree in Social Psychology with a concentration in sexual studies.

The Pickup Artist: The New and Improved Art of Seduction

The Pick-Up Artist 2 (tv show) is a reality show on VH1 and iTunes, starring our very own Mystery and Matador. (Click for full article.)

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The Pickup Artist: The New and Improved Art of Seduction (the book) is our new release from Villard books, by Mystery, author of The Mystery Method: How To Get Beautiful Women Into Bed, and Lovedrop, author of Revelation.

Coming off the success of his first bestselling book, The Mystery Method, Mystery once again teams up with writer Chris Odom to "impart some pearls of wisdom," and this time, he has quite a story to tell. Just as his VH1 reality show The Pickup Artist is about to debut in the United States, Mystery and his crew have withdrawn to their gorgeous Miami mansion to get into shape and plot their next move. A one-on-one pua student, Adam, comes to stay at the house and get his every question answered. As a kaleidoscope of crazy pua characters enlivens the scene, Mystery begins to draw Adam deeper and deeper into his world, where he witnesses firsthand the pitfalls of the pickup artist lifestyle, and gains an intimate portrait of Mystery's ideas and struggles. Eventually Adam must decide whether the powers of the pua game are worth the surreal lifestyle that comes along with it. As the book progresses, Mystery and his partners, Lovedrop and Matador, travel from the sands of South Beach to the strip clubs of Las Vegas, criss-crossing the country to teach their seminars on pickup and seduction. They party in the Hollywood Hills, set up their own Pleasure Bubble, and taste the high life among the towering skyscrapers of Manhattan. Along the way, Mystery reveals the next level of game theory and technique, designed to catapult timid and insecure men into a world of confidence, attractiveness, and all-around success with women. Mystery serves another rich helping of knowledge this go-around, for those readers seeking his techniques…

• A list of all the triggers that create—and destroy—attraction

• A new way to approach strangers and start a conversation: microcalibrated openers

• Mystery’s most powerful humor technique, The Absurd—so you’ll never run out of things to say again

• A full chapter on physical escalation (touching, kissing, “making a move”)

• The solution to inner-game issues, for improved confidence

• A chapter on exotic dancers and strip clubs

• How to set up your pimp pad

• Mystery's philosophy on life

• Plenty of gambits

• And much, much more…

When it comes time for Mystery to reveal the secrets of physical escalation (touching, kissing, 'making a move') he says,

"Physical escalation is actually quite easy. Just read along with me, and I will show you how. Just do what I say and it will work. Don’t worry, it’s easy, and the moves I’m going to teach you will not get you rejected. Trust me, it’s fun and you can stop anytime. Now, let’s get right into it…"

With all the good advice in this book, Valentine's day is sure to be just a little less lonely this year. We didn't know it could be so easy, Mystery. Thanks for all the good work. The Pickup Artist: The New and Improved Art of Seduction, by Mystery with Chris Odom. Foreword by Neil Strauss, author of The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists. Also by Mystery: The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women into Bed

          Click here for more information on The Pickup Artist book…

Phone Game Part 7: Etiquette While Being A Busy Man

This is part seven of my series on phone game.  Click here to view my previous articles.

Etiquette is important when you are on the phone.  Proper phone etiquette conveys social intelligence and is a DHV.  Yet sadly it is something which most people simply do not have.  These days, people do a lot of annoying things when they are talking to a person on the phone.  As a PUA you need to be a man who not only doesn’t do those things, but also a man who doesn’t stand for it when someone else does them to you.  As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only.  These rules are not set in stone!  You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

One of the most annoying things that happens on the phone is when you call someone and they are busy with something else and not giving you their full attention.  If you call her up and she sounds distracted or busy or like she’s with friends or at work, cut the call short.  Have you ever called a woman and then, in the middle of a sentence, had to stop because she got distracted by something else on her end of the phone and was ignoring you?  It’s annoying and rude and as a PUA, you should be too busy to sit and wait for her to finish talking to her friend while you are sitting there on the phone alone.  Just say “You sound pretty busy over there.  How about I call you back.”  This will build comfort because it shows that you are mindful of what is going on in her life, and build value because it conveys that you just don’t have time to sit around and wait for her to pay attention to you.  If she realizes that she was being rude, she might apologize, in which case you can say “Oh it’s no problem.  I just don’t like talking to someone when they can’t give me their full attention.  Don’t worry about it.”  Do this with a friendly and understanding tone.  Do not sound disappointed, angry, or annoyed.  She’s a busy girl just like you, and you understand and respect that.  You would simply prefer to talk to her when she’s not distracted. 

This same rule should apply to you if things start coming up on your end as well.  If you cant be sure that you can commit 100% to the conversation without being distracted by external factors, then just let her know that and call her back later.  Just say “Hey I’ve got ______ happening over here, and I know how much I hate talking to someone who is distracted by something on their end, so how about I call you back?”  This can be a very powerful because it shows that you expect whoever you are talking to on the phone to show you the same courtesy and won’t put up with that kind of rudeness on the phone. 

However, having said all that, you can build a tremendous amount of value if you ARE distracted by something important that is happening on your end of the phone.  Most of the time, I will answer my phone if I know that she will hear the sounds of adventure and excitement in the background.  If there are people laughing, shouting or shrieking excitedly, or if there is music playing in the background then I’ll answer as I’m leaving the room so that she can still hear the noise but will be able to hear me fine.  The key here is to let her know that you can only talk for a second because you are in the middle of something, but still talk to her for a little longer so that she can try to hear what is going on.  If your target asks you what you are up to you should use your best judgment regarding whether you should tell her or just be coy about it.  You’re probably not going to want to tell her that you’re all just playing Call of Duty at your apartment, but you are going to tell her if you’re having some drinks at a friend’s place while he grills up some steaks.  The idea here is to demonstrate that you are a busy, sociable guy who has a lot going on in his life.  Just be sure to remember the rules for etticate described above when you do this. 

Another important rule to remember here is to never give her the impression that you are TRYING to keep her on the phone when she doesn’t want to be.  The moment you sense that she’s isn’t really invested in the conversation, end the call.  If applicable, get her to call you back, but add in that she can’t call you during a certain period because you will be busy then yourself.  The phone is all about comfort.  Not just building it, but preserving it as well.  She should never feel uncomfortable talking to you on the phone and it should never feel like you are TRYING to keep her there.  In fact, it’s a good rule of thumb to end the call before she does, that way you can be sure that you are never dragging things out too long. 

Finally, DO NOT rely on texting for your phone game.  This is another common trend amongst new PUAs: they see texting (and also online messaging) as a way to avoid the awkwardness and anxiety of a phone call and so they only ever text their targets.  But unless you’re dealing with extremely young or immature girls, most women will tell you that a man who texts her instead of calling is probably doing it because he’s too afraid to call her and is thusly is not going to get a date with her. 

Don’t believe me?  Make this into your opener (“Hey guys, phone or text?”) and find out for yourself. Women are a lot more perceptive about these things than you think. 

Texting should be used for sending silly messages back and forth, to let her know you’re thinking of her, or maybe sending a quick update on plans you have already made (see my previous articles on phone game for more on this).  It is VASTLY more difficult to build comfort via text than it is through a phone call.  People need to hear a voice.  They need to feel your emotions when you tell a story.  Far too much of the meaning in your communication is lost in text messaging.  It’s for this very reason that I almost never add my targets to MSN, Facebook, or any of that stuff until after we have had - at the very least - a solid Day-2. 

Well that’s it for phone game.  I think I covered everything I’ve learned here in these articles.  Check back soon for my next article on make sure you and your wings are learning the most from each other. 
 

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

My Home is Where I Game

Here you are. You’ve arrived to your venue and chances are this will be your only venue for the night. You’re fully excited, you’ve been planning it for hours, your cheat sheet is in your pocket, your breath is fresh, you are already in a talkative mood and ready for some action. But there’s one thing that suddenly seems to attack your mind: it’s your first time in this venue.

Aside from the friends you came with, there’s nothing you know in this place. Yes you’ve heard about it of course a lot of times and you probably know what kind of bar or club it is, but that won’t change the fact that you’re a newbie there and so you are penetrating the unknown. For some, this might not cause any problem but for others it seems to be like a devastating thought and you might feel so uncomfortable that your game could be completely ruined in the first seconds of your entry. So how can this feeling go away? Well it all depends on you my friend!

The reason why you feel unsure is because thousands of years ago going to an unknown field was a real danger. If the people of that field wouldn’t accept you as one of theirs, chances were your existence would end. Today we luckily live in a different era but in our heads we still feel this fear. As it is for the approach, the fear of the unknown keeps coming back and you need to learn how to deal with it. The good news is, it’s actually very easy to get rid of this feeling.

First of all before entering the venue put yourself in the right state of mind! Your goal of the night is to have fun and meet people. Yes of course you’re there to pick up girls, but don’t make a big deal out of it. Don’t tell yourself :  “I have to pick up girls” but try rather this: “I’m excited to have fun and make new friends”. Repeat this to yourself at least 10 times. That way you will already feel less stressed before you make your entry.

Once you are in the venue imagine you are entering your own living room. Now honestly; how do you feel when you are in your living room? Exactly, you’re relaxed and you don’t give a damn about anything. So why would it be different in here? Keep that picture of your living room for as long as you can or as long as you need to.

Don’t wait till you get in that state. Open immediately! Whether it’s the blond Diva next to the toilets or the fatty at the bar, it doesn’t matter. Make yourself at home! Wave to your (non existing) friend, smile, high-five girls or guys. Would you do all this if you were hosting a party at your place? Of course you would!

Whatever happens in the venue, good or bad, always ask yourself how you would react if you were at home. Do I care if a girl rejects me? No it’s cool, let’s move on.  Do I care if a guy tries to AMOG me? Nope, I’m smarter than him and I don’t fall into his game. It’s my home, my Game.

The last thing you need to do to completely forget that you have never been in this venue is to really believe that you are the owner. Walk in a way that conveys that you are a leader. Get your hands together on your lower back with a straight position and chat with anyone as if you were the president.

Wherever you go, there will always be a first time and if the fear of the unknown threatens to kill your night it’s more important to be prepared for that then for your Game itself. When you have the right state of mind, nothing can go wrong. So make yourself at home, any time, any place.

 

Moonlight

About Moonlight

Moonlight is a VA Coach operating out of Antwerp, Belgium and has been in the Seduction Community since 2005. He is a VA Coach and In-Field Instructor. In addition, he is a dancer, singer and actor. Moonlight is passionate about Psychology and Social Interaction.

The Last Hour

It's the last hour before you head out. It is familiar for all of us whether we were aware or not. It is basically the last few preperations before heading out to that target rich venue in to what is expected to be a great night. This does not include the usual such as showering, shaving, picking out outfits, etc. This is what you do in the last hour before you role. Before we do head out, we have to prepare ourselves on all levels so that we can present our best selves. So what areas must we work on in order to accomplish this, well here are the most important ones: 

Get into a talkative state: This is extremely important because if you are not in a talkative state by the time you arrive at the venue, you are simply wasting precious time that you could have put to more beneficial use. There are 2 ways that I recommend that guys approach this objective.

If you with your buddies run your material on them: Practicing your routines and gambits on the guys that you’re going out with is a great way to get into a talkative state. It actually serves as a multi-purpose drill because not only will you get into a talkative state but you will also get feedback on your delivery and tonality. If you’re by yourself, call a friend, parents, uncle, etc and talk to them about their day: This is also a great way to get into a talkative state if you are sarging by yourself. By calling someone you get to talk to someone you are comfortable with and as a result you will get into a talkative state.

Run through your cheat sheet and stack cards: This is extremely important so that the information you have is fresh in your head. Nothing spoils a set more than when you are in it and run out of things to say. As result, you are left lingering there and it lowers your value. Ideally, you should go through your cheat sheet and stack cards twice. Why not even three times. The more you familiarize yourself with your material the better it will sound. Just avoid sounding robotic in your delivery; this could also ruin a set.

Have your default opener memorized: We have all been there, we see a set and then……NOTHING! We didn’t follow the 3-second rule and walk up to the set because we had nothing to say. It’s a feeling every guy feels. Some of us turn our bodies away from the set (DLV), some walk past it or hover (DLV), and some blank out and can not think of anything to say. By having a default opener you can assure that this will not happen to you. Also it becomes useful when situations present themselves to you and you need a quick opener to get things rolling. Run your opener smoothly and persistently and you will become a master at it.

Smile for 3 mins straight: When you smile you feel better. This is due to the endorphins that your body releases when you are smiling. By keeping a smile (even a fake smile), your body will flush itself with endorphins and get you in a great mood. It is important to get into that happy and carefree state of mind before walking into the venue. By smiling in your power hour, you will walk into the venue with the biggest smile.

Breathing exercises: Nothing relaxes the body more than simple breathing exercises. Most people underestimate the power of breathing exercises due to the action being so mundane and familiar. Practice breathing in fully from the nose, then hold your breath to the mental count of 4, and finally release your breathe slowly through your mouth. Repeat 4 more times or until you feel relaxed.

20 push ups: Push ups are a great way to release that extra bit of tension before stepping out of the house. It will exert the negative energy away from your body and simultaneously pump testosterone and endorphins through your body. If push ups are too difficult, try doing 20 jumping jacks, or jog in place. The idea is to get into a great state of mind while inhibiting all the bad emotions and tension that may linger sub consciously. Once you’ve completed the objectives above, you should be feeling great. You should be prepared, relaxed, happy, and determined to make the night the best night possible. Remember stay agenda free and out come independent and you will excel your interactions. Keep in mind to always learn from every interaction and keep barreling through. Mastery happens with patience, experience and persistency, but it does happen.

-Colgate

About Colgate

Colgate is a VA Coach operating out of New York City. He is known for conveying a rock star personality in-field, adding humor, energy, intrigue, and other characteristics that contribute to the vibe and energy of the club. Along with being a VA Coach, Colgate is a successful magician, author, and recording artist. He is currently finishing his dual degree in Social Psychology with a concentration in sexual studies.

Matador Review - Los Angeles One on One Training

Los Angeles Personal Training, Oct 31 through NOV 3

You guys get ready for this! Do not waste your time reading my post…unless of course your interested in skipping levels&being called a cheater for training with the community’s best pick up artist (Besides Mystery). You will get really good really fast within the first day! (If you apply,focus,listen, and push.) You will be shocked at the end results! However, Matador can only train you as much as you allow him. I didn’t have any boundaries as far as holding myself back so he went all out in training me.

He picked me up from my hotel in L.A then we left for breakfast at a local diner…told him if he had 4days to turn me into a master pick up artist how will he do it..? (Inside I was confident, if it couldn’t be done then i was going to be the closest one to achieve it! Didn’t say it though) So he looked at me&chuckled. Handed me a notebook with a pen and told me to write down everything he says. (No i will not post any material or core concepts he taught me sorry) So the brain transfusion began. I was a sponge in water…A student seeking out answers to questions i have continuously asked…Matador had the answers. (game applies in every convo not just pick up so I learned a life tool!)

o.k so after training all day, got dressed, its Friday night, its game time! Matador’s bodyguard is waiting for us at the red carpet in front of club Social on sunset. Matador’s cool hot girlfriend rolls with us. (she speaks fluent Italian, an actress whose been in Italian movies, &used to model) she showed me her modeling pics their hot! So were in the the v.i.p room inside the club, its Halloween, & almost every girl is hot!!! There were porn stars! (we’ll talk about that in a sec) Matador shows me how to do his “Mayhem Technique” &makes out with this 3set! His girlfriend tells me to go bring some girls to our table, so I go open, attract, and bring a 3set. Isolated my target, then realized she wasn’t my type. So opened&after a little game, made out with this other girl. Matador&I took over! We opened every set, everyone was at our table or trying to get there…Told Matador I am stepping outside for a sec&I’ll be back. When I did, noticed one of the hottest porn stars at the club was out for a quick breather! This was it! Now or never…this was…my chance! It was all on me.

No hesitation I open, negged, non verbal false time constraint, used a DHV I learned that day(along with some other things he taught me) then everything started making sense It was all coming together now, its easy to run game…She was jumping through my hoops&the convo escalated through the stages.(Open, Attraction, Qualification, Comfort) Dude inside i was like WHOA! (applying matadors concepts was key though) So i rolled off at an high attraction point (lethal) then went inside the club found and opened another set. The porn star follows me! And COCK BLOCKS the 3set of girls i had just opened! So i look at her…she looks at me…I smile…then total make out! I spot Matador close by looking at me like, your a quick learner, good job bro! (I think he had expected that from me though.) He was in proximity & giving me briefs on how to play it, which was a good way for the girl&I to get the chance to get to know each other better, didn’t know any other way considering how many times she was getting hit on… So thats how i played it, then rolled off again… So shes chasing me through the club, &the camera crew is chasing her for pictures! Finally i give up, she was just too persistent lol she tells me she’s tired of people touching her&taking pics&wants to leave now.

Matador tells me to meet him at this 24hr restaurant close by. So i left&got a head start with my girl. We get there and waitress tells me there is an hour wait! Matador is stuck in traffic, (horrible on sunset during wknds) &unfortunately for me, my girl is so hot i get AMOG’D by Mystery’s stunt double…(its Halloween) but i disarm him&3 of his friends with some Matador AMOG tactics (genius). One of the guys was desperate and tried a last attempt by telling me he wants to show me a magic trick…I looked at my target and tell her “look honey dinner&a movie” she laughed I did 2…(it was our moment) Then I txt Matador to tell him whats going on…He txt back “Be there in a minute”

So the alpha guy of the group starts threatening me he’ll bring Tyler Durden to take my girl. So i tell my target to walk away she does, then I looked at the guy&tell him im Matador’s student where the hell are your girls?! (no disrespect to Tyler Durden) anyways the guy doesn’t believe me…Then Matador jumps out the car! This dudes jaw drops! And doesn’t say a word. We go inside the restaurant where my target&I built more comfort. And lets just say…the rest…is whatever your imagination wants it to be (just dnt get weird lol) &no i wont say the porn stars name, we still talk…

On Saturday Matador critiqued my game and we discussed new topics. By night time i felt like a full grown Bull around a bunch of calves! We went to a different club from the one on Friday&I hooked a 3set that ended up being a 6set! My target, a exotic Australian dancer! Who was on tour with her friends..Matador had already hooked in 2-2set’s&was on the third. Our table had too many girls, it was getting irritating though because i just wanted to get to know my target. So after befriending her group was able to isolate. Guys she was tough! I ran 3dhv’s with a combination of other things, she liked me just wont let me kino escalate…So Matador says roll off&fire a jealousy plot line(taught me a gd way to do it, never fails) So i did…But she didn’t like it because she was getting really jealous! So after a while looked at her, smiled, and asked if she’ll behave…She responds with a make out (i guess thats a yes) and then we bounced to matador’s gd friend’s mansion…whose now my friend as well. Lets just…say…the rest…is for your imagination as well…

Sunday we worked on more game. Then we went shopping&put together a custom avatar for my identity! Looked really good plus i kept getting opened by different girls. That night we went to Neil Strauss’s house, where he hosted a pick up artist party! Which i cant discuss (respect to Neil&Matador) what happens inside stays inside…but it was Freakin FUN!!!

Monday he went over any questions&we reviewed everything i learned that night. (not 2brag but call it how it is) Matador&I took over the whole floor (He took us to a club-lounge which gets PACKED on Monday) I stole a 2set from these 2 guys (nothing to be proud of) and Matador got lost in a crowd of 7 girls (so jealous) &then bounced these 2 cool Russian girls to a restaurant…then Matador wanted to go home&chill with his girlfriend, I don’t blame him. (Respect) So i had to hold down court with the 2set. Lets just say…the rest…hmm actually!…you know what…yea…for your imagination!

The following morning my flight departed back to Houston,Texas. Overall I think you should do the 1 on 1 training if you don’t mind going back home seeing other people be envious of your new power. &some guys would misuse this knowledge for their selfish purposes. (Its not cool to hurt a girl, we are men&should protect them at any cost from creeps!) If your not a bad guy then what are you waiting for?! You got to create your lifestyle nobody will hand it to you. Make it happen! Matador you changed my life by sharing with me your wisdom. Which allowed me to achieve a higher intuition level&even a greater level of awareness. And for that…not only do I appreciate…..but would like to take a moment…and Thank You! Was fun being their, as friend, student, and protege….Ttyl brother

Classic Question and Answer with Mystery Part 1

Q+A with Mystery: Fall 1998

AFC: I was extremely nervous during the 50 day experiment. Even more nervous than I expected to be. I don’t doubt that it showed, at least a little.

Mystery: Then just keep doing this till you PERFECT this. If you can get this right, timing and smile and confidence and playfulness and on and on, then you can move onto other scripts. All the other scripts are just as unassuming sexually speaking as the Elvis one. If you are going to use a script INTRO thing, then tell us first so we know you aren’t fucking up with bad intros like complements or sexual innuendo intros.

AFC: I don’t understand what you mean here. How do I manifest ‘being into myself’ when using the Elvis script?

Mystery: hold a magazine and sorta be reading it as you perform the script. Now remove the mag and there you are. Sorta thinking about this Elvis thing and talking aloud to someone. Outgoing people do this BTW.

AFC: That was my first instinct, but I guess I didn’t stick with it for very long. As he was on his way out of the store and glaring at me with daggers in his eyes, I smiled and gave him a friendly wave. His reaction was to become even angrier.

Mystery: Your getting angry was (nothing personal here) the most pathetic ego driven behavioral non thinking thing you could have done. It was unsophisticated, immature, stupid, lame and un-intellectual. The way to win in this life is no longer by strength. It’s by the brain. Don’t REACT to people. PRO-ACT. Think and win. EVERY SOCIAL interaction requires gambits and strategies like in CHESS. Consider learning chess. You will obtain many insights for girl getting.

AFC: I wasn’t especially creative, but I was honest and polite. It was only later than I responded with the same kind of disrespect that he had shown to me. Perhaps I should just have let him walk away.

Mystery: You didn’t recognize HIS feelings. You didn’t have compassion for HIM. You didn’t attempt to connect to the fact that you are both guys and her COULDA been a buddy if this didn’t occur. Bull shit baffles brains and by just misdirecting their attention with bullshit talk (fake facial tics or make random guttural noises). It’s FUN to fuck with people this way if they behave incorrectly. Don’t give them the same talk back, go one step ahead … think CHESS.

AFC: I imagine if I had thrown myself on the floor and started bawling like an infant, he would simply have walked away, thinking he had ‘won.’

Mystery: And then you yell, ‘Nooooooo, don’t …. GOOOOO!!!!’ You are so fucked up man. WINNER. Who’s the winner - he got the girl fucker. Of course he’s the winner. Nothing you can do can make you the winner when HE has the girl.

AFC: I’m not sure anybody would have recognized it as a joke. What does that gain me?

Mystery: Not the girl, so then what you COULD have gained. You aren’t exactly thinking as a player or pick up artist. You could have done this so over dramatically that it would throw him greatly.

AFC: Maybe it’s different at the clubs that you’re familiar with, but at the ‘18 and up’ type clubs that I can get into, I just can’t imagine going to a club by myself. I mean, I would just feel absolutely humiliated.

Mystery: And you don’t feel humiliated by our knowing you don’t have the sex appeal enough to have a girlfriend? Does that not … humiliate … you? Alright, so you go alone. You don’t have to TELL anyone. Just say your friend is in here somewhere. Later, you can say you got ditched or something. Your friend went home with a girl.
Easy.

AFC: Everyone would be looking at me like, ‘Why are you here by yourself?’, because everyone, I mean everyone, goes to these clubs with friends.

Mystery: I WORK in clubs dude. This is Bull Shit. Go alone. You can lie. Make friends.

AFC: Is this not the feeling you get when you go to a 21 and over club by yourself? How you deal with this? Since I’m not much of a dancer, I know that I would just feel too awkward about the whole situation, I’d spend maybe 5/10/15 minutes sort of standing by myself trying to look ‘cool’, and then it would get to me and I’d leave.

Mystery: Go alone. Don’t dance. MEET. Go from group to group in there talking to people. Make friends of everyone. Be fun. How can a girl be interested in you if you aren’t INTERESTING in the first place dude. Don’t stand there with a beer you your limp wristed hand. Don’t try to ‘look’ cool. Be cool by chatting with EVERYONE. When I can’t get a friend to go with me (Like yesterday by good buddy Tal bailed out on going downtown with me) I go out alone. I went out alone yesterday. That’s right. Am I humiliated? Well let’s see … I got two girls #s. How many did YOU get?!! Ok, that’s said and done.

Ah fuck who I am talking to away - If you are so insecure about being alone, you will not have the guts to actually approach girls anyway. Stay home.

AFC: There’s something about having friends wit you that allows you to convey the impression that you’re not needy even if/when you get rejected.

Mystery: Girls want guys who are confident enough to go ABOVE this whole thing. In fact, I even TOLD them I came down alone when my buddy bailed on me. And I had a fucking BLAST. I made two new guy buds and got 2 girls #s. OH, AND I met about 10 chicks that night and chatted with them and I even got a drink bought for me. So there. All alone I went. How humiliating.

Classic FR: World Top Playboy Playoff Challenge Spring 2005

Naw, I’d really like have a competition for real. In fact last night Style and I had a little contest. He bet me a dollar that I couldn’t make out with the first set I opened. I wanted to do the 5 set challenge but I was holding a boot camp and it’s day one so I can’t take more than 25 minutes per set because I have to show them how to cold approach.

Here’s what happened: in total I did like 7 sets. All opened very nicely (not a single blow out) and I was in set with each anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes. I went into isolation and kino escalation (hand holding and embracing) in all of them except one (but she had to take a photo with me and held me tight for it shrug - I came in negging too hard I surmise though if it wasn’t a boot camp I could have worked more as I easily had maneuverability by then). One of them (a 2set) a student of mine and I bounced at the end of the night … I made out with one (and rubbed her down there). So overall, since every set opened and ran very well, I’d say this is promising for a competition. It’s amazing to be able to open a set and KNOW you can go as far as you want with it and the full monty if YOUR CHOICE. The hardest part really is getting it to OPEN and build enough ATTRACTION for solid kino escalation (where they comply to your wishes to be touched). Once you have that (3 to 5 minutes in) the only way to lose is to fuck up. Just don’t do anything to compromise the attraction you built and you can just baby sit in comfort (with entertaining kino escalation) all the way to full monty, based not on time but on her comfort with each step in kino.

Now the logistics of many of them may compromise a WIN because one of the sets which blew open (we were embracing and it was very on) was - we concluded…

She and her other hot friend (Style was in with and later we pushed a student in) may have been on coke or something. She kept cutting off my threads every 3 seconds like a speed freak though I got into kino with her and could easily have continued students agreed she was acting very jittery and that’s not my interest. you never know what you’re gonna get til you enter and maneuver within the set.

Anyways, as for the first set: I went into a 2set. Tall, cute girl. Worked her for 30 minutes. Holding her, hand holding, cuddling, picture taking, and overall a great response … though the obstacle (who later bought me a drink)

Was socially retarded and reminded me of the jumping bouncy yapper dogs in old bugs bunny cartoons. So I did a take-away for a bit (locked her in with props of course) and did my boot camp. Later I waved at her and she waved me over with a big smile. I came over and some guy without a neck was pissed and started to yell at her. I never talked to him before but it appeared a jealousy plotline with an ex was developed. As her retarded friend was buying me the drink the guy said, “If you know what’s good for you you’d walk away.” I immediately went to the bouncers and bounced him the fuck out of there. I WIN.

BUT: while the retard stayed and I got my drink, the target, in a yelling fight with the guy, went outside with him to continue the argument. Oops. I owe $1 to Style for not making out with her. As you can see, with yappy and ex-con as my obstacles, I would have had to have isolated to outside the club and into the casino (as I said I would have done if it weren’t for it being a boot camp where I can’t do that) before any of this happened. So … Am I ready? You bet!

Mystery

PS: boot camp day 2 begins in less than 1.5 hours. I could have gotten a hotel last night and full montied the girl (I said to her, “you’d spread your legs for me tonight if I could stay wouldn’t you” and I rubbed her. She said, “Yea I would.” So that was a win enough because it was 4am, I had a boot camp to go to the next day and my GF was in my bed at home who is hotter. I was only demoing the MM skill set anyways. I don’t want to have to pay for a hotel (as she was sharing a room with her friend) just to have sex with a girl of lesser value than what I already have waiting for me. Shrug QUALITY PROBLEM huh.

Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop & Discovery Review by Dyyz

This should have been titled “All Instructors in LA Bootcamp.” Everyone was there except Hawaii that I have read about either from reviews or the forums. I mean, Kosmo and Joe D. from Season 1 of the Pickup Artist and Simeon, Greg and Brian from Season 2 were all there to help out, both in the classroom setting, as well as in-field. There was something to be learned from each and every one of them, and they are all very good.

The Classroom:

In the classroom settings you get two sessions with each instructor, Mystery, Matador, and Lovedrop; one one each day. The guys always run over the alloted time but that’s just because they have so much to teach and there isn’t nearly enough time for it all. At one point Mystery asked one of the other guys “are we making a schedule or running a bootcamp?” They want to make sure that they can instill every piece of knowledge possible in the time they have. I will do my best to touch on the ideas without saying too much, you have to see these guys explain it. It’s the difference from reading it to seeing it done.

Mystery’s classroom sessions included an indepth overview of the process and then an expanded session on the qualification step of the method. Mystery has so much information in his head that he cannot stop teaching. His teachings are thorough and very easy follow. He teaches the basic method that most everyone out there uses as the foundation for other methods or styles. Which is not entirely basic but it is easiest for an AFC to follow.

Lovedrop’s classroom experience is interesting as well because he openly admits that he knows he has to take most of the people in the classroom out that very same night and he teaches what will have the biggest impact on the students the quickest. That’s not to say that he isn’t thorough, it’s just that through experience, he’s learned what has the fastest results from the classroom to the in-field experience. I have also read where people are comming down on Lovedrop because he says “Mystery would say…” that’s because the process is so internalized for all of the instructors that in order to teach it, they have to actively think about what they do and what is the best way to teach it. As as I just said, the “basic” method that Mystery teaches is the one that gets the best results from the students the quickest. Lovedrop covers the inner game as well as kino escalation. The biggest thing I took away from his sessions is the ability to help control approach anxiety.

Matador’s classroom time was entirely different. He explains early on that he uses a different process than the other guys. He also explains that he goes through all of the method’s steps from A1 to C1 in a matter of seconds. It’s just all in how he calibrates and executes. His biggest topic is attraction. The so-called Matador Mayhem is based around sexual tension and is amazing. This guy has a way of breaking down what he does and how it works so that even an AFC could at least, attempt to do what he does.

Discovery dosn’t spend too much time with the students in the classroom. He is the one who debriefs with the students and he help fine tune what he saw in-field. He has a charisma about he that he passes on to the students in the delivery of the material. I wish we had more time with this guy, because he has a lot to offer the community.

The Pickup Artist guys all came in and joined us when it was time to breakup into smaller groups to practice the material and delivery. They are exponentially better than they were even at the end of the TV show. They help you with the details, from body language to vocal tonality and they can help out a lot because they have all been where all of us were before.

All of these guys have a way of explaining and breaking down things so that you not only know what to do, but know why it works so that you can apply it to yourself and your avatar and lifestyle. These guys tell you that the canned material they give you should only be used about 6 weeks then you should be able to come up with your own material. This is why the way that they teach is so effective.

In-Field:

I’m not sure I can explain the in-field experience better than anyone else, so I’ll just give a quick recap of what I experienced. First off, the first night they got us into the VIP room of the hottest club in LA. Now this was no easy task, there were over 20 guys and maybe 4 women in the group, so they pulled some strings to make that happen,a nd it was worth it. There were celebrities, reality TV personalities and prettymuch, you had to be somebody to be there, and we got to practice in that atmosphere. MikeyVegas was dead on when he said we owned the club, and that every guy wanted to be us and every girl wanted to be with us.

Mystery was working his game and it was amazing to watch. The instructors told us that is we see them do something and want to know how they did it, to go up to them and just ask and they will reverse engineer it for us, because just about everything they do is internallized and so it is an unconsious process most of the time for them.

Matador was amazing. He would grab some strange, beautiful girl and simply say, “Here let me introduce you to my friend,” to the girl then pass her off on to the students. Set open. Now don’t get me wrong, it didn’t always work with every girl but I was still in awe of what could be done with practice.
Lovedrop has a style his own in the club. There’s not a funnier guy to watch. He was just himself, but by being himself he demonstrated qualities that women respond to. And he teaches the students how to do the same. He helped me out several times, one especially where I got in my own headspace, he helped me get back to normal and begin opening sets again.

The pivots are phenominal. It’s hard not to look good when Kacey and Erica and the other girls are there with you. They have been doing this for a long time and know exactly when to DHV you and when you whisper in your ear infront of your set. They can do it all. When I wasn’t in set, I went back to find one of the pivots to get my head straight and they would help me open a set. I can’t say enough about the girls.
The Pickup Artist guys were also out there to help out. I’ll be honest, Kosmo is the man. He would drag me into set after set and he was amazing. It was great to hear some of the same lines that I had just learned, used by him and see that they work and what reaction you will get with them. Greg, from season 2 was also an all-star in-field. He seemed to always know just when to join me in a 2 set to help me isolate, and he knew just how to do it also. I spent a little time with all of the guys, but Kosmo and Greg were the two that really took me under their wing.

I hate to admit but I didn’t see Discovery too much in-field. I would have liked to have seen him at work a bit more. What I did see looked amazing, he was always in set and seemed to always isolate quickly. When I did speak to him, he was very good about fine tuning what he had seen me do. So he was paying attention to me and saw me more than I saw him, because he was always spot on with the advice.

Like I said much earlier in this review. Mystery never stops teaching. On our way out of the clubs, he was breaking down a set he worked, or a set he saw us in, or what we can do next time to make a set work for us. He is a machine. A fountain of knowledge, and all you have to do is listen and pay attention and he will teach you.

Breakout Sessions:

This will be a quick one. The breakout sessions are like Grad school for college. I attended all of them and they fine tune what you ahve spent the pervious two days learning. It’s like specializing in each field. Each instructor has an area where they excell and this is the time for them to teach you how and why.
Matador said it best at the end of the bootcamp. “I’ve taught you everything I know. Now it’s your turn to go out there and apply it and make it yours.”

This was an experience that I will never forget and learned an immense amount from. I can garuntee that I will be practicing what they have taught us and will utilize it in all aspects of my life, not just for picking up women. I know this was a lengthy review and if you’ve read it this far, I thank you. Again, like MikeyVegas, I did this review as much for myself as I did for the readers. I built a bond with the other guys in the camp as well as the instructors. And I know this may be too detailed a post, so if it need be ammended by an administrator, then please feel free. I got my thought out and thats a huge step towards internalizing the material. Thanks everyone for everything, and if you were there, please let me know if this is similar to your experience, or different, because I want to know everything I missed.

1 Hour to Greatness…. The Power Hour

I was inspired originally on this by Anthony Robbins and have expanded on it since then with my life coach and sports psychology hat on….

How you start your day and the first hour you wake and what you do in it, will set the scene for your whole day’s effectiveness – hence referred to as the power hour –

1. From the alarm going off, get into a routine of GETTING UP WITHIN 5 MINUTES of the alarm – and then 60 seconds when you have got used to this.

2. STRETCH IN BED (muscle stretching gentlemen! your muscles are relaxed now and great time to invigorate with a 3-5 min mini stretch routine – especially around spinal column (where most stress will stem from).

3. Large GLASS OF WATER (not ice cold as contracts digestive system) (the more water you drink smokers, the less the craving – you also need more to flush the toxins out of your body (+smells).

4. Embark on a 30 MIN CARDIO EXERCISE (even if to start is a walk) – I personally run 3 times per week and on the days in between, walk the dog and while it is running around a field I use it to think of words of wisdom to share on my blogs, facebook, twitter etc – share good energy – it comes back to you. You will release immediate endorphins making you feel great, less fatigued (mentally) and stress levels will be lower.

5. IMPORTANT (from the book the Secret) - APPRECIATION – the Secret (law of attraction from the Universe); every morning (ideally within the power hour, while you are invigorating your body, exercise etc) appreciate 3 things about your life and surroundings – don’t focus on belongings – but opportunities and beauty and good alignments – the more you appreciate the beauty and good energy around you in the universe, not only will it make you feel better about yourself, but…. the more you radiate, positivity, good energy in appreciation of what is good in your life, you will not be focusing on the bad AND the universe will align to present you more of the good.

6. READ even if only for 20 minutes, something positive – perhaps the book the Secret, or Anthony Robbins “Awaken the Giant Within”. Get your mind in a positive and positive giving space.

7. GIVE GOOD ENERGY – share your positive thoughts to lift and inspire others (as I am sharing with you right now) – again the more you give out the more you will ‘attract’.

8. REVIEW YOUR DAILY GOALS: Don’t just end up at work and ‘react to the day’ go back to your weekly goal sheet – set a minimal criteria list for the day and some ‘Success’ goals (even if just 2 and you accomplish one, you know you are growing and becoming more successful because of them) – go back to previous days goals – did you achieve all you need to? Don’t panic and DONT…..!!! add all of uncompleted goals onto today – they will mount up and you will resent goal setting – instead – spread them over the next few days, are they really that important, perhaps they can be done next week, perhaps delegate to someone else.

9. CONNECT with someone you have not in a while – there are opportunities awaiting you that the universe is ready to give you, you simply need to reach out and connect to find new and intuitive opportunities to help others and help yourself.

10. ENCOURAGE – I have never had the opportunity to share with you my version of the “Wisdom of Geese”, but one of the insights of geese flying in true formation with common shared goals and support of one another, is that they are always HONKING – make sure today you are honking words of encouragement to others and not something else. You will get it back.

Discovery
Venusian Arts

About Discovery

Discovery is the VA Program Director & Head of UK Training operating out of England. An inspiring International Speaker, he is a leading Personality Profiling Trainer and Sales Guru and has been awarded the prestigious ‘Insights Trainer of the Year’ award against 180+ nominees for 3 years running.

Phone Game Part 6: If You Don’t Get Her On The Phone

This is part six of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

If you’ve messed up somewhere in your game (or sometimes even if you’ve run perfect game and there are other factors in her life that are interfering with things), it can sometimes be very hard to get your girl on the phone for the first couple of calls. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

I’ve seen a lot of talk in the past about never leaving a message and just calling back a little later. Some older community teachings also advocate using a blocked number or, if you think she’s screening your calls, calling her from another number/payphone/etc. I disagree with all of this because, personally, I think it’s really creepy.

Leaving A Voicemail

The way you leave a voicemail can sometimes make or break a set.

I personally like Mehow’s idea of leaving a message but keeping it short and sweet:

“Hey, it’s Kevin. You can call me back.”
“Hey, it’s Kevin. We’ll talk later.”

Keep it friendly and warm, but simple and clear. DON’T do this:

“Hey this is Brian, we met at ____. I was wearing that hat that you said made me look like Kid Rock. I really liked talking to you and wanted to see if we could get together sometime. Maybe I could buy you dinner? Call me back: my number is 555-1AFC. Again, that’s 555-1AFC. Hope to hear from you soon. Talk to you later. It’s Brian, by the way. Ok. Call me! Bye!”

That will NOT get you a date!

Assume she knows who you are (and she SHOULD if you built enough comfort before you got her number) and assume that she will call you back. If that’s your reality, and it’s compelling enough, it will happen.

If She Doesn’t Respond

If she does not respond to your texts or answer your calls, DO NOT keep texting or calling her. One of the creepiest things you can do when gaming your target is to continuously call or text her. Don’t even bother blocking your number either. If she’s already screening her calls, she will figure out pretty quickly that it’s just you calling from a blocked number, from a payphone, etc. Call her from your phone with your number once and leave a message.

I will rarely make a second call the same day if she doesn’t answer her phone or phone back. Same goes for texts: if she doesn’t respond to my first text of the day, I probably wont text her again that day unless I hear from her somehow. Also, because I usually only make one phone call until I hear from her, I will only ever leave one voicemail per day. If you’ve sent her a text and a phone call already that day and she still hasn’t talked to you, anything further than that can come off weird and stalkerish. Leave a voicemail on your first call of the day and then wait for her.

Anything more than this can be creepy and a MASSIVE turn-off.

Also, over the years I’ve seen a lot of guys (myself included, sadly) resend a previously sent text “just in case she didn’t get it”, thinking that even if she did get the first one, she will just assume the repeated text is just a duplicate (people texting from or to people in bad signal areas will sometimes get duplicate texts over and over again with some service providers). Unfortunately, most women know that you’re really just sending her the same message (emotionally needy girls do this A LOT), so do not do that either. You’re not being clever, you’re just doing what every other AFC does. If your phone says the text went through, assume that it went through. If she wanted to talk to you, she would text you back.

Again, I repeat:

DO NOT BE THAT CREEPY GUY THAT KEEPS CALLING, TEXTING, OR LEAVING MESSAGES. It astounds me how many men will fill a woman’s voicemail or send them dozens (that’s dozens PLURAL!) of texts per day if the woman doesn’t call them back. A woman doesn’t want a guy who is going to constantly hound her if she doesn’t contact him. She doesn’t want a guy who is going to “chase” her so much that it borders on stalking. She wants a guy that floats well below her comfort limits and lets her chase HIM.

If you don’t get her on the phone the first time you call her, wait a couple of days and repeat the pattern outlined in the previous posts. If you don’t hear from her again, wait a slightly longer amount of time and then try again. If you haven’t gotten a hold of her after two or three calls (maybe four, but sometimes that can be pushing it), it’s time to call it quits and go back to square one. But before giving up on the set entirely, you can try the Last Ditch Phone Message.

The Last-Ditch Phone Message

The Last Ditch Phone Message (I’m pretty sure I got this from Mystery, but I could be wrong) should be the last voicemail you leave for her if you haven’t been able to get her on the phone. You give her one last opportunity to take a chance and actually get to know you. It should go like this (I basically say the lines below verbatim):

Hey, it’s [Prophet]. You know what, let's just barrel through this. I know it's uncomfortable to meet new people. But let's just, you know, barrel through because this is important. This is how all our loved ones got into our lives, all the people we love and all our friends. Let's just get through the initial weirdness of meeting someone new and if we don't end up liking each other, at least we know we tried. So let's hang out. Ten minutes. Call me back.

Note that this is the Last Ditch Phone Message. If the girl hasn’t called you back so far, there is still a good chance she still wont, but this kind of call to action can sometimes save an otherwise failing set. Once gain, don’t sound creepy when you leave this message. Avoid sounding angry our disappointed, just be confident and upbeat. If you convey the right energy along with that message, it can turn things around from time to time.

DO NOT, I REPEAT: DO NOT sound pissed off that she hasn’t called you back. You should never sound upset that she hasn’t called. If she even detects that you are reacting to her lack of response on an emotional level she will unconsciously conclude that you are over-reactive and needy, and DEFINITELY wont call you then.

Next week: my final notes on Phone Etiquette.

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

Your Hands for Her Pleasure. Part 1

Your Hands for Her Pleasure
Part 1 or 5

Remember the rush you got the first time you put your hands inside a girls panties? There’s no place you’d rather have been than down her pants. The joys of exploring something foreign, something new, it was almost surreal. One thing we may overlook is how excited the girl may have been and how can we help create that rush for her again. She has likely had a few unskilled and rushed lovers in her past. Which means more often than not, women are not satisfied or even disappointed with sexual interactions. With vulva massage and foreplay, act as if you are an explorer uncovering the secrets to her genitals. If you press the right buttons and push the right pressure points, sexual bliss is on the horizon.

Let’s talk about some techniques to give her that same rush and feeling. These next 4 articles are going to talk about vulva massage and digital stimulation (fingering). Most sexual scripts include some type of manual stimulation, especially during foreplay. To be a skilled, sexual lover, it takes the know how and the ability to perform in the moment. I know sex can be intimidating, depending on the level of experience you have or even the attractiveness of the woman lying next to you, but we all have to fight through our demons that affect our confidence. You’re all learning ways to manage the approach anxiety; we have to also learn to ways to manage sexual performance anxiety. One of the most important ways to turn sexual insecurity into sexual confidence is mastery of technique. Behavioral change can implement cognitive change, or learning better ways to please her can help you feel better and more confident about your sexual skills. Sexual confidence often comes from repeated positive sexual experiences, which generally come from doing the right moves in the bedroom over and over again. Hearing that you helped her reach her first orgasm, someone telling you they’ve never been touched like that before, and witnessing a partner lose themselves in pleasure can make us smile, feel good about ourselves, and help us to stick our chests out a bit more. If you know you’re knowledgeable and good at something, you’ll probably do it well and feel competent when doing it.

Some tips before we get into techniques. First, set the stage for hands and fingers to perform. I can’t tell you how many women I’ve spoken to complain about men’s fingernails. Long, uncut nails or freshly cut, unfiled nails have the potential to scrape the vulva and the vaginal canal. I compare it to a tooth accidentally scraping your penis when receiving oral sex. Ouch!

Wouldn’t that affect your ability to focus on the pleasure of the moment? Don’t set the stage for her to focus on a scrape in the vagina rather than the way you’re fingering her.

More nail advice. Be careful with the vulva/vagina massages after hot wing night at Hooters or eating that spicy burrito from your favorite Mexican spot. Salsa, hot sauce, and lemons are just a few examples of things that can burn when exposed to a tear of the skin on the vulva or in the vagina. Ever had shampoo get inside your urethra (pee hole) in the shower? Ya, burning like your penis needs to call 911. The same can happen to her, so keep those fingernails clean, wash your hands before and after sexual interactions, and don’t be known as the “hot salsa” guy to a group of girls. Aspire to be known as the “magic hands” guy!

Find a way to soften up your hands. For those that hit the gym, lift weights, and do manual labor, our hands can go from soft to a rough callous mess in no time. I remember the days of lifting weights and feeling pride over my scruffy hands. Today, I’d rather sexually please the girl than impress my fellow gym rats. It doesn’t feel good for a woman to have rough hands scraping across her vulva. It’s like expecting a feather massage and getting sandpaper. Some options are manicures, wearing workout gloves, scrubbing your inner hands with pumice stone, and using hand moisturizer. So keep those nails trim, filed, clean, and make sure your hands are soft and inviting for repeat vulva visits.

Public service announcement: Saliva just isn’t enough! Think back to the times you were rubbing a woman’s genitalia, digitally stimulating her (ok, fingering her), and the lubrication seemed to gradually fade. What did you do, keep spitting in your hand? Do you think she finds that sexy? Some women produce enough lubrication for clitoral, vulva stimulation and vaginal penetration, but most don’t. Biologically, vaginal lubrication was meant to facilitate penile entry for eventual ejaculation and procreation, not necessarily long foreplay sessions. You will find a great number of women complain about men rubbing their clitoris and vulvas while the surface is dry and fingering her when there isn’t sufficiently lubricated. Don’t blame her or yourself, its nature’s fault for not taking pleasure into consideration. Guys, it can be a lot like receiving manual stimulation. How do you like a dry handjob? Don’t those usually work a little better with lube? My advice: go to your nearest sex toy shop and buy small, individual sized packets of lube. Keep one or two in your pocket at all times in case a vulva comes knocking at your door. Each packet is inexpensive (few bucks), can be used for handjobs and vulva stimulation, as well as eventual (or should I say hopeful) penile/vaginal/anal penetration. Remember, use water-based lubricants, not water soluable (can have oil) or oil-based, as water-based lube is latex compatible for condom use. Also, the word on the street is that lubes with the ingredient glycerine/glycerol can increase female yeast and are linked to reoccurring yeast infections. Check the lube ingredients and ask your sex shop salesperson for help. It might mean the difference between her getting a bacterial infection and you getting a repeat invitation to come over. The next 4 articles will focus on vulva stimulation techniques, clitoral stimulation techniques, vaginal stimulation techniques, and combination techniques. So lets start talking about what our hands can do to get her panting, moaning, and her heart pumping.

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Question and Answer with Mystery Part 2

AFC: Last Saturday I met this young woman and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her since then. She’s the first thing I think about when I wake up, the last thing before I fall asleep and even at that I’ve been finding it hard to get to sleep because my mind is so full of thoughts of her.

Mystery: Please remember that realistically, she is only an OPTION. These emotions are not healthy until AFTER the relationship has started. ALSO, men who have many women vying for their attention would be USED to women and therefore would not go al GAGA over OPTIONS. This makes you look WEAK in her eyes.

AFC: My heart aches when I’m not near her and my head spins when I am near her. Ok…yes I’ve fallen deeply, way to quickly…but I can’t help myself.

Mystery: Unless you are willing to WALK AWAY, it is unlikely that you will obtain her. You will go through what most NEWBIES go through. You will pine for her and some other guy (like me) will slip in a take her from you. The best you can do is become a FRIEND - which hurts even more because you’ll have to become friends with her boyfriend too. Save time by PRETENDING to be used to women already. Be willing to walk away and give some neg hits once in a while. Trick yourself into thinking she is ugly but entertaining. Then you will not let her shit on you in any way.

AFC: And that’s exactly the message I got from her. ‘I’m not looking for anybody, I don’t want anyone in my life right now, I’m just here to have fun’ is exactly what she said to me. It was a good learning experience for me.

Mystery: It’s a good bet she IS looking for someone but if just fed up with the fact she can’t find someone who appeals to her. If you can CONNECT with her, you’d be in. Do 3 neg hits, a connection pattern and some humor like the pull my finger joke and she would change her mind and you would have a g/f who was a 10. And she’d have a b/f who was funny and had a connection with her and confident.

AFC: That’s all fine & good I suppose. But the one I approached had come alone, and had no noticeable friends around her.

Mystery: She came alone to be harassed by men? Don’t you see she’s lonely? No guys try to get past the beauty bullshit and make her feel a connection. 10’s have their own set of problems. It’s not harder to get a 10, only different.

AFC: Getting a flock of women around me in this early stage of my ‘playa’ development was out of the question as well. Maybe in the future.

Mystery: Yeah, this DOES take a considerable degree of confidence. I know, it took me a long time to get this shit together this way. I became a performing artist and this stage stuff helped me get confident with the girls even more. Thing is, I think I’m more of a pick-up artist than a performing artist. I just got good at performing to meet more girls I guess. More options.

AFC: Please….I’m begging for some advice here - I can’t let her pass me by.

Mystery: realistically, with this emotional approach, you ARE going to let her pass you by. Be willing to walk away FIRST. You are only excited about her as an OPTION. Before you met her she wasn’t an option. If another girl came into your life that was beautiful and pleasant to you, you would call her an option too and no doubt your emotions would go haywire. As you experience more you’ll realize there are TONNES of OPTIONS out there. You just have to MAKE them YOUR options. I wager you DON’T get her but if you follow my advice, you’ll increase your slim chances at least.

Good luck though.

Matador One on One Review by Torero

One on One review by Torero

It’s one thing to read his articles about the art of pickup and to watch him talk and teach on VH1’s TV show
“The Pickup Artist”, but it’s a whole other thing to have a one on one weekend with James Matador.
There are many things that factor into the art of pickup and Matador demonstrates them in each and
every one of his pickups. His game is tight and his keen eye to read and respond to the current
emotional state of the room is truly uncanny.

My three days with Matador began on Friday afternoon at the hotel lobby when we went through the
psychology and the theory behind pickup. Why do women act the way they do? What are they looking
for? We covered most of the theory and began with Openers. Matador demonstrated the proper body
language that needs to be demonstrated. “You just need to be comfortable with who you are and show
it.” I asked how to do that. “It’s easy. Check it out”; he gets up and starts walking around the lobby,
pretending to see a girl and giving her a nice little kiss. I looked around and see the people next to us,
the waitresses and the bartender are all watching him. But Matador is completely calm and cool as if
nothing is happening and he’s completely comfortable in his skin and he does not feel awkward by the
social pressure to act “normal”. Later that night went to a club and I met Lovedrop, Rizen and three
other girls who came with them. One of the girls, Erika introduced herself and told me that she’ll be our
wing for the night and therefore it will be a lot easier to open and attract. After about five minutes, I see
Matador talking to this couple. He’s completely dominating the conversation and she is giving him IOI’s
even though she seemed to be with the guy. After the about five minutes or so the guy leaves and it’s
now Matador and the girl. After a couple minutes he brings her over and introduces her to the rest of
our group and moves on the next. That night I opened as many sets as I could and I got one number
although I didn’t feel it was a quality pickup.

The next day I spent with Rizen. He helped me get some avatars and later we covered the
theory behind attraction. We met with Matador and Lovedrop later that night and went to another club.
I was feeling much better and decided to start using what I had learned earlier. I opened an 8 set and
ended up isolating one of the girls from the set. After that, I was feeling pretty good and started
approaching more and more girls. Right before the end of the night I was talking to this hottie when I
noticed Matador at the bar talking to this girl. All of the sudden he picked her up and put her on the bar
and started making out with her. After about 10 seconds or so he turns around and starts making out
with this other girl behind him. Again after another 10 seconds or so, he moves on the third girl. I look
around and I see people watching him as if he is doing magic. My girls started asking me: “Oh My Gawd,
who is that guy? Do you know him?” It was very impressive.

I learned a lot in my three days as I recognized my sticking points as well as proper delivery of the
routines. I also learned that there is no magic formula. You need to be able to calibrate and think on
your feet. Not only that, you need to be able to talk and talk and talk. Be interesting and funny. You can’t
premeditate every move before you walk in to a set.

The good
You see how it’s done. You get first hand feedback where you go wrong. But keep in mind, you’re on your own to a certain extent. You get comments like “Go get a girl and bring her to our group,” or “open the girl next to us.” and from that point on you’re kind of on your own. It’s not like you were wearing an ear-
piece in your ear and repeat the lines as you hear them from the instructor.

The Bad
The cost. I can’t tell you if it’ll be worth it for you. It depends on you, and what you will get out of it varies from person to person. I can tell you that it’s not for everyone. There is no magic formula. It’s trial and error.

Do looks matter:
Yes and no. If you’re good looking it will be easier to open and break through the initial “who the f… are you and why are you here” but if you can’t talk and can’t keep them interested, it really doesn’t matter how good looking you are.

Starting Your Day Out Right

How many times have you woken up and just lounged around in bed for hours on end? How many times have you hit the snooze button about 50 times only to get up at the last second for whatever is you have to do? How many times have you shuffled your way into the kitchen, barely able to do communicate more than a groan as you fumble around with the coffee maker in a half-conscious daze? This is how most people start their mornings on any given day of the week: groggy, grumpy, and half-asleep. The way your start your morning influences the rest of your day. A person who starts his morning in a positive way typically has a positive day. If you walk into the office with a smile on your face and a spring in your step, your mood can be contagious and it can spread to the rest of the office, making the rest of your day a little better than it may have been otherwise. But if you spend more mornings than not staggering out of your room moaning and groaning your way to work in a way that resembles the staggerings and moanings of a b-movie zombie, then chances are your day will not be as enjoyable as it could be.

Look around at your coworkers next chance you get. Notice their hair, their clothing, their eyes, smiles, and their posture. Can you tell which ones just threw themselves together in the morning while they were still half-asleep? Do you look like one of those people? Does your hair look kind of messy? Are your eyes drooping? Are you smiling? Do your clothes look they were hastily thrown on because you barely had time to get ready? These traits are no good at all. If your friends and/or coworkers only ever see you dressed shabbily and looking groggy and ill-kept, you are not projecting the image that you are a successful, happy person who knows how to take care of himself (all of which are DHVs). Remember, the self-improvement that comes from being a Venusian Artist is not just limited to your behaviour in a nightclub or a bar, it needs to be evident in every aspect of your life or you will lack congruence in the field. Nobody wants to be labelled as the grumpy person, the lazy guy, the boring (translation: low-energy) guy. Everybody wants a fun happy label because that’s who you should be: fun, happy, loving and full of excitement. And if you can look good while you are doing it, then it just compounds those DHVs! A good start to your morning can really help make this happen.

So what does it take?

The first step is waking up. Set your alarm for a decent time that gives you an hour or two before work. Studies have show that as an adult your body needs about eight hours of sleep. But really, it’s mind over matter when it comes to this. If you’re having a regular day you can most likely get away with anywhere from five to seven hours. You can eventually train your body to do this every night. However, if you have a full day planned out for yourself you should play it safe and get the eight hours as that will ensure that you are rested and refreshed for the long day ahead.

