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By: Colgate and Discovery

The concept of being able to acquire a skill set in order to handle the Alpha Male in the group. The idea for most to be able to blow out the guys that generally succeeded in getting the girls prior to our knowledge of pick up can make any person excited. The reason why AMOGing works is because you can systematically take the attention away from other men who are competing for attention. By holding court, re-framing, and being in your own head space, you can successfully handle the threads AMOGs will throw at you.

The weird thing about AMOGing is that, while strangers will do it to you without hesitation, your best friends will too (keep in mind, when in-field your wing should never attempt to AMOG you). What I have noticed is that when two people have a connection in their friendship, they tend to banter with each other more than two individuals that do not share that connection. This is how Discovery and I developed the concept of WING-MOGING.

Wing-moging is a concept where wings can display a strong brotherhood and camaraderie by banter with each other. The routine not only displays a connection between the two, but also has DHV spikes embedded in that will set off attraction switches. The reason that the attraction is generated when viewing the display of connection is due to her sub conscious thought that is she aligns with one of the guys, she is guaranteed the social network, protection, resources and love from his wing and the other guys in his group.

The guys who have a strong connection with each other and have a tight "Entourage" game, can also be remembered much more by using wing-mog tactics. This will lead to the entire group being invited to better social occasions, girls tell their friends about the "friends" and say things like "you should meet these guys, they are so much fun”. You gain instant pre-selection to other targets by the girl who witnessed the wing-moging. Girls will invite us along because she knows her friends will appreciate her for meeting such awesome guys (which is rare). By Discovery and I using our wing-moging tactics, we can add to the social value and energy to the group. The possibilities become endless.

Example: Let's say Discovery is making fun of my beard

Discovery: What’s with the animal on your face bro?
Colgate: Man the chicks won't let me shave it, you should try it baby face!
Discovery: You know my girls like that "I've just had a face wax feel". Anyways your new Miss November girl surely can't like the feel of a badger scratching her bikini line!
Colgate: Man, (with exaggerated hand gestures) Miss November isn’t interested in my facial badger, she wants access to my Jurassic Park area! (Strokes groin area with cheeky smile)
Discovery: Why's that bro, cause it hides a monster? (said teasingly)
Colgate: Hey we are among friends here (puts arm around group and pulls them in and whispers) honestly more like a hamster. (when delivery is flawless the result is shrieks of laughter)
Colgate: So bro now that we are sharing how did the operation go (more serious tone)
Discovery: I will only get into it because I feel we are amongst friends, but it hurt like childbirth. You women have breast augmentations, BUT did u know you could literally double your length and increase your girth by 3 time!!! (pause) Now that the bandages are off, (release) I am so proud of my 3 inches!!!!
(Both guys howl with laughter while displaying to the group a connection in their friendship)

The idea is to generate a great vibe, embed DHV’s, show a tight brotherhood, while also not compromising each others values. Keep in mind this is not AMOGing, this is not meant to blow anyone out of the set. If anything it raises the value of both guys. Discovery and I can not tell you how many times this routine has led to us to being upgraded to V.I.P booths, celebrity after parties, invites to exclusive events, etc. We have also used it to skip lines at exclusive clubs when we have not had any pre-selection at all. When the guys have a strong frame and they demonstrate their brotherhood on the in they can easily persuade the bouncers that they offer value to the club. It is a very powerful gambit to add to you arsenal.

A word of advice, the delivery of both guys must be not only flawless but must also be genuine. Practice this enough until it comes off natural and real. It should not be scripted or feel scripted. When tight friends’ vibe together the energy they transmit is very powerful, Discovery and I developed this concept intuitively due to our tight brotherhood.

Another idea to keep in mind is that it can be done in front of other guys. Those guys who normally might try to be difficult or attempt to AMOG will sit back and observe both guys wing-moging. This will leave them with no place to interject and attempt to AMOG because they can not compete with two dominant forces putting out a great vibe, therefore, this is ideal for mixed set.

FIVE WING-MOG TIPS

1. Divide holding court: By dividing the attention, both guys can hit the attraction switches equally and be perceived as high value.
2. Feed off each others energy: When both guys are enjoying each others stories and adding value through laughter, the group will feel the emotional richness and enjoy the company of both guys.
3. Don’t under any circumstances make each other look bad: Wing-moging is meant to increase the value for BOTH guys. Do not make each other look bad, by one guy making his friend look bad, it in turn lowers his value.
4. Be comfortable displaying physical contact with each other: Hug your wing and do it comfortably. Not only will this give you plausible deniability to hug the girls more but it will visually show the connection of the brotherhood.
5. Be okay with laughing at yourself: If you are comfortable with laughing at yourself and your wing is as well, both of you can gain from the possibilities by telling stories of each other (be sure to embed DHV’s).

This concept has proven effective in many dynamical situations. We have ran venues with our vibe and have people remember us on a first name basis wherever we go. People are attracted to people who show appreciation for other people. They will not only attempt to be a part of your social circle, but they will go out of their way as well.

- Colgate

About Colgate

Colgate is a VA Coach operating out of New York City. He is known for conveying a rock star personality in-field, adding humor, energy, intrigue, and other characteristics that contribute to the vibe and energy of the club. Along with being a VA Coach, Colgate is a successful magician, author, and recording artist. He is currently finishing his dual degree in Social Psychology with a concentration in sexual studies.

Tags: amoging, attraction, Colgate, Discovery, entourage, girls, how to roll, pick-up, pua, set, wing

Phone Game Part 7: Etiquette While Being A Busy Man

January 6, 2010 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

This is part seven of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

Etiquette is important when you are on the phone. Proper phone etiquette conveys social intelligence and is a DHV. Yet sadly it is something which most people simply do not have. These days, people do a lot of annoying things when they are talking to a person on the phone. As a PUA you need to be a man who not only doesn’t do those things, but also a man who doesn’t stand for it when someone else does them to you. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

One of the most annoying things that happens on the phone is when you call someone and they are busy with something else and not giving you their full attention. If you call her up and she sounds distracted or busy or like she’s with friends or at work, cut the call short. Have you ever called a woman and then, in the middle of a sentence, had to stop because she got distracted by something else on her end of the phone and was ignoring you? It’s annoying and rude and as a PUA, you should be too busy to sit and wait for her to finish talking to her friend while you are sitting there on the phone alone. Just say “You sound pretty busy over there. How about I call you back.” This will build comfort because it shows that you are mindful of what is going on in her life, and build value because it conveys that you just don’t have time to sit around and wait for her to pay attention to you. If she realizes that she was being rude, she might apologize, in which case you can say “Oh it’s no problem. I just don’t like talking to someone when they can’t give me their full attention. Don’t worry about it.” Do this with a friendly and understanding tone. Do not sound disappointed, angry, or annoyed. She’s a busy girl just like you, and you understand and respect that. You would simply prefer to talk to her when she’s not distracted.

This same rule should apply to you if things start coming up on your end as well. If you cant be sure that you can commit 100% to the conversation without being distracted by external factors, then just let her know that and call her back later. Just say “Hey I’ve got ______ happening over here, and I know how much I hate talking to someone who is distracted by something on their end, so how about I call you back?” This can be a very powerful because it shows that you expect whoever you are talking to on the phone to show you the same courtesy and won’t put up with that kind of rudeness on the phone.

However, having said all that, you can build a tremendous amount of value if you ARE distracted by something important that is happening on your end of the phone. Most of the time, I will answer my phone if I know that she will hear the sounds of adventure and excitement in the background. If there are people laughing, shouting or shrieking excitedly, or if there is music playing in the background then I’ll answer as I’m leaving the room so that she can still hear the noise but will be able to hear me fine. The key here is to let her know that you can only talk for a second because you are in the middle of something, but still talk to her for a little longer so that she can try to hear what is going on. If your target asks you what you are up to you should use your best judgment regarding whether you should tell her or just be coy about it. You’re probably not going to want to tell her that you’re all just playing Call of Duty at your apartment, but you are going to tell her if you’re having some drinks at a friend’s place while he grills up some steaks. The idea here is to demonstrate that you are a busy, sociable guy who has a lot going on in his life. Just be sure to remember the rules for etticate described above when you do this.

Another important rule to remember here is to never give her the impression that you are TRYING to keep her on the phone when she doesn’t want to be. The moment you sense that she’s isn’t really invested in the conversation, end the call. If applicable, get her to call you back, but add in that she can’t call you during a certain period because you will be busy then yourself. The phone is all about comfort. Not just building it, but preserving it as well. She should never feel uncomfortable talking to you on the phone and it should never feel like you are TRYING to keep her there. In fact, it’s a good rule of thumb to end the call before she does, that way you can be sure that you are never dragging things out too long.

Finally, DO NOT rely on texting for your phone game. This is another common trend amongst new PUAs: they see texting (and also online messaging) as a way to avoid the awkwardness and anxiety of a phone call and so they only ever text their targets. But unless you’re dealing with extremely young or immature girls, most women will tell you that a man who texts her instead of calling is probably doing it because he’s too afraid to call her and is thusly is not going to get a date with her.

Don’t believe me? Make this into your opener (“Hey guys, phone or text?”) and find out for yourself. Women are a lot more perceptive about these things than you think.

Texting should be used for sending silly messages back and forth, to let her know you’re thinking of her, or maybe sending a quick update on plans you have already made (see my previous articles on phone game for more on this). It is VASTLY more difficult to build comfort via text than it is through a phone call. People need to hear a voice. They need to feel your emotions when you tell a story. Far too much of the meaning in your communication is lost in text messaging. It’s for this very reason that I almost never add my targets to MSN, Facebook, or any of that stuff until after we have had - at the very least - a solid Day-2.

Well that’s it for phone game. I think I covered everything I’ve learned here in these articles. Check back soon for my next article on make sure you and your wings are learning the most from each other.

About Prophet

Prophet is a VA Coach operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work as an instructor/site admin for Venusian Arts, Prophet is a software consultant at a leading software development firm. In his spare time, he finances, writes, and produces independent films with his wingmen, Showcase and Wild Card.

Tags: girls, opener, phone game, Prophet, pua, women

My Home is Where I Game

December 15, 2009 by Moonlight
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Here you are. You’ve arrived to your venue and chances are this will be your only venue for the night. You’re fully excited, you’ve been planning it for hours, your cheat sheet is in your pocket, your breath is fresh, you are already in a talkative mood and ready for some action. But there’s one thing that suddenly seems to attack your mind: it’s your first time in this venue.

Aside from the friends you came with, there’s nothing you know in this place. Yes you’ve heard about it of course a lot of times and you probably know what kind of bar or club it is, but that won’t change the fact that you’re a newbie there and so you are penetrating the unknown. For some, this might not cause any problem but for others it seems to be like a devastating thought and you might feel so uncomfortable that your game could be completely ruined in the first seconds of your entry. So how can this feeling go away? Well it all depends on you my friend!

The reason why you feel unsure is because thousands of years ago going to an unknown field was a real danger. If the people of that field wouldn’t accept you as one of theirs, chances were your existence would end. Today we luckily live in a different era but in our heads we still feel this fear. As it is for the approach, the fear of the unknown keeps coming back and you need to learn how to deal with it. The good news is, it’s actually very easy to get rid of this feeling.

First of all before entering the venue put yourself in the right state of mind! Your goal of the night is to have fun and meet people. Yes of course you’re there to pick up girls, but don’t make a big deal out of it. Don’t tell yourself : “I have to pick up girls” but try rather this: “I’m excited to have fun and make new friends”. Repeat this to yourself at least 10 times. That way you will already feel less stressed before you make your entry.