A major problem for a lot of people with too much free time is oversleeping. The longer you stay in bed, the more relaxed you feel, and while this may be a good thing on a rainy Sunday morning, it can also trick your body into thinking that is more tired than it actually is, making it even harder to get out of bed. You should always try to avoid sleeping for more than 9 hours a night. Any more than that, and your body will start to think that it’s still tired and want to sleep even more. You can actually end up more exhausted by sleeping for 12-14 hours than by sleeping for 6-7 hours.

Avoid the snooze button at all costs. If you try to go back to sleep for more than 10-15 minutes after you have already woken up, your body will try to go back into it’s sleep cycle and want to sleep even longer than it would have otherwise. Put your alarm clock somewhere out of reach. Your best bet here is to stick it across the room. The point of this is pretty obvious: to get your ass up and out of bed and not just stick your arm out to smack the snooze button. If you’re a heavy sleeper, get a clock radio alarm and set it to a fuzzy station with the volume set to max to make sure you can’t just ignore it for a little while before getting up. If you want to even go that little extra you can jump online and buy an alarm clock that will run around the room until you chase it down to turn the damn thing off. Other tricks to getting up can include keeping your window open to allow the sunlight into your room in the morning; our bodies are powered by the sun… kind of like superman to a very small degree. If you’re a coffee drinker you can also try getting a coffee maker with a set timer on it and set it a minute or two after your alarm is set to go off and make sure to not put the pot in, this is a sure way to get your ass out of bed (assuming you don’t want a kitchen counter full of messy coffee).

Step two is setting your mood for the day. Do something productive such as cleaning your room, doing your laundry, writing in your blog, indulging in one of your hobbies or doing the dishes while listening to some high beat, high energy, and high volume music, or better yet, if you have the time in the mornings you can do all of the above. You can kill two birds with one stone here, if you’re cleaning then you are keeping your environment clean and maintained, if your blogging or catching up on a hobby then you are improving and expanding your mind. Once you start getting shit done it can really amp up your state and make you feel productive. Do your morning exercise routine (everybody should have one of these, it could be a jog, weights, yoga, just do something active!) then jump on into the shower. Get a shower radio or even sing to yourself, anything to amp your state up even more, the more good feeling in you the better. Once out of the shower put some nice clothes on, do up your hair and make yourself all nice and pretty. It’s very important to feel good about yourself. Hell, you can even go as far as telling yourself how good you look in the mirror. It may sound silly at first, but positive affirmations like this can really reinforce an energetic, confident state for the day. Finally, make sure that you eat. Your body is your vessel and it needs the nutrients necessary to get through the day so eat up and get the energy your body needs. Try to eat something healthy and avoid the fast-food breakfasts if you can.

Usually in the morning most of us have places to be such as work or school so for the most part this will all be condensed into anywhere from an hour to two hours, all depending on what time you need to leave the house. These are all suggestions for things you and (and should) be doing when you wake up. You will need to make a personal morning routine that fits your life.

On your way over to your destination you should be keeping your state at a high. You should be walking into the door of wherever you’re going with that same good feeling you built up all morning. For some of us it can take 5 minutes to get to where we are going, some may take up to an hour or so, either way I find that some good, up-beat music will help with that. In the car on your stereo or taking the shoe lace express with your ipod or mp3 player, if you have some good tunes pumping you up it will make the trip to your destination all the more enjoyable.

Note: coffee and energy drinks, while not the healthiest choice, can be excellent at giving you that extra boost to your energy levels in the morning. Just don’t go over board on the stuff because they can be addictive. I’m sure we’ve all seen someone we know acting all bitchy and moody because they haven’t had their morning coffee yet. You don’t want to be that guy.

All in all, these are simply guide lines on how to start your day in a positive way. Again, the way your start your day can have a major impact on the rest of it. The goal is to pump up your state and put you into the best mood you can be in for the day. Get up, be active, look good, and feel good about yourself before you even step foot out of the door to head to your destination. And don’t forget to wear your smile when you walk out that door!

- Wild Card

About Wild Card

Wild Card is a seduction writer operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work for Venusian Arts, Wild Card is a card dealer and drummer in a classic rock/new rock band. In his spare time, he takes every opportunity he can to have crazy adventures with his wingmen, Showcase and Prophet.

Phone Game Part 5: Your Voicemail Can Be Your Wingman

This is part five of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

Your voicemail greeting can provide a surprising amount of information about you. What you say, how you say it, and how long it takes you to say it can all DHV or DLV you. A good voicemail greeting can convey value, humour, preselection, create jealousy…the possibilities are only limited by your imagination. It’s like having a wingman secretary to take your calls when you’re not around! A lot of PUAs overlook the usefulness of their voicemail greeting, which is why it gets it’s very own article here. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

Your voicemail greeting (the thing that says “I’m not here, leave a message, blah blah blah”) can be used to convey all sorts of things about yourself. If your avatar is something of the “cool, successful businessman” variety, then you can use it to create the impression that you are a very important person in a business sense (which usually implies that you have access to financial resources – a DHV). If you’re a sarcastic, fun, party-all-night kind of guy, then you can use it to convey a sense of fun or cleverness (both are DHVs). Or you can just use it to convey sexuality and preselection which, needless to say, are massive DHVs.

Here are some examples of possible voicemail greetings:

If you have business contacts calling you a lot on your cell, you are kind of stuck with only a few options. If you can get away with it without anyone asking any questions, make your greeting sound incredibly professional, as if you’re worth a million bucks. Make up a name and say something like:

“You’ve reached [insert full name here], I’m not available to take your call. If this is an emergency, please contact Samantha, she’ll know how to get a hold of me.”

And if anyone asks who Samantha is, you can always just say “Oh she’s someone that works with/for me. You won’t ever need to deal with her though.”

Something like this can convey a lot of value. If you are a person who has someone that people can contact to get a hold of you in an emergency (note that it is implied that the important people will already know her number), then you must be an important person. The implications of this fact can be a great subtle DHV.

If you don’t have to worry too much about your boss or clients calling your cell, you can really go crazy with it.

My old greeting used to say “Hey you’ve reached Kevin’s voicemail. Leave your name and measurements and I’ll get back to you.”

One of my wings has one that says “You got the voicemail. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you. Leave me a sexy message and I’ll get back to you sooner.”

You would be surprised by some of the ridiculous messages we have each received. The trick here is NOT TO SOUND LIKE A DOUCHE. A buddy of mine has one that says “Hey you reached Chris. I either couldn’t make it to the phone or I didn’t want to talk to you. Figure it ouuuuutttt.” Now, if the delivery wasn’t just right on this (or any of the ones above, really) he would sound like quite a douchebag. But he has just the right amount of humor and silliness in his voice to make you laugh when you hear it, so it’s perfectly fine.

This is again a DHV because you are showing a good sense of humor while simultaneously conveying sexuality, and if nothing else, sets you apart from the average guy. If they laugh, you’ve got it right. If they leave you a sexy message, you’re doing it right. If they tell you they hate your voicemail, then you should seriously consider changing it (calibrate on whether she REALLY hates it, or if she’s just shit-testing you). If you get a voicemail from your target that says “You need to change that stupid voicemail thing” in a legitimately annoyed voice, you should probably take that advice.

Of course, the absolute best thing to do in my opinion is to get your wing-girl or a female friend with a sexy voice to record a greeting for you. My current greeting says:

“You’ve reached Kevin’s cell phone. He’s a little TIED UP at the moment *giggle giggle* leave a message and he’ll get back to you when he’s FREE.”

And because I love you guys, you can listen to it here (sorry about the quietness and low quality).

These are all just sample ideas that I’ve seen work in the real world very well, but you are by no means limited by them. Expirement! Try different things. Look for voicemail greetings online and either use them as they are or improve them and use your own version. Just as with any type of routine or gambit in the field, what you do is only limited by your imagination!

Regardless of what you use, try to keep is short and sweet. Nothing is more annoying than a greeting that goes on forever about nothing. Have you ever gotten someone’s voicemail and had to listen to them sing a song into your ear for several minutes before you could get to the beep? It’s frustrating and aggravating and most people will just hang up rather than wait. Similarly, I’ve seen some otherwise interesting people apparently just ramble into their phone for what feels like forever. I called a buddy of mine a while back and his voicemail went like this:

“Hey you’ve reached ____, I’m either not available or I’m asleep or my phone is off or something. You can leave a message but it would be better if you just called me back. If you do want to leave a message though, I check it pretty regularly, so I can get back to you. Anyway, leave your name and number and what the call is regarding and I’ll call you back.”

It was horrible! The only reason that – I – sat there and listened to the whole thing was because I just couldn’t believe that it was still going! But who else would really wait through all that just to leave a message? A high-value HB10 with dozen other guys to potentially call? Not likely! You want them to leave a voicemail, so you want to keep your greeting short and to the point.

Next week: how to handle things if you cant get her on the phone!

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

What’s Up Her Skirt? Part 2 of 2

What’s Up Her Skirt?
Female Anatomy: Part 2 of 2.

We’ve touched on the clitoris, let’s continue with getting to know a woman’s vulva and discuss the labias. There are two sets of labias (vulva lips), the labia majora and labia minora. The labia majora, also known as the outer lips, extends down from the mons pubis on both sides of the vulva, surrounding the inner lips. They extend all the way to the inner thighs and to the beginning of the buttocks. The labia majora, as with the mons pubis, has hair follicles and pubic hair, which can vary in thickness, texture, color, and scent. Did he just say scent? Yes! Although we live in a culture where most pubic hair is shaved or waxed, there are sexual functions for pubic hair. Research has shown that the scent from vulva secretions from a woman’s pubic hair follicles can actually increase sexual arousal for a male through the olfactory senses and vice versa (smell). That means women can get aroused by your scent (not body odor) as well. A little hair can go a long way. The labia majora are also filled with numerous nerve endings and blood vessels. Blood vessels and blood circulation are important because that can lead to heightened arousal. The more blood we get flowing through the vulva, the higher the likelihood of vasocongestion (engorgement of blood) and increased arousal, sensation, and orgasm.

Beneath the labia majora lie some very important internal structures, namely the crura (roots) of the clitoris and the vestibular bulbs. They are important structures because they can be stimulated to help increase arousal. Many skillful lovers neglect or rush through stimulation of the outer labias, which can be a mistake. This is what I meant in the last article by “watering the roots.” Adequate stimulation of the crura and vestibular bulbs through the labia majora can help lead to a well-lubricated vagina and sexually aroused female.

The labia minora, or inner lips, are located within the labia majora and surround the urethral opening (where female urine exits) and the vaginal opening. They vary in size, color, shape, texture, and appearance. They are hairless and are connected to the clitoral hood. As with all the parts we discuss, they have sensitive nerve endings and should be stimulated during foreplay for arousal purposes. In future articles, we will elaborate on ways to play with the labias for maximum levels of arousal.

The vaginal opening, also called the introitus, is located directly south of the clitoris between the urethral opening and the anus. Most of us understand this is where penetration occurs with the penis, fingers, and toys. However, there are a few things about the vagina and its opening that are important to know. First, the most sensitive portion of the vaginal canal is near the introitus. The outer 1/3 closest to the introitus has a vast amount of nerve endings and is more sensitive than the rest of the vaginal canal. Sexological research has shown that the most sensitive areas of the vaginal opening are located at the 12 o’clock, 4 o’clock, and 8 o’clock positions. Think of a peace sign as a mental reminder for sensitive introitus areas. The G-spot, or urethral sponge, area is located near the 12 o’clock position inside the vagina and the internal vestibular bulbs are located beneath the surface near the 4 o’clock and 8 o’clock positions. Coincidence? This is one of the few times I encourage using a watch and thinking about time during foreplay and sex.

As we venture south on Vulva Boulevard, some people begin to become uncomfortable with our next destinations and that’s perfectly fine. Leave them alone and go in peace. There isn’t a rule that people have to stimulate these areas, but my job is to let you know they can also be used for pleasure and arousal. The perineum is located between the introitus and the anus. It is a patch of skin filled with nerve endings and is often described as pleasurable for those that are comfortable with being touched in this area. The anus is another area of the vulva that is filled with numerous nerve endings and can be a source of pleasure for women. Some women are able to reach orgasm from anal stimulation or penetration, which should highlight for you the arousal potential of the anus. Many women feel uncomfortable with perineum/anal stimulation, so proceed with caution. Use techniques like open communication or obvious inviting non-verbal cues to give anal play the green light. In a future article, you can count on me challenging some of the myths and taboos associated with anal play as I find it to be a wonderful place for pleasure and excitement.

Now, we’ve got the vocabulary down. Believe me, the vulva is much more complicated anatomically and we barely scratched the surface, but the basics were important to cover. There is so much we can do to stimulate the vulva; sensation play, manual touching, digital stimulation, oral sex, fantasy, penetration, sex toys, etc. I’m thinking we should start exploring what our fingers and hands can do to get her hot and breathing heavy…

Dr. Hernando Chaves

Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Question and Answer with Mystery: Part 1

AFC: I am not a woman-hater. I don’t want to hurt anyone, and I don’t want to manipulate anyone into doing something she’ll later regret.

Mystery: Nor am I. Others MAY be certainly, that’s not MY concern. You don’t have to be nor do I. We don’t give a shit about the philosophical underpinnings of the WHY. The HOW is all we care about. Cherry pick what is best for you. Remember though, that many of things we talk about are written because they WORK. RESULTS.

AFC: However, I don’t think that sex with me is something that anyone should regret. I’m a decent man. I treat people with respect. I’m honest. I’m reasonably handsome. I have no diseases. I make a good living. I keep a clean home. I’m an attentive lover. I even have a large penis and good stamina (despite a relative lack of experience).

Mystery: You have realistically defined me. The concept of the ASSHOLE getting more girls than the NICE GUY is partly true though. It has to do with self-respect. Women will test you by shitting on you a bit when you meet her and you must not allow her to shit on you. You will WIN by ‘acting’ like an asshole and therefore not allowing them to shit on you. NICE GUYS finish last because they ALLOW the woman to shit on them.

AFC: Considering all the ugly, disease-spreading, parasitic jerks out there who somehow seem to be able to get beautiful women into bed despite treating them badly, I’m sure there are a lot of beautiful women out there who would be much happier sleeping with me instead.

Mystery: The Art of Attraction is an art of the mind. This is not a game of yatzee. It’s a game of chess. The ugly jerks you refer to may get a girl or two (usually ugly girls) but the smart guys understand that behaving like a ladies man gets more girls. By systematic investigation we discover what works and what doesn’t, share the info so we don’t have to reinvent the wheel and get results. This has nothing to do with being a dirty jerk. This is an elitist group. You need a brain. You need to be sober. You need to take care of your body. You need to learn how to be attentive. This is no easy game of tic tac toe. I am a perfect gentleman. Consider Gone with the Wind (Rhett Butler). He was a cool guy, but when the Scarlet acted up, he didn’t take her shit. Self-respect - is that being an asshole? Hmmm.

AFC: My problem is a lack of social skills, if not life skills altogether. (I think a big part of it is that I’m so afraid of doing anything that will offend or upset somebody that I end up not doing or saying anything at all.) I have a very hard time making friends or lovers.

Mystery: You seem to be suffering from NICE GUY SYNDROME. We call them LAMOs. Nothing personal. Here you are such a smart guy, all clean cut and purdy and yet you can’t consistently get women to find you attractive. See? This has nothing to do with natural looks. It’s all about behavior. How you behave weekly to allow the statistics to work for you and how to behave in front of a state changing beauty. NICE GUYS go home alone when the SMART GUY gets the girls. NICE GUYS call the SMART GUYS … ASSHOLES. Funny, isn’t it?!!!

AFC: Despite what I have said above (and I don’t think that this is a contradiction, although I can understand that some people will perceive it that way), I am not looking for a deep, monogamous relationship. I just want to make some friends, have some fun, and have some sex, preferably with a variety of beautiful women. (Preferably simultaneously, but I’m getting ahead of myself here.)

Mystery: That is an honest WHY. Happens to be MINE too. A little bit of QUALITY with QUANTITY. Not overly unrealistic. I suggest you begin by accepting the NEWBIE MISSION.

**SHOWCASE EDIT: For those not familiar with the newbie mission, it is to go out for 4 hours a night, 4 nights a week for a 6 week period, opening 3 sets an hour which will leave you 20 minutes for each set. Bouncing to a new venue at midnight will keep ensure fresh venues with continuous sets.

Routine Stacking in A1 and A2

Whilst opinions differ on the value of having a ‘Routine Stack’ (a structured list of routines), and the mere topic often promotes debate within the pick up community, I personally found having a stack really helped my development in game. For me it was useful to have early Instant Value Demonstration (IVD) and DHV material scripted in a logical order and ready to go, freeing me up to concentrate on my body language, kino, compliance testing and the development of calibration skills.

As my game improved I moved away from stacks, but I still consider them to be a particularly useful development tool for the beginner and intermediate PUA. In fact a year or two back I began to insist that all my new 1 on 1 students developed personalized stacks before I took them infield. This ensured I could concentrate on their key development areas without the variability of them throwing in routines in a random (and sometimes inappropriate / inefficient / illogical) order. This approach tended to work very well for them, so my support for stack use was reinforced.

A well thought out stack can provide rapid DHV uploads, include multi-threading, boost buying temperature, initiate kino, and test compliance all within a short time period and often without doing too much thinking. This is one of the key reasons stacks are useful for those progressing in game. Ever been in set trying to figure out what to say next? Used a comfort routine that didn’t work out because you through it in too early? Stacked multiple openers and didn’t generate attraction? These types of problems can be removed from your game very early on via the use of a routine stack.

For brevity in this article I’ll describe my favored stack format covering Opening and A2 of the Mystery Method, in my next article I’ll continue running through into A3 and include a typical time bridge and number close routine I’ve used often.

So…In simple terms the basic Mystery Method Open/A2 stack format I have used most is…

• OPENER (with FTC and Neg)
• FTC
• IVD#1
• DHV Story#1
• Confirm 3 IOI’s? If yes then Qualify (Move into A3 stack), Or…
• DHV Story#2
• Confirm 3 IOI’s? If yes then Qualify (Move into A3 stack), Or…
• Continue with IVD #2 or DHV #3 and Qualify (Move into A3 stack)

I find that if your first piece following the opener provides the girls with something of value (i.e. an IVD), such as interesting information about them, then they are more likely to hook and listen to your following DHV loaded story. So as an example #1…

PUA: OPENER/FTC: Hey guys, just quickly…Is kissing cheating?
HB’s: blah blah blah
PUA: NEG: Hey, are those real nails? They look nice anyway.
PUA: OPENER CONTEXT: Its just my buddy’s girlfriend, she likes to get with other girls…etc.
HB’s: blah blah blah
PUA: FTC: Anyway, I gotta go, but I just noticed…
PUA: IVD: “Group cold read” - …something interesting about this group, well she seems like the mother hen, always looking after you all, you seem like the wild one…etc
HB’s: Blah blah blah
PUA: DHV Story #1: Respect. Actually though, you remind me of a girl I used to know…etc.
HB’s: blah blah blah

I’ve not included all the details of the routines, you could use any appropriate OPENERs/IVDs/DHVs, its just to demonstrate how despite human interaction being non-linear, you can control where the conversation goes by cutting their threads when they milk your topic and stacking forward to your next piece. They can be saying anything in the ‘blah blah blah’ areas, but in the end I’m gonna get my next important IVD/DHV piece across regardless. Another example…

PUA: OPENER/FTC: Hey guys, just quickly…Who lies more, men or women?
HB’s: blah blah blah
PUA: NEG: Hey, how short are you?
PUA: OPENER CONTEXT: I saw an article today talking about how often men / women lie…etc.
HB’s: blah blah blah
PUA: FTC: Anyway, I gotta go, but I just noticed…
PUA: IVD: ….You have a C shaped smile…etc
HB’s: Blah blah blah
PUA: DHV Story #1: Respect. Hey get this, last time I was in this place the craziest thing happened…etc
HB’s: blah blah blah

Straightforward and effective, first 5 or 6 minutes of the interaction accomplished time and time again.

In summary, its my view that a stack allows you to plan the early stages of your interactions, making them efficient by ensuring the set has heard your key leader/protector/pre-selection attraction material without you having to think too much about how to get this info across. I’ve found this can remove some of the variability of your first few hundred sets and frees you up to notice whats going on with body language, IOI’s, compliance levels etc.

Big Love,

Caddy

Caddy@venusianarts.com

Matador Interviewed at brobible.com

In 2007, when the “The Pick-Up Artist” premiered on VH1, the world met James Matador, the faithful wingman of the show’s host, Mystery. The Matador is a master pickup artist, a co-author of the book “Revelation,” and one of the founding partners of the the Venusian Arts, for which he leads seminars and boot camps throughout the world on the art of seduction. A computer science graduate of Depaul University and former national-champion martial artist, Matador is also an actor, an entrepreneur, and amateur bodybuilder. According to his official bio, he is most known for his “Matador Mayhem” technique, “a process in which he allows himself to be chased by multiple women simultaneously by hugging, kissing, and making out with many women at the same time, causing all the women involved to feel jealous of one another and compete for his attention.”

So when BroBible met the Matador at Marquee in New York a while back, we asked if he’d be up for an interview. He was down, so after a few months of telephone and email tag, we finally caught up with him recently for an hour-long interview that we present today and tomorrow in two parts. We learned right off the bat that although a third season of “The Pick-Up Artist” is not in the cards, a different show with a new angle is indeed in the works. The Matador didn’t want to reveal too many details just yet, but we got him to open up about plenty more.

BroBible: Our readers are big fans of you and Mystery and the rest of the “PUA” crew, and are always curious about what kind of trouble you guys are getting yourselves into. Any recent epic or funny stories that you can share?

James Matador: Sure, I was just taking a flight from Las Vegas to L.A., and I met a girl on the plane, and we started talking and one thing led to another and we ended up fooling around on the plane. And then we ended up fooling around in between when we got off the plane and got to the baggage claim, and to my dismay at baggage claim, she’s like, “O.K., we have to stop,” and I said “Why?” And she said, “Because my boyfriend is picking me up and I don’t want him to see.” I was kind of shocked, because this was something that she failed to mention to me. It’s not my greatest adventure, but it’s definitely a funny one that comes to the mind immediately.

It’s hard to imagine you not slaying every time you go out, but do you have any really embarrassing stories?

When I was just starting off and practicing, and I remember I was testing the whole cocky-funny paradigm, and going out and trying to be cocky-funny, or trying to do cocky-funny repeatings or gambits, as we call it. So one thing that came to mind, at the time — and I see the inappropriateness of it now — but at the time I though it would be cocky and funny to go up to a girl and playfully pat her on the behind as the opener. Well, hey, I thought it was funny, cocky-funny, what’s the problem, right? Slap in the face, getting thrown out of a couple clubs. I quickly figured out that that’s not working. Those were not one of my finer moments.

A lot of our users, when they fall in love, they fall hard. And if their girl cheats on them, or they have a bad breakup, they don’t know how to get themselves back in the game. Do you have any advice for them?

When you fall hard and you have a bad breakup, the world it seems like is coming down on you. And I think that a lot of times you’re going to think, “This is only happening to me, the universe is collapsing on me.” Well guess what, this is exactly how everybody who has a breakup feels. Your body, your emotions are ubiquitous, and we all operate pretty much the same way, with some anomalies. And I think that, first of all, there are girls that I see and girls that I ended up having strong feelings for, and there comes a time when it has to end sometime. And yes, I do go through that feeling of loss, that feeling of sadness, but it’s a state of mind, and it’s how you want to look at it. You can either look at it as a door closing permanently forever, or you can look at it as a door opening and the sun shining through and beyond that door lay all these new adventures, and new beautiful women that you’re going to meet. And new good times to be had. For me, it gives me a sense of optimism to get off my ass or stop smoking cigarettes and wallowing. It’s almost this very normal and understandable feeling of sadness and get out and do something proactive and start creating some happy moments again and start being positive again. And it is tough and it’s kind of like quitting smoking. It’s not to meant to feel good, and it’s O.K. to feel bad but it’s pretty much what kind of man you want to be. Do you want sit there for weeks upon weeks upon weeks or do you want to get up and do something and change the current situation that you’re in? And it’s going to take some discipline and it’s going to take overriding what your emotions are telling you but I guarantee it’s the best course of action. I’m not saying it’s easy, it’s something that has to be done. But I would say that it’s just one out of many instances in life — let’s say something happens to your business where you take a big hit that year. Are you going to run, are you going to hide, you gonna wallow in self-pity or are you going to use all of your resources, whatever they may be, to get up and fucking recover? That’s the way to look at it. You have to fucking recover. And know this: most of the time, when you do go out and you do meet a new girl who makes you happy, who you’re spending time with, most of the time the moment that happens, you immediately ameliorate all the negative emotions you had previously. And I’m not saying jump into another relationship, by the way, but it is healthy to start dating again, to start spending time with other women right away.

And this is no disrespect to women, but I think we live in a culture where love, so many notions of love have been mystified and it’s this mystical thing where we’re not supposed to understand it, that it just happens. But most of the time that when you have a lot of options in your life, two things happen: you start demanding better for yourself, you start realizing that a lot of these girls that you were going out with weren’t as special as you thought they were. Meaning they’re negative personalities, or unacceptable behavior, and I’m not saying all women are like this, I’m just saying that sometimes you need peace in the home and she just won’t stop nagging you. And you overlook it in the name of love. And when you start dating other women, you’re like, “Holy shit, I was pretty understanding, and this was why I had to break up with her because she wouldn’t stop fucking nagging me.” And you’re able to call women out on the stuff that is really not cool, and not O.K. But when you’re afraid that you’re not going to be able to get another girlfriend quickly or the next relationship’s going to come in a year from now, you get that feeling of, O.K., man, do I leave this vessel that I’m on right now? Do I leave what I have right now? I don’t know what’s going to happen. That can be a scary moment. I think the man who has options is in a position to make the most purest choice. Which is more pure: Being there because you want to be there or being there because you don’t have any other places to go?

What’s the best way to leave the girl the next morning and not be a total asshole? How can you do it with some class?

I guess what you’re saying is how to prevent resentful feelings and anger feelings in a relationship. Let’s look at what this is caused by. Anger is caused by a letdown in expectations. What are expectations caused by? Expectations are caused by telling people false statements or allowing them to believe things that aren’t true. So let me say this, that as a good pickup artist, you’re gonna be willing to lose the girl in order to get the girl. And if you have any egotistical thoughts in your head that I can pick up any woman, that’s not a healthy thing to do because it limits you and quite frankly it’s not fucking true and quite frankly you wouldn’t want to. So my point is this: When your skills are at a certain level, you can start screening for the type of women that you want in your life. So what are the type of women that I want in my life? Well as of right at this moment, well, yeah, I want to hang out with women who are beautiful, who have a good personality, who aren’t so emotionally hollow to where they need to latch onto the first guy that they see and their whole life revolves around me after that. And I am very upfront that I am seeing other people, that I do enjoy your company but don’t start asking me where am I going all the time? It’s not appropriate for you asking me those questions — who am I spending time with? Basically, lay down the expectations, the parameters of the relationship up front and center. What happens is people dodge these or aren’t capable of confronting those issues right off the front, so the other person is led to believe other things, aka, having expectations that aren’t accurate. And that’s when you get these really angry, rageful type feelings for the other person, where they call you an asshole and they start bad-mouthing you to your friends, but make no mistake, I never make statements or expectations, like I never say “I’m going to marry you,” “This is going to last forever,” if I don’t mean them, that is. “I’m not seeing anyone else.” I don’t bring these things up necessarily, but I never — I’m not a perfect person and I never claim to be — but to the best of my ability, I never try to be disingenuous in that way, does that make sense?

Totally. That’s the best way, that way they’re not going around bad-mouthing you and you can have fun with them.

It’s not only that. Fear of retaliation, that’s one motivator, but just in general you can still be, if you work on your way of being — and it’s also in our book, “Revelation” — and you understand what you want your personality, your lifestyle, and your identity to look like, you can still weave in characterstics in such a way that you do not have to be an untruthful person. We all tell little white lies when girls ask, “Does this dress make me look fat?” We withhold information at points to protect her feelings but at the same time I do believe you can be a pick-up artist and be a good guy and be an ethical person. There’s nothing unethical that happens naturally.

Another one, this is something that plagues a lot of guys now, the question of text messaging. How long should you wait? Is it a pussy move? What are your thoughts on text messaging?

There’s a whole school of thought on text messaging. I do think that when you are waiting to the point where you’ve already met and separated, now you’re trying to play the game going forward via text messaging, I think most of that work should have been done earlier. I’m not a text-messaging expert. Basically, here’s how all my text messages go. By the time it gets to the phone call or the text message, the girl and I really like each other and it’s a normal part of the process. The text message or the phone call isn’t scary because I’m going to know ahead of time whether it’s a flaky number or it’s a number I got because just for getting for lack of time in the moment or something like that. In terms of contacting the girl right away, I’m not saying being stalky or being needy, but remember at this point, if you know our model in “Revelation,” at this point it was supposed to have been already understood that the girl likes you and you the like the girl. And phone numbers are asked for or contact information is exchanged during comfort building, and what is that? That’s having a normal conversation, that’s having good conversation rapport, that’s vibing, that’s building connections, that’s building trust. And if you have a person in your life like that, a text message or a phone call is the most trivial thing. It’s basically the most obvious of things to start setting up the next time you guys are going to meet up. In terms of timing, right away: “Hey, get home safe, call me tomorrow.” In terms of the three-day rule or six-day rule, yeah, that’s old school, I know it was in that movie “Swingers,” but that’s just not something that we do.

What about as far as making plans? Is it a cop-out to just text her or do you actually have to call her up?

Either/or, it depends, because of the projects I have on my plate, I’d text more than I’d be calling, but if I want to give details… or talk or something I usually call.

Can you describe your perfect wingman?

I think anyone can be a good winger provided that you synchronize with the same strategy, if you will. And if you both respect the boundaries and you both have discipline, and I’m not saying that I do, or Mystery does all the time, especially when we’ve been drinking, but ideally when we see a girl…. Or for example, if I see a girl, and she’s attracted to me, she’s going to be throwing IOIs [indicators of interest] to my friend as well. Now my friend, he can misinterpret that as the girl coming on to him or he can understand because we both follow the same structure that this is normal, that her throwing IOIs to my friend is her attempt to get to know her because she wants to get to know me and my friends and my crew and my social circle. So don’t take this the wrong way to start escalating not isolating with her because that puts me into a position of having to be reactive and chase her, which lowers my value. I wouldn’t be in this fucking problem if you played your role right. And it requires someone willing to do that and most of all knowing how to do that, because I know a lot of good guys out there who are completely annoying to hell and they’re good people, doctors, police officers, but they haven’t taken the time to fully understand. When you really understand the game and the psychology aspect and you understand what your body and mind is doing to you, a lot of the time, I’m not saying all the time, but a lot of the time, you realize why you’re saying this, why you’re getting offensive, when your ego’s talking, when your ego is not talking. And a lot of time, most non-PUA people, they start saying and doing things that they have no clue why they’re fucking doing it. They just think it’s magically all happening. And your sitting there yourself saying, you’re not mad at this person but this person is inconvenient in the moment right now. It’s not that I’m not going to hang out with this person, it’s just that right now, if I go out, let’s say we get a table and I go out I’m usually the guy that a lot of my friends, I’m really into pickup and I’ve studied it for a number of years now, and that’s why a lot of friends will call me up because they’ll get the table, but then there will just be like all guys at the table and then I end up being the guy who goes out onto the floor, grabbing girls, bringing them the back. And if I go out and grab let’s say a three-set and I break them back. One guy starts creeping out one of the girls, guess what, the other two girls are going to want to leave. And I put in 20 minutes or if I really like the girl and we have a connection going, guess what, she’s going home that night and it’s because of him, and he’ll probably deny it the whole way home, and you’ve got to ask yourself, “Who the hell am I? I’m just some other guy? I’m in no position to educate somebody who doesn’t want my help or to give unsolicited advice?” But at the same time, if I pick up the phone to decide who I’m going out with the next night, it’s not going to be that person. That doesn’t mean to say I’m not going to go play a game of pickup basketball with him the next day or anything like that, but you’ve got to know people’s strengths and weaknesses, and what they’re good at and what they’re not good at.

Do you have a go-to pickup line?

Yeah, you know I used to be Mr. Routine. Mr. Pick-Up Line. But there’s good news and bad news. The bad news is I’m not the person to go talk to about like all the best routines in the world, but the good news is because after a certain point, these routines all fall under patterns of mine and what happens is when you start talking this way, doing these things, it starts integrating into your personality naturally so you can spot these things on the fly. You can be dynamically humorous, dynamically intelligent without having a set of routines that are funny or a set of routines that are interesting. So this is the most truthful answer at this moment: At this moment I don’t really use any openers. I go up and I say hello. Or if there is any one opener that I do use it’s a non-verbal body opener; I’ll go up and look at the girl and I’ll do this very overdramaticized rolling my eyes look like a girl’s mannerisms, or do the “Whatever” hand in your face gesture, which usually creates instant laughter. And then I turn around and I’m normal again and introduce myself and immediately start talking and start owning the conversation.

Warm them up with some humor.

Think about it. You have eight emotional dimensions, you know? There’s a fear dimension, you have a love dimension, and then each dimension there are shades of that primary emotion. For example, discomfort would be a shade of fear. Agreed?

Yep.

And happiness would be a shade of love, so most of the time you can look at a person and know what emotion that they’re on with a great deal of accuracy. If you need routines, it’s like in one to three seconds, you’ve got to take her out of discomfort and put her into happiness. An outward sign of happiness is laughter. Now that she’s in happiness and you’re the cause of it, you’re the stimulus, she’s going to be willing to talk to you for another couple minutes, and then if you can keep those core characteristics coming, because you should be working on your personality all the time, she’s going to deduce that you are this type of person. And not to sound cocky but I’ve had people make all kinds of weird statements to me: “Are you this funny? Are you this interesting? Are you this cool? Because you’ve cultivated your personality to where you can be interesting for a good amount of the time or be humorous a good amount of the time on end. And you can keep those characteristics coming to where there is nobody else in her environment or where she’s at that can surpass you. I’ll give you an example. If you’ve ever gone to a comedy show, and you’ve seen a good comic. Have you ever honestly laughed for an hour straight?

No.

Well, I have. I saw this one guy in Chicago and I laughed for an hour straight. It’s a very profound experience, and if you can make somebody laugh 10 times in a row, whether it’s a premeditated routine or if it’s just through your ability to be dynamically humorous, that is going to separate you from basically every other guy in the club. Maybe she’s bored, maybe she’s irritated of all the guys hitting on her, and then you come around and you’re the guy that within three minutes she’s laughed 10 times. You mean to say that you’re not the most emotionally relevant person in the world? Even if her friends want to go, she’s going to want to turn around and ask, “Do we really have to go?” Does that make sense?

Routines are good. I still endorse them for people who are new. However, what you want to do is, every routine, every routine causes some type of emotion to occur. Try to now understand a routine, the pattern of it, and start implementing those patterns without that routine into your personality to where you’re actually evolving into something better, and it happens quicker than you think. Now you take one month out of your life and dedicate it to the art form of humor, and in that one month you’re going to be, and I’m not saying you’re going to be Chris Rock, but in one month you are going to be a marginally more funny human being and be able to give people the gift of laughter better than you were at the beginning of the month. And just imagine doing that for years now. It’s like stand-up comics. You don’t think stand up comics have their routines? Chris Rock — I read a biography of him — he would specifically take his routine to try em out night after night after night. His pacing, his timing, his rhythm, all the stuff is planned and timed. It’s well thought through before he did the show. And it’s worth it. You see him here on HBO, for the last show he did, I think it’s called “Kill the Messenger,” it was some funny, man.

And it was three concerts filmed in three different cities and it was the same routine.

Yeah yeah yeah, exactly, it was a montage. One in London, one in South Africa, and one in new York.

On the topic of New York, South Africa… You’re out in L.A., based out there? We’re sure you travel to cities all over the country and all over the world? Do the girls change at all between city and city and do you adjust your technique at all when you’re in some place new?

Here’s the only barrier that at a certain point things that stop you usually are things that are out of your control like logistical things. For example, unless I proactively smile, or unless I dress in a way that conveys playfulness, personality, a girl — I’m not going to say she’ll find me unattractive, but she’ll definitely be on guard because do I look like a man who is capable of protecting or capable of danger? She just doesn’t know yet. So unless most of the time I can quickly convey my personality, but if there is a language barrier she doesn’t understand the language, it can sometimes thwart the process. So for example, if she’s speaking Japanese, I have to basically alter my — I still stay in set as long as I can take it and sometimes it’s work — but you have to speak in a way that’s a combination of body language and sub-communications and using a lot of facial…. Basically you’re communicating pure emotions, she doesn’t logically understand what you’re saying whatsoever, that can be one problem.

In terms of like Miami versus New York, there may be subtle differences, but some things I’m just oblivious to. Maybe if I really think about it, but I just don’t pay attention to these things. All I know is that when I do go down there to any one of those cities, I have the best time.

Do you have favorite city to party in? What city has the best girls?

On face value, Miami will appear to have the hottest girls. L.A. on face value will appear to have the hottest. And they do have very beautiful girls in both cities. Las Vegas as well, but in Las Vegas, everybody is a transient, meaning they’re coming and going. It’s not like you meet a girl at the Hard Rock, chances are she’s from Wisconsin or L.A. or someplace other than Las Vegas. I have a cousin in Vegas, if you ever spend time in Vegas, it’s a very blue-collar town, it’s not as exciting as the Strip. But what I realized is that in New York, if you know the right people, and you know the right venues to go to, there is a sea of beautiful women in New York. We’re talking really tall, classy, high heels, 5′11″ Ukrainian model hot girl in New York. You wont see them walking down 34th and 8th, you wont see them walking down to Starbucks, you know? It’s like an underworld that exists. It’s not an underworld, but it’s a world where you have to know the right people and the right venues and the right places to go to, but there is a horde of beautiful women up there.

It’s true. That’s why we live here.

I used to not like New York, because I hate the weather. The summertime is beautiful. I didn’t spend that much time where I had any quality friends in New York. But once I got to know the city and got to know the right people, just beautiful women in New York.

Are you spending more time in New York?

I’ll be spending time here and there, maybe Miami. We’re doing a boot camp in Australia, Mystery is leading that one. Didn’t want to go. Sometimes you’ve got a toss up between the work you have on your plate and…. Boot camps are very exhausting. They’ll derail you for four days, because you’re up all night.

Two last questions: Any other advice for our users or words of wisdom?

I would say this: It’s O.K. to be sexual. It’s O.K. to be looking for a girl or a girlfriend or girlfriends, but if you’re not doing it right, then at least be humble enough to know that you don’t know everything and go seek out that knowledge. When I was born, I didn’t know anything about anything. From different people I started acquiring knowledge in different areas. But if you’re willing to learn and put down your cockiness and go to somebody that does it better than you. And I guarantee you that all that effort and time and all that money that you spend on whatever cologne you think is going to work or whatever your shirt you think is cool or whatever bottle service you get because you think some girls are going to be attractive, all that are just things to supplement your core personality, because if that ain’t there, then all of it’s for not. I’ve seen a lot of my clients, my classes aren’t cheap, they’re like 3 or 4 thousand dollars, so the typical student I get went to college and has a job and has a business. These are successful men. So it’s testament to the fact that money alone hasn’t solved his problems for him. So if you want to invest in anything, really look at your personality, your lifestyle, your identity. And treat like that a piece of art and work on it because without that… the most important thing you can invest in is your personality.

Tell me anybody who’s ever made history he’s had a very magnificent, charismatic, powerful personality. Norman Schwarzkopf, Persian Gulf 1, he was the commanding general and he said, “On the subject of leadership, if I had to choose between character and ability, I would choose character because even if you don’t know how to load a tank or shoot a machine gun, but you can command a group of men to do those very important and dangerous tasks for you, they have to want to listen to you and respect you.” So even if you don’t have the technical skill yourself, but if you have the character that other men will follow you, your aggregate power increases. So invest in your personality. And it’s not something that’s handed to you and it’s not subject to change. You can be a better person and the reason I say “better,” it’s not because i want to make a feel good moment, I think being attractive is synonymous with typically that which is the best of humanity. Things like being humorous, being intelligent, being ambitious, being successful, and I’m not saying being fat and being lazy can get a girl, I’ll tell you to go be fat and lazy. It just doesn’t happen. So you’re going to find that if you want to invest in yourself that way, two things are going to happen, you’re going to end up attractive to women and you are going to be a better person. So what’s a better of spending your time than doing that?

Absolutely. And lastly, a lot of people find themselves in situations where they see the most beautiful girl and just want to talk to her, but they don’t just have the balls to do it. What kind of advice do you have for that situation?

Well, there’s a reason for that in a couple areas. The primary area I believe is the ego, you have to understand your ego. Because you’ve created this prisoner of your own device. In some way shape or for, the approval or rejection that you’re about to receive from this woman has some bearing on your own self-image as a successful man, as an attractive man. I don’t have that thought process. If that happens to me, cocky or not, I have the audacity to allow myself to believe, what’s wrong with her? Now some people say what’s wrong with me? Maybe she’s having a bad day. Move on, it doesn’t phase me. The whole buildup of the initial reaction is just not there, I come in and I’m not too friendly, I’m not too standoffish, I’m not 100% normal, at least from my perception, and it’s exactly what they want.

There’s a set of belief systems also that I teach and one of them is kind of counter-intuitive actually but it’s very helpful, is you’re talking to a girl, the last thing you want to think about is picking her up. Because your thoughts will show in your outward actions and your emotions and the things you say and the things you do. You go up to the girl, don’t even care about if you pick her up, don’t even want it, don’t even think it. Just focus on the process in the moment right now. That’s all you can do anyway. But to the guy who’s nervous about approaching the girl, yeah, you’re not the only one. Everyone gets nervous, you have to understand what causes that and don’t let it rule you. Have some control over it. You’ve got to do this in life with many other things: I don’t really ever feel like working out. I know it’s good for me so i motivate myself to get out of bed and do it. I didn’t feel like studying in college, in fact I hated studying in college, but I decided that now’s the time and I went and did it no matter what. I always ended up feeling sleepy or wanted to go have a cigarette or something, but you’ve got to sit down and fucking do it. This is no different. You’ve got to understand, okay, this is what’s happening. This is not an emotion that I’m going to relish in right now, I’m going to override it and plow forward.

Excerpted from http://www.brobible.com/. View full article here.

VA Looking for Sales People Immediately!

We are looking for a number of out-going and enthusiastic sales people to expand our sales team immediately! Here are the details:

Role Objective
To assist the Sales Manager and Sales Director to maximize all Venusian Arts Leads/Enquiries/Prospects to convert as many as possible to Bootcamp training.

Background Information
A unique opportunity to work directly for the hosts of a Hit Reality TV Series on VH1. Our show has generated and continues to generate 1000s of leads per month to learn the skills and secrets we teach on our show. We now have over 100,000 leads interested in attending our training bootcamps. We have employed the help of an Award winning International Sales Trainer, who is looking to recruit a further 5 sales staff from throughout the US to complete our thriving and highly rewarded sales team.

What you can offer

Essential Criteria
• Previous 1 years sales experience
• Able to commit minimum 10 hours per week to sales time
• Able to conduct sales calls between hours of 5.30pm-9pm on agreed dates Mon-Fri, or weekend
• Have access to internet and phone, ideally Skype (free download)
• Good telephone communicator with good sales delivery
• Competent working on own

Desirable Criteria
• Previous 2-3 years sales experience
• Previous 1 years telesales experience based on outbound prospecting
• Sales Person who is passionate about selling and wants to earn in excess of $30,000 pa for only 10-15 hours work per week
• Has a working understanding of using sales databases to record and schedule sales activity
• Good at managing personal time effectiveness and goal setting

What we can offer
• Full and part time flexible role
• Very high commissions on all sales
• Warm and hot lead list, ready to be sold to immediately
• Weekly telephone support
• Monthly Sales Training from an International Sales Trainer
• Support from the Sales Director/Manager in closing off your hot leads
• Opportunity for worldwide travel assisting the Sales Director set up sales teams globally
• Opportunity for rapid promotion
• You get to socialize and party with recognized TV celebrities
• Long term career opportunities

Remuneration
10% on all sales money received by Venusian Arts directly related to your sales efforts

Items required for the role
computer with internet access
Skype account with LA online number
USB headset
location to conduct calls from you home uninterrupted

If you feel you are an adequate fit, please email discovery@venusianarts.co.uk.

About Discovery

Discovery is the VA Program Director & Head of UK Training operating out of England. An inspiring International Speaker, he is a leading Personality Profiling Trainer and Sales Guru and has been awarded the prestigious ‘Insights Trainer of the Year’ award against 180+ nominees for 3 years running.

Adventures in Cuba - FR

Adventures in Cuba - FR

I just got back from Cuba a couple weeks ago. This is the first time that I’ve ever visited not only a communist country, but a country that doesn’t speak English as their main language. Knowing that the primary language in Cuba is obviously Spanish, I pulled out my iPhone before I left…there’s an app for that. I managed to find an application that not only listed a bunch of common Spanish phrases that would be useful to anyone visiting the country, but a voice actually spoke the Spanish phrase in order for the user to convey the phrase as best as they can.

There were a few problems leaving the Camaguey airport. Because of my hair and my avatar I was stopped by an airport guard and I was questioned thoroughly about whether or not I was a drug user. At this point I was a little scared I was going to be thrown into one of those little rooms that you see in the movies and get the full experience of an interrogation. After ten minutes of explaining how I was NOT an avid drug user I was released. I hopped on the tour bus and finally I was en route to my destination in Santa Lucia. As soon as I walked off the bus, I was an instant celebrity in the eyes of the employees that worked at the hotels. One of the bartenders was so fascinated with my hair that every time I came up to the bar he would immediately serve me over the other patrons who had already been waiting. Combining good social vibing and a powerful style will pretty much guarantee that you are going to be remembered by people, especially in a foreign country. This truly reinforces the power of peacocking. Customizing your avatar is an essential part of the game, as well as your self-development as a whole.

The resort was pretty small, but luckily there was some form of night entertainment at the disco which was up and going at night around 11:30. As my buddies and I were getting ready to hit up the disco in a few short minutes, I decided that it’s time to do my hair up for the evening. I plugged my hair dryer into the bathroom socket, and that shit starts making some really crazy noises and heating up fairly intensely. Then BOOM, the fuse in the bathroom blows leaving the bathroom powerless. As I chuckled to myself I made my way into the main room of the hotel. I ask my buddy if there’s an outlet beside his bed for my hair dryer, he points, I plug in and ZZZZZTTTTTTTT. Before I know it there’s a loud popping sound in the room and the entire suite is powerless. As I laughed my ass off I finished getting ready for the disco and we headed out, my hair undone.

We arrive at the disco fashionably late. There’s no trouble getting in at all, and we stroll up to the bar, music pumping. As we are getting drinks at the bar I pop open the first set that I have to the right of me which happens to be a girl by herself. I opened with the community classic “Who lies more” because of how cliché it is and I thought it would be funny. I run the opener and start to stack into an A2 piece when I notice a random dude come up and try to hug the girl I’m gaming up from behind. I played that shit off like I didn’t even notice the guy trying to slime his way in and stacked my material. As I continued talking, the chick literally grabs the guy and throws him off of her and he disappeared into the night, never to be seen again while she turned back to me to listen intently to what I was saying. It was soon after this that I asked her what she thought about something and I muffled Spanish words among the lines of ” Lo siento, non comprendez pas” which is my horrible translation for “Sorry, I don’t speak English.” I laughed my ass off so hard I ejected the set.

I headed over to the dance floor and worked some dance floor game with some Cuban girls. One thing I definitely noticed over there was that girls were a lot more aggressive at getting guys than in any of the places I’ve been in Canada or the United States. There were different instances when the girls would walk up, try to say hello in very broken English and then just grab your dick, or just plain open you BY grabbing your dick. When this did happen, even though I said things like “OMG buy me a drink before you hit on me like that!” and things of that caliber, it was very obvious that they had no idea what I was saying, but calibrating the right tonality, body language, and facial expressions they felt what I meant as clearly as I could demonstrate without knowing the linguistics behind it. Again, this solidified the principles read in Revelation even more. When Mystery says to be interesting, it doesn’t necessarily mean to try and say interesting things all of the time, it simply means to MAKE everything you say interesting by properly calibrating your vocal inflection and your body language in ways that will make you come off interesting as a person, not just bringing up an interesting topic. These key things project a lot sub communications to the girl that is ultimately more powerful than words.

The next day the big plan was for us all to go drunken mopedding all day. After receiving probably some of the worst instruction I have ever seen in my life, I fired up my moped and drove it right through the fucking rose garden in front of the hotel, tearing up a line of roses and bushes in clear sight. As the dude who rented us the moped started yelling and chasing me, I regained control of the moped and took off into the sunset ignoring his cries.

We were flying down these torn up country roads with goats, horses, cats, and dogs randomly running throughout the streets. At one point, while I was flying down the road I noticed the road start to get a little rough. Before I had much of a chance to slow down I hit a huge pothole in the road which launched me up to land in ANOTHER pothole that threw me off of the vehicle into a huge puddle in the road while my moped crashed into the ground. Best wipe out ever! Good times and I even got the deposit back

While we ate lunch when we got back to the resort, one of the girls my friend was dancing with the night before was giving us proximity by sitting by herself at an adjacent table. My friend wouldn’t initiate the chat, saying that it was something that worked for me, but that he couldn’t approach the girl because he was too afraid of rejection. I found this especially interesting because this guy has hooked up with quite a few chicks over online dating sites, though when it comes to cold approach almost every circumstance he backs down because he is too afraid. I explained to him that rejection ultimately doesn’t matter because the girl is really only rejecting your approach, not you because how could she know you? I also explained how I used to be terrified to talk to women but it is something that I have trained myself to do over time so you progressively get desensitized to it. There’s always a hint of it lingering around but as long as you get those three warm-up sets in, it’s on! Regardless of the speech, he didn’t approach, so I initiated the chat. Like most of the girls, she as well only spoke Spanish with a tidbit of broken English. We talked for a bit and we invited her over to our table to chill, she came over and I just started talking. I would say what seemed to me like very basic English statements, most of which she still didn’t comprehend…when it hit me…why wasn’t I using that Spanish speaking app? I whipped out my phone and utilized it to start conversing with her in Spanish. After some chat we made plans to meet up with her and her friend at the disco that night.

Even though I’ve never been really big on dance game at all, I found when I was in Cuba I was doing it all the time, it was an easy way to break the language barrier, and a lot of the times the girls would open you and bring you out on the dance floor. My brother and I ended up meeting our buddy at the disco, where we discovered that the girl from lunch didn’t show up. As I was making my way back to the dance floor from the bar a woman in a red dress stopped me. After a brief chat, she asked me to dance and pulled my ass to the dance floor. As I was dancing with this girl to some intense grinding while my friend enjoyed the same with one of her friends, we noticed that the girl from lunch and her friend showed up!

We rolled over to the bar to refresh our selves when we were approached by the girls who were supposed to meet us there. Instantly I thought a fight was going to get started because the girl my buddy was dancing with gave a shove to the girl from lunch and they started verbally jousting in Spanish. We quickly grabbed the girls and separated the scene by taking the two we were with back to the dance floor. The other girls followed. To spice things up a bit, I told my buddy to do the same thing I was going to do, which was to dance with the one girl, get grinding and do a big roll off and dance with the other girl. When we started to implement this into our game things got incredibly intense. The girls would grab us away from each other over and over and were grinding all over us as if to show up the other girls. At this point the girl in the red dress asked me to sit down and take a break. I’m quite drunk so I’m having an extremely difficult to try and comprehend the broken English. She tries to tell me something here and she tries to repeat it over and over again on account music pumping vividly in the foreground. She pulls out her smokes, shows me and directs me to come outside with her. Once we are out there she gives me a smoke and makes a little bit of small talk, and then she said something I was NOT expecting: “So we go back to your room and go fucky-fucky?” she asks. “What?” I retort. She repeats the statement, and I tell her that I have a friend in the hotel room. She suggests the beach. Something seems slightly off, my spider sense is tingling. Then she says “Come on, how many pesos? How many pesos?” I start to think, Wow my game must be pretty tight if this girl is going to pay me to…wait a minute! I was being swayed by a Cuban hooker. As I laughed I told her I wasn’t into that sort of deal, and that I was a PUA and such, none of which she understood. I ended up throwing a “Buenos Noches” her way and headed back into the disco, managing to lose myself in the crowd.

I went back into the disco to find my buddy and the other girls. The crazy dance fest continued with the girl and her friend which were some of the best dancers I’ve seen. As they were dancing with us at one point they totally synced up with each other and did the exact same little dance move to me and my friend at the same time which was incredibly sexy. This shit was straight out of Dirty Dancing Havana Nights. From there, everything was else was the pretty standard deal. These girls ended up hanging out with us most of the night while I implemented some intense kino and vibing instead of conversation and, well… fade to black.

I’m glad to be back in Canada, and I have really started to appreciate the social settings we have here a lot more. I was also reassured how important body language, tonality, and expressions are in a set, which can demonstrate a lot of someone’s personality. Next time I head to a country having a native language other than English, it would be a good idea to bone up a bit more on the language because although it isn’t as important as sub communications, you can obviously do quite a bit with linguistics to demonstrate a ton of value. Knowing the language would’ve probably helped me avoid the Cuban hookers a bit better too…but hey, it’ll make a great story to tell the grandkids one day!

About Showcase

Showcase is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/content editor for Venusian Arts, Showcase is also currently concluding his undergrad in the computer sciences and is about to start his post grad in network security. When he is not traveling, Showcase produces, writes, and directs films with Prophet.

How to Generate Your Own DHV Stories, With Examples

How to Generate Your Own DHV Stories, With Examples.

One topic within the art of pick up that many new and experienced PUA’s find difficult is the creation of DHV routines. Luckily, we at Venusian Arts can reach deep into your background and experiences to help you bring forward the coolest things from your own life to talk about in set. Using your own stories means they are congruent with you, and therefore easier to convey with good delivery, passion and energy. This article is gonna show you how.

As a re-cap from the Mystery-Method, DHV stories are aimed at demonstrating the ‘key attraction switch’ flicking qualities of Leader / Protector / Pre-Selection / Successful risk taker / willingness to emote. There are others (well traveled, experienced etc) but these are the main things we should convey in A2 and beyond.

People sometimes think DHV stories need to be seriously hard hitting and jammed with very obvious DHV ’spikes’. For example…”hey get this, I just got back from Sydney, well the plane was late and my ex girlfriend, who was waiting at the airport for me was late for a modeling shoot, and already had a parking ticket on her Ferrari” [demonstrates pre-selection].

But you know, demonstrating attraction switches can also be as simple as saying something like “my ex-girlfriend called me, she was freaking out, I mean REALLY scared, so I got her to focus, I told her “listen to me babe, trust me, everything is gonna be fine”” [demonstrates pre-selection, protector and some leader qualities].

“I don’t have any DHV stories” is something I’ve heard more than anything from PUA’s since I’ve been teaching Game. Guess what? you all have experiences that can be turned into DHV stories, whether your 18 or 80. I’ll show you…lets get that grey matter working, get a pen and think of a time when you…

• Had something interesting, funny or unusual happen to you
• Were there for someone with a problem (friend had a dilemma, spoke to you for advice)
• Stood up and supported somebody (it was hard for him, so I stood up and said lets do this together. I mean my friends and I are totally there for each other)
• Calmed someone down (“she was really scared, I told her to focus on me and that everything would be ok”)
• Organized something for friends (holiday, away trip, day out etc)
• Were chased by a girl (“she was bombarding me with text messages”)
• Did something with a girl(s) (“My friend Jane and I went to….”)
• Took a beating for someone (It was gonna be bad, but we faced it together)
• Told somebody what to do (“they didn’t know what to do next, so I told them to…”)

Hopefully you get the picture of the sorts of questions you should be asking yourself, so we should have some stuff to work with now. With some thought, we can move from the output of these questions to a DHV story.

Example 1 BAD FLIGHT: I had some bad-ass turbulence on a flight once, everyone was screaming, very scary. I told a girl sitting next to me it’d be ok, even though I was crapping my pants LOL.