Once you are in the venue imagine you are entering your own living room. Now honestly; how do you feel when you are in your living room? Exactly, you’re relaxed and you don’t give a damn about anything. So why would it be different in here? Keep that picture of your living room for as long as you can or as long as you need to.

Don’t wait till you get in that state. Open immediately! Whether it’s the blond Diva next to the toilets or the fatty at the bar, it doesn’t matter. Make yourself at home! Wave to your (non existing) friend, smile, high-five girls or guys. Would you do all this if you were hosting a party at your place? Of course you would!

Whatever happens in the venue, good or bad, always ask yourself how you would react if you were at home. Do I care if a girl rejects me? No it’s cool, let’s move on. Do I care if a guy tries to AMOG me? Nope, I’m smarter than him and I don’t fall into his game. It’s my home, my Game.

The last thing you need to do to completely forget that you have never been in this venue is to really believe that you are the owner. Walk in a way that conveys that you are a leader. Get your hands together on your lower back with a straight position and chat with anyone as if you were the president.

Wherever you go, there will always be a first time and if the fear of the unknown threatens to kill your night it’s more important to be prepared for that then for your Game itself. When you have the right state of mind, nothing can go wrong. So make yourself at home, any time, any place.

Moonlight

About Moonlight

Moonlight is a VA Coach operating out of Antwerp, Belgium and has been in the Seduction Community since 2005. He is a VA Coach and In-Field Instructor. In addition, he is a dancer, singer and actor. Moonlight is passionate about Psychology and Social Interaction.

Tags: game, girls, Moonlight, open, venue

The Last Hour

November 29, 2009 by Colgate
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

It's the last hour before you head out. It is familiar for all of us whether we were aware or not. It is basically the last few preperations before heading out to that target rich venue in to what is expected to be a great night. This does not include the usual such as showering, shaving, picking out outfits, etc. This is what you do in the last hour before you role. Before we do head out, we have to prepare ourselves on all levels so that we can present our best selves. So what areas must we work on in order to accomplish this, well here are the most important ones:

Get into a talkative state: This is extremely important because if you are not in a talkative state by the time you arrive at the venue, you are simply wasting precious time that you could have put to more beneficial use. There are 2 ways that I recommend that guys approach this objective.

If you with your buddies run your material on them: Practicing your routines and gambits on the guys that you’re going out with is a great way to get into a talkative state. It actually serves as a multi-purpose drill because not only will you get into a talkative state but you will also get feedback on your delivery and tonality. If you’re by yourself, call a friend, parents, uncle, etc and talk to them about their day: This is also a great way to get into a talkative state if you are sarging by yourself. By calling someone you get to talk to someone you are comfortable with and as a result you will get into a talkative state.

Run through your cheat sheet and stack cards: This is extremely important so that the information you have is fresh in your head. Nothing spoils a set more than when you are in it and run out of things to say. As result, you are left lingering there and it lowers your value. Ideally, you should go through your cheat sheet and stack cards twice. Why not even three times. The more you familiarize yourself with your material the better it will sound. Just avoid sounding robotic in your delivery; this could also ruin a set.

Have your default opener memorized: We have all been there, we see a set and then……NOTHING! We didn’t follow the 3-second rule and walk up to the set because we had nothing to say. It’s a feeling every guy feels. Some of us turn our bodies away from the set (DLV), some walk past it or hover (DLV), and some blank out and can not think of anything to say. By having a default opener you can assure that this will not happen to you. Also it becomes useful when situations present themselves to you and you need a quick opener to get things rolling. Run your opener smoothly and persistently and you will become a master at it.

Smile for 3 mins straight: When you smile you feel better. This is due to the endorphins that your body releases when you are smiling. By keeping a smile (even a fake smile), your body will flush itself with endorphins and get you in a great mood. It is important to get into that happy and carefree state of mind before walking into the venue. By smiling in your power hour, you will walk into the venue with the biggest smile.

Breathing exercises: Nothing relaxes the body more than simple breathing exercises. Most people underestimate the power of breathing exercises due to the action being so mundane and familiar. Practice breathing in fully from the nose, then hold your breath to the mental count of 4, and finally release your breathe slowly through your mouth. Repeat 4 more times or until you feel relaxed.

20 push ups: Push ups are a great way to release that extra bit of tension before stepping out of the house. It will exert the negative energy away from your body and simultaneously pump testosterone and endorphins through your body. If push ups are too difficult, try doing 20 jumping jacks, or jog in place. The idea is to get into a great state of mind while inhibiting all the bad emotions and tension that may linger sub consciously. Once you’ve completed the objectives above, you should be feeling great. You should be prepared, relaxed, happy, and determined to make the night the best night possible. Remember stay agenda free and out come independent and you will excel your interactions. Keep in mind to always learn from every interaction and keep barreling through. Mastery happens with patience, experience and persistency, but it does happen.

-Colgate

About Colgate

Tags: clubs, Colgate, dating, going out, hour, single

Classic Question and Answer with Mystery Part 1

November 3, 2009 by Mystery
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

8 Comments

Q+A with Mystery: Fall 1998

AFC: I was extremely nervous during the 50 day experiment. Even more nervous than I expected to be. I don’t doubt that it showed, at least a little.

Mystery: Then just keep doing this till you PERFECT this. If you can get this right, timing and smile and confidence and playfulness and on and on, then you can move onto other scripts. All the other scripts are just as unassuming sexually speaking as the Elvis one. If you are going to use a script INTRO thing, then tell us first so we know you aren’t fucking up with bad intros like complements or sexual innuendo intros.

AFC: I don’t understand what you mean here. How do I manifest ‘being into myself’ when using the Elvis script?

Mystery: hold a magazine and sorta be reading it as you perform the script. Now remove the mag and there you are. Sorta thinking about this Elvis thing and talking aloud to someone. Outgoing people do this BTW.

AFC: That was my first instinct, but I guess I didn’t stick with it for very long. As he was on his way out of the store and glaring at me with daggers in his eyes, I smiled and gave him a friendly wave. His reaction was to become even angrier.

Mystery: Your getting angry was (nothing personal here) the most pathetic ego driven behavioral non thinking thing you could have done. It was unsophisticated, immature, stupid, lame and un-intellectual. The way to win in this life is no longer by strength. It’s by the brain. Don’t REACT to people. PRO-ACT. Think and win. EVERY SOCIAL interaction requires gambits and strategies like in CHESS. Consider learning chess. You will obtain many insights for girl getting.

AFC: I wasn’t especially creative, but I was honest and polite. It was only later than I responded with the same kind of disrespect that he had shown to me. Perhaps I should just have let him walk away.

Mystery: You didn’t recognize HIS feelings. You didn’t have compassion for HIM. You didn’t attempt to connect to the fact that you are both guys and her COULDA been a buddy if this didn’t occur. Bull shit baffles brains and by just misdirecting their attention with bullshit talk (fake facial tics or make random guttural noises). It’s FUN to fuck with people this way if they behave incorrectly. Don’t give them the same talk back, go one step ahead … think CHESS.

AFC: I imagine if I had thrown myself on the floor and started bawling like an infant, he would simply have walked away, thinking he had ‘won.’

Mystery: And then you yell, ‘Nooooooo, don’t …. GOOOOO!!!!’ You are so fucked up man. WINNER. Who’s the winner - he got the girl fucker. Of course he’s the winner. Nothing you can do can make you the winner when HE has the girl.

AFC: I’m not sure anybody would have recognized it as a joke. What does that gain me?

Mystery: Not the girl, so then what you COULD have gained. You aren’t exactly thinking as a player or pick up artist. You could have done this so over dramatically that it would throw him greatly.

AFC: Maybe it’s different at the clubs that you’re familiar with, but at the ‘18 and up’ type clubs that I can get into, I just can’t imagine going to a club by myself. I mean, I would just feel absolutely humiliated.

Mystery: And you don’t feel humiliated by our knowing you don’t have the sex appeal enough to have a girlfriend? Does that not … humiliate … you? Alright, so you go alone. You don’t have to TELL anyone. Just say your friend is in here somewhere. Later, you can say you got ditched or something. Your friend went home with a girl.
Easy.

AFC: Everyone would be looking at me like, ‘Why are you here by yourself?’, because everyone, I mean everyone, goes to these clubs with friends.

Mystery: I WORK in clubs dude. This is Bull Shit. Go alone. You can lie. Make friends.

AFC: Is this not the feeling you get when you go to a 21 and over club by yourself? How you deal with this? Since I’m not much of a dancer, I know that I would just feel too awkward about the whole situation, I’d spend maybe 5/10/15 minutes sort of standing by myself trying to look ‘cool’, and then it would get to me and I’d leave.

Mystery: Go alone. Don’t dance. MEET. Go from group to group in there talking to people. Make friends of everyone. Be fun. How can a girl be interested in you if you aren’t INTERESTING in the first place dude. Don’t stand there with a beer you your limp wristed hand. Don’t try to ‘look’ cool. Be cool by chatting with EVERYONE. When I can’t get a friend to go with me (Like yesterday by good buddy Tal bailed out on going downtown with me) I go out alone. I went out alone yesterday. That’s right. Am I humiliated? Well let’s see … I got two girls #s. How many did YOU get?!! Ok, that’s said and done.

Ah fuck who I am talking to away - If you are so insecure about being alone, you will not have the guts to actually approach girls anyway. Stay home.

AFC: There’s something about having friends wit you that allows you to convey the impression that you’re not needy even if/when you get rejected.

Mystery: Girls want guys who are confident enough to go ABOVE this whole thing. In fact, I even TOLD them I came down alone when my buddy bailed on me. And I had a fucking BLAST. I made two new guy buds and got 2 girls #s. OH, AND I met about 10 chicks that night and chatted with them and I even got a drink bought for me. So there. All alone I went. How humiliating.

Tags: afc, friends, girl, Mystery

Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop & Discovery Review by Dyyz

September 23, 2009 by Blitz
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

This should have been titled “All Instructors in LA Bootcamp.” Everyone was there except Hawaii that I have read about either from reviews or the forums. I mean, Kosmo and Joe D. from Season 1 of the Pickup Artist and Simeon, Greg and Brian from Season 2 were all there to help out, both in the classroom setting, as well as in-field. There was something to be learned from each and every one of them, and they are all very good.

The Classroom:

In the classroom settings you get two sessions with each instructor, Mystery, Matador, and Lovedrop; one one each day. The guys always run over the alloted time but that’s just because they have so much to teach and there isn’t nearly enough time for it all. At one point Mystery asked one of the other guys “are we making a schedule or running a bootcamp?” They want to make sure that they can instill every piece of knowledge possible in the time they have. I will do my best to touch on the ideas without saying too much, you have to see these guys explain it. It’s the difference from reading it to seeing it done.

Mystery’s classroom sessions included an indepth overview of the process and then an expanded session on the qualification step of the method. Mystery has so much information in his head that he cannot stop teaching. His teachings are thorough and very easy follow. He teaches the basic method that most everyone out there uses as the foundation for other methods or styles. Which is not entirely basic but it is easiest for an AFC to follow.

Lovedrop’s classroom experience is interesting as well because he openly admits that he knows he has to take most of the people in the classroom out that very same night and he teaches what will have the biggest impact on the students the quickest. That’s not to say that he isn’t thorough, it’s just that through experience, he’s learned what has the fastest results from the classroom to the in-field experience. I have also read where people are comming down on Lovedrop because he says “Mystery would say…” that’s because the process is so internalized for all of the instructors that in order to teach it, they have to actively think about what they do and what is the best way to teach it. As as I just said, the “basic” method that Mystery teaches is the one that gets the best results from the students the quickest. Lovedrop covers the inner game as well as kino escalation. The biggest thing I took away from his sessions is the ability to help control approach anxiety.

Matador’s classroom time was entirely different. He explains early on that he uses a different process than the other guys. He also explains that he goes through all of the method’s steps from A1 to C1 in a matter of seconds. It’s just all in how he calibrates and executes. His biggest topic is attraction. The so-called Matador Mayhem is based around sexual tension and is amazing. This guy has a way of breaking down what he does and how it works so that even an AFC could at least, attempt to do what he does.

Discovery dosn’t spend too much time with the students in the classroom. He is the one who debriefs with the students and he help fine tune what he saw in-field. He has a charisma about he that he passes on to the students in the delivery of the material. I wish we had more time with this guy, because he has a lot to offer the community.

The Pickup Artist guys all came in and joined us when it was time to breakup into smaller groups to practice the material and delivery. They are exponentially better than they were even at the end of the TV show. They help you with the details, from body language to vocal tonality and they can help out a lot because they have all been where all of us were before.

All of these guys have a way of explaining and breaking down things so that you not only know what to do, but know why it works so that you can apply it to yourself and your avatar and lifestyle. These guys tell you that the canned material they give you should only be used about 6 weeks then you should be able to come up with your own material. This is why the way that they teach is so effective.

In-Field:

I’m not sure I can explain the in-field experience better than anyone else, so I’ll just give a quick recap of what I experienced. First off, the first night they got us into the VIP room of the hottest club in LA. Now this was no easy task, there were over 20 guys and maybe 4 women in the group, so they pulled some strings to make that happen,a nd it was worth it. There were celebrities, reality TV personalities and prettymuch, you had to be somebody to be there, and we got to practice in that atmosphere. MikeyVegas was dead on when he said we owned the club, and that every guy wanted to be us and every girl wanted to be with us.

Mystery was working his game and it was amazing to watch. The instructors told us that is we see them do something and want to know how they did it, to go up to them and just ask and they will reverse engineer it for us, because just about everything they do is internallized and so it is an unconsious process most of the time for them.

Matador was amazing. He would grab some strange, beautiful girl and simply say, “Here let me introduce you to my friend,” to the girl then pass her off on to the students. Set open. Now don’t get me wrong, it didn’t always work with every girl but I was still in awe of what could be done with practice.
Lovedrop has a style his own in the club. There’s not a funnier guy to watch. He was just himself, but by being himself he demonstrated qualities that women respond to. And he teaches the students how to do the same. He helped me out several times, one especially where I got in my own headspace, he helped me get back to normal and begin opening sets again.

The pivots are phenominal. It’s hard not to look good when Kacey and Erica and the other girls are there with you. They have been doing this for a long time and know exactly when to DHV you and when you whisper in your ear infront of your set. They can do it all. When I wasn’t in set, I went back to find one of the pivots to get my head straight and they would help me open a set. I can’t say enough about the girls.
The Pickup Artist guys were also out there to help out. I’ll be honest, Kosmo is the man. He would drag me into set after set and he was amazing. It was great to hear some of the same lines that I had just learned, used by him and see that they work and what reaction you will get with them. Greg, from season 2 was also an all-star in-field. He seemed to always know just when to join me in a 2 set to help me isolate, and he knew just how to do it also. I spent a little time with all of the guys, but Kosmo and Greg were the two that really took me under their wing.

I hate to admit but I didn’t see Discovery too much in-field. I would have liked to have seen him at work a bit more. What I did see looked amazing, he was always in set and seemed to always isolate quickly. When I did speak to him, he was very good about fine tuning what he had seen me do. So he was paying attention to me and saw me more than I saw him, because he was always spot on with the advice.

Like I said much earlier in this review. Mystery never stops teaching. On our way out of the clubs, he was breaking down a set he worked, or a set he saw us in, or what we can do next time to make a set work for us. He is a machine. A fountain of knowledge, and all you have to do is listen and pay attention and he will teach you.

Breakout Sessions:

This will be a quick one. The breakout sessions are like Grad school for college. I attended all of them and they fine tune what you ahve spent the pervious two days learning. It’s like specializing in each field. Each instructor has an area where they excell and this is the time for them to teach you how and why.
Matador said it best at the end of the bootcamp. “I’ve taught you everything I know. Now it’s your turn to go out there and apply it and make it yours.”

This was an experience that I will never forget and learned an immense amount from. I can garuntee that I will be practicing what they have taught us and will utilize it in all aspects of my life, not just for picking up women. I know this was a lengthy review and if you’ve read it this far, I thank you. Again, like MikeyVegas, I did this review as much for myself as I did for the readers. I built a bond with the other guys in the camp as well as the instructors. And I know this may be too detailed a post, so if it need be ammended by an administrator, then please feel free. I got my thought out and thats a huge step towards internalizing the material. Thanks everyone for everything, and if you were there, please let me know if this is similar to your experience, or different, because I want to know everything I missed.

Tags: Discovery, girl, lovedrop, matador, Mystery, venusian arts, women

Phone Game Part 6: If You Don’t Get Her On The Phone

August 28, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

8 Comments

This is part six of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

If you’ve messed up somewhere in your game (or sometimes even if you’ve run perfect game and there are other factors in her life that are interfering with things), it can sometimes be very hard to get your girl on the phone for the first couple of calls. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

I’ve seen a lot of talk in the past about never leaving a message and just calling back a little later. Some older community teachings also advocate using a blocked number or, if you think she’s screening your calls, calling her from another number/payphone/etc. I disagree with all of this because, personally, I think it’s really creepy.

Leaving A Voicemail

The way you leave a voicemail can sometimes make or break a set.

I personally like Mehow’s idea of leaving a message but keeping it short and sweet:

“Hey, it’s Kevin. You can call me back.”
“Hey, it’s Kevin. We’ll talk later.”

Keep it friendly and warm, but simple and clear. DON’T do this:

“Hey this is Brian, we met at ____. I was wearing that hat that you said made me look like Kid Rock. I really liked talking to you and wanted to see if we could get together sometime. Maybe I could buy you dinner? Call me back: my number is 555-1AFC. Again, that’s 555-1AFC. Hope to hear from you soon. Talk to you later. It’s Brian, by the way. Ok. Call me! Bye!”

That will NOT get you a date!

Assume she knows who you are (and she SHOULD if you built enough comfort before you got her number) and assume that she will call you back. If that’s your reality, and it’s compelling enough, it will happen.

If She Doesn’t Respond

If she does not respond to your texts or answer your calls, DO NOT keep texting or calling her. One of the creepiest things you can do when gaming your target is to continuously call or text her. Don’t even bother blocking your number either. If she’s already screening her calls, she will figure out pretty quickly that it’s just you calling from a blocked number, from a payphone, etc. Call her from your phone with your number once and leave a message.

I will rarely make a second call the same day if she doesn’t answer her phone or phone back. Same goes for texts: if she doesn’t respond to my first text of the day, I probably wont text her again that day unless I hear from her somehow. Also, because I usually only make one phone call until I hear from her, I will only ever leave one voicemail per day. If you’ve sent her a text and a phone call already that day and she still hasn’t talked to you, anything further than that can come off weird and stalkerish. Leave a voicemail on your first call of the day and then wait for her.

Anything more than this can be creepy and a MASSIVE turn-off.

Also, over the years I’ve seen a lot of guys (myself included, sadly) resend a previously sent text “just in case she didn’t get it”, thinking that even if she did get the first one, she will just assume the repeated text is just a duplicate (people texting from or to people in bad signal areas will sometimes get duplicate texts over and over again with some service providers). Unfortunately, most women know that you’re really just sending her the same message (emotionally needy girls do this A LOT), so do not do that either. You’re not being clever, you’re just doing what every other AFC does. If your phone says the text went through, assume that it went through. If she wanted to talk to you, she would text you back.

Again, I repeat:

DO NOT BE THAT CREEPY GUY THAT KEEPS CALLING, TEXTING, OR LEAVING MESSAGES. It astounds me how many men will fill a woman’s voicemail or send them dozens (that’s dozens PLURAL!) of texts per day if the woman doesn’t call them back. A woman doesn’t want a guy who is going to constantly hound her if she doesn’t contact him. She doesn’t want a guy who is going to “chase” her so much that it borders on stalking. She wants a guy that floats well below her comfort limits and lets her chase HIM.

If you don’t get her on the phone the first time you call her, wait a couple of days and repeat the pattern outlined in the previous posts. If you don’t hear from her again, wait a slightly longer amount of time and then try again. If you haven’t gotten a hold of her after two or three calls (maybe four, but sometimes that can be pushing it), it’s time to call it quits and go back to square one. But before giving up on the set entirely, you can try the Last Ditch Phone Message.

The Last-Ditch Phone Message

The Last Ditch Phone Message (I’m pretty sure I got this from Mystery, but I could be wrong) should be the last voicemail you leave for her if you haven’t been able to get her on the phone. You give her one last opportunity to take a chance and actually get to know you. It should go like this (I basically say the lines below verbatim):

Hey, it’s [Prophet]. You know what, let's just barrel through this. I know it's uncomfortable to meet new people. But let's just, you know, barrel through because this is important. This is how all our loved ones got into our lives, all the people we love and all our friends. Let's just get through the initial weirdness of meeting someone new and if we don't end up liking each other, at least we know we tried. So let's hang out. Ten minutes. Call me back.

Note that this is the Last Ditch Phone Message. If the girl hasn’t called you back so far, there is still a good chance she still wont, but this kind of call to action can sometimes save an otherwise failing set. Once gain, don’t sound creepy when you leave this message. Avoid sounding angry our disappointed, just be confident and upbeat. If you convey the right energy along with that message, it can turn things around from time to time.

DO NOT, I REPEAT: DO NOT sound pissed off that she hasn’t called you back. You should never sound upset that she hasn’t called. If she even detects that you are reacting to her lack of response on an emotional level she will unconsciously conclude that you are over-reactive and needy, and DEFINITELY wont call you then.

Next week: my final notes on Phone Etiquette.

About Prophet

Tags: game, girl, girls, message, phone, Prophet, women

Starting Your Day Out Right

July 7, 2009 by Wild Card
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

5 Comments

How many times have you woken up and just lounged around in bed for hours on end? How many times have you hit the snooze button about 50 times only to get up at the last second for whatever is you have to do? How many times have you shuffled your way into the kitchen, barely able to do communicate more than a groan as you fumble around with the coffee maker in a half-conscious daze? This is how most people start their mornings on any given day of the week: groggy, grumpy, and half-asleep. The way your start your morning influences the rest of your day. A person who starts his morning in a positive way typically has a positive day. If you walk into the office with a smile on your face and a spring in your step, your mood can be contagious and it can spread to the rest of the office, making the rest of your day a little better than it may have been otherwise. But if you spend more mornings than not staggering out of your room moaning and groaning your way to work in a way that resembles the staggerings and moanings of a b-movie zombie, then chances are your day will not be as enjoyable as it could be.

Look around at your coworkers next chance you get. Notice their hair, their clothing, their eyes, smiles, and their posture. Can you tell which ones just threw themselves together in the morning while they were still half-asleep? Do you look like one of those people? Does your hair look kind of messy? Are your eyes drooping? Are you smiling? Do your clothes look they were hastily thrown on because you barely had time to get ready? These traits are no good at all. If your friends and/or coworkers only ever see you dressed shabbily and looking groggy and ill-kept, you are not projecting the image that you are a successful, happy person who knows how to take care of himself (all of which are DHVs). Remember, the self-improvement that comes from being a Venusian Artist is not just limited to your behaviour in a nightclub or a bar, it needs to be evident in every aspect of your life or you will lack congruence in the field. Nobody wants to be labelled as the grumpy person, the lazy guy, the boring (translation: low-energy) guy. Everybody wants a fun happy label because that’s who you should be: fun, happy, loving and full of excitement. And if you can look good while you are doing it, then it just compounds those DHVs! A good start to your morning can really help make this happen.