Wow something crazy happened to me on a flight to Hawaii recently, everybody is feeling relaxed, the stewardesses are serving drinks with their fake smiles going on. Anyway, then the plane starts to bounce, a little at first. Then more, people start to feel nervous. Suddenly it all kicks off, Bang, Bang, Bang, drinks everywhere, said stewardess off the ground, people start screaming. There’s a girl next to me in tears, I’m trying to keep her calm telling her it’ll all be fine. She starts to dig her nails into me! Next thing its all deathly calm and quiet. Severe turbulence the pilots said! After that we both ended up drinking our fair share of duty free a. to keep her nice and calm and b. for me to blank out the pain from where I’d allowed her to dig her nails!

Example 2 POLAND NOSE BREAK: I was out drinking with 2 women friends and had my nose broken in a street brawl. Got it fixed, it was all fine.

I was on holiday in Poland, my second home. I lived out there for a year when I was younger. Well I’d been drinking in a bar with a couple of girls I know. Anyway, one goes outside to order a taxi, and the second girl and I follow her soon after. Outside my friend is being hassled by these 3 drunken guys, I can sense her unease. So I roll over to see what’s happening and they hear me speaking, and presume I’m German, well Poles and Germans don’t always get along so a fight breaks out. When the dust settles, the girls are fine thankfully but my nose is broken. I’m like “ok hospital it is!” where the doc manually fixes my nose! Get this, he then takes out a mirror and says “Is that how it looked before? Well I don’t know, so I open the door and ask the girls and they are like, yeah babe it looks as good as before! LOL [ Protector / pre-selection / well traveled]

So you can see aspects of the questions I asked earlier drawn together in a number of life events, then with a little work these are pulled into DHV stories. The two above are real events from my life, about 90% factual with a sprinkling of embellishment for effect ;¬), and have been run successfully a thousand or more times in A2.

The second question I get asked a lot is “how do I bring these stories into the conversation?”. It’s EASY guys, here’s how. I use what I term “lead-in statements”, usually 2 or 3 sentences that can move the conversation from virtually any topic (routine or fluff!) into my story, examples below…

To get into BAD FLIGHT DHV ROUTINE-
I just noticed, you have a smile you can turn on and off on demand (neg)!
I bet you’d be awesome calming people down in a crisis
It reminds me of a time when…something crazy happened on a flight recently….
OR
I just noticed, are those real nails? (neg)
Ooh I get nervous around girls with nails like that LOL
Its just that…something crazy happened on a flight recently….
OR
Hmmm…I’m guessing you work as an air stewardess? Its just you are very well kept…and you have that ‘blonde’ look ;¬) (neg)
I bet you’d be awesome calming people down in a crisis though
Its like on this flight I had recently…something crazy happened…

So in summary, you’ve seen a couple of examples of DHV stories, how to generate them and how to bring them in to the conversation. Of course it takes practice, and delivery is soo important, but this should get you thinking. In future I’ll write about how we weave in Kino and compliance testing into our DHV stories, and remember that at bootcamps we spend time with you developing your personalized DHV’s, then perfecting them with you in-field.

Now I’m gonna open it up to you guys. Post back a couple of sentences briefly describing an event from your life and I’ll turn a few of them into DHV stories. Lets develop some material with which to rescue the bored HB’s of the world from being asked “do you come here often” and “what do you work as” ;¬). Lets do it brothers….

Caddy

Phone Game Part 4: Between Your First Call And Your Day 2

This is part four of my series on phone game.  Click here to view my previous articles.

As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only.  These rules are not set in stone!  You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

Once you’ve built some comfort and had at least one conversation with her on the phone already, it’s time to set up your Day-2. Hopefully, you’ve already seeded a possible hangout when you #-closed her, or at least during your previous phone call(s) so all you have to do is invite her to something you are already doing.

The problem here is that different women have their own sets of social anxieties. Some women will have no problem showing up alone with you and all your friends for some chicken wings, others will only feel comfortable hanging out with your if they have a lot of their friends around, while others may only feel comfortable if it’s just the two of you hanging out together in a very public place.

The most effective approach to this is to give her two options to hanging out with you. My standard Day-2 line is (and I think I got this from Lovedrop): “We’re all doing our weekly wing-night on Wednesday, you should come along. Bring some friends if you want. Or, I’m going shopping on Thursday for a new shirt and you could come help me pick one out.” This way she can choose whichever option will be the most comfortable for her as well as the most convenient (she may actually be busy on one of those days). I say almost the exact same thing every time. I just change out the days and events as necessary.

If she says she wants to bring friends, let her know that it’s fine but make sure you bring some too. Girls and a wingman are ideal here. If you can, try to throw in something to insinuate that you are expecting her to bring her girlfriends, and not her orbiting guy friends (I made this mistake too many times back in the day and it really complicates things). But be prepared that she might bring a guy anyway.

You should also be prepared for her throwing out a counter-offer and suggesting that you do something with her and her friends. Do not take this as an IOD! It is more than likely just a means for preserving her own comfort levels. This will happen from time to time, and unless it’s a large event she wants you to come to, expect to just show up by yourself. And if it is a large event, don’t ask her if you can bring someone, just show up your wing or (preferably) wing-girl.

Just like when you #-closed her to begin with, talk to her a bit more for a few minutes once you set up the hang out and then get off the phone. You can call or text her if you feel it necessary during the days leading up to your day-2, but it is not required. Once again, calibrate it based on the amount of time between your hang-out and how interested she appears to be. You don’t want to be that guy that calls her every day before you hang out just to remind her of the fact that she is supposed to hang out with you (especially if, like me, you set your days-2’s up for within only a few days of your call). But at the same time, there may be occasions when you will need to call or text her at some point (like if there is an extended period in between the conversation and the future day-2). In some sets, if I feel like I need to keep her buying temperature up until we see each other I like to send silly little texts like the ones I listed in part 1. Or I’ll just send her a quick message to let her know about something funny or interesting that just happened.

Try to use your best judgment here. What you will need to do will vary from woman to woman and you’ll eventually just get a sense for it with practice.

When you reach the day of the day-2, you should definitely call her to finalize your plans. I personally never assume that an arrangement to meet up is set in stone simply because in this day and age plans can change instantly and without notice. I always call my target before the day-2, usually in the afternoon if our hang-out is in the evening. I try to keep this call short and sweet because I want more to talk about when we actually meet, but it’s usually best to talk for a minute or two about your respective days before bringing up the meet. As long as you don’t come off as if you are just using filler conversation to avoid bringing up the date (which will come off as insecure and needy), it will help you seem a little less eager to hang out with her. The conversation should have the same vibe that you would have with your friends if you called them up to talk about your plans for the evening.

Next week: how your voicemail can be your wingman when you’re not around!

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

What’s That Under Her Skirt? Female Anatomy: Part 1 of 2

What’s That Under Her Skirt?
Female Anatomy: Part 1 of 2.

Imagine this scenario: You’re bringing a beautiful girl back to the bedroom. She’s naked, lying on her back and she spreads her legs open right in front of you. If you can focus on observing what you’re looking at instead of immediately wiping the drool from your mouth and jumping her bones, you would be looking at her vulva. Vulvas are not Swedish cars known for safety. The vulva is a fancy medical term for everything you see when you look at a naked female’s outer genitalia (sexual anatomical parts). Vulvas vary in shape, color, texture, and in appearance. Each is unique and a blessing to be next to, so leave the comparisons to Hustler at the door. Most vulvas in magazines or porn are digitally/surgically altered and not what women really look like. The major parts of the outer genitalia consist of the mons pubis, clitoral hood, clitoris, labia majora, labia minora, vaginal opening, the perineum, and the anus. I know what your thinking? What the hell is a mons pubis? This might remind you of school, but it’s absolutely essential we go over these terms. What are they? Where are they located? What to do with them? A great lover knows about these body parts and understands their importance as well as learning how to stimulate them. Knowing this information will increase your chances on helping her achieve pleasure and arousal.

Before we start, those that are visual learners can google “vulva” to see what is begin described. Find a diagram that details the vulva parts and refer back to it as needed. Another great visual is at www.3Dvulva.com and click the 3D vulva/clitoris diagram. Learn where the parts of the genitalia are located. You might get a slap in the face from someone if you’re stimulating her anus but were thinking it was her clitoris. Then again, you might get a smile from someone else too.

Lets start from the top of the vulva and work our way down. The mons pubis is a triangular mound over the pubic bone directly above the clitoral hood and clitoris. It is located in the pubic hair region and extends downward to form the labia majora, or outer lips. It is an important area because within the fatty tissue of the mons pubis are numerous nerve endings. Often with sexual interaction, this area is neglected and forgotten as an area of pleasure and arousal. However, during male superior position (missionary), both the male and female pubic regions grind or press up against each other, increasing the pressure and stimulation of the female mons pubis. But we can (and will) learn to apply sensation and stimulation to this region on a more regular basis.

The clitoral hood is a fold of skin that covers and protects the clitoris. It blends downward from the lower portion of the mons pubis in the shape of an upside-down V and eventually forms the labia minora, or inner lips. A lot of guys will think this little flap is extra skin and serves no purpose. However, it is also filled with nerve endings to aid in arousal and pleasure. I wouldn’t bring it up if it were meaningless; so keep the clitoral hood on your mind and in your vocabulary for a future article on clitoral stimulation. Women know what purpose it serves for them and so should guys.

Which brings us to the hood’s closest neighbor, the clitoris. Most of you have heard of the clit, the magic button, or the love nub. In the last few decades we went from a society that had no idea what the clitoris was to a culture that focuses on it. Sexologists believe the clitoris was made for pleasure, as it has no other physiological function. The portion of the clitoris that is outside the body (head/glans and shaft of the clitoris) has approximately eight thousand nerve endings made purely for her satisfaction. 8K!! It packs a punch and it’s estimated the average external clitoris has twice as many nerve endings as the external male penis (glans and shaft). Think about it, twice the nerve endings in such a small package can be an intense amount of arousal in one area. The external clitoris is about the size of a pencil eraser and it varies in size, shape, color, and sensitivity. However, the clitoris is much bigger than most of us think. Like an iceberg, the tip of the clitoris sticks out above the surface of the vulva and the remainder is not visible. There are legs or roots of the clitoris that extend beneath the surface of the vulva and extend downward. That means to properly stimulate the clitoris; one would have to do a lot more than touching the external tip that we’re so used to focusing on. Think of this metaphor. If you were going to water a plant to make it grow best, would you water the leaves or the roots that spread beneath the ground? The answer is the roots. The same idea applies to the clitoris and vulva stimulation. After we cover the external female body parts, we’ll talk about ways to stimulate her different parts, including the clitoris, and tips on how to “water the roots.”

I know you’re wanting to wow your Friday night date with Kama Sutra techniques like the wheelbarrow or the clasping position. Patience, the basics are essential and one must learn to walk before they can run. You’ll be a sprinter and long distance runner in no time.

Dr. Hernando Chaves

Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

The Benifits of Productivity

Before we get into this I want you to ask yourself the following:

How much do you usually get accomplished in a day?

How much COULD you get accomplished in a day?

Two very different questions and, in most cases, two very different answers. If you’re like 95% of the population of the western world, you probably understand on some level that you aren’t getting as much done in a day as you’d like. Most people complain that they are already too busy, or too tired, or just can’t find the motivation to get up and get things done. These are excuses. They allow a person to admit that they aren’t getting as much out of their day as they could without actually feeling bad about it. And most of the time, it’s usually because these excuse makers have become accustomed to being unproductive and simply cant be bothered to try to get more out of their day. Too many people spend far too much of their lives on the couch or in front of their computers where it’s safe and boring and familiar. If you are one of those people then this needs to change. If you don’t get off that couch, out the door and out of the house, not getting anything accomplished then your day is pretty much wasted. When you get into a bad habit such as this, only bad things will arise from it such as laziness and do nothingism (and yes, that’s actually a word). In life we all want to be successful, and success thrives from productivity, because when we get shit done were one step closer to reaching our goals in life. It can sometimes take quite a bit of self discipline to become productive; however, here are some very good tips to help you get started.

Try keeping a day planner, something to help you stay on top of things. Most phones today already have a day planner built into them; this makes it easier for those who have them to stay focused on daily/weekly tasks especially with sound alerts to remind you. When writing or programming tasks or events into your planner you should always make sure to put in everything that should be a part of your daily activities. This could be a scheduled hour to hour plan or even a check list of things to do with your day. Include your work out, your practice session for any instrument you play or hobby you take part in, take pride with what you do. Any material you need to read up on and any other such activities you like to indulge yourself in should also be done every day.

Cut down on pointless, mindless activities such video games, mindless web surfing, and television. These things can become very addictive and when indulging in them too much it can become very easy to waste your time. Instead, try reading, writing or even watching instructional videos. Just do anything to expand your mind. After all, knowledge is power! (Sorry, I had to). Now that’s not to say that you should completely cut those things out of your life, it’s always nice to zone out of reality and go into your own little world every once in a while. Just be moderate about these kinds of things and don’t ever get carried away with them.

GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! You should be doing this anyways. So go soak in some sun, get your errands done, get everything you’ve been putting off done. While your out of the house be sure to make every possible social interaction happen. The more shit you get done for yourself the better you feel about yourself, the better you feel about yourself the more confident you become in yourself. Confidence is key when it comes to your game, with it you can pull off whatever you think you can because you will project it with the vibe you’re giving out. It’s actually quite amazing what a sense of accomplishment can do for your confidence.

The trick here is not to make productivity a chore. It’s so easy to just be lazy say “nah…I just don’t feeling like doing that today.” But this isn’t really helping anything, now is it? You should never feel like you are doing a task or errand against your will. You need to approach these sorts of things from a positive mindset. You should want to get X done, Y sent, and Z put away. You need to feel good about it. At the end of the day you should get into the habit of patting yourself on the back for getting as much done as you did. If you approach your daily tasks from this perspective, you’ll inevitably catch yourself saying “Man, I cant believe how much I got done today!” because you feel so good about it. Even if all you did was run around and do a bunch of tiny errands or worked all day on finishing one big project, you will actually feel better about yourself simply because you were productive, and that can really help your state in the field. Moreover, feeling good about accomplishing something will actually positively reinforce your desire to be productive in the first place, making productivity rather addictive if you approach it with that kind of mindset. So the more productive you are, the more you will find yourself WANTING to be even more productive.

All you have to do is stop yourself from being lazy and this sense of accomplishment will perpetuate itself for as long as you’ll let it.

But although it feels good to get things done, there’s more to this than just feeling good about being productive. You are now taking action in your life. You are getting things done and getting shit handled. If you’ve set some goals for yourself, then every completed task and finished errand gets you closer to those goals, even if only indirectly. Any progress in your life will bring you closer to your life’s goals and dreams. The more you work at things the better you get at them. So don’t be a waster of time, be productive, get shit done and you will be seeing results in yourself in no time at all. Most of all, remember to keep smiling.

- Wild Card

About Wild Card

Wild Card is a seduction writer operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work for Venusian Arts, Wild Card is a card dealer and drummer in a classic rock/new rock band. In his spare time, he takes every opportunity he can to have crazy adventures with his wingmen, Showcase and Prophet.

Unbreakable

Unbreakable

When I teach pick up, I prefer to do it over months.  This allows me time to get to know the student and really get in their heads and know everything I can.  The additional time also allows me to use some unorthodox tactics in teaching people.  One of the things I do is make the students watch particular movies and tell me what the pickup lesson was to the movie.  I never tell people what they are supposed to be looking for or learning, I make them tell me after the fact.  Often they don’t get the point, unless the point is a hardcore sticking point for them and smacking them in the face.

One of the movies that I use is the M. Night Shyamalan movie “Unbreakable”.  Most people consider his pinnacle of work to be “The Sixth Sense”.  I respectfully disagree.  The movie opens with David Dunn (played by Bruce Willis) who has extraordinary abilities that he is unaware of, and is living a very mundane life.  His life is in shambles:  His kid doesn’t respect him, his wife and he are on the rocks, and he is in a dead end job.  At one point, David describes his empty life as “waking up every morning with a great sadness.”

Elijah Price (played by Samuel L. Jackson) believes that he has found the purpose of David.  He was meant to save other people as a super hero.  David is of course initially resistant and unbelieving in his own abilities (ie. Shitty Inner Game).  Elijah spends most of the moving getting David to believe in himself and to realize his purpose.  When David finally does accept his path and begins doing what he was meant to do, his life becomes much better.  When asked about his sadness in the mornings, he says that it has gone.

There are a lot of movies that show a character going through changes and discovering their purposes.  This one for me is so powerful because it describes EXACTLY how I used to feel when I was married and working in a chemical plant.  Every morning I woke up miserable.  I hated my job and everything about it.  Every day was a struggle to go to work.  In the beginning this sadness just came in a small dose of longing for something else that I was never able to describe.  Eventually toward the end I had to talk myself every day out of calling into work sick or taking a vacation day.  The one thing that made me continue on was my love for my then wife.  Oh I hid it well, but inside but inside I was dying.

Then something happened that changed everything: I got laid off.  Like most people, at the time I defined myself by what I did for a living.  It was who I was and I considered it my purpose.  The problem was, it really wasn’t my purpose and I hated it (and by proxy my life).  When the employees were told of the layoffs, I was mired in self pity for a brief time.  Eventually one of the employees told me while I was whoa is me-ing “Go be a teacher.  You come in here every day telling us useless shit that none of us here care about.  Go tell some kids.  They probably won’t care either, but at least they will take notes.”  Initially I felt insulted.  I often felt out of place at work, but I didn’t like it being thrown in my face.  The fact was I was very out of place.  I was not content just to go to work and survive and be contained in a little bubble.  My soul wanted more.  My co-workers were different.

I took my co-worker’s advice and did indeed become a teacher (although I needed far more than just his advice to actually do that.  I’ll tell those stories another time though).  Once I was on the path to being a teacher an interesting thing happened:  No more morning sadness.  Because I found my purpose, like David Dunn, I am unbreakable.  You can be as well when you find your place in the world.  Before even attempting to find a woman, you should first find yourself.

—-Knack

About Knack

Knack is a VA Coach and a world traveler. Knack is an elementary school teacher, and uses his background as a professional educator to take a student specific approach to teaching pick up. He has picked up various languages throughout his journeys and travels to three or four new countries per year in his quest to experience various cultures.

Field Report #1: Party of Five (Matador + Four Girls) February 2009

Field Report #1:Party of Five (Matador + Four Girls) February 2009

What happens when Matador and four girls get together, don’t you want to know…..Guess what I am going to tell you.

I arrive at Matador’s pad in the “Beast” a.k.a. my Range Rover and meet up with Kevin Feng, his girl B and walk in the door simultaneously with four lovely ladies all coincidentally with names that begin with the letter E. The night begins with a bevy of women plus Matador hopping in the Beast and driving out to Ecco where Erika has “greased the ropes” for us with one of her many promoter friends.Within minutes we have a table and bottle service on the way. The club is fairly empty as we arrive for once at a decent hour. Matador debriefs me on the game plan for the night. His plan involves him and three girls. My part of the plan involves me playing wingman for the “mother hen” of the group. As I surmise as to how all this will go down tonight I multitask by immediately engaging my target as the proper wingman should. I keep the girl, E1 we’ll call her, busy while Matador escalates on her friend E2. E3 and E4 go off to the dance floor and before I can blink while talking to E1 I see the club has filled up with beautiful women. A large, beautiful assortment has somehow congregated around our table area within the blink of an eye. A year ago I would have thought this to be too hot to handle but I shrug it off as this has become status quo when hanging with Mystery and Matador. I continue on my wingman journey while Matador continues on the mission of bringing 3 women to his bed that night.

Somehow Kevin and B have disappeared and the clock is already near 2. Time flies when you sarge-hard. Before I know it the girls are back in the car. After a quick stop at Wendy’s to feed we headed back at Matador’s place. Before I can sneeze, Matador and 3 of the girls have disappeared. I hear giggling in the bedroom. E1 is still in the living room with me. I keep her busy while I hear a bevy of sounds. I look up to see a shirtless Matador come out for a few seconds chuckle, point to his room where 3 naked women are laughing and watch him disappear back into the beyond. After a few hours I am tired and E1 starts to get antsy to leave. She clucks like a mother hen does and pulls her chick out of the roost after a few hours of my attending to her. The weary wingman must retire but Matador well he continues on the Matador way as anyone who knows him can testify and surely was up all night long doing gosh knows what. You can read the field reports in Revelation and learn the techniques to make this happen but the actual experience is far more exciting than you know till it actually happens.

Simeon
Venusian Arts

About Simeon

Simeon is a VA Coachoperating out of California. After winning the title of Master Pick-Up Artist on Season 2 of VH1?s The Pick-Up Artist, Simeon has chosen to further his training with Mystery and Matador as he continues the everlasting journey of improvements in the pickup arts. Now he has chosen to give value to others by teaching the arts that have so dramatically transformed his life so that others may share in the enjoyment that pickup creates through the rigorous but rewarding journey of pickup artist training provides.

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 4

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 4 of 4
Lip locking and tongues

Kissing is one of the most important aspects of foreplay.  Make no mistake, a good kiss can mean the difference between playing with someone else and playing with yourself.  It’s hard to believe that in some remote cultures, they find kissing to be taboo and disgusting.  Luckily, kissing is something we can learn and acquire the skills to improve.  Women rate kissing as one of the most erotic activities they engage in during sexual interaction.  Case in point.  A friend of mine was out to dinner on a first date with a girl.  They eventually leaned into each other for their first kiss.  After their inaugural smooch ended, she kept her eyes closed and was smiling.  She said that was the kind of kiss she was hoping for.  Her next question, “What do you want to do right now, honestly.”  His answer was to skip the movie and take her home to make love, which they did.  That must’ve been some kiss!

Since kissing is so powerful for women, men should take it seriously and cover all the stops.  First, make sure your breath isn’t going to wilt a plant.  A breath mint might not be enough if you’ve just had garlic shrimp and coffee for dinner.  Make it a habit to carry a mini travel size bottle of mouthwash in your pocket or car.  It just might save your night.  The proper technique for kissing can vary from person to person, so let’s go with the best odds women have identified.  The majority of women are fans of limited tongue use.  Guys, there’s no need to play tonsil hockey.  This is not an anatomy class or a sport, it’s kissing.  Light tongue is okay for some, but test the waters before you jump in. Most women want passion, but that does not imply forceful lip locking.  Keep the intensity to a level that is not too aggressive, but definitely not passive.  My best advise is to use a technique called mirroring.  Do what she does and mimic her levels of sucking, pressure, and tongue use.  Most people would like someone who kisses like they do and focuses on similar areas of kissing.

Start off relaxing your own lips.  Depending on if you’re giving a gentle kiss or a firm, passionate kiss, your approach and technique will vary.  Women enjoy both styles, but it’s safer to begin with the gentle and work your way up to the more intense.  Be aware that opening your mouth can be a good thing in moderation, just enough to fit tongues and lips.  The excessively open mouth can feel rigid and overwhelming.  A good technique to learn is lip kissing.  Begin to gently kiss and suck her lips.  Women enjoy lip sucking, both the top lip and the bottom.  Be careful of how hard you suck and of biting the lips.  Be mindful of your noses and how your head is positioned.  Often people will tilt their head enough to compensate for their noses.  Generally, it’s not a good idea to change up what you’re doing too often.  Someone whose kissing style is all over the place appears too excited, anxious or nervous.  Be consistent with kissing, meaning try not to sloppily kiss all over the place.  However, using different techniques and styles sparingly is definitely encouraged.  Use limited amounts of saliva.  Make sure you swallow your spit and keep most of it in your mouth.  One of the biggest complaints by women is the intensity of men kissing and the amount of saliva they deposit in women’s mouths.  Breathe in and out through your nose while kissing.  You can also develop ways through practice to breathe through your mouth in between kisses where you’re not breathing directly on her.  As for your hands, many of us might feel the desire to feel her up and start inching towards the forbidden zones.  Personally, I prefer not to have my hands wandering too much in order to give a female the opportunity to really focus on the kisses.  I don’t want her mind going from passionate and stimulating kissing to wondering if I am going to touch her somewhere she’s not ready for.  If she starts touching you in ways that belong in an x-rated movie, by all means, mirror those behaviors.  That’s a good sign she’s comfortable and aroused.  Remember, foreplay is about reducing anxiety and increasing arousal.  During kissing can be a good time to use body massage techniques with your hands.  You can rub and stimulate her back, shoulders, thighs, neck, head, and other areas that feel good.

Most people will tell you, kissing takes practice.  No one starts off naturally knowing everything about sex, kissing, and foreplay.  Hang in there.  The knowledge is coming; hopefully the experience is as well.  My advice to you is learn as much as you can about sex techniques and pleasing a woman.  When you feel confident in your studying of human sexual behavior, put what you have learned into practice.  Get out there and experience what life, dating, and sex has to offer.  So keep masturbating her mind, caressing her body and softly kissing her.  You’re on your way to becoming a better lover!

Dr. Chaves

Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Classic FR: Thursday Night with Mystery Fall 1998

Living vicariously with Mystery …
Alrighty gents, I got a call today at 1:30pm from the voluptuous girl from the party last week. Her name is … um, Annette. Sure. OK, so Annette (A for short) calls me because my last email to her had her asking her to call me. I left my # with her. So she did. She talked for about 10 minutes about anything but sex - in fact, I chatted like she was my good friend and we just shot the shit. I then said, come over. So she said she would come over after work. I tidy’d up and then at 7:30pm she called saying she was on her way over while I was talking to my buddy Tal. So she arrived and came to my bedroom where my computer was. she sat beside me on the bed and I played her an mp3 file I ripped off a CD. It was a folk song and I made her listen to it with her eyes closed. This changed her state to one of connection … as the song was called The Turtle Valley Snow. I then played some depressing songs (but really good ones) like from Counting Crows and this made it all serious in the room. I then played some fun fast stuff.

We talked about my computer and my favorite music and then talked about science for a bit … cosmology and mortality. We enjoyed each others company. I then got real close to her and as we were talking I kissed her neck. It was very natural. I talked some more and kissed some and then asked if she liked getting her neck bitten. She said yes so I did. I then asked her to stick her tongue out and I sucked on it. Ok, so we goofed happily (top off tits sucks, my shirt off nippled bitten, I kissed her ass and licked her everywhere … but … and she was very embarrassed about this …she was on her period and didn’t mean for us to get this far. So I said, hey its natural and we just played kissy and bitey and touchy. I rubbed her pussy from the outside of her panties and kissed her stomach and tongued her belly button. We massaged each other and rubbed and scratched but didn’t DO the sex thing. It was ok though. I am a man of CONTROL!!!!!! I am the master of my domain. King of the castle. So at 11pm she got dressed and we had dry humped each other and really had some CLEAN fun. I would have LOVED to cock her but she wasn’t able to due to nature issues nor did I have any co0ndoms here so it was fine. I would have liked a blow job though but that’s a little one sided for the first time. I COULD have talked her into it I’m sure but I would like to set this up for some longer term fun. Im not a very selfish person. We enjoyed each other tonight. I walked her to her car holding hands and we were all kissy kissy. I mean kissy! We were very good together. It was all good.

As a side note to those who haven’t been with a girl in a while. It’s worth it dude! Just TRY and fail and try and fail and try again. And then when a girl DOES accept you, and you are with her snacking on her tits, your eyes all glassy and you are totally immersed in tits, your ego is satiated. You feel so good. It’s a woman. Feminine creature. Her smell, her softness, the feel of the back of her head - her soft hair, her belly button, taking a bite out of her ass. A warm wet tongue in your mouth. Fuck, its so … natural. EVERYONE should have this connection with a girl … every DAY! I need more. Too bad she couldn’t stay the night. Too bad she wasn’t off her period. Too bad I didn’t have condoms. Too bad it wasn’t the weekend. Good news is, I KNOW FOR 100% FACT that she and I will see each other again and YES the sex will be good. I KNOW this. We did almost everything except the actual cock out of pants pussy in open air DO! Another time. I want things to be right.

She drove off with a smile on her face. I went back into my apartment with a smile on mine Mmmm …. I LOVE women!

More on Opening

More on Opening

In my previous article I talked about opening. One of the important things I did not mention is that I think it is important to stay completely sober when you game and not drink at all. Many guys have liquid courage and can only approach or game while drinking. This is a huge crutch because you will condition yourself to only being able to game when you are drinking. Then you might have trouble running day game or be uncomfortable in environments where alcohol is not involved. Also, alcohol gives everyone bad breath and that can instantly blow a set. Another tendency guys tend to have is holding their drinks up to their chest when they are drinking. This is closed off body language and every AFC in the club does this. Do not be that guy. If you have a drink, or water, hold it down at waist level at all times.