So what does it take?

The first step is waking up. Set your alarm for a decent time that gives you an hour or two before work. Studies have show that as an adult your body needs about eight hours of sleep. But really, it’s mind over matter when it comes to this. If you’re having a regular day you can most likely get away with anywhere from five to seven hours. You can eventually train your body to do this every night. However, if you have a full day planned out for yourself you should play it safe and get the eight hours as that will ensure that you are rested and refreshed for the long day ahead.

A major problem for a lot of people with too much free time is oversleeping. The longer you stay in bed, the more relaxed you feel, and while this may be a good thing on a rainy Sunday morning, it can also trick your body into thinking that is more tired than it actually is, making it even harder to get out of bed. You should always try to avoid sleeping for more than 9 hours a night. Any more than that, and your body will start to think that it’s still tired and want to sleep even more. You can actually end up more exhausted by sleeping for 12-14 hours than by sleeping for 6-7 hours.

Avoid the snooze button at all costs. If you try to go back to sleep for more than 10-15 minutes after you have already woken up, your body will try to go back into it’s sleep cycle and want to sleep even longer than it would have otherwise. Put your alarm clock somewhere out of reach. Your best bet here is to stick it across the room. The point of this is pretty obvious: to get your ass up and out of bed and not just stick your arm out to smack the snooze button. If you’re a heavy sleeper, get a clock radio alarm and set it to a fuzzy station with the volume set to max to make sure you can’t just ignore it for a little while before getting up. If you want to even go that little extra you can jump online and buy an alarm clock that will run around the room until you chase it down to turn the damn thing off. Other tricks to getting up can include keeping your window open to allow the sunlight into your room in the morning; our bodies are powered by the sun… kind of like superman to a very small degree. If you’re a coffee drinker you can also try getting a coffee maker with a set timer on it and set it a minute or two after your alarm is set to go off and make sure to not put the pot in, this is a sure way to get your ass out of bed (assuming you don’t want a kitchen counter full of messy coffee).

Step two is setting your mood for the day. Do something productive such as cleaning your room, doing your laundry, writing in your blog, indulging in one of your hobbies or doing the dishes while listening to some high beat, high energy, and high volume music, or better yet, if you have the time in the mornings you can do all of the above. You can kill two birds with one stone here, if you’re cleaning then you are keeping your environment clean and maintained, if your blogging or catching up on a hobby then you are improving and expanding your mind. Once you start getting shit done it can really amp up your state and make you feel productive. Do your morning exercise routine (everybody should have one of these, it could be a jog, weights, yoga, just do something active!) then jump on into the shower. Get a shower radio or even sing to yourself, anything to amp your state up even more, the more good feeling in you the better. Once out of the shower put some nice clothes on, do up your hair and make yourself all nice and pretty. It’s very important to feel good about yourself. Hell, you can even go as far as telling yourself how good you look in the mirror. It may sound silly at first, but positive affirmations like this can really reinforce an energetic, confident state for the day. Finally, make sure that you eat. Your body is your vessel and it needs the nutrients necessary to get through the day so eat up and get the energy your body needs. Try to eat something healthy and avoid the fast-food breakfasts if you can.

Usually in the morning most of us have places to be such as work or school so for the most part this will all be condensed into anywhere from an hour to two hours, all depending on what time you need to leave the house. These are all suggestions for things you and (and should) be doing when you wake up. You will need to make a personal morning routine that fits your life.

On your way over to your destination you should be keeping your state at a high. You should be walking into the door of wherever you’re going with that same good feeling you built up all morning. For some of us it can take 5 minutes to get to where we are going, some may take up to an hour or so, either way I find that some good, up-beat music will help with that. In the car on your stereo or taking the shoe lace express with your ipod or mp3 player, if you have some good tunes pumping you up it will make the trip to your destination all the more enjoyable.

Note: coffee and energy drinks, while not the healthiest choice, can be excellent at giving you that extra boost to your energy levels in the morning. Just don’t go over board on the stuff because they can be addictive. I’m sure we’ve all seen someone we know acting all bitchy and moody because they haven’t had their morning coffee yet. You don’t want to be that guy.

All in all, these are simply guide lines on how to start your day in a positive way. Again, the way your start your day can have a major impact on the rest of it. The goal is to pump up your state and put you into the best mood you can be in for the day. Get up, be active, look good, and feel good about yourself before you even step foot out of the door to head to your destination. And don’t forget to wear your smile when you walk out that door!

About Wild Card

Wild Card is a seduction writer operating out of Toronto. Aside from his work for Venusian Arts, Wild Card is a card dealer and drummer in a classic rock/new rock band. In his spare time, he takes every opportunity he can to have crazy adventures with his wingmen, Showcase and Prophet.

Tags: dhv, excitement, fun, happy, self improvement, venusian artist

Phone Game Part 5: Your Voicemail Can Be Your Wingman

June 29, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

9 Comments

This is part five of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

Your voicemail greeting can provide a surprising amount of information about you. What you say, how you say it, and how long it takes you to say it can all DHV or DLV you. A good voicemail greeting can convey value, humour, preselection, create jealousy…the possibilities are only limited by your imagination. It’s like having a wingman secretary to take your calls when you’re not around! A lot of PUAs overlook the usefulness of their voicemail greeting, which is why it gets it’s very own article here. As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

Your voicemail greeting (the thing that says “I’m not here, leave a message, blah blah blah”) can be used to convey all sorts of things about yourself. If your avatar is something of the “cool, successful businessman” variety, then you can use it to create the impression that you are a very important person in a business sense (which usually implies that you have access to financial resources – a DHV). If you’re a sarcastic, fun, party-all-night kind of guy, then you can use it to convey a sense of fun or cleverness (both are DHVs). Or you can just use it to convey sexuality and preselection which, needless to say, are massive DHVs.

Here are some examples of possible voicemail greetings:

If you have business contacts calling you a lot on your cell, you are kind of stuck with only a few options. If you can get away with it without anyone asking any questions, make your greeting sound incredibly professional, as if you’re worth a million bucks. Make up a name and say something like:

“You’ve reached [insert full name here], I’m not available to take your call. If this is an emergency, please contact Samantha, she’ll know how to get a hold of me.”

And if anyone asks who Samantha is, you can always just say “Oh she’s someone that works with/for me. You won’t ever need to deal with her though.”

Something like this can convey a lot of value. If you are a person who has someone that people can contact to get a hold of you in an emergency (note that it is implied that the important people will already know her number), then you must be an important person. The implications of this fact can be a great subtle DHV.

If you don’t have to worry too much about your boss or clients calling your cell, you can really go crazy with it.

My old greeting used to say “Hey you’ve reached Kevin’s voicemail. Leave your name and measurements and I’ll get back to you.”

One of my wings has one that says “You got the voicemail. Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you. Leave me a sexy message and I’ll get back to you sooner.”

You would be surprised by some of the ridiculous messages we have each received. The trick here is NOT TO SOUND LIKE A DOUCHE. A buddy of mine has one that says “Hey you reached Chris. I either couldn’t make it to the phone or I didn’t want to talk to you. Figure it ouuuuutttt.” Now, if the delivery wasn’t just right on this (or any of the ones above, really) he would sound like quite a douchebag. But he has just the right amount of humor and silliness in his voice to make you laugh when you hear it, so it’s perfectly fine.

This is again a DHV because you are showing a good sense of humor while simultaneously conveying sexuality, and if nothing else, sets you apart from the average guy. If they laugh, you’ve got it right. If they leave you a sexy message, you’re doing it right. If they tell you they hate your voicemail, then you should seriously consider changing it (calibrate on whether she REALLY hates it, or if she’s just shit-testing you). If you get a voicemail from your target that says “You need to change that stupid voicemail thing” in a legitimately annoyed voice, you should probably take that advice.

Of course, the absolute best thing to do in my opinion is to get your wing-girl or a female friend with a sexy voice to record a greeting for you. My current greeting says:

“You’ve reached Kevin’s cell phone. He’s a little TIED UP at the moment *giggle giggle* leave a message and he’ll get back to you when he’s FREE.”

And because I love you guys, you can listen to it here (sorry about the quietness and low quality).

These are all just sample ideas that I’ve seen work in the real world very well, but you are by no means limited by them. Expirement! Try different things. Look for voicemail greetings online and either use them as they are or improve them and use your own version. Just as with any type of routine or gambit in the field, what you do is only limited by your imagination!

Regardless of what you use, try to keep is short and sweet. Nothing is more annoying than a greeting that goes on forever about nothing. Have you ever gotten someone’s voicemail and had to listen to them sing a song into your ear for several minutes before you could get to the beep? It’s frustrating and aggravating and most people will just hang up rather than wait. Similarly, I’ve seen some otherwise interesting people apparently just ramble into their phone for what feels like forever. I called a buddy of mine a while back and his voicemail went like this:

“Hey you’ve reached ____, I’m either not available or I’m asleep or my phone is off or something. You can leave a message but it would be better if you just called me back. If you do want to leave a message though, I check it pretty regularly, so I can get back to you. Anyway, leave your name and number and what the call is regarding and I’ll call you back.”

It was horrible! The only reason that – I – sat there and listened to the whole thing was because I just couldn’t believe that it was still going! But who else would really wait through all that just to leave a message? A high-value HB10 with dozen other guys to potentially call? Not likely! You want them to leave a voicemail, so you want to keep your greeting short and to the point.

Next week: how to handle things if you cant get her on the phone!

About Prophet

Tags: call, girls, phone, phone game, voicemail

Phone Game Part 4: Between Your First Call And Your Day 2

June 14, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

This is part four of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

Once you’ve built some comfort and had at least one conversation with her on the phone already, it’s time to set up your Day-2. Hopefully, you’ve already seeded a possible hangout when you #-closed her, or at least during your previous phone call(s) so all you have to do is invite her to something you are already doing.

The problem here is that different women have their own sets of social anxieties. Some women will have no problem showing up alone with you and all your friends for some chicken wings, others will only feel comfortable hanging out with your if they have a lot of their friends around, while others may only feel comfortable if it’s just the two of you hanging out together in a very public place.

The most effective approach to this is to give her two options to hanging out with you. My standard Day-2 line is (and I think I got this from Lovedrop): “We’re all doing our weekly wing-night on Wednesday, you should come along. Bring some friends if you want. Or, I’m going shopping on Thursday for a new shirt and you could come help me pick one out.” This way she can choose whichever option will be the most comfortable for her as well as the most convenient (she may actually be busy on one of those days). I say almost the exact same thing every time. I just change out the days and events as necessary.

If she says she wants to bring friends, let her know that it’s fine but make sure you bring some too. Girls and a wingman are ideal here. If you can, try to throw in something to insinuate that you are expecting her to bring her girlfriends, and not her orbiting guy friends (I made this mistake too many times back in the day and it really complicates things). But be prepared that she might bring a guy anyway.

You should also be prepared for her throwing out a counter-offer and suggesting that you do something with her and her friends. Do not take this as an IOD! It is more than likely just a means for preserving her own comfort levels. This will happen from time to time, and unless it’s a large event she wants you to come to, expect to just show up by yourself. And if it is a large event, don’t ask her if you can bring someone, just show up your wing or (preferably) wing-girl.

Just like when you #-closed her to begin with, talk to her a bit more for a few minutes once you set up the hang out and then get off the phone. You can call or text her if you feel it necessary during the days leading up to your day-2, but it is not required. Once again, calibrate it based on the amount of time between your hang-out and how interested she appears to be. You don’t want to be that guy that calls her every day before you hang out just to remind her of the fact that she is supposed to hang out with you (especially if, like me, you set your days-2’s up for within only a few days of your call). But at the same time, there may be occasions when you will need to call or text her at some point (like if there is an extended period in between the conversation and the future day-2). In some sets, if I feel like I need to keep her buying temperature up until we see each other I like to send silly little texts like the ones I listed in part 1. Or I’ll just send her a quick message to let her know about something funny or interesting that just happened.

Try to use your best judgment here. What you will need to do will vary from woman to woman and you’ll eventually just get a sense for it with practice.

When you reach the day of the day-2, you should definitely call her to finalize your plans. I personally never assume that an arrangement to meet up is set in stone simply because in this day and age plans can change instantly and without notice. I always call my target before the day-2, usually in the afternoon if our hang-out is in the evening. I try to keep this call short and sweet because I want more to talk about when we actually meet, but it’s usually best to talk for a minute or two about your respective days before bringing up the meet. As long as you don’t come off as if you are just using filler conversation to avoid bringing up the date (which will come off as insecure and needy), it will help you seem a little less eager to hang out with her. The conversation should have the same vibe that you would have with your friends if you called them up to talk about your plans for the evening.

Next week: how your voicemail can be your wingman when you’re not around!

About Prophet

Tags: game, girls, phone, Prophet, revelation, venusian arts, wingman, woman, women

The Benifits of Productivity

June 5, 2009 by Wild Card
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Before we get into this I want you to ask yourself the following:

How much do you usually get accomplished in a day?

How much COULD you get accomplished in a day?

Two very different questions and, in most cases, two very different answers. If you’re like 95% of the population of the western world, you probably understand on some level that you aren’t getting as much done in a day as you’d like. Most people complain that they are already too busy, or too tired, or just can’t find the motivation to get up and get things done. These are excuses. They allow a person to admit that they aren’t getting as much out of their day as they could without actually feeling bad about it. And most of the time, it’s usually because these excuse makers have become accustomed to being unproductive and simply cant be bothered to try to get more out of their day. Too many people spend far too much of their lives on the couch or in front of their computers where it’s safe and boring and familiar. If you are one of those people then this needs to change. If you don’t get off that couch, out the door and out of the house, not getting anything accomplished then your day is pretty much wasted. When you get into a bad habit such as this, only bad things will arise from it such as laziness and do nothingism (and yes, that’s actually a word). In life we all want to be successful, and success thrives from productivity, because when we get shit done were one step closer to reaching our goals in life. It can sometimes take quite a bit of self discipline to become productive; however, here are some very good tips to help you get started.

Try keeping a day planner, something to help you stay on top of things. Most phones today already have a day planner built into them; this makes it easier for those who have them to stay focused on daily/weekly tasks especially with sound alerts to remind you. When writing or programming tasks or events into your planner you should always make sure to put in everything that should be a part of your daily activities. This could be a scheduled hour to hour plan or even a check list of things to do with your day. Include your work out, your practice session for any instrument you play or hobby you take part in, take pride with what you do. Any material you need to read up on and any other such activities you like to indulge yourself in should also be done every day.

Cut down on pointless, mindless activities such video games, mindless web surfing, and television. These things can become very addictive and when indulging in them too much it can become very easy to waste your time. Instead, try reading, writing or even watching instructional videos. Just do anything to expand your mind. After all, knowledge is power! (Sorry, I had to). Now that’s not to say that you should completely cut those things out of your life, it’s always nice to zone out of reality and go into your own little world every once in a while. Just be moderate about these kinds of things and don’t ever get carried away with them.

GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! You should be doing this anyways. So go soak in some sun, get your errands done, get everything you’ve been putting off done. While your out of the house be sure to make every possible social interaction happen. The more shit you get done for yourself the better you feel about yourself, the better you feel about yourself the more confident you become in yourself. Confidence is key when it comes to your game, with it you can pull off whatever you think you can because you will project it with the vibe you’re giving out. It’s actually quite amazing what a sense of accomplishment can do for your confidence.

The trick here is not to make productivity a chore. It’s so easy to just be lazy say “nah…I just don’t feeling like doing that today.” But this isn’t really helping anything, now is it? You should never feel like you are doing a task or errand against your will. You need to approach these sorts of things from a positive mindset. You should want to get X done, Y sent, and Z put away. You need to feel good about it. At the end of the day you should get into the habit of patting yourself on the back for getting as much done as you did. If you approach your daily tasks from this perspective, you’ll inevitably catch yourself saying “Man, I cant believe how much I got done today!” because you feel so good about it. Even if all you did was run around and do a bunch of tiny errands or worked all day on finishing one big project, you will actually feel better about yourself simply because you were productive, and that can really help your state in the field. Moreover, feeling good about accomplishing something will actually positively reinforce your desire to be productive in the first place, making productivity rather addictive if you approach it with that kind of mindset. So the more productive you are, the more you will find yourself WANTING to be even more productive.

All you have to do is stop yourself from being lazy and this sense of accomplishment will perpetuate itself for as long as you’ll let it.

But although it feels good to get things done, there’s more to this than just feeling good about being productive. You are now taking action in your life. You are getting things done and getting shit handled. If you’ve set some goals for yourself, then every completed task and finished errand gets you closer to those goals, even if only indirectly. Any progress in your life will bring you closer to your life’s goals and dreams. The more you work at things the better you get at them. So don’t be a waster of time, be productive, get shit done and you will be seeing results in yourself in no time at all. Most of all, remember to keep smiling.

About Wild Card

Tags: confidence, plan, planning, productivity, progress, success, tasks

Unbreakable

June 2, 2009 by Knack
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

4 Comments

Unbreakable

When I teach pick up, I prefer to do it over months. This allows me time to get to know the student and really get in their heads and know everything I can. The additional time also allows me to use some unorthodox tactics in teaching people. One of the things I do is make the students watch particular movies and tell me what the pickup lesson was to the movie. I never tell people what they are supposed to be looking for or learning, I make them tell me after the fact. Often they don’t get the point, unless the point is a hardcore sticking point for them and smacking them in the face.

One of the movies that I use is the M. Night Shyamalan movie “Unbreakable”. Most people consider his pinnacle of work to be “The Sixth Sense”. I respectfully disagree. The movie opens with David Dunn (played by Bruce Willis) who has extraordinary abilities that he is unaware of, and is living a very mundane life. His life is in shambles: His kid doesn’t respect him, his wife and he are on the rocks, and he is in a dead end job. At one point, David describes his empty life as “waking up every morning with a great sadness.”

Elijah Price (played by Samuel L. Jackson) believes that he has found the purpose of David. He was meant to save other people as a super hero. David is of course initially resistant and unbelieving in his own abilities (ie. Shitty Inner Game). Elijah spends most of the moving getting David to believe in himself and to realize his purpose. When David finally does accept his path and begins doing what he was meant to do, his life becomes much better. When asked about his sadness in the mornings, he says that it has gone.

There are a lot of movies that show a character going through changes and discovering their purposes. This one for me is so powerful because it describes EXACTLY how I used to feel when I was married and working in a chemical plant. Every morning I woke up miserable. I hated my job and everything about it. Every day was a struggle to go to work. In the beginning this sadness just came in a small dose of longing for something else that I was never able to describe. Eventually toward the end I had to talk myself every day out of calling into work sick or taking a vacation day. The one thing that made me continue on was my love for my then wife. Oh I hid it well, but inside but inside I was dying.

Then something happened that changed everything: I got laid off. Like most people, at the time I defined myself by what I did for a living. It was who I was and I considered it my purpose. The problem was, it really wasn’t my purpose and I hated it (and by proxy my life). When the employees were told of the layoffs, I was mired in self pity for a brief time. Eventually one of the employees told me while I was whoa is me-ing “Go be a teacher. You come in here every day telling us useless shit that none of us here care about. Go tell some kids. They probably won’t care either, but at least they will take notes.” Initially I felt insulted. I often felt out of place at work, but I didn’t like it being thrown in my face. The fact was I was very out of place. I was not content just to go to work and survive and be contained in a little bubble. My soul wanted more. My co-workers were different.

I took my co-worker’s advice and did indeed become a teacher (although I needed far more than just his advice to actually do that. I’ll tell those stories another time though). Once I was on the path to being a teacher an interesting thing happened: No more morning sadness. Because I found my purpose, like David Dunn, I am unbreakable. You can be as well when you find your place in the world. Before even attempting to find a woman, you should first find yourself.

—-Knack

About Knack

Knack is a VA Coach and a world traveler. Knack is an elementary school teacher, and uses his background as a professional educator to take a student specific approach to teaching pick up. He has picked up various languages throughout his journeys and travels to three or four new countries per year in his quest to experience various cultures.

Tags: Arts, game, inner game, Knack, pick-up, Unbreakable, Venusian, woman

More on Opening

May 25, 2009 by Hawaii
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

About Hawaii

Hawaii is a VA Coach operating out of Las Vegas. He has instructed at nearly fifty (50) live bootcamps and seminars and trained hundreds of students over 3 years working for Mystery. He traveled with Mystery and Matador for more than a year and taught at over 25 bootcamps as an approach coach during his training period before becoming a lead instructor at over a dozen bootcamps. Not the typical player, Hawaii is a short, skinny, 30-something, average looking Asian guy, former accountant, who transformed himself into someone who is successful with women after years of practice working thousands of sets. Hawaii is Mystery's former Personal Assistant and has been working with him for 3 years since August 2005. In addition, Hawaii trained all of the students on season 2 of VH-1's The Pickup Artist as an off-camera Instructor for the entire duration of filming.

Tags: game, hawaii, open, opener, opening

Phone Game Part 3: If She Calls You

May 18, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

5 Comments

This is part three of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

If your game is tight, and you follow the guidelines I outlined in my previous articles on texting and calling the women you meet, you’ll find that a surprising number of them will call you faster than you may have previously thought (make sure you TRADE numbers when you close her). As with my previous articles, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

If she calls you, there are a number things to be mindful of such as your current circumstances, at what stage you are in the set, and what you think will work best with her.

First, make sure you don’t pick up on the first ring. The right time to answer is on the third ring. This can be hard to gauge if you have custom ringtones and such on your cell (and who doesn’t these days), so just wait a few seconds before you answer. I personally like to sing aloud with whatever ringtone I have assigned to the woman in question for a few lines because it ups my energy level when I answer the phone. It sounds silly, but no matter what else is happening, it always means that I answer the phone with energy.

When I answer the phone I typically just answer it with an enthusiastic and warm “Hello!”, or by calling her by her nickname: “Hello darlin’, how’s my Attack Kitten today?”. Depending on your identity, you may want to answer the phone with something different. If we already have inside jokes, I’ll sometimes answer the phone with a reference to that (so I would literally pick up the phone and say something like “I just swam here from FUCKING Pittsburg!”). My wing Wild Card, who has a very flamboyant and zany personality will always answer with “You’ve got GREG!” while a more professional person might answer with a professional “Brian Richards speaking”, as if they are expecting one of their million dollar clients to be calling them. This all depends on your avatar and personality. Just don’t make it sound corny or childish if that kind of humor isn’t part of your game.

Another thing that I think a lot of people don’t consider is how enthusiastic you sound when people call you. When your friends and girlfriends call you, its good social vibing to sound enthused that they called. Have you ever called up one of your buddies and had him sound almost annoyed that you called him? This is bad vibing. You’re calling up your friend to chat or invite him out, and not only isn’t he glad to hear from his so-called friend, but he actually sounds annoyed that you called! And he may not even realize that he’s being like this. He really could be happy to hear from you, but he’s just not showing it in his voice. There’s no energy, no inflection, no enthusiasm. You need those things when you answer the phone regardless of it’s your target, your wingman, or even your mom.