Opening in a loud club can be quite challenging. You must talk loud enough so you are heard without shouting to the point where you sacrifice too much vocal tonality. A good way to get the sets attention is to gently tap them with the outside of your hand to initiate kino. They will turn into you and then you can run your opener.

I use different openers at the clubs than I use during the day. I use very short openers in the clubs because it is so loud and people have short attention spans and there is so much other stimulation out there that you have to get someone’s attention quickly.

It is good to have several different openers ready to use. You need one to open the set, one to merge sets and one in case you need to handle an interrupt. I have a default opener and two backup openers. My default opener is Mystery’s 80s song opener. Since this is not really an opinion opener, I still use it frequently. I find this opener is great on both mixed and all female sets and people also laugh if you intentionally sing out of key.

Here is the dialogue I would say when using this opener:

Hey Guys, 80s song, I heard this on the radio today! I cannot get the song out of my head! Who sings this song, you spin me round, round baby, round, round, like a record, baby round….

If they do not know, I sometimes throw in a neg like, a lot of help you are!

I will then say, well my mom thought it was Lionel Richie, but I do not think it is Lionel Richie. A lot of younger women ask who is Lionel Richie, so then I neg them again and say, Lionel Richie is a singer, Nicole Richies dad! HEEEELLLOOO! This will get several laugh tracks. I say the opener with enthusiasm, and a lot of energy, as I try to sing it, intentionally off key to make it funnier, but I really do not care if they know the song or who sings it. The only purpose of my opener and any opener is to open the set, so I can transition directly into A2.

-Hawaii

About Hawaii

Hawaii is a VA Coach operating out of Las Vegas. He has instructed at nearly fifty (50) live bootcamps and seminars and trained hundreds of students over 3 years working for Mystery. He traveled with Mystery and Matador for more than a year and taught at over 25 bootcamps as an approach coach during his training period before becoming a lead instructor at over a dozen bootcamps. Not the typical player, Hawaii is a short, skinny, 30-something, average looking Asian guy, former accountant, who transformed himself into someone who is successful with women after years of practice working thousands of sets. Hawaii is Mystery's former Personal Assistant and has been working with him for 3 years since August 2005. In addition, Hawaii trained all of the students on season 2 of VH-1's The Pickup Artist as an off-camera Instructor for the entire duration of filming.

Phone Game Part 3: If She Calls You

This is part three of my series on phone game.  Click here to view my previous articles.

If your game is tight, and you follow the guidelines I outlined in my previous articles on texting and calling the women you meet, you’ll find that a surprising number of them will call you faster than you may have previously thought (make sure you TRADE numbers when you close her).  As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only.  These rules are not set in stone!  You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

If she calls you, there are a number things to be mindful of such as your current circumstances, at what stage you are in the set, and what you think will work best with her.

First, make sure you don’t pick up on the first ring. The right time to answer is on the third ring. This can be hard to gauge if you have custom ringtones and such on your cell (and who doesn’t these days), so just wait a few seconds before you answer. I personally like to sing aloud with whatever ringtone I have assigned to the woman in question for a few lines because it ups my energy level when I answer the phone. It sounds silly, but no matter what else is happening, it always means that I answer the phone with energy.

When I answer the phone I typically just answer it with an enthusiastic and warm “Hello!”, or by calling her by her nickname: “Hello darlin’, how’s my Attack Kitten today?”. Depending on your identity, you may want to answer the phone with something different. If we already have inside jokes, I’ll sometimes answer the phone with a reference to that (so I would literally pick up the phone and say something like “I just swam here from FUCKING Pittsburg!”). My wing Wild Card, who has a very flamboyant and zany personality will always answer with “You’ve got GREG!” while a more professional person might answer with a professional “Brian Richards speaking”, as if they are expecting one of their million dollar clients to be calling them. This all depends on your avatar and personality. Just don’t make it sound corny or childish if that kind of humor isn’t part of your game.

Another thing that I think a lot of people don’t consider is how enthusiastic you sound when people call you. When your friends and girlfriends call you, its good social vibing to sound enthused that they called. Have you ever called up one of your buddies and had him sound almost annoyed that you called him? This is bad vibing. You’re calling up your friend to chat or invite him out, and not only isn’t he glad to hear from his so-called friend, but he actually sounds annoyed that you called! And he may not even realize that he’s being like this. He really could be happy to hear from you, but he’s just not showing it in his voice. There’s no energy, no inflection, no enthusiasm. You need those things when you answer the phone regardless of it’s your target, your wingman, or even your mom.

If your target calls you, it is an IOI. If you don’t accept that IOI and she gets a negative vibe from you, you will be reinforcing the idea that you don’t want her to call you. Now, I don’t know about you guys, but I want my targets to call me. I want them to send me funny little texts and call me to shoot the shit and invite me to hang out. Hell, I want them to call me when I’m out with other girls so I can build some jealousy. It makes your job a hell of a lot easier when they call you, so make sure you are happy to hear from them when they do!

Note: that doesn’t mean act supplicative and needy when she calls you. Don’t be like “OMG I’m so glad you called, I was just thinking about you last night and it’s really good to hear from you…” Instead, sound like “Hey babe! How are you? … Awesome! I’m fabulous as usual! I’m heading over to meet my friend Kayla, we’re going shopping to find me a top hat! What have you been up to?”

Now, once you answer you have the option, depending on what you are personally doing at the moment and what you think she would respond most positively to, to get involved in a conversation or to simply say “I’m kind of in the middle of something at the moment. How about I call you back [in an hour/this afternoon/tomorrow/whatever]?”

For instance, if I’m with a bunch of friends and we’re all hanging out and having fun, I’m not going to stop what I’m doing to talk on the phone. I’m going to say “Hey, how’s it going? Awesome! Listen, I’m out with some friends at the moment. How about I call you when I get home?” Or if she just has something quick to say, I’ll tell her “Ok, but I can’t talk long my friends are waiting on me.” This can be a very powerful thing to do every now and then because it conveys non-neediness and shows that you are a social person.

Alternatively, you don’t even necessarily HAVE to answer at all. If you are genuinely busy with something/someone, or you really just don’t feel like talking, don’t pick up and call her back later.

If you miss her call or just decide not to pick up, be sure to wait a little bit before you call her back. Unless you are both in a rush for some reason, ten minutes should be the minimum, but you could realistically wait for hours or days depending on the situation. Once again, you have to calibrate based on the situation.

If, for whatever reason, she doesn’t get you on the phone, you should make sure she has the option of leaving you a voicemail. This way you can check it whenever is most convenient for you and decide when you should call her back. You voicemail can also be very useful way to convey a little more of your personality. We’ll cover that in a couple weeks!

Next week: how to handle the time between your first call and you day-2!

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

Lovedrop’s Violation Theory

Craig once said that “It’s Always On.” My thoughts on this (why it is true) are,

While gaming, whenever escalation is possible, continue escalating AS A RULE. Ignore her non-committal behavior; she WILL act non-committal in order to handle her own ASD. She has to do this (explained below.) Just continue to plow in a non-needy way.

Women will act non-committal due to the sexual non-responsibility rule (a.k.a ASD), but subject to appropriate gaming they will continue to display passive IOIs such as allowing the gaming to continue, and allowing escalation (but acting like it’s weird in order to avoid responsibility/ASD.)

Have you ever been gaming a girl, and she has a weird smile on her face, with her eyebrows up, like she thinks you’re being weird? But at the same time, she continues to show passive IOIs. And also she doesn’t contribute that much, forcing you to carry most of the interaction. But she goes along with it. Players can miscalibrate this because of her weird look and her non-investment, they decide that she is being “a bitch” and they say “whatever fuck it then, I don’t care” when they actually could have kept plowing and got the girl.

This is interesting because ASD theory thus predicts the necessity of plowing. Plowing is also the accepted solution to token resistance, which is itself merely a more energetic form of this same passive IOI mechanism. Thus Token Resistance can be interpreted as an IOI. If she feels it necessary to begin avoiding responsibility for something that she feels inside, and she telegraphs this feeling via token resistance behavior, can’t we then take it as an indicator?

Some new terms:

Predictive Resistance: This is similar to token resistance, except she volunteers it without prompting. (Usually token resistance is thought of as a RESPONSE to some compliance test from the player.) Example: “I hope you know we’re not having sex tonight.” Why would she say this unless she is feeling ASD? And if I am not currently escalating, how does she feel ASD? Because she is getting excited and thus feels the need to avoid responsibility for it. This is how ASD gets activated. This is also WHY we have traditionally known that predictive resistance is actually an IOI from the girl. Girls don’t say that sort of thing to beggars on the street. They say it to hot guys when they are sitting on their couch together.

This is also why false disqualifiers work…because they eliminate her need to avoid responsibility and thus DEACTIVATE ASD.

Plowing is necessary yet so is flipping the script. You must do both.

Indicators: There are IOIs and IODs. Are there also IOQs? I.e. indicator of qualification. If there are reliable indicators for various other aspects of the game, such as the above-described “passive ioi / asd” indicator then perhaps we can improve intuitive accuracy. There must be entire classes of indicators and common confusions that occur.

====================

Eventually she opened up when I was just being myself and having fun,
***being persistent and smiling was key.

Formula: Due to previously discussed “act like you’re weird but give passive IOIs” mechanism, smile (relaxed, no big deal, being myself, unreactive) while plowing (90% rule) and using positive misinterpretation. Actually just viewing everything through the most positive frame possible.

This still gives room for routines (such as an opening stack) and calibration (such as negs and kino plowing.)

Everything else still applies…use DHVs, use false disqualifiers, kino escalate, get investment and qualify her, etc.
=====

TRY sarging from the frame of mingling, or spidering, where you’re not necessarily trying to pickup but only trying to meet high-value people and add them to your social circle.

ALSO try doing this but ALSO doing pickup as well. Doing jealousy, etc.

=====

Violation theory / ethics

Often we can violate social norms in the field, for the sake of practice or experimentation, and this is part of the learning process. In fact this is important for learning more about how social interaction really works, and we must feel dispassionate. But in the long term, we still must be aware of social norms and how they affect our game - we have to “surf the wave” and think intelligently about how to exploit these mechanisms, and not hide behind an “I don’t give a fuck” attitude. This becomes ESPECIALLY RELEVANT when you begin to focus more on social circle game and less on cold approach game. You only live once!

When someone comes in your set, and is nice to you, without making social errors, then you are a violator if you are rude or cruel to him. If his frame is really weak, then he will still lose. But if he has a strong frame and is unreactive, then he will win, since YOU are the one who is in violation. You are the one who was being mean.

Conversely, if you go into someone else’s set, and you are nice, without making social errors, then the set is under a certain social obligation to show basic politeness. They can’t just ignore you. At this point you can just plow.

Why is this important? Because this ethical rule seems to be in operation socially, whether people see it or not. And because there is power to be derived: There is no longer any social obligation to be polite once someone has become a violator. If you enter a guy’s set politely, and the guy is rudely amoging you without provocation, he is a violator and you can now just ignore him like he’s not there. The more he reacts after that, the more his value drops while yours goes up. You couldn’t have previously ignored him if he hadn’t been rude - since that would have turned YOU into a violator.

There has been an important question related to AMOG tactics for a while now. The question is, if I am AMOGing the guy, aren’t I becoming more and more reactive to him, thus giving him power? AMOG lines are cool, but “less is more”…etc. Calibration is important:
— You can just AMOG him. You MUST calibrate that he will knuckle under your frame before you attempt this.
— If you miscalibrate and he retains a strong frame and positive attitude, then he wins. You are now in violation and he can ignore you.
— Instead of attacking him, you can BAIT him to try to AMOG you. (People have previously used these terms interchangeably, but I am now suggesting that there is a difference.) If he does, he is now a violator and you can ignore him. Most people will fall for this, this is why classical AMOG theory works. This is the mechanism being exploited. If he doesn’t take the bait, you are still in the game since you only baited and you never actually violated. But you lost a little “social energy”. The more obvious it becomes that you are baiting him, the more you are REACTING to him. The less he takes the bait, the more YOU are becoming REACTIVE to HIM.
A piece of violation theory (or “ethical theory”) thus becomes the ability to bait people into making social errors. People will often hang themselves without your help. Other people need some rope. If you can bait people into violating (or DLVing which I think is slightly different. A DLV is a social error but a social error is not a DLV.) If you can bait people into violating, then the rules now apply: I can ignore the person without become a violator myself. My value will continue to rise and his will continue to drop. This will also generate attraction in nearby females. Useful?
I think that girls are really good at this. Stupid girls just violate (they can get away with some degree of this but they lose power as a result). But girls with social skills will bait other people to violate. Or even worse: set a double-bind frame and so NO MATTER what you do, you just hung yourself.

This is interesting as well: if she sets a double-bind frame where I will lose, and I don’t come up with a good comeback (reframe), then I will also lose. The fact that I was silent subcommunicates that I couldn’t think of a good response, making me the loser in the battle of the wits. It is also implicitly interpreted by her that her frame must have been correct, that I AM a violator, and that I had nothing to say in my own defense. She can now ignore me AND continue dropping my value if I stick around (due to violation theory.)

POSITIVE MISINTERPRETATION
This shows why frame control is so important, why I must always have a good answer to a shit test. She is baiting me to disqualify myself. And not only must I have a good answer, but I must be totally friendly and nice and unreactive. Even if she is non-responsive, or acts like I’m weird, or challenges me, I mustn’t be rude, unfriendly, or angry/reactive, because that is exactly what she is baiting me to do. For the sole purpose of making me a VIOLATOR so that she can blow me out without becoming a violator herself. Notice that when your value is low, girls will get really impatient and try to pick fights so that they have moral justification to blow you out. Girls will also do this when they want to end a relationship. Again, this all stems from the “no responsibility” rule.

How to get to her WITHOUT VIOLATING.
— Be friendly and nice, without “crossing that line” of being mean to someone, while simultaneously plowing and interpreting everything in a positive way. Do NOT get reactive or you lose. Just act like nothing is a big deal, keep plowing and being yourself, and don’t violate social norms.
— Neg. Perhaps this is why Negs have been so hard to understand. I can define a neg as something that conveys disinterest, while simultaneously NOT crossing a violation line. If I say, “I hate you, you fucking bitch” then I have conveyed disinterest. But I have also disqualified myself by violating. Now I’m creepy and people can ignore me without feeling guilty. She’s looking to screen me out anyway, early on especially, so I basically just made it easy for her. (Some guys walk away from this sort of thing saying, “Whatever, I don’t care. I really don’t give a fuck.” It’s good to not give a fuck. But that attitude should be combined with the social intelligence not to make social errors and get yourself disqualified. We are playing to win, so don’t deliberately hang yourself. People WILL give you the rope - watch out for it. They are baiting you.)
Negs allow me to do very useful things (frame control, false disqualifiers, emotional stimulation, comfort building, value subcommunication) while simultaneously NOT crossing the violation boundary and getting disqualified. I’m still friendly and unreactive. I’m not a violator. And as long as I keep plowing, she can’t blow me out.

This may be what people are talking about when they say that people can’t blow them out of set anymore.

Ways that SHE will try to BAIT YOU to violate
— Her friend runs over and they scream and hug. Now they have created a new shared frame together. If I bust in, in a reactive way, I am now a violator. If I stand there like a dork, I feel stupid and start to panic. The social pressure is building on me…I can’t leave and I can’t stay. Eventually I slink away. Notice that Mystery’s solution FOLLOWS SOCIAL NORMS: First you cut your thread (appropriate) then you ask the target to introduce the obstacle (appropriate)
— Her friend is rude to you. You are rude to her friend. Now the target can treat you like a violator and it’s “not her fault.” Don’t take the bait.
— “Well thanks for coming over to say hi, it was really nice to meet you.”
— “Um, we haven’t seen each other in a long time; we’re having a really important conversation right now.”
— These are interesting because now if I stay, I am a violator EVEN IF I CONTINUE TO BE NICE. They have set the frame that merely being there makes me a violator. In my experience, the best solution here is a massive value demonstrator combined with a false disqualifier: “Oh we’re actually on our way over to Skybar, I just wanted to stop and say hi first…” (stack forward.) ANY OTHER SUGGESTIONS FOR THIS?
— Another suggestion for this, of course, is to come in with massive value and a false time constraint in the FIRST PLACE, so they don’t bait me in this way. For example, you get a lot less of this bullshit if you have first been building your value in the room, for example by parading a hot girl around. Ever notice that the other sets open easier once you have been parading a hot girl around?
Interesting: When Mystery handles an interrupt, he reminds the target that it’s “the polite thing to do” to introduce him to the obstacle. Now she has to do it, she would be a VIOLATOR if she didn’t. So she does. Interesting that she can PRETEND she didn’t think of it and absolve herself of responsibility. If she leaves you standing there and you eventually leave, it’s still “not her fault.” But once you make it explicit that she’s being rude, now she HAS to follow social norms, so she does. There are thus cases where you can use your knowledge of social norms to force people to comply with them where they might normally pretend they didn’t notice. This is why social norms are so interesting - because people DO follow them, whether they have full knowledge of them or not. But having that knowledge gives you an edge.
— Also interesting: If I explicitly voice a secret society rule or understanding, I HAVE committed a violation. BUT I can act as if I didn’t notice it and still get away with it. Other people nearby can ignore it and it will go away. But if someone says “but of course” he is pointing that that I am a violator, that I have made explicit something that people prefer to assume. This is because people like to act Secret Society, without being made RESPONSIBLE for it, by pretending they don’t know. When I point it out explicitly, they can no longer pretend, and thus they are forced to deny their own behavior and to pay lip service to social programming. I have become a PARTY POOPER - a VIOLATOR. I have already fucked up. But by saying “but of course” the person has now made my fuckup clear and my lack of social intelligence is now evident. DON’T TALK ABOUT THE SECRET SOCIETY. Remember one of the rules of the Secret Society is that you don’t talk about it. Talking about it implies that you aren’t familiar with the rule, and thus you must NOT BE A MEMBER.
— Thus the strategy should always be to ASSUME the secret society is true, and escalate accordingly, while simultaneously pretending that it’s not true and also paying lip service to the typical social programming.

— The phrase “it’d be rude not to.” This phrase absolves yourself of responsibility by implying that you would be a violator if you did anything else. Remember, people can’t blame you if there is a higher authority. This phrase uses social norms as a higher authority.
— Interesting that the phrase can ALSO be used in cases where it’s NOT LOGICALLY TRUE, but will still have the same effect regardless. The more obvious it becomes that the phrase is actually not appropriate, the more funny it becomes when you use the phrase. What is the tie-in here with humor?

Are there ways to get rid of someone WITHOUT using violation theory?
— can’t think of one

This could be really important.

Some general principles:
— Don’t ever violate a social norm since it causes you to lose power. (Unless you are doing some specific practice or experimentation.) Always keep the “high ground” morally. Always be unreactive, friendly - and plow.
— If someone BAITS you, continue to be unreactive, friendly, and plow.
— If someone VIOLATES you, you can now AMOG and IGNORE him without becoming a violator. Ignore is preferable since it is less reactive. A single good AMOG line can be useful as well depending on context.
— You can also BAIT someone into violating. If he takes the bait, he is now a violator and the above now applies.
— If he doesn’t take the bait, then calibrate: Can you bait him again? If you keep it up, he will gain an edge because you are reacting slightly more. The most you can do beyond this is just be unreactive, friendly, plow, and ignore him as much as possible without going into violation.
— If you can calibrate that the person has a weak frame, you can just violate him and retain the stronger frame. But beware: now all of his friends, some of whom may be socially more intelligent than him, can ignore you and get away with it.

Back to this paragraph:
Have you ever been gaming a girl, and she has a weird smile on her face, with her eyebrows up a bit, like she thinks you’re being weird? But at the same time, she continues to show passive IOIs. And also she doesn’t contribute that much, forcing you to carry most of the interaction. But she goes along with it. Players can miscalibrate this because of her weird look and her non-investment, they decide that she is being “a bitch” and they say “whatever fuck it then, I don’t care” when they actually could have kept plowing.

What’s really going on is that she uses her facial expression to set a frame that you are weird. This absolves her of responsibility of what is happening (so she can allow it to continue.) Unfortunately, this also baits the PLAYER to become a violator. “I’m not BEING weird, but she’s ACTING like I’m weird. What a BITCH!” If you aren’t socially intelligent, you will take the “bait” that she was “rude” to you, and thus you will be rude back to her. Once you do this:
— IN YOUR MIND: She was rude for no reason, therefore I was rude back. Whatever. Fuck her. I don’t care. Women are bitches.
— IN HER MIND: I didn’t do anything wrong. He was being weird to me and then he was being rude to me so I filtered him out. Just another loser.

A guy with a stronger frame will remain unreactive to her bait and friendly, and will never go into violation and won’t get screened out. He can’t get blown out. Now all he has to do is continue stimulating her emotions and DHVing. The best part is that the unreactive, friendly part is a DHV in-and-of-itself.

So she is selecting for strength. Is she trying to blow me out or trying to get with me? BOTH. One or the other will work, either outcome is fine with her. It’s not her fault either way. I COULD interpret that she is blowing me out, and I’d be RIGHT. I could get all reactive about this. Or I COULD interpret that it is ON and that she is testing for strength. And I would be RIGHT in this case as well. It is my own value and my own subcommunications that determine which way she will interpret it. NOT — HER — FAULT.

Other concepts:
Different violations, and different baits, have differing levels of plausible deniability.
Some violations only exist if they are pointed out (”Introduce me to your friend, it’s the polite thing to do.”)
Some baits are more or less reactive. If it isn’t obvious that I’m baiting (”thanks for stopping by!”) then I retain plausible deniability while simultaneously forcing the person to become a violator if they stay. I don’t come off as reactive. If it IS obvious that I’m baiting (”oh that’s a really nice coat you got there. You from the CIRCUS?”) then I’m also perceived as more reactive. If I continue baiting in this way I will become the more reactive one and eventually lose. This is why, when AMOGing, “less is more.” I gave myself less plausible deniability.
— Always maximize my own plausible deniability, and that of my target, while minimizing that of rival players and AMOGs.

“Can I have a light?” is a great opener (I got the idea from Christophe). It ties in here because it’s a socially reasonable request, and makes the person look like a jerk if they don’t give you compliance. This is why it’s better to use small hoops early on…because the smaller the hoop, the more of a violator the person appears to be if they defy.

Taking Care of Yourself

Your body is the most important possession you have, and yet it is something that far too many men take for granted and simply cant be bothered to take care of. Your body is both your vessel and your weapon. Its one of your biggest tools of seduction and it’s the only one you’re going to get, so don’t get lazy and waste it. It may not be perfect, you may not like many parts of it, but there are no exchanges and no returns on these things, so you better learn to work with what you have. The way a man takes care of himself can indicative of how he takes care of a woman. If you’re a complete slob who cant even find the time to wash your hair, what is your target going to think about how much time you will be able to find for her? A fit, well-groomed, and well-dressed man also attracts the stereotype of being successful, since successful people typically understand the importance of taking care of their appearance.

It may not make or break your game, but a man who obviously takes care of himself has a significant advantage over another who does not. Would you not find a woman with styled hair, a fit body, and a classy dress more attractive than a woman with messy hair, loose jeans, and a hoody? Of course you would! As men, we generally do not appreciate the amount of effort that women put into looking good. Why cant we do the same? Even if you don’t care so much about making women more attracted to you in this sense, why not take care of yourself and your body as a means of improving your health, energy, and self-confidence? When you take care of yourself you will start to respect yourself more, and when you respect yourself your self confidence will increase tremendously. When that happens (and it will) people will respect you more.

When you want to take care of yourself (and you should) there are a number of different elements you should be looking at, each one as important as the next:

Good physical fitness is key: get your self a nice tone body. Unless you are drastically overweight, there’s no need to be popping pills or hitting the gym every day. If you want to get buff and muscular (and that is a DHV) you may have to, but it doesn’t take too much of a drastic change to lose a little excess fat and tone up a bit. I’m no fitness expert (that would be Steve Jacks), but there’s a tremendous amount of information on fitness out there on the internet. Basically though, just make sure you eat right and make yourself a quick nightly and morning workout routine for when you wake up and go to bed, perhaps a few sit ups, push ups, and a couple of simple weight lifting exercises. A gym membership can still a good idea, but you don’t NEED to maintain a religious work-out schedule if your focus is just to stay healthy and look good. If you want more tips on getting a tone body I would highly recommend looking at matador’s article on body building he has recently posted.

Your choice of food is important as well. Everyone eats. It’s what our body runs off of; it’s where it gets its fuel from. You are what you eat and that’s a fact. Greasy foods may taste good, but they make you feel gross afterward because of all the unhealthy crap you are stuffing down your throat. Even if you’re eating out a lot, pretty much every place has a healthy menu that you can get something from. Although it is a little more pricey to eat healthier you can take pride in knowing that you’re doing your body some good. Just because you can’t win friends with salad does not mean that it doesn’t taste good, is good for you and will make you a healthier person all around. Your body will thank you for it too, as healthy eating habits typically result in more energy and a better feeling throughout the day. .

Then there’s grooming. Just because you’re healthy doesn’t mean you look good. Grooming should be next on your list. Your hair is most likely the most distinguishable feature that you have on your body so you’re grooming skills should be up to par; head and face. Do some research, ask a hair stylist. Find out what’s going to look best on you, play around a little bit with a few different styles if you want to and see what kinds of different reactions you can get. Find something that suites you nicely. You can go something very extreme with shapes such as an Astro boy look, a crazy anime character or even devil horns to use as something to peacock with. Or you can go to something nice, short and spiked up a little bit with some styling gel. Just keep your hair looking nice, don’t let it get messy, don’t let it get long with split ends and for the love of god don’t let it get thick and greasy. Same goes for your facial hair. If you have facial hair, keep it trimmed and neat, otherwise keep that face shaved and smooth. If you’re going for the stubbly look, that’s cool, but make sure you keep it under control.

This brings us to our next point: showering. Showering makes us clean, makes us smell nice and it makes us feel good about ourselves and can actually help relieve stress. Shower in the morning, shower after a work out, shower after work, and shower before going out to sarge. If you can, a nice bath before you go to bed can make you feel more relaxed and help you get a much better night of sleep.

When it comes to proper hygiene and grooming take some common sense into consideration. Brush your teeth regularly, clean and trim your fingernails, trim any unnecessary body hair that’s not too needed. Wash your face. Avoid looking greasy, dirty, or pimply at all costs. Use skin-care products if you want smooth, touchable skin (women notice these things on guys!). Make sure everything is clean and in tip top shape, this means everything from head to toe. Do your feet stink? Get insoles, foot scrubs, or powders. Do you have acne? Get treatment. Do you look sickly and pale? Get a tan. Whatever may be wrong with your body these days, there is almost always a solution. Get that shit handled ASAP!

A well maintained and well taken care of body can take you very far. It can make you feel good about yourself and only further improve your game (both inner and outer). Most changes involve very little effort to improve yourself very dramatically. Small-chunk these things if you have to: get one thing handled and then work on the next. Make little changes and stick to taking care of yourself and in time you’re guaranteed to notice some major differences.

Remember to always keep that smile well equipped,

- Wild Card

P.S. I found a cute little video on washing yourself, and figured that since it was strangely relevant to this article, I’d post it here.

About Wild Card

Wild Card is a seduction writer operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work for Venusian Arts, Wild Card is a card dealer and drummer in a classic rock/new rock band. In his spare time, he takes every opportunity he can to have crazy adventures with his wingmen, Showcase and Prophet.

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 3

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 3 of 4
Exploring the body

Body massages are a great way for you and your partner to get in the mood for sex.  It is the classic method people use to excite their partner that can excite us too.  This article will focus on non-genital forms of body massage.  Don’t worry; we’ll get to the genital massage and penetrative sexual techniques soon.  First we have to crawl before we can walk. For our purposes, let’s not discuss the obvious areas like the back or the foot.  Instead, let’s focus on the areas of the body with less notoriety, the hands and the head.

Remember the first time you were lucky enough to explore a woman’s body?  Treat every opportunity like it was your first.  Explore with enthusiasm and appreciation.  There are a couple of reasons it is a good idea to explore the female body through massage.  First, the more you explore the body through touch, the more you will awaken her erogenous zones.  Erogenous and secondary erogenous zones are areas of the body that are highly sensitive and filled with nerve endings that heighten pleasure.  Areas like the neck, back, hips, thighs, and feet can all be erotic areas to touch a woman.  So caress, rub, and stimulate these pleasure zones.  Awaken the nerve endings in her body.  Each woman will have different areas that she finds sensitive and erotic.  Ask her what feels good, listen for feedback and observe the non-verbal cues she is displaying during touch.  She will give you a lot of clues as to how she likes to be touched during foreplay, so study her reactions and sensitivity areas.