If your target calls you, it is an IOI. If you don’t accept that IOI and she gets a negative vibe from you, you will be reinforcing the idea that you don’t want her to call you. Now, I don’t know about you guys, but I want my targets to call me. I want them to send me funny little texts and call me to shoot the shit and invite me to hang out. Hell, I want them to call me when I’m out with other girls so I can build some jealousy. It makes your job a hell of a lot easier when they call you, so make sure you are happy to hear from them when they do!

Note: that doesn’t mean act supplicative and needy when she calls you. Don’t be like “OMG I’m so glad you called, I was just thinking about you last night and it’s really good to hear from you…” Instead, sound like “Hey babe! How are you? … Awesome! I’m fabulous as usual! I’m heading over to meet my friend Kayla, we’re going shopping to find me a top hat! What have you been up to?”

Now, once you answer you have the option, depending on what you are personally doing at the moment and what you think she would respond most positively to, to get involved in a conversation or to simply say “I’m kind of in the middle of something at the moment. How about I call you back [in an hour/this afternoon/tomorrow/whatever]?”

For instance, if I’m with a bunch of friends and we’re all hanging out and having fun, I’m not going to stop what I’m doing to talk on the phone. I’m going to say “Hey, how’s it going? Awesome! Listen, I’m out with some friends at the moment. How about I call you when I get home?” Or if she just has something quick to say, I’ll tell her “Ok, but I can’t talk long my friends are waiting on me.” This can be a very powerful thing to do every now and then because it conveys non-neediness and shows that you are a social person.

Alternatively, you don’t even necessarily HAVE to answer at all. If you are genuinely busy with something/someone, or you really just don’t feel like talking, don’t pick up and call her back later.

If you miss her call or just decide not to pick up, be sure to wait a little bit before you call her back. Unless you are both in a rush for some reason, ten minutes should be the minimum, but you could realistically wait for hours or days depending on the situation. Once again, you have to calibrate based on the situation.

If, for whatever reason, she doesn’t get you on the phone, you should make sure she has the option of leaving you a voicemail. This way you can check it whenever is most convenient for you and decide when you should call her back. You voicemail can also be very useful way to convey a little more of your personality. We’ll cover that in a couple weeks!

Next week: how to handle the time between your first call and you day-2!

About Prophet

Tags: bar, club, girls, phone, phone game

Kino Compliance: The 3 Rs

May 13, 2009 by Simeon
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

I was observing a natural work a set the other day when I came upon an epiphany in terms of how kino works in its progression. I realized the term “escalation” did not properly encompass the whole process of what happens when kino occurs during a pickup scenario. I sat down and mapped it out and came up with what I think is a better way of describing how kino helps in building attraction. I was able to break it down in three overlapping steps similar to how attraction, comfort and seduction overlap thus does kino compliance. These three steps I have dubbed the “3 Rs” which are Receptiveness, Response, and Reciprocation, respectively.

In the beginning stages of kino escalating, gauging the indicators of interest (IOIs) is crucial in continuing kino and further ramping it up. In the first few minutes, kino should either step up gradually with slow attraction building (or rapidly if kino plowing targets with high body temp already) or should cycle up and down according to IOIs and IODs. The receptiveness of the kino will be indicated by direct body language and facial expressions. When a target smiles during kino this will be an indication of continued receptiveness. However, confused looks or expressions of distaste to any kind of touching should be calibrated with kino IODs. The receptiveness should be focused upon until major positive physical response mechanisms are present.

Once receptiveness is indicated the target or set should begin to respond favorably. In addition to body language, the kino should cause the target to begin to touch her hair, scratch herself, lean into you or other IOI responses that indicate that kino is being received favorably. This is where overlap occurs in that these responses are a physical phenomenon one can observe, but yet will overlap the receptive behavior. When referring to responses I generally am noting larger physical motions that are easily observed and congruent with the receptive indicators already mentioned. Responses can be negative, however. If receptiveness is plowed through and comfort is not established kino can still be met with a response such as turning away or backing up from unwanted kino. Therefore any ambiguous or negative response should be met with caution that includes building more attraction and cycling through less aggressive with more aggressive kino till positive responses occur.

After major positive responses, the last stage in the kino compliance cycle should occur. This involves reciprocation. Not only should a target respond with IOIs from your kino but they should begin to kino back too. Once this occurs it is a green light towards more intense kino that loops back through the 3 Rs. If, for example, you touch a woman’s hips and she touches yours this indicates you should now test for receptiveness towards more aggressive kino when the proper time calls for it (kiss closing in a seduction location is a great example of this cycling process). Once reciprocation occurs, the last level of kino should be a baseline for continuing to cycle kino and escalate again. The 3Rs should once again be favorable before advancing kino even further.

I feel this is a much more representative description of kino escalation then the term itself provides. Kino compliance with 3R cycling should yield positive results when practiced properly.

Have fun and keep Sarging.

Simeon

About Simeon

Simeon is a VA Coachoperating out of California. After winning the title of Master Pick-Up Artist on Season 2 of VH1?s The Pick-Up Artist, Simeon has chosen to further his training with Mystery and Matador as he continues the everlasting journey of improvements in the pickup arts. Now he has chosen to give value to others by teaching the arts that have so dramatically transformed his life so that others may share in the enjoyment that pickup creates through the rigorous but rewarding journey of pickup artist training provides.

Tags: artist, attraction, escalation, ioi, kino, pick-up, simeon, touch, woman, women

Phone Game Part 2: While On The Phone

May 8, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

This is part two of my series on phone game. Click here to view my previous articles.

The hardest part of phone game is getting her on the phone (see my previous article on that). Once you’ve gotten past that hurdle, things can move pretty smoothly if you’re smart and adaptable. As with my previous article, everything mentioned below is a guideline only. These rules are not set in stone! You have to adapt and calibrate your actions as you go.

The most important factor here is your voice. You should sound confident and self-assured in your tone. You should speak slowly, deeply, and with pausing, just as you would in the field. Sounding as cool as you did in the field when you met her while your on the phone is a commonly ignored concept in this field, but it is absolutely vital. Too many aspiring pick-up artists can run fantastic game in the field, but snap right back to their old selves on the phone and become needy, supplicative, and sometimes downright creepy. She can never sense any inconsistencies in your personality on the phone. This is key.

Once you’ve got her on the phone, you have to think of a phone call as sort of a mini pick-up. You start with a quick DHV, qualify her briefly, and then build comfort. I like to immediately tell her about something funny/crazy/interesting that happened later on in the night after my friends and I left the club that we met at but you could use any routine you want as long as it seems relevant to the phone call somehow (i.e. starting the routine with “So I just go this text from my friend and…”). When it’s time to qualify, try to qualify her based on something that has come up in the conversation that the routine has started if you can. Just saying “So….can you cook?” out of nowhere sounds kind of weird.

Here’s a generic example:

“So get this: as we were leaving the club on Friday, my friend Adam was getting literally DRAGGED away by this…not so attractive girl, but Adam is a REALLY nice guy and just couldn’t figure out how to get away from her without hurting her feelings. So Jamie (you met her, she was the blond in the corset) just trots right over and starts to pull Adam back to us, saying he’s gotta come home with us tonight. Well the other girl just LOOSES IT and starts freaking out on Jamie. She gets all in her face and starts trying to shove her and get physical. Now normally I’d be all like “Yeah catfight!” But that’s only when it’s people I don’t know, and Jamie doesn’t take shit from ANYBODY so we all rushed in and literally drag Jamie out of there before things got really out of hand. That’s why I love my friends though: everyone’s always watching out for each other, no matter what. From what I gathered though your friends are like that too, am I right?”

From there, you build comfort as normal. You let the conversation flow normally as you both get to know each other better. Just have a conversation. This is something so many PUAs just cant seem to get into their heads and I cannot stress this enough. Whether its ten minutes or two hours, your target should hang up the phone want to immediately call her friends and tell her about this phone conversation she had with this amazing guy who she really connected with. Talk to her, get to know her and above all, appreciate her.

I like to use the phone as an opportunity to talk about what’s going on in my life at the moment. It’s almost as if I’m catching up with an old friend and by creating that vibe, it creates the unconscious illusion of familiarity. See more about the art of conversation in my article about How To talk to girls

You don’t even have to set up the Day-2 on the first call. In fact, unless she brings it up, you probably should wait until at least the second phone call. If you want, you can seed a potential hang-out during your conversation (I would, for instance, mention something about my friends and I all getting together for our weekly wing-night, or maybe that we’re all going to a certain event on such an such a day) and then just not invite her to it until your next call. By not immediately going for the date the first time you talk to her, you convey non-neediness, and may even just leave her thinking “Why DIDN’T he ask me out after we had that great conversation?” Anticipation is a very powerful thing. Use it to your advantage whenever you can.

After your first call, wait two days or so and follow the same pattern above. If she seems really eager to hear from you again, you can call her the very next day if you want, and if the phone call didn’t go as perfectly as you had planned, maybe wait and call her on the third day. Again, it’s all about calibration here. You have to gauge how much value/compliance/comfort you have when deciding on what move to make next.

Next week: how to handle a call from her the proper way!

About Prophet

Tags: bar, club, girls, phone, phone game

The Importance of Speech

May 8, 2009 by Wild Card
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

Your delivery - the way you speak - can be one of the most important factors of your game. Like body language, you express more about yourself with the way you speak than with what you actually say. If your delivery is off you can be giving a very different message than you are really intending to.

First off, how fast are you talking? People who tend to talk faster show less value. Studies show that the faster you talk the more nervous you are. It stems from an unconscious fear that people are not going to listen to you long enough for you to say everything that you want. By talking fast, you convey that fear, which is a very bad sign of insecurity and gives you lower value. So make sure you are slowing down your speech and enunciating everything you say so that everyone in your set can hear your every word very clearly. Speak slower than you think you should be with pauses to draw more attention to your words. Be clear and concise. Pack more value into fewer words.

Secondly; you’re most likely in a crowded venue, so how loud are you speaking? Are you yelling, or are you speaking articulately and clearly with a deep, powerful voice that comes from your diaphragm? You’d better make sure it’s that second one. There is a fine, but notable difference between yelling and speaking loudly. Yelling will only give lower value because it conveys that you are trying to hard to get the group to hear you. And while you’re shouting at the top of your lungs, the guy next to you is speaking firmly and with enough tone for everyone to hear, thus giving him not only more value but he will also look like he is more comfortable in his set for double points. Also, if you are simply speaking loudly, it is also easier to avoid pecking (we unconsciously tend to peck when we have to yell in someone’s ear) and make you look more relaxed in set.

Thirdly; take the time to take a break from talking and just listen. This can open your mind to many new things. Mostly when in set you plough through and don’t really take the time listen to your target or anyone else in your set for that matter. By just listening (actually listening, not planning your next move) every once and awhile you can demonstrate that you are for real and not just some player and gives off just the right vibe. Try it.

You should also be looking at how confident of a speaker you are being. The higher your confidence the higher your value so be sure to project yourself clearly with the proper facial expressions and enthusiasm. A good way to sound more confident with your speech is making your tone go down at the end of a sentence instead of up. By raising your voice at the end of a sentence, you make it sound like a question. By lowering it, you will sound certain about what you are saying. If you pay attention to the way particularly interesting speakers raise and lower their voice, you will notice all sorts of things like this. Also, you need to sound interesting. Lovedrop talks about this a LOT in Revelations, but we’ll mention it here anyway. Sounding interesting doesn’t mean talking about interesting things, it means that you need be interesting. Be fascinated with what you are saying, speak with passion and enthusiasm. Speak slowly and with intermittent pausing (see Revelations for more on this). This will draw your audience into what you are saying as they start to hang on your every word. Moods are contagious. If you sound like you are really, truly interested in what you are saying, and you are saying it in a compelling manner, the people you are talking to will suddenly find themselves as interested in what you are talking about as much as you are.

Finally let’s look at your manners. Always make sure your playing nice with others just like your mother always taught you. Avoid rude behavior because it will only send a wake of bad emotions through everyone you encounter and that can only end with everyone seeing you as the asshole or douche bag. That doesn’t mean that you cant be cocky or tease your girls, by any means however. Just make sure you know the line between being a tease and being an asshole. People will not feel pleasant being around you if you are the latter and that is not what you are looking to do. A real alpha male doesn’t need to put down others to look cool. He just has fun for the sake of being fun and bringing good feelings to the group. Do your best to put some basic manners and politeness into every little interaction you encounter. You’re looking to be the guy everyone loves not the asshole everyone avoids, so smile and throw in a thank you every once in a while.

Always pay attention to yourself in the field and try to notice every factor that makes up your speech. Everything from pacing, to volume, to tonality conveys something about you. If you notice something is wrong or out of place, fix it, adjust it, or get rid of it. We make mistakes to learn from them so don’t ever be hard on yourself, simply know yourself, recognize that you need to change something, and work out how you can improve. A wing can be invaluable in this aspect, as he will always have a better idea of what you actually sound like in the field than you do. It is always good for you and your wing no notice each other and be critical with one another in a constructive way. An outside opinion about yourself from a fellow PUA can help you pin point certain flaws you may not have noticed yourself. Always remember to move forward and always improve. Remember: practice makes perfect.

About Wild Card

Tags: card, confidence, listening, mannars, pecking, speech, tone, wild

Women Are Like Cats Part 1

May 7, 2009 by Rizen
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Women Are Like Cats Part 1

Opening How do you approach a woman?

When you first meet a new cat, it’s usually startled when you first approach. It may not necessarily take flight but it will take precautions until it feel’s your not a predator with any type of agenda. Until the cat gets more familiar with whom you are and the scent you carry; you must believe that you are approaching with no intentions to “picking up the cat.” Notice that usually when you try to move around with the cat after first meeting it, it tends to want to disperse away. Well the same result would occur with a woman due to the high level of compliance you’re asking while she has little data and not enough comfort with you. Just like how you can tell the current emotional state/mood of a cat by the angle of its ears, you can tell about a woman by her current emotional state and conversation she gives you which are feedback you can acknowledge to know what input you’re receiving, therefore making it easy to communicate with her because you understand where she is in that moment.

Is it an indication of disinterest, demonstration of lower value, compliance test, indication of interest, or a demonstration of higher value? None the less the more time you spend in field then the more calibrated and awareness you will have of your environment, particularly social settings. In other words you will always know of what’s REALLY going on while others think they do. (People with really advanced game know what I mean. So remember when a movement is implemented it should be calibrated, smooth, confident, playful, and accurate. At the same time have that belief of being internally strong with no regrets or reasons why you as a man can’t step up if something caught your curiosity. However, don’t put yourself in a situation where you become that guy, “I must pet this cat.” Then you will notice your possibilities slimming down especially when you feel she’s got potential From there if you continue to game in the wrong direction you got yourself a restraining order. So how would you approach a cat? That’s how you approach a woman.

-Rizen

About Rizen

Rizen is a VA Coach living in Los Angeles. Aside from that he is a current college student in the process of majoring in public relations, a recording hip hop artist who’s secretive about his works for confidentiality agreements, a global traveler who not only has a diverse background or speaks fluent English and Arabic knowing Arabic in seven different dialects. In addition, travels frequently through out the year around the world enhancing both himself and his crafts to better reach his preference of taste, in what he considers an amplified set of skill sets.

Tags: approach, beliefs, cats, dating, game, opening, rizzen, value, women

Jealousy: Learning to Control It

April 21, 2009 by Wild Card
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Jealousy, what is it exactly?

A lot of people make it seem like such a negative feeling. From this impression, most of the time people feel that they have to resort to violence or anger. But this does not necessarily have to be the case.

“Jealousy leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side” - Yoda.

Jealousy is something triggered off in our minds to send us a message. It’s trying to tell us that we are attracted and in some way emotionally invested with a member of the opposite sex. A woman, for instance, first knows she’s attracted when she becomes jealous. This hard-wired emotion is built to protect what we want for ourselves and to help motivate us to go get the very thing in which we are jealous for. Some say this is a problem, but where there is a problem, there is always an opportunity for growth.

Despite the temptation to do so in the field, don’t let this emotion take you over. Instead we use it to your advantage: mostly with the hotties in the bar that you want to have attracted to you, but for anything really. And that’s where the jealousy plotline comes in, why it works, and how it can become very useful to you. Now I’m not about to get into all the different ways you can do this i.e. using a pivot, displaying major DHV that a female can relate to etc - that’s all covered in Revelations (you HAVE bought that by now, haven’t you?) This article is mainly here to inform you on how to identify jealousy within yourself, within others and how to deal with it from there.

Now we all know what jealousy is. However, most people seem to believe we always act on the facts presented to us. WRONG! If that were the case then you’d be able to go to the bar tonight and never have to worry about loosing your cool to a feeling of jealousy. But this is not the case. Chances are that you act on it as an emotion and thrash out just like a jealous person would next time it comes around. As a PUA you should know that you should always be aware of your emotions. So the next time something happens to you while you’re out in the field, on a day two, or even in a relationship you need to identify the fact that you are feeling jealous and decide to deal with things rationally.

Now what? Well, what’s the situation? Jealousy is usually triggered in the field by a member of the same sex imposing on your set. You need to calm down and deal with it RIGHT NOW. Don’t over react in these situations like a typical jealous person would. Jealousy will only get you the opposite of what you want. So what does that mean? It means stop being a little bitch and take control of the situation. Acting distant or moody or getting snappy with people isn’t going to help you. Starting an argument or making your target feel bad for talking to another guy is certainly not going to help you. You are only feeling jealous because you don’t feel in control, or you are feeling insecure about what is happening and don’t know what to do. As such you will act in a very reactive manner and the results of this are usually poor. Re-evaluate the situation and take control; is it another dude hitting up your girl? Act intelligently and unreactively and everything you’ve learned about dealing with these guys will give you a clear idea of how to deal with him. AMOG the guy and lower his value, go off and open a nearby set, spike the target’s buying temperature and make the OTHER GUY jealous. There is no need to feel jealousy yourself, but there is plenty of need to make other people feel it.

After analyzing the effects jealousy can have on us and how much it can change a social scene, don’t you think it can have the same effect on others? Of course it can, except the only difference is that the people you’re going to be pushing it on don’t know how to deal with it. They will act in the way every other jealous person out there does and if you can do it properly it will almost always work out in your favor. Make a man jealous and he is going to react in ways that’s only going to make you a heck of a lot cooler. Make a girl jealous and you’re only going to make her more attracted to you.

So always keep your cool, analyze any situation you’re in and NEVER let your emotions take a hold of you. You’re a pick up artist, you’re one cool guy. Take hold of any social scene you’re in and play your game to its best. And remember to always keep your smile on you at all times.

About Wild Card

Tags: attraction, control, emotions, girls, jealousy, love, plotline

Using Facebook

April 21, 2009 by Simeon
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

As most of you already know Facebook has taken over in terms of social interaction of the younger generation. Facebook is great for many reasons. Here?s a few of them you can use to your advantage:

-Show high value in notes
-Demonstrate pre-selection
-Create time bridges

There are also many more ways. When you number or e-mail close a new target, I recommend always asking if they are on Facebook and if they are immediately add them. Your response rate will be higher than text messages and significantly higher than calling. It’s also a great way of building your social circle as you can use the event invitation function to your advantage by attending events as well as recruiting people to your own event. Facebook is the greatest tool online in terms of building comfort. When you close a new target I recommend leaving wall posts once every day or two until the next meeting, and demonstrate value in every message to them. Build conspiracy by sending little cocky, funny messages privately to them, and increase your communication. Also, if you have mutual friends go to the mutual friends page and leave comments about your recent target. Staying active in Facebook will dramatically improve your odds in social circle game and also is a great asset in establishing day twos and preventing flakes.

Recommendations:

-Post messages on walls of the highest value women you know in order to entice reciprocal comments. This will show pre-selection to those just getting to know you.

-Blog about the exciting things happening in your life. If you are going bungee jumping tell the world about it because many interest activities make an interesting human being.

-Create events and invite Facebook friends on a frequent basis. This will demonstrate leadership on your part and will increase your value to targets.

-Send personalized messages to targets at least once a week and definitely on holidays. One PUA I talked to sent messages for five years to an out of town target till she finally came out to visit. There is a difference between neediness and persistent thoughtful commenting. Doing the latter yields results.

Good luck and happy sarging!

Simeon

About Simeon

Tags: advice, book, date, email, face, facebook, game, internet, online, simeon

Hawaii on Opening

April 21, 2009 by Hawaii
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

I have opened more sets than I can count but my best estimate is around 10,000 cold approach sets. When I first moved to Vegas over 4 years ago, I went out 7 days a week for at least 4 hours a day and just opened constantly. There are endless sets in Vegas so someone could easily open over a 100 sets a day in only a few short hours. The sets are not just in the clubs here, but literally everywhere on the Strip.

When I first started in the game I used the David Bowie opener, and the 80s song opener. I used these openers so many times that girls called me out on it weeks later. One time Mystery and I were walking through Treasure Island several years ago and a girl walked by me, pointed at me and said, ?Hey, it?s the David Bowie guy!? I had no idea who she was but she certainly recognized me from the opener that I had run on several hundred sets.

I stopped using opinion type openers after a while because I realized that they were too long and the set would take too long to give their opinion. I was in fact ?milking? the opener. You should never milk your opener. Most new guys spend too much time on the opener and sometimes don?t even get into A2; they get blown out on the opener because it is too long, boring, etc. I never get blown out anymore on the opener because the openers I use are so short and I transition directly into A2 right after the opener without hesitating. The only purpose of the opener is to open the set so you can transition into A2. I soon found that the best openers are the shortest.

The most important thing when opening is your body language, tonality and facial expressions. It is best to open over the shoulder when possible. You should smile before you open and say anything, then once you start talking, don?t smile too much because it is too try hard. You should use a warm, friendly tone while body rocking in and out to which is a nonverbal false time constraint. This gives the appearance that you are leaving and not staying long. This nonverbal false time constraint can be coupled with a verbal false time constraint such as ?I can only stay for a second, I have my friends here.?

When opening, it is much more important how you say something that what you actually say. So many guys get caught up in and stuck on the opener. If you are looking for the perfect opener there isn?t one. Sometimes now I will just say in Mystery?s tonality ?Hello, Hello? as my opener. That?s it, and then I will transition directly into A2. I will talk a lot more about opening in future articles. If you have any specific questions on opening or inquires about training email me at Hawaii@venusianarts.com or call me at 702-286-7785

Hawaii

About Hawaii

Tags: dating, game, girls, indirect, opener, opening, opinion, tips

Knack’s Theory on Teaching Pickup

April 18, 2009 by Knack
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Knack’s Theory on Teaching Pickup

Those of you that have had the opportunity to work with me know that I favor an approach to pickup that emphasizes a person?s natural abilities, talents, and personalities. I do this for many reasons, not the least of which is that many people that are learning pick up are not ?broken?. They do NOT need to be ?fixed?. There are people that will try to tell you that who you are as a human being is fundamentally wrong, severely flawed, or hopelessly crippled. I think this is a disservice, not only to the student, but to all of humanity. People all have amazing gifts and an inner radiance that people want to get to know, and will make the lives of people around them more luminous for their having passed through it. However, many people do not know how to display themselves to others in a way that is appealing and attractive. This is the epitome, the true apex of what pickup should become in your life. Pickup is an outlet not to randomly have sex with women, but to display to everyone around you both the wonder of the human being you are, and the human being that you have the POTENTIAL to become.