For our purposes, we are going to talk about massaging specific body areas.  When was the last time you massaged a woman’s hands?  The human hand (specifically the fingertips and palm) has one of the highest concentrations of Meissner corpuscle nerve endings in the body.  Most women enjoy hand massages that are slow, passionate, and sensual.  Grab some lotion or oil and give her the greatest hand massage she has ever had.  Remember, each one of these techniques should be used with oil or lotion for best results.

-Clench all your fingers/entire hand around each of her fingers and pull away firmly massaging each finger.
-Try using your thumbs to massage her palm areas.
-While palm-to-palm, interlock your fingers with her fingers and gently squeeze, then pull your interlocked fingers away from hers and stretch her fingers.
-You can use your palms, knuckles, thumbs, or pointed fingers to massage different areas.
-With your thumb, rub the area of her palm where her thumb turns into her palm.

Be careful when massaging the backhand side of the hand opposite of the palm.  There is less flesh, more bones, and massaging it too firmly can be uncomfortable.  Don’t just stop at the wrists, the arm massage also feels quite good too.

Women also enjoy head/scalp massages.  There are actually women who report reaching orgasm just by combing their hair.  Many women will rate a good head rub or a man running his fingers through her hair as highly pleasurable (and unique).  Women have also reported that it’s a turn on for a man to wash their hair when the take a shower together.  A good head rub takes some practice and getting use to.  The amount of pressure and intensity should be less firm and gentle.  A good rule is to pretend your washing her hair.  Don’t wash her hair like you wash your own, there is no scrubbing involved.  Instead, use rhythmic motions combined with sensual touch to stimulate her head.  Here are some techniques to use.

-You can use your fingers as a comb and brush her hair and scalp.
-Take your entire hand and gently start from her neck and work your way up her head.  You want to end up with the back of her head in your hand and your palm against her scalp.  Then, with your fingers gently interlaced in her hair, massage her scalp.
-You can also use your fingertips to massage her scalp in circular patterns to relieve tension.
-Take both hands and sensuously massage her head.

Adjust the intensity according to what she asks for, that means ask for feedback.  Be careful of pulling her hair or getting so excited it becomes rough.

Some things to remember with massages: use oils and lotions that are hypoallergenic in case your partner has skin allergies and keep in mind oils can clog pores. Communicate with your partner and ask for feedback regarding the firmness, pressure, and speed.  A massage is a gift to your partner to show them you appreciate and respect them, so be careful for the temptation to cop a feel or venture into areas of the body that might spell aggressive rather than seductive.

Dr. Chaves

Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Classic FR- Friday Night with Mystery, Fall 1998

Ok, I went to an area of town known for bars and cafes and restaurants - I went by myself and had never gone there before. I got into some cool adventure but after several no-gos I ended up at a regular club right downtown. I got NOTHING. I went from club to club and while I had fun (I must have talked with 10 girls in the whole night) NOTHING panned out into COOL GROOVES.

So I ended up walking into a place and bumped into a girl from a year ago who was so happy to see me. I remember her and I not cutting the bacon ’cause while she is VERY PRETTY (I met her at a fashion show where she was modeling originally) she wasn’t very SEXUAL. Thing is, she her male friend and I (the male friend was JUST a friend) went to another club together. She was hanging off my arm and she kept touching my chest and stomach and was so flirty and she bit my cheek and nuzzled me and everything. I played VERY hard to get and she told me she had lost her book with my # in it and wanted my # again. I RELUCTANTLY gave it to her and she says she’ll call this week. Thing is, while pretty, I don’t know if she’ll copulate with me. That’s all I really want to do with her - if she would fuck me, Id hang with her - but if not, I wouldn’t want to just be friends and always have to ABSTAIN from my desires. That would get to me. I’ll tell ya what happens. I went to another club and nothing there and then for pizza and met a girl outside who I chatted with a bit and then a girl inside the pizza place. Point is, I didn’t get anywhere with them but I approached, met and chatted and left looking very cool. I was wearing a suit and the girls were CLUB girls so I looked a bit out of their range.

I would like to find my TYPE of woman. Where would I go? My TYPE is an intelligent model. A REAL model, not a wannabe. I’m a performing artist and want a model. It’s that simple. I don’t know where they ARE though. All the gorgeous girls today were soooo young. I like young, but they were sooo youth culture. I want class. Where are they? I looked and looked. Oh shit, remember the voluptuous girl I snacked on about 2 weeks ago? She was in one of the cafes I checked out. We talked for a brief time and then I took off playing “I don’t care, I’ve got better people to do”. I wonder if she’ll call me or email me or something. Who knows? She was a cutie but if she aint interested I can only move on, right?

Sorry for not being more into NG lately. I’ve had some stress from shows I had to perform the last week.

Oh, my HB friend (she is a 10!) on my birthday told me she loved me. I mean LOVE. She was crying and everything and we had a fight because her 3 friends (all 6.5 and UNDER) liked me and I was being flirty with them because it felt good and she got all pissed over that. It’s not like Id actually DO any of em, fuck! I mean ugs. Thing is we all went to her friends place and 2 of the girls took their tops off and got on the bed with me (I was just lying there watching) and the girls started to French kiss each other on my asking them to (I LOVE lesbianism). Then the 3rd girl came in and I told all three to kiss and they did. Then one of them started rubbing my cock through my pants (they were not beauties but 3 girls frenching each other 6 inches from my face will get me going I learned) and I asked her to stop and told them it was all good and that I just wanted to watch. Thing is, my HB friend was weirded out and called a taxi. She wrecked the whole scene. I left with her and we argued in the car. She was so in love with me (and to think I thought she and I had an UNDERSTANDING) and when I told her I want going to get INVOLVED with the ugs and just wanted to enjoy watching the lesbianism part (she likes lesbianism too it turns out) she said, “Why didn’t you tell me that?” I said, “Fuck, how am I supposed to know you needed me to TALK to you.” thing is we fought and haven’t spoken since. I’ve been busy anyway. See, I don’t fight. I never ever raise my voice. But she did to ME. That’s not acceptable behavior so I left.

Well anyway, it’s now 4:40am. I had a rather lonely evening. I met many girls but nothing really worth mentioning. Not great looking, or my type, or old enough, or mature enough, or into me enough.  It was a fun game though tonight. at least I tried.

Kino Compliance: The 3 Rs

I was observing a natural work a set the other day when I came upon an epiphany in terms of how kino works in its progression. I realized the term “escalation” did not properly encompass the whole process of what happens when kino occurs during a pickup scenario. I sat down and mapped it out and came up with what I think is a better way of describing how kino helps in building attraction. I was able to break it down in three overlapping steps similar to how attraction, comfort and seduction overlap thus does kino compliance. These three steps I have dubbed the “3 Rs” which are Receptiveness, Response, and Reciprocation, respectively.

In the beginning stages of kino escalating, gauging the indicators of interest (IOIs) is crucial in continuing kino and further ramping it up. In the first few minutes, kino should either step up gradually with slow attraction building (or rapidly if kino plowing targets with high body temp already) or should cycle up and down according to IOIs and IODs. The receptiveness of the kino will be indicated by direct body language and facial expressions. When a target smiles during kino this will be an indication of continued receptiveness. However, confused looks or expressions of distaste to any kind of touching should be calibrated with kino IODs. The receptiveness should be focused upon until major positive physical response mechanisms are present.

Once receptiveness is indicated the target or set should begin to respond favorably. In addition to body language, the kino should cause the target to begin to touch her hair, scratch herself, lean into you or other IOI responses that indicate that kino is being received favorably. This is where overlap occurs in that these responses are a physical phenomenon one can observe, but yet will overlap the receptive behavior. When referring to responses I generally am noting larger physical motions that are easily observed and congruent with the receptive indicators already mentioned. Responses can be negative, however. If receptiveness is plowed through and comfort is not established kino can still be met with a response such as turning away or backing up from unwanted kino. Therefore any ambiguous or negative response should be met with caution that includes building more attraction and cycling through less aggressive with more aggressive kino till positive responses occur.

After major positive responses, the last stage in the kino compliance cycle should occur. This involves reciprocation. Not only should a target respond with IOIs from your kino but they should begin to kino back too. Once this occurs it is a green light towards more intense kino that loops back through the 3 Rs. If, for example, you touch a woman’s hips and she touches yours this indicates you should now test for receptiveness towards more aggressive kino when the proper time calls for it (kiss closing in a seduction location is a great example of this cycling process). Once reciprocation occurs, the last level of kino should be a baseline for continuing to cycle kino and escalate again. The 3Rs should once again be favorable before advancing kino even further.

I feel this is a much more representative description of kino escalation then the term itself provides. Kino compliance with 3R cycling should yield positive results when practiced properly.

Have fun and keep Sarging.

Simeon

About Simeon

Simeon is a VA Coachoperating out of California. After winning the title of Master Pick-Up Artist on Season 2 of VH1?s The Pick-Up Artist, Simeon has chosen to further his training with Mystery and Matador as he continues the everlasting journey of improvements in the pickup arts. Now he has chosen to give value to others by teaching the arts that have so dramatically transformed his life so that others may share in the enjoyment that pickup creates through the rigorous but rewarding journey of pickup artist training provides.

Bodybuilding

Bodybuilding

When I was around 21, I got into bodybuilding. I played football, basketball, martial arts, track, & pole-vaulting in high-school. I grew up in Texas and being big and muscular increased your social value immensely (as most high schools I assume).

When I turned 21, I started to lift for aesthetic purposes, not just for athletic performance. At my peak I managed to get to 245 and 3.8% body fat benching 450lbs for 4-5 reps.

In short, I looked like a real amateur bodybuilder. Anybody who knows me from a couple of years ago can attest to that.

Here is my experience of various dynamics during my journey.

ATTENTION FROM WOMEN

This result was two-fold. I am around 6’2”. When I hit around 205 at 5% body fat, I noticed a night and day difference with women throwing IOIs at me. When I started to increase to 220lbs at 6% I noticed it started to go down. When I hit 245lbs @ 6-7% body fat I noticed it go down a lot. Some girls would still throw IOIs, but most were scared of me. In addition, some simply gave me deliberate IODs.

To put 205@5% into perspective: It would look like Brad Pitt in Fight Club or Troy.

At 220lbs@6%, it would look The Rock in Scorpion King.

At 245lbs@6-7% body fat, it would look freakish and like the guys on the cover of Muscle and Fitness and maybe FLEX (the guys on the cover of FLEX are pros and still are at another level above).

This was back before I knew anything about the community. In my mind:

More Muscle = More Social Value = More Women.

My conclusion: The Brad Pitt Fight Club look works the best for pua goals.

RESPECT FROM MEN

QUICK NOTE: Bodybuilding and fighting are two different art forms. Weight training-not bodybuilding-helps the latter. Do not think that just because you are big you can fuck with anyone. There are some scary cats out there. Avoid fights if possible is my best advice. It is not conducive to our survival goals.

Pros and Cons here: On one hand, you almost get instant respect from men. Men simply do not want to fuck with you. From bouncers, businessmen, athletes, musicians…etc. They all start throwing submission IOIs to let you know you’ve got them in this area. Some want to align with you, some want to distance themselves from you, and some outright resent you and talk shit behind your back.

Another pattern I observed. Rich guys will want to be seen with you (when you’re really big). They will want you to roll in their entourage. They will buy you drinks, throw women on you, and introduce you as their friend.

Cool guys, who you want to be like, will give you a level of respect instantly into their social circle, provided you are not a socially unintelligent person. In other words, they will give you access to their world, provided you don’t do anything stupid.

People in general will give you compliance easier. It’s the small things you notice in everyday situations from waiters, people standing in line…etc.

One funny story, I ran a red light at about 60mph, simply because I thought I could make in the yellow on pacific coast highway. I was in a national park and I noticed the park ranger slow down as I sped up. I was going to try to make the light and he was going wait for the next one. I ran it and he turned his sirens on and pulled me over. Why would I do such a thing you may ask? Well, I didn’t think these guys handled traffic violations. I thought they monitored park activity such as fires, vandalism…etc., things like that. In short, it was stupid, but that’s what my rationalization was at the time. As he is pulling me over, he asks me if I have been drinking which I said no and then asked me to step out of the car. After I did, he took one look at me and asked me, “Why shouldn’t I give you a ticket.” I told him, “that was a completely stupid thing I did and it won’t happen again.” He let me go! Some may say that was completely random. However, I disagree. Nothing is completely random, nothing is an accident. Even if people themselves are not aware of what they are doing, they’re emotions are reacting nevertheless. In this instance, his emotions & logic decided to give me a pass, if I simply gave him this one little compliance test. He didn’t want a cute logical answer, but wanted an emotional one. Notice how I never answered the question that he asked? Why would he do this in the first place? I believe, by the intimidation factor of this huge guy being presented to him on a one-on-one basis on the side of the road.

Women will want to show you off. Hold your arm like they are so proud to be there. Even though it all breaks down to value, there is nothing like seeing the love and adulation in a young girl’s face as she is looking at you and you know it is real.

CONFIDENCE

At gladiator dimensions, you’re CONFIDENCE is SUPER-HUMAN. I am not saying it is entirely real…just describing how you FEEL. You feel entitled to any girl in the venue. You FEEL entitled to TAKE what you WANT. You feel like you can slam dunk a basketball (which I could barely do)…you FEEL like you can accomplish anything after enduring the discipline and pain it takes to get there. YOU FEEL FUCKING AWESOME. Almost anything you wear looks good, you feel like a Ferrari on a road filled with Cadillacs. You feel peaceful. You feel clean. You feel energetic. You feel younger. You feel like you’re not aging. You feel DANGEROUS. Your feel POWERFUL…physically & mentally. Remember, don’t go into the gym get up to 225lb on bench with a gut and say you don’t feel these things. This is how I felt when my body was at a level where someone would pay me to photograph it.

HOW TO GET GOOD

A rough but effective game plan to get your body to where you want it to be is a follows:

First, outsource the knowledge. A lot of you guys are busy on your wealth and relationship nodes of your life. You don’t need to immerse yourself in the world of bodybuilding. Here is the solution and eventually you will acquire the knowledge yourself.

Find a trainer that LOOKS like a bodybuilder from a reputable GYM. You may not want to look like him, but he will have the knowledge and drive to take you to where you want to go because he has done it himself. They may be exceptions to the rule; however, I don’t want to waste any time finding out. Also, you have to believe in your trainer as a teacher/role model and he needs to earn that respect as he is yelling at you to grunt out another rep on the leg press as you have a white-hot burn going through your legs.

Second, you must hit your training, diet, supplementation, and rest in unison. If anyone of those areas is left undone, you will not get the “Perfect Look”. There are some major mistakes I see a lot of guys do. The will either:

1) Over train
2) Not know how to train, but think they do after reading a few pages of muscle and fitness.
3) Train and then go eat a pizza afterwards and wonder why their ab wall doesn’t show after the million crunches leg raises that they’ve done.
4) Not rest enough…I knew one guy do did fifteen sets of 8 on bench press as his first chest exercise! WTF!
5) I saw this same guy repping with the same weight for about 2 years!

The list could go on an on. In short, seek out those you have the knowledge and motivation that you need TODAY and who have proven successful at the task you are about to perform.

Here is a rough summary:

1) Seek out a QUALIFIED TRAINER based on my text above (this is an important step).
2) Follow his instructions exactly…believe in him even if you don’t see results at first. (That’s why step #1 is important, he needs to inspire, motivate, and earn your respect).
3) Believe that this body (the archetype I found the best for our PUA goals) is something worthy and worth fighting for. You have to want it. I illustrated my experience, so you’d know it is a huge DHV prop to your avatar.

CONCLUSION

For RELATIONSHIP purposes…I think it is an excellent sport that does provide the ROI you are looking for.

For HEALTH purposes…I think it is an excellent sport that does provide the ROI you are looking for.

For WEALTH purposes…I think it is an excellent sport that does provide the ROI you are looking for.

In this regard, remember I mentioned that High-Value guys will want to align with you. I can’t tell you how many different wealth-building alignments are spawned from guys wanting to be your friend and throwing value your way.

All-in-all the BODYBUILDING activity permeates through multiple areas of your life that are consistent with PUA goals. I high recommend it for the reasons in this post.

-Matador

Women Are Like Cats Part 1

Women Are Like Cats Part 1

Opening How do you approach a woman?

When you first meet a new cat, it’s usually startled when you first approach. It may not necessarily take flight but it will take precautions until it feel’s your not a predator with any type of agenda. Until the cat gets more familiar with whom you are and the scent you carry; you must believe that you are approaching with no intentions to “picking up the cat.” Notice that usually when you try to move around with the cat after first meeting it, it tends to want to disperse away. Well the same result would occur with a woman due to the high level of compliance you’re asking while she has little data and not enough comfort with you. Just like how you can tell the current emotional state/mood of a cat by the angle of its ears, you can tell about a woman by her current emotional state and conversation she gives you which are feedback you can acknowledge to know what input you’re receiving, therefore making it easy to communicate with her because you understand where she is in that moment.

Is it an indication of disinterest, demonstration of lower value, compliance test, indication of interest, or a demonstration of higher value? None the less the more time you spend in field then the more calibrated and awareness you will have of your environment, particularly social settings. In other words you will always know of what’s REALLY going on while others think they do. (People with really advanced game know what I mean. So remember when a movement is implemented it should be calibrated, smooth, confident, playful, and accurate. At the same time have that belief of being internally strong with no regrets or reasons why you as a man can’t step up if something caught your curiosity. However, don’t put yourself in a situation where you become that guy, “I must pet this cat.” Then you will notice your possibilities slimming down especially when you feel she’s got potential From there if you continue to game in the wrong direction you got yourself a restraining order. So how would you approach a cat? That’s how you approach a woman.

-Rizen

About Rizen

Rizen is a VA Coach living in Los Angeles. Aside from that he is a current college student in the process of majoring in public relations, a recording hip hop artist who’s secretive about his works for confidentiality agreements, a global traveler who not only has a diverse background or speaks fluent English and Arabic knowing Arabic in seven different dialects. In addition, travels frequently through out the year around the world enhancing both himself and his crafts to better reach his preference of taste, in what he considers an amplified set of skill sets.

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 2

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 2 of 4
Make love to her mind

Now that you understand the importance of foreplay, we need to start figuring out how to it works and what we should do.  There are countless techniques you can incorporate into foreplay.  Many of them will be tried and tested, hopefully becoming important parts of your sexual script.  Foreplay techniques should be creative, inventive, and of course, fun.  In the next 3 articles, we’ll focus on 3 important areas which every guy should have in their foreplay tool chest; mind foreplay, body massages, and kissing.

Mind foreplay is stimulating her largest sex organ – the brain.  The mind is a very powerful thing.  Did you know that some women can actually think off?  They can use their minds without any physical stimulation and reach orgasm through erotic thoughts.  However, for many women, mental blocks are one of the biggest obstacles to experiencing pleasure during sex.  There are two ways we can help challenge these blocks: relaxing the mind and then stimulating it.

Relaxing the mind often appears non-sexual, but it helps open the doors to the erotic.  By this I mean say and do things that will reduce her anxiety and the thoughts or questions she may have.  Women tend to multi task more than men, which leads to more thoughts running through their heads.  Many women will describe having a hard time focusing on sex and their own pleasure because they are worried about everyday life issues as well as sexual issues like how their body looks naked, if they feel sexy, and whether or not they should be jumping in the sack with this guy.  It’s your job to help calm these thoughts and the many other thoughts that can impact sexual satisfaction and comfort.

Make her feel at ease and cared for. Talk to her about what is stressing her out, problems she may be having, or simply what’s on her mind.  You’ll be surprised to find that after she vents and expresses to you, a few things are likely to happen.  First, she’ll probably feel better, more calm, less tense, maybe even relieved.  Second, she will trust you more.  Each time we show compassion, attentive listening, and concern, our partners will inch a little bit closer to us emotionally.  Third, with the non-sexual thoughts calmed, she will have more capacity to focus on things like erotic stimulation and the sexual moment at hand.  It may seem strange but planning the date, cleaning the house, or helping her with her homework all reduce her anxiety and help her to focus on feeling relaxed.  Here’s a creative and unique example.  A friend of mine in the Adult film industry loves to have sex (I mean loves it!), but she has concerns and fears that men she meets outside of the industry might have sexually transmitted diseases (STD).  Those within the industry get tested monthly and are quite open about sharing their results.  She is concerned about the risk of catching something, not being able to work, and personal health reasons. That sexual comfort issue impacts her desire to sleep with men outside of the industry and creates anxiety. A few weeks ago, one lucky non-industry guy was prepared enough to have his recent STD results handy to show her.  She saw proof of his clean bill of health and she “gave him the ride of his life!”  He pinpointed the anxiety, calmed her fears, reduced the anxiety, and it opened the door to sexual comfort.

Now that we have helped relax her mind, the next step is to stimulate it. Guys, masturbate her mind.  Victor Hugo once wrote that a compliment is like a kiss through a veil. Compliment her in ways that make her feel sexy and comfortable.  For example, don’t just say her hair “looks nice.”  Describe her hair with vivid descriptions and enthusiasm.  “You’re hair looks stunning tonight! I think that is one of my favorite hairstyles I have seen on you.”  Learn to use descriptive words and adjectives to enhance your phrases.  She’ll feel sexier and appreciate you more.  Open a thesaurus and look up the word beautiful and find 10 different words you can use to compliment her.  Another mind stimulator is turning her on with erotic talk, email, or text messages.  You have to make sure she is comfortable with that before you open the floodgates to erotic talk.  If used wisely, erotic talk can make women crave sexual touch and the erotic fulfillment of desire and fantasies.  Sometimes a subtle comment can do the trick, so be careful not to scare her away with excessively dirty talk or overdoing it, at least initially.  Non-verbal behaviors can help create sexual mood as well.  Holding her hand, warming her shoulders/hands with your hands if it’s cold, allowing her to enter a door first and placing your hand on her back as a means of escorting her through the door, an eye wink, a powerful sexy gaze, and even the tease of unavailability all can be used as foreplay techniques to increase sexual tension.  Use romance as an erotic tool and ally rather than the enemy that speaks a foreign tongue.  Plant the seeds of sexual desire in her brain and watch it grow.  Remember a little goes a long way.

Dr. Chaves

Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Classic FR: Fall 1998

Alright gentlemen, at 9 p.m., I readied and went to meet my friend Tal and his buddy Action Fighter downtown. We ate at a cool food joint and discussed the chance of my meeting the famous Angelina Jolie from Hackers. We discussed and planned. It was my party invite and I invited my friends so I had dibs on Angelina. We agreed on that. They said that since I was the guy who worked his ass off to get good, it was only fitting that I landed her in order to complete my training as Action Lover. Se we get to the place for 11:20pm. Action Fighter couldn’t get in ’cause the ticket was for only 2 so I asked the guy if I could go up and find the film-makers to get my friend in and they let me in (I think it was my confident and PLEASANT demeanor.) We go in and I meet a couple of people I knew. We walked around and the place slowly picked up over time. A photographer I knew through a biz acquaintance was there and he took some pics of me. Me, Action fighter and Tal just waited around and nothing happened for the first hour. We just looked busy and chatted and hung which was tough to do. We saw Rosanna Arquette there but I didn’t intro myself to her. We were waiting for Jolie to come. I thought, when she comes, I have to be all set up to meet her. I figured, first, she must be intro’d to me, and second, I must have women around me to appear as positive testimonial to my coolness. So I intro’d myself to 2 women who were not my type at all just to get something going around me. This is known as BASING. This is where you start a BASE of women around yourself to DRESS yourself in female-atude. One of them liked Tal too so he enjoyed the yak. Better than hanging alone waiting for the cream of the crop to still arrive. Well, Jolie wasn’t coming so I dumped the 2 girl BASE and walked around. Jolie NEVER arrived which sucks because I asked the photographer to get Jolie to come and meet me. That would have been cool because she would have felt like ‘I’ was important enough for her to want to meet ME. He would say to her that he wanted to take a picture of the two of us and I would be surrounded by several people and the HYPE would be around ME. If only she were THERE. Mind you, I’m not pissed or anything. It was a long shot worth trying for. She could have had a boyfriend or been married but at least I went there.

Ok, so I end up meeting a couple cool black dudes and we shoot the shit for a bit. They were sort of a second BASE. Tal, Action Fighter (AF) and I go get a drink at the complementary bar. We only ordered coke because drinking lames out the brain for the sharpness required for the game. None of us drink. The ‘drink to loosen up’ excuse is invalid from a scientific standpoint. Playing the game is INCLUDES over-riding your emotions. See, beautiful women by their presence will create a STATE-CHANGE in you. They don’t have to talk; they just have to BE THERE. You will get nervous and horny and weird. This feeling will make you behave like EVERY other guy. This state-change is an indicator that the woman is WORTHY of your attentions. However, you can’t let this STRONG EMOTION alter your approach. This is an internal issue that happens on TOP of the external issue of attracting her. It’s a BITCH of an emotion too though because it makes you WANT her so bad that you will be NICE to her. What the NICE GUYS don’t realize is that only men who are around women a lot don’t have this state-change and therefore do not behave like horny-toads. So you must act like you don’t FEEL this inside and suppress the feeling. Good news is, when you ARE around women a lot, the feeling gets weaker. You can control this STATE-CHANGE as you can nervousness before public speaking and such. You just ignore the feeling. Only YOU know you have this internal issue. Hiding it is the big thing. When you are drunk, it removes this feeling, but it ALSO removes your sharpness and focus.

Ok, so Tal, AF and I go for another walk about in the place. We chat with our 2 girl BASE and Tal gets attention from one of them. They are not WORTHY but they DO invite us to their home party tomorrow. I could tell that this invite thing was designed for Tal. The girl must really like her. She isn’t WORTHY for him though. But hey, we plan on going. See, they actually had already written the directions for us when we returned to them. Weird but cool. The other one said, “There will be lots of single women there for Tal.” I replied, “I’ll try to convince Tal that that is important to him.” I was playing coy for him. They leave the party and we move on. There are 2 very attractive ladies near the speaker. I approach them and initiate my attack. Right behind them is a producer who was listening in and he gives me his card. In minutes I have the girls and this producer dude follow me to where my BASE 2 of the 2 black dudes are. We all chit chat and laugh and have fun for about 10 minutes and then I ask the blond girl (call her Tat here in NG) to come with me to a quieter area. I do this because it is a wonderful controlling and leadership display. I also got her away from the rest so only she and I could talk. But I looked cool to her because the producer thought I was cool and showed it, shaking my hand several times and the 2 black dudes were cool to me too. Anyway, we go to a quieter place but she asks if her friends could come. I say sure. So Me, Tat and 2 other cute girls go and sit somewhere else in the place. Oh by then, AF already left to go to his girlfriend at home. He’s not into the game, just appreciates what I do and watches me work. Ok, so I talk to Tat (who is at least a 9 if not more (24 yr old beauty - a therapist) and the other 2 sort of dissipate for a while because they know Tat likes me. We talk for an hour. Our talk includes connecting, how the mind is incredible, we talk about cosmology (an interest of mine) in an emotional way, and other stuff. She wore a black dress which was cut above the knee and her body was fucking awesome man! Fuck! I treated her like a friend. I did the pull my finger script on her and it really put me in control. Tal wanted to leave so I asked her for a ride home and she agreed so he took off. We will go to that party tomorrow. Ok, so I told Tat that I had a few rules in case she ever called me (I didn’t give her my #, I just told her my rules.) I actually TOLD her these. Swear.

1. If you call my pager, don’t leave a pager #.
2. If you call my pager, rather than saying via voice mail, “Hey, call me”, instead type in your # or I won’t call you.
3. If I call you and you can’t talk, don’t say, “Can you call me back?” I won’t. Instead, say, “I’ll call you back.” And then actually CALL me back.
4. If I call you, when you find out I’m ME, instead of saying, “Hey, what’s up?” I would prefer you saying, “Oh HI sweetie, how nice of you to call!” I told her I would do the same in return.
“Is all this fair?” She agreed.

I had the chance to make her friend like me too. I got Tats friends respect when she noticed I didn’t let Tat shit on me. I gave Tat rules and basically behaved like a man. I was confident and in control and lead the conversation. I listened and asked questions too which gave me valuable info with regards to her VALUES. Great insights I learned this week here in NG. Man, has NG helped me. Thanks guys BTW.

I also told her that I would NOT ask for her #. Why? I said, “Because I’m not like every other guy. You will have to WORK to get it off me. AND, if you say, can I have your #, I won’t find that creative enough so I will actually say NO. You will need to be creative, fair?” She says, “Ok I’ll need to think about this.”

Ok so we went to her car and I made jokes about her CLUB. You know, The CLUB, that bar on the steering wheel. Ok, so she drove me all the way home and that really allowed us to get to feel friendshipy comfortable. Her friend was in the back asking me questions. Like, she was qualifying me for her friend. I believe I passed all the tests nicely. Halfway home I mention, “You realize if you don’t ask for my # I will say, “Pleasure meeting you” and just get out of the car.” She says, “I was thinking about how I am going to ask.” When we got in front of my place she didn’t say anything but I could tell she really was going to so as a joke I said, really quickly, “pleasure meeting you” and opened the door and got out.

“Wait”, she said. I sat back down, door open. “Yes? What?”
She said, “can I have your number?” I said, “No! Boring. Try again.”
“Oh come on, don’t be difficult. Just gimmee your #.” I looked back at her friend and said, “If some guy said, “oh come on, don’t be difficult. Just gimmee your #.” Would you? She said no. “This won’t do. Try again. Be creative and sincere.” I was toying with her and actually making her nervous about losing me. “I would very much like to have your #”, she said.
I said, “Why?”
“Because I want it. Just give it to me.”
“NO”, I said, “why do you want my number?”
“How else will we see each other again?”
“Because I want to.”
I reply, “Why can’t you look at our time together as a fun time, a cool memory, and leave it at that? It’s like a nice package, we had a good time and that’s that.” She said, “Well, wouldn’t you want to OPEN the package?”
FUCK IM good. I WANTED her to say that. I MADE her say that with this game. I ‘permitted’ her to have my number but only AFTER I did the CREATIVE CLOSE script. It was awesome, I ran her through hell to get my #. She had to EARN IT! The girl in the back thought I was very cool and agreed with me and said to her, “you have to earn his #. He’s a man of value. He’s worth more than just a, “I’ll call you.”

We planned to see each other on Sunday (Saturday I have that party). After I got her # but before I gave mine I said, “before you get to have my number, you will agree to call me tomorrow, just to touch base. Is that fair?”
“Yes that is fair. :)” “Not too early though, I’m planning on sleeping in.”
They waved several times as they drove off.

I made her WANT me. I made myself WORTH it. In a way, I acted like a girl. I was coy and hard to get. Fuck girls are good at this. How the hell do they do it so well so early? Anyway, thanks to the SS newsletters and your posts, I have really gotten my shit together. I came upstairs and IMMEDIATELY began posting shit here. Its 6:05 a.m. now and there you have it. Oh, BTW: remember that 10s # I got last Wednesday? Well, I had called her 2 days later and she said, “I’m busy can you call me back?” That sucked. So before the FILM PREMIERE I called her again and she was getting her hair done. She was busy tonight (I had invited her to the FILM thing). She didn’t try to get together another time nor did she sound so interested. So you know what I did? Now this hurt. I deleted her # from my list. I figure: I did all I can do to attract her LIVE that night I met her and I remember doing very well. She loved me. But on the phone she wasn’t all that into me. So I gave her 2 tries and she just didn’t bite like as if she was interested. I won’t call again. If she doesn’t call, that simply means she doesn’t want to be with me. Simple and direct, yes? I can’t convince her any MORE by calling her. I did all I can do and it is now up to her. I will only lower my standards by calling again. So I deleted the #. If she calls, BONUS. If not, I did the best I can … oh, AND I got a # today from a beautiful girl that I would love to be a girlfriend. Wow … ok, now get THIS! Remember that photographer at the party? His camera was digital and he took a picture of Tat and me. I asked him to email it to me and he agreed. So, that means you guys get a pic. But only if you ask me privately and are cool about it. Don’t burst my bubble!

JIMMY the HuN BTW did NOT show up. He did NOT email me. He did NOT do anything. Of course I won’t call this a cop out on his part because I DID give him short notice. Besides, at $100 a #, I’d only have made $100. Thing is, it’s the only # I wanted! She is amazing and I am in LOVE! Wow. JIMMY, come out another time. Hey dude, honest, come out to the house party tomorrow. Or is that today? Saturday night anyway. Email me and we can meet up if you are up to a friendly game of The Game. Don’t let me down. I’m ready to uphold my reputation and nothing you can say but “OK, I’ll be there” will uphold yours.

Mystery

Jealousy: Learning to Control It

Jealousy, what is it exactly?

A lot of people make it seem like such a negative feeling. From this impression, most of the time people feel that they have to resort to violence or anger. But this does not necessarily have to be the case.

“Jealousy leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side” - Yoda.

Jealousy is something triggered off in our minds to send us a message. It’s trying to tell us that we are attracted and in some way emotionally invested with a member of the opposite sex. A woman, for instance, first knows she’s attracted when she becomes jealous. This hard-wired emotion is built to protect what we want for ourselves and to help motivate us to go get the very thing in which we are jealous for. Some say this is a problem, but where there is a problem, there is always an opportunity for growth.

Despite the temptation to do so in the field, don’t let this emotion take you over. Instead we use it to your advantage: mostly with the hotties in the bar that you want to have attracted to you, but for anything really. And that’s where the jealousy plotline comes in, why it works, and how it can become very useful to you. Now I’m not about to get into all the different ways you can do this i.e. using a pivot, displaying major DHV that a female can relate to etc - that’s all covered in Revelations (you HAVE bought that by now, haven’t you?) This article is mainly here to inform you on how to identify jealousy within yourself, within others and how to deal with it from there.

Now we all know what jealousy is. However, most people seem to believe we always act on the facts presented to us. WRONG! If that were the case then you’d be able to go to the bar tonight and never have to worry about loosing your cool to a feeling of jealousy. But this is not the case. Chances are that you act on it as an emotion and thrash out just like a jealous person would next time it comes around. As a PUA you should know that you should always be aware of your emotions. So the next time something happens to you while you’re out in the field, on a day two, or even in a relationship you need to identify the fact that you are feeling jealous and decide to deal with things rationally.

Now what? Well, what’s the situation? Jealousy is usually triggered in the field by a member of the same sex imposing on your set. You need to calm down and deal with it RIGHT NOW. Don’t over react in these situations like a typical jealous person would. Jealousy will only get you the opposite of what you want. So what does that mean? It means stop being a little bitch and take control of the situation. Acting distant or moody or getting snappy with people isn’t going to help you. Starting an argument or making your target feel bad for talking to another guy is certainly not going to help you. You are only feeling jealous because you don’t feel in control, or you are feeling insecure about what is happening and don’t know what to do. As such you will act in a very reactive manner and the results of this are usually poor. Re-evaluate the situation and take control; is it another dude hitting up your girl? Act intelligently and unreactively and everything you’ve learned about dealing with these guys will give you a clear idea of how to deal with him. AMOG the guy and lower his value, go off and open a nearby set, spike the target’s buying temperature and make the OTHER GUY jealous. There is no need to feel jealousy yourself, but there is plenty of need to make other people feel it.

After analyzing the effects jealousy can have on us and how much it can change a social scene, don’t you think it can have the same effect on others? Of course it can, except the only difference is that the people you’re going to be pushing it on don’t know how to deal with it. They will act in the way every other jealous person out there does and if you can do it properly it will almost always work out in your favor. Make a man jealous and he is going to react in ways that’s only going to make you a heck of a lot cooler. Make a girl jealous and you’re only going to make her more attracted to you.

So always keep your cool, analyze any situation you’re in and NEVER let your emotions take a hold of you. You’re a pick up artist, you’re one cool guy. Take hold of any social scene you’re in and play your game to its best. And remember to always keep your smile on you at all times.

- Wild Card

About Wild Card

Wild Card is a seduction writer operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work for Venusian Arts, Wild Card is a card dealer and drummer in a classic rock/new rock band. In his spare time, he takes every opportunity he can to have crazy adventures with his wingmen, Showcase and Prophet.

The Seven Deadly Mistakes of Permanent Fat Loss

1. Only focusing on exercise

This is the most critical error most people trying to lose fat make, nutrition accounts for 70% of your fat loss plan. Yes you read that right 70%, the exercise only accounts for 30%, and so all those of you who are sweating it out at the gym only to go back to burger and fries and dinner are simply wasting your time. You need to really focus on eating the right macronutrient ratio so your body can start metabolizing fat rather than storing it. For most people the right ration of macronutrients are 40% carbohydrate, 30% protein and 30% fat, however each person needs different volumes of food each serving according to their body shape and goals.

2. Following Generic Diets

Following a generic one size fits all diet can only get you so far. Your specific body shape and size is unique, therefore your diet should be too. Your diet and nutrition plan should be customized to your body, your lifestyle and your goals. Most of the popular diets you read about aren?t customized to you specifically and this is where they fail. If you really like eating carbs and decide to go on a zero carb diet to lose weight, you will eventually break and go off the diet. If you are allergic to certain foods, or are a vegetarian, or just don?t like certain foods you shouldn?t be forced to eat any of them on your diet. Most generic diets fail when it comes to this kind of personalization and as a
result are useless to most people.

3. Not Doing Resistance Training

Strength training (or weight training) is one of the most important things you can do for weight loss. It builds muscle and helps burn fat all at the same time. During a strength training workout you will burn fat and calories during the workout, but you will also have a lasting calorie burning effect because your body will be busy building some new muscle. This is the true key to effective weight loss, each pound of muscle you put on your body burns an extra 50 calories at rest, this can mean an unbelievable 19 pounds across a year simply by putting on 3 pounds of muscle!

4. Doing the Wrong Type of ?Cardio?

While nutrition and resistance training is a huge component of fat loss. Cardio training helps burn a few more calories and conditions your heart and cardiovascular system. However training in your fat burning zone is NOT the most effective way to shift those unwanted pounds. Traditional long slow cardio workouts will burn some calories and build your conditioning, but they?re not the most efficient way to train. Interval training can achieve greater fat loss in less time than training in the fat burning zone. The most efficient way of blow torching unwanted fat is to complete high intensity interval training, this means using the work rest formula which will get your metabolism racing long after you finish your work out.

5. Not Eating the Right Kinds Of Food

Even though eating less total calories is the only real way to lose weight, eating the right kinds of foods can really help make this easier and satisfying. Let?s say your body burns 1700 calories per day, and you only eat 1000 calories for the next 10 days. You will no doubt lose weight. You will lose weight even if all 1000 calories were from chocolate cake or cheeseburgers. With that said, it wouldn?t be very satisfying to eat that way every day, those types of foods will typically leave you wanting more because of their high sugar load, and they also don?t take up much space in your stomach because they are so dense. You will end up becoming hungry faster and feeling less satisfied than if you ate nutrient dense foods like vegetables and fruits. The total amount of calories you eat is always the factor that will determine if you gain or lose weight, but the kinds of food you eat will determine if you will feel satisfied and happy while you?re losing the weight. This is why the kinds of food you eat matter.

6. Failing to set an outcome goal

If you don?t set a destination goal how will you know if you get there.? One of the most crucial aspects of losing weight is to set a clear SMART goal. It needs to be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timed. On average it is possible to lose a couple of pound a week, with this in mind if you want to lose a stone of body fat, it would take around 7 weeks to lose. Now that you have a clear goal you can start getting feedback on your progress, if for example it is week four and you have only lost a pound you know something isn?t working, you need to review what you are doing and try something else. Without that regular feedback you never know you are on track, so set a clear outcome with a time of when you want to achieve your desired body weight.

7. Not training hard enough

If your doing your cardio reading a magazine simply forget fat loss, if you are not sore from your workout you didn?t train hard enough, it?s as simple as that. You only need to train for around 50 minutes maximum, it should be hard and intense and leave you fatigued. To build the muscle needed for effective weight loss you need to create muscle damage, this means over loading the muscle, if your workout is not making you sore in the next 24-48 hours you need to change your workout routine. Each program should only last for four weeks before your body will get used to it, so rotate your training program.

Steve Jacks

About Steve Jacks

Steve Jacks is considered an international expert in health and fitness, he has worked with hundreds of people all around the world helping them to totally transform their body shape, shed excess pounds and pack on muscle. He is co-founder of London?s most exclusive Personal Training Facility The 25 Club, where he helps everyday people, celebrities and athletes achieve the ultimate physique.

Using Facebook

As most of you already know Facebook has taken over in terms of social interaction of the younger generation. Facebook is great for many reasons. Here?s a few of them you can use to your advantage:

-Show high value in notes
-Demonstrate pre-selection
-Create time bridges

There are also many more ways. When you number or e-mail close a new target, I recommend always asking if they are on Facebook and if they are immediately add them. Your response rate will be higher than text messages and significantly higher than calling. It’s also a great way of building your social circle as you can use the event invitation function to your advantage by attending events as well as recruiting people to your own event. Facebook is the greatest tool online in terms of building comfort. When you close a new target I recommend leaving wall posts once every day or two until the next meeting, and demonstrate value in every message to them. Build conspiracy by sending little cocky, funny messages privately to them, and increase your communication. Also, if you have mutual friends go to the mutual friends page and leave comments about your recent target. Staying active in Facebook will dramatically improve your odds in social circle game and also is a great asset in establishing day twos and preventing flakes.

Recommendations:

-Post messages on walls of the highest value women you know in order to entice reciprocal comments. This will show pre-selection to those just getting to know you.

-Blog about the exciting things happening in your life. If you are going bungee jumping tell the world about it because many interest activities make an interesting human being.

-Create events and invite Facebook friends on a frequent basis. This will demonstrate leadership on your part and will increase your value to targets.

-Send personalized messages to targets at least once a week and definitely on holidays. One PUA I talked to sent messages for five years to an out of town target till she finally came out to visit. There is a difference between neediness and persistent thoughtful commenting. Doing the latter yields results.

Good luck and happy sarging!

Simeon

About Simeon

Simeon is a VA Coachoperating out of California. After winning the title of Master Pick-Up Artist on Season 2 of VH1?s The Pick-Up Artist, Simeon has chosen to further his training with Mystery and Matador as he continues the everlasting journey of improvements in the pickup arts. Now he has chosen to give value to others by teaching the arts that have so dramatically transformed his life so that others may share in the enjoyment that pickup creates through the rigorous but rewarding journey of pickup artist training provides.

Hawaii on Opening

I have opened more sets than I can count but my best estimate is around 10,000 cold approach sets. When I first moved to Vegas over 4 years ago, I went out 7 days a week for at least 4 hours a day and just opened constantly. There are endless sets in Vegas so someone could easily open over a 100 sets a day in only a few short hours. The sets are not just in the clubs here, but literally everywhere on the Strip.

When I first started in the game I used the David Bowie opener, and the 80s song opener. I used these openers so many times that girls called me out on it weeks later. One time Mystery and I were walking through Treasure Island several years ago and a girl walked by me, pointed at me and said, ?Hey, it?s the David Bowie guy!? I had no idea who she was but she certainly recognized me from the opener that I had run on several hundred sets.

I stopped using opinion type openers after a while because I realized that they were too long and the set would take too long to give their opinion. I was in fact ?milking? the opener. You should never milk your opener. Most new guys spend too much time on the opener and sometimes don?t even get into A2; they get blown out on the opener because it is too long, boring, etc. I never get blown out anymore on the opener because the openers I use are so short and I transition directly into A2 right after the opener without hesitating. The only purpose of the opener is to open the set so you can transition into A2. I soon found that the best openers are the shortest.

The most important thing when opening is your body language, tonality and facial expressions. It is best to open over the shoulder when possible. You should smile before you open and say anything, then once you start talking, don?t smile too much because it is too try hard. You should use a warm, friendly tone while body rocking in and out to which is a nonverbal false time constraint. This gives the appearance that you are leaving and not staying long. This nonverbal false time constraint can be coupled with a verbal false time constraint such as ?I can only stay for a second, I have my friends here.?

When opening, it is much more important how you say something that what you actually say. So many guys get caught up in and stuck on the opener. If you are looking for the perfect opener there isn?t one. Sometimes now I will just say in Mystery?s tonality ?Hello, Hello? as my opener. That?s it, and then I will transition directly into A2. I will talk a lot more about opening in future articles. If you have any specific questions on opening or inquires about training email me at Hawaii@venusianarts.com or call me at 702-286-7785

Hawaii

About Hawaii

Hawaii is a VA Coach operating out of Las Vegas. He has instructed at nearly fifty (50) live bootcamps and seminars and trained hundreds of students over 3 years working for Mystery. He traveled with Mystery and Matador for more than a year and taught at over 25 bootcamps as an approach coach during his training period before becoming a lead instructor at over a dozen bootcamps. Not the typical player, Hawaii is a short, skinny, 30-something, average looking Asian guy, former accountant, who transformed himself into someone who is successful with women after years of practice working thousands of sets. Hawaii is Mystery's former Personal Assistant and has been working with him for 3 years since August 2005. In addition, Hawaii trained all of the students on season 2 of VH-1's The Pickup Artist as an off-camera Instructor for the entire duration of filming.

Knack’s Theory on Teaching Pickup

Knack’s Theory on Teaching Pickup

Those of you that have had the opportunity to work with me know that I favor an approach to pickup that emphasizes a person?s natural abilities, talents, and personalities. I do this for many reasons, not the least of which is that many people that are learning pick up are not ?broken?. They do NOT need to be ?fixed?. There are people that will try to tell you that who you are as a human being is fundamentally wrong, severely flawed, or hopelessly crippled. I think this is a disservice, not only to the student, but to all of humanity. People all have amazing gifts and an inner radiance that people want to get to know, and will make the lives of people around them more luminous for their having passed through it. However, many people do not know how to display themselves to others in a way that is appealing and attractive. This is the epitome, the true apex of what pickup should become in your life. Pickup is an outlet not to randomly have sex with women, but to display to everyone around you both the wonder of the human being you are, and the human being that you have the POTENTIAL to become.

When I was working behind the scenes with the contestants of ?The Pickup Artist 2?, I recognized that many of the contestants had incredible potential. Rian recently told me when he was visiting me in DC ?I liked who I was. I always knew I was a great guy. The problem was that no one else recognized it. So either I wasn?t a good person, or I wasn?t making who I was clear to people.? Rian summed my view on matters pretty well. Someone like him doesn?t need to be scrapped and torn down. They only need to be tweaked. However, there is an exception to this general rule: the person that doesn?t like who they are (for whatever reason). This type is fundamentally broken and actually does need to be fixed. This type of person can be either a butterfly, or a train wreck. At any rate, it requires a great deal more work and effort in order to change this person into a pickup machine. That is because not only do that have to learn the same skills everyone else does, but they have the added problem of changing their lives. You first have to start with what the person wants to become, and then build a plan of action for the transformation. It is usually a painful and long process, but with guidance and perseverance, it can be achieved.

Those that are not willing to work hard, accept guidance, and metamorphosize into what they want to become, will crash and burn, and it isn?t pretty to watch. In the end, with the right teacher and a strong will, anyone can improve their lives and attract women. It is in those moments of acceptance of an extended hand that we achieve greatness, and when we are great, women follow. Once, the greatest minds extended their hands to me: John Gray (Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus), Sean Messenger, Mehow, Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop, and Hawaii. It is my pleasure, duty, and privilege to be able to teach attraction, seduction, and relationship skills to men, and extend to you the same hand of brotherhood that years ago was extended to me. It is I, which thank all of you for making that honor possible.

—-Knack

About Knack

Knack is a VA Coach and a world traveler. Knack is an elementary school teacher, and uses his background as a professional educator to take a student specific approach to teaching pick up. He has picked up various languages throughout his journeys and travels to three or four new countries per year in his quest to experience various cultures.

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 1

The Art of Erotic Foreplay - Part 1 - Making foreplay your best friend

I know what you?re thinking. ?I followed all the tips and advice Matador gave me. I changed the way I dressed, talked, acted, and now I find myself in the position I use to dream about. I?m about to have sex!? In dreams, everything seems to work out exactly the way we fantasize about it. We see ourselves as Casanova or Don Juan, seducing the maiden and providing her with pleasure beyond her wildest dreams. However, all the dreams in the world aren?t necessarily going to help her sing your sexual praises the next morning. Learning how to become comfortable and knowledgeable about sex are might help her sing that song. My name is Dr. Hernando Chaves, sexologist and sex educator, and I am making it my personal mission to make you a better lover.

In this 4-part article, we?ll be talking about foreplay, often referred to as the forgotten step by women. There are a lot of foreplay questions men ask. How long should foreplay last? What exactly should I do in foreplay? How do I know what she will like? These articles will help you find the answers to those questions. Foreplay is anything and everything we do before intercourse to get our partners feeling sexual and erotic. It?s the preheating of the sexual oven; the stretching and warm up before showcasing your sexual skill. Foreplay is different for men and women. Guys may see an attractive image and have an erection almost immediately. For women, it often takes more time and exploration to reach that state of readiness for sex. Be creative. Foreplay doesn?t have to start in the bedroom. A good lover and erotic expert begins foreplay well before the clothes come off and the sheets get warm. Without even knowing, you might already be setting the stage for pleasurable sexual experiences in your life.

Every woman is different, so adjust your lovemaking and foreplay techniques accordingly. To be a great lover, you are going to have to remember things and pay careful attention to details, sights, sounds, reactions, effectively listen and communicate, and have the sex techniques to back it up. Each woman wants things that are unique and erotic specifically for her. Finding these erotic turn ons will set the stage for emotional connectivity and relaxation. It?s important to help bridge the emotional connection between you and your partner to increase comfort, set her mind at ease, and create a sexual environment for her to explore and let go. Some women may want a man to take charge and others may want a man to allow them to feel empowered. Some women enjoy certain areas of their bodies to be stimulated and others prefer different pressure and intensity to stimulation. Some women want long sessions of foreplay and others need just a few minutes and are ready for sex. You need to be able to identify her needs and adjust your style accordingly. Study her, take careful detailed mental notes and find out what fuels her confidence and comfort level. She?ll feel sexier when she is at ease and feeling confident in herself.

How long should foreplay last? As long as it takes. Stop looking at your watch and start focusing on her mind and body. As much as you want to have penetrative sex right now, the patient lover that allows foreplay to take its course sets the stage for the great sexual experience. Studies show that most women lubricate about 10-30 seconds from the beginning of arousal. That doesn?t mean foreplay should end once lubrication begins. It?s just starting. Other parts of her body may not be ready for sex: her mind, the vaginal cavity, blood circulation, adequate arousal and lubrication.

So relax and take a deep breath. If you?ve made it this far with a woman, you?ve been doing a lot right. The next articles will focus more on foreplay techniques and behaviors. My hope is you will read them, learn from them, and incorporate them into your sex life.

Dr. Chaves
Copyright 2009 Hernando Chaves

Dr. Hernando Chaves is a Clinical Sexologist and Psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA. He holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology, a Master of Arts degree in Marital and Family Therapy, and a Doctorate degree in Human Sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a sex educator and college professor, teaching introduction to human sexuality and advanced human sexuality. He is a Sex Coach and resident Sexologist at www.askmen.com, offering guidance and technique training to become a better, more skilled lover. As a public speaker with national and international experience, Dr. Chaves encourages the pursuit of sexual knowledge and healthy sexual expression.

Phone Game Part 1: Making the First Call

Time on the phone counts towards your seven hours, which means that practicing your phone game is an absolute must. Stop thinking of the phone as a tool for setting up a date, and instead look at it as a tool for building comfort

- Lovedrop, Revelations

Unless you’re only ever making Same-Night-Pulls (and if you are, you are probably shooting yourself in the foot in a lot of other sets), Phone Game can be a crucial part of your game and can be a major sticking point for a lot of Venusian Artists. Anyone who hasn’t got this down yet in their game should make a conscious effort to try to #-close every single set the open. Get as many numbers as you can to practice on, no matter how short or bad your time in the set may have been. The more phone calls you make, the better your phone game will get. Hell, even calling a number that you are certain is a fake or will not respond is still practice and will help you start to feel more comfortable on the phone.

So to help you out, I’ve put together everything I’ve learned about phone game over my years in the field, as well as from other sources like Mehow, TD, Mystery, Lovedrop, and others. This is what works for me, and if you apply a little common sense it should work just as well for you. Since we’ve just rolled out the new site, I’m going to be posting these in a series

Part 1: Making the First Call

The first question that even AFCs ask about calling a woman after you get their number is “when should I call?” Some people say wait two days, some people say wait a week, and some people say call her that night. The truth is that there really is no definite answer. You have to decide when to call based on how your interaction went. I personally like to call her after one or two days, unless it’s a weekend and I know she’ll be busy, in which case I’ll wait until Monday. But if it seems like my game wasn’t exactly on par or she seems like the type to have forgotten me after a couple days, I may call her sooner. I’d personally rather appear a little eager than have to go through the “where do I know you from again?” conversation. It’s a pretty good state-killer. But as I said, there is no definite answer. You have to calibrate based on how the set went.

I’ve personally always liked Mehow’s plan for calling your targets.

The first thing I’ll do is send her a “feeler” text sometime in the early afternoon. This is usually something silly or ridiculous like:

- Bunnies are out to get me!

- OMG there’s WATER falling from the SKY!

- Excuse me, do you have any Grey Pupon?

- It’s really a shame we have to get a divorce, your parents are so rich.

- I’m too high maintenance for you

- Stop flirting with me, I’m too busy right now

- You’re sleeping on the couch tonight, young lady

- Under my umbrella ella ella eh eh eh

- I saw a bobble-head in a store today that looked like you

- I think I just saw Jesus and Santa talking outside of a Mc Donald’s

- Why is there no blue food?

- Someone left a rose on my doorstep this morning and I have no idea who it was

- I didn’t want to do this over text, but I can’t keep this from you anymore: I’m pregnant. What are we going to do?!

- I feel so old sometimes. I think I’m going to buy suspenders and take up bingo

You may or not get a response to your text. If she does respond, carry the thread humorously for a couple of texts back and forth, and then stop responding on a high note.

Example:

Prophet: God I feel so old sometimes! I think I’m going to buy suspenders and take up bingo

HB: u should get glasses with strings on them so u dont loose them

Prophet: and then I’ll start telling the same stories all over and over again and call all you kids whippersnappers

HB: Haha and start every story with well back in MY day?

And then I’ll just stop responding. From there, I’ll wait a few hours and then call her later in the evening. This way you are fresh in her mind and because you just went silent on a high note. If your text game was tight, she’ll be wanting more and will be far more likely to pick up when you call.

However, occasionally you will get a slightly needy or extremely interested girl, and she will still send you texts, even after you have stopped responding. Use your judgment here to decide whether she is being creepy/needy or if she just wants a little more you. She’s sending you IOIs with every message she sends you after you stop responding, so if you decide that it’s the latter you can just call her right then if you want. And if she calls YOU, be sure to answer and say something like “Haha, just couldn’t get enough of me, could you?”

If she doesn’t respond to your initial text, DO NOT SEND HER MORE. Wait until the evening and just call her anyway.

If she picks up when you call, immediately use callback humor. Call her a brat, a troublemaker, your attack kitten - whatever nickname you gave her when you were gaming her. And if you aren’t using nicknames in your sets? Get on that man! It builds conspiracy and will make you stand out from the rest of the AFCs that hit on her that night. It doesn’t HAVE to be a nickname necessarily, however. Any form of callback humor will work, as long as you’re fairly certain that she will remember it.

Next week: Part 2 - How to Talk To Her On The Phone

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

Who We Are, What We Do

Over the past ten years, we have systematically developed the most effective methods in the world for attracting and dating beautiful women.

Our ideas first came to mainstream prominence in Neil Strauss? best-selling book, The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists and then later on the hit show The Pickup Artist on VH1.

We have cracked the code to human emotions and social intelligence, and now our mission is to continually refine our art and to make this technology available to others who seek to learn it.

As our thousands of students worldwide have learned for themselves, our system is real, and it gets results. Whether you want to feel socially empowered, you?re looking to meet the right girl, or you just want better dating options, the Venusian Arts can make it happen for you.

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