When I was working behind the scenes with the contestants of ?The Pickup Artist 2?, I recognized that many of the contestants had incredible potential. Rian recently told me when he was visiting me in DC ?I liked who I was. I always knew I was a great guy. The problem was that no one else recognized it. So either I wasn?t a good person, or I wasn?t making who I was clear to people.? Rian summed my view on matters pretty well. Someone like him doesn?t need to be scrapped and torn down. They only need to be tweaked. However, there is an exception to this general rule: the person that doesn?t like who they are (for whatever reason). This type is fundamentally broken and actually does need to be fixed. This type of person can be either a butterfly, or a train wreck. At any rate, it requires a great deal more work and effort in order to change this person into a pickup machine. That is because not only do that have to learn the same skills everyone else does, but they have the added problem of changing their lives. You first have to start with what the person wants to become, and then build a plan of action for the transformation. It is usually a painful and long process, but with guidance and perseverance, it can be achieved.

Those that are not willing to work hard, accept guidance, and metamorphosize into what they want to become, will crash and burn, and it isn?t pretty to watch. In the end, with the right teacher and a strong will, anyone can improve their lives and attract women. It is in those moments of acceptance of an extended hand that we achieve greatness, and when we are great, women follow. Once, the greatest minds extended their hands to me: John Gray (Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus), Sean Messenger, Mehow, Mystery, Matador, Lovedrop, and Hawaii. It is my pleasure, duty, and privilege to be able to teach attraction, seduction, and relationship skills to men, and extend to you the same hand of brotherhood that years ago was extended to me. It is I, which thank all of you for making that honor possible.

—-Knack

About Knack

Tags: dating, pickup, success, teaching, the game, tips

Phone Game Part 1: Making the First Call

April 14, 2009 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, Featured Articles

Time on the phone counts towards your seven hours, which means that practicing your phone game is an absolute must. Stop thinking of the phone as a tool for setting up a date, and instead look at it as a tool for building comfort

- Lovedrop, Revelations

Unless you’re only ever making Same-Night-Pulls (and if you are, you are probably shooting yourself in the foot in a lot of other sets), Phone Game can be a crucial part of your game and can be a major sticking point for a lot of Venusian Artists. Anyone who hasn’t got this down yet in their game should make a conscious effort to try to #-close every single set the open. Get as many numbers as you can to practice on, no matter how short or bad your time in the set may have been. The more phone calls you make, the better your phone game will get. Hell, even calling a number that you are certain is a fake or will not respond is still practice and will help you start to feel more comfortable on the phone.

So to help you out, I’ve put together everything I’ve learned about phone game over my years in the field, as well as from other sources like Mehow, TD, Mystery, Lovedrop, and others. This is what works for me, and if you apply a little common sense it should work just as well for you. Since we’ve just rolled out the new site, I’m going to be posting these in a series

Part 1: Making the First Call

The first question that even AFCs ask about calling a woman after you get their number is “when should I call?” Some people say wait two days, some people say wait a week, and some people say call her that night. The truth is that there really is no definite answer. You have to decide when to call based on how your interaction went. I personally like to call her after one or two days, unless it’s a weekend and I know she’ll be busy, in which case I’ll wait until Monday. But if it seems like my game wasn’t exactly on par or she seems like the type to have forgotten me after a couple days, I may call her sooner. I’d personally rather appear a little eager than have to go through the “where do I know you from again?” conversation. It’s a pretty good state-killer. But as I said, there is no definite answer. You have to calibrate based on how the set went.

I’ve personally always liked Mehow’s plan for calling your targets.

The first thing I’ll do is send her a “feeler” text sometime in the early afternoon. This is usually something silly or ridiculous like:

- Bunnies are out to get me!

- OMG there’s WATER falling from the SKY!

- Excuse me, do you have any Grey Pupon?

- It’s really a shame we have to get a divorce, your parents are so rich.

- I’m too high maintenance for you

- Stop flirting with me, I’m too busy right now

- You’re sleeping on the couch tonight, young lady

- Under my umbrella ella ella eh eh eh

- I saw a bobble-head in a store today that looked like you

- I think I just saw Jesus and Santa talking outside of a Mc Donald’s

- Why is there no blue food?

- Someone left a rose on my doorstep this morning and I have no idea who it was

- I didn’t want to do this over text, but I can’t keep this from you anymore: I’m pregnant. What are we going to do?!

- I feel so old sometimes. I think I’m going to buy suspenders and take up bingo

You may or not get a response to your text. If she does respond, carry the thread humorously for a couple of texts back and forth, and then stop responding on a high note.

Example:

Prophet: God I feel so old sometimes! I think I’m going to buy suspenders and take up bingo

HB: u should get glasses with strings on them so u dont loose them

Prophet: and then I’ll start telling the same stories all over and over again and call all you kids whippersnappers

HB: Haha and start every story with well back in MY day?

And then I’ll just stop responding. From there, I’ll wait a few hours and then call her later in the evening. This way you are fresh in her mind and because you just went silent on a high note. If your text game was tight, she’ll be wanting more and will be far more likely to pick up when you call.

However, occasionally you will get a slightly needy or extremely interested girl, and she will still send you texts, even after you have stopped responding. Use your judgment here to decide whether she is being creepy/needy or if she just wants a little more you. She’s sending you IOIs with every message she sends you after you stop responding, so if you decide that it’s the latter you can just call her right then if you want. And if she calls YOU, be sure to answer and say something like “Haha, just couldn’t get enough of me, could you?”

If she doesn’t respond to your initial text, DO NOT SEND HER MORE. Wait until the evening and just call her anyway.

If she picks up when you call, immediately use callback humor. Call her a brat, a troublemaker, your attack kitten - whatever nickname you gave her when you were gaming her. And if you aren’t using nicknames in your sets? Get on that man! It builds conspiracy and will make you stand out from the rest of the AFCs that hit on her that night. It doesn’t HAVE to be a nickname necessarily, however. Any form of callback humor will work, as long as you’re fairly certain that she will remember it.

Next week: Part 2 - How to Talk To Her On The Phone

About Prophet

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Men Can ‘laugh women into bed’, Say Psychologists

April 9, 2009 by Lovedrop
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

Men can ‘laugh women into bed’ with GSOH, say psychologists

Men really can laugh women into bed, because a sense of humour makes them seem more intelligent, psychologists have found.

By Kate Devlin, Medical Correspondent
Last Updated: 9:24AM BST 01 Apr 2009

A new study shows that women think that funny men are smarter and more likely to be honest than more dour counterparts.

Although studies have shown that humour is not linked to intelligence, researchers believe that the findings could be the reason why so many lonely heart ads placed by women list GSOH (good sense of humour) as a prerequisite for a partner.

Women have evolved to find intelligence an attractive quality because it suggests that a man will be a good provider for her and her children, the researchers believe.

Kristofor McCarty, from Northumbria University, who led the study, said: “A quick browse of lonely-hearts ads will confirm that women look for a good sense of humour in a potential partner ? our research may explain why this is the case.

“The findings provide evidence that women use humour as an indication of a guy’s intelligence.

“Intelligence is a very attractive quality as a clever man should be more able to provide resources for his offspring.

“But guys be warned: not just any gag will do. We discovered that the humour must be genuinely funny for the man to be judged as more intelligent.”

James Corden, the comedy star of BBC hit Gavin and Stacey, has said that being funny helped him to attract women from his teenage years onwards.

?My weight was never a concern for me. I could always talk to them and make them laugh, so they tended to overlook my physical imperfections,? said Corden, who is currently dating actress Sheridan Smith.

To rate the attractiveness of a sense of humour in the study, 45 heterosexual women were asked to read shorts descriptions of themselves compiled by 20 men, 10 of which were scored as extremely funny and 10 as only slightly funny.

The women were than asked how intelligent and honest they thought that the men were and how likely they would be to go on to develop a friendship or a long-term relationship with them.

The findings, to be presented at the British Psychological Society Annual Conference in Brighton on Wednesday, show that men who used the funniest descriptions of themselves were thought to be significantly more intelligent than those who weren’t as witty.

The women in the study also judged the men who had a good sense of humour as more honest and said that they would be more likely to become friends with them.

Funnier men were also seen as a better catch for a long-term relationship, according to the findings.

While women appear to prefer a men who makes them laugh, the psychologists say that previous studies have shown that the same does not hold true when the sexes are reversed - and men are not more attracted to funny girls.

Excerpted from The Telegraph. Read article here.

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Is Pickup Easier For Girls?

December 24, 2008 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

Here’s my take on the matter: it’s neither harder nor easier, it’s just different.

I thought I would start with an interesting scenario that was posted in a similar thread on the forum. I was going to post this there, but I didn’t want to derail a thread intended for answers from someone else with my own opinion, so I made this thread instead.

Take an average guy and an average girl. Put them both in the same bar which is composed 50/50 of guys and girls of all levels.
Now have each one of them raise their hand and shout “Who wants to have sex with me tonight?”
The girl will have a line. The guy will not.

At first glance, it seems pretty easy to assume that this is true. But upon closer inspection, we can see that this really isn’t the case.

First of all, even if you put all the other issues that women have to deal with in the dating scene (we’ll get to those in a minute) aside and had a women stand in the middle of a bar and shout “Hey, who wants to fuck?” there would be, in reality, surprisingly few takers.

Think about what would go on in the mind of the average man. This is a man who has been socially conditioned to think that women really don’t like sex that much, and that any women who seems to openly want to get laid must be a slut. Factor in that same socially conditioned fear of contracting an STD from such a person and you have already lost a large percentage of potential takers.

Now consider all the insecurities that most men suffer from. How many of those remaining men would be too insecure or paranoid to believe that this woman was REALLY just up for a quick lay and nothing more? How many would be so confused by the idea of a woman shouting to an entire bar that she needs to get laid that just the idea would freak them out too much to consider lining up? How many men would be too afraid to show their interest for fear of it all being a joke and getting rejected?

Suddenly, our list of potential takers comes down to either extremely confident men who understand that sometimes a girl just needs to get laid (of which there are really very few), or guys who will just fuck anything warm and squishy with two legs (and who wants that?). Not really an abundance of choice.

Now admittedly, this is a rather pessimistic view of this scenario, but when looking at things from a general sense, it is still a very realistic one.

Just think about it for a second: the idea of a woman just coming up to us and saying “Hey let’s fuck.” is so outside of most of our realities that it would just freak us out too much. Despite all the bravado they would display if you presented them with the scenario, even most aspiring PUAs would be so thrown off by the fact that it was actually happening that they would miss their chance.

I know this from personal experience.

There were several occasions during my transformation from AFC to PUA that an attractive woman would show obvious interest in me and I would blow it. The idea that an attractive woman was so interested in me that she wanted to have sex with me - without me really having to do anything - was so outside of my reality that I didn’t believe it was happening. My insecurities would take over and I would have no idea what to do and eventually botch the whole thing. And I was an aspiring PUA! I should have known better! How is the average guy going to react?

I have seen this same reaction countless times with students and wingmen in the field, as well as with AFC friends and acquaintances: too much interest will freak them out and they will eject.

These are only the factors that affect that special scenario. The reality of the dating scene is much more complicated. The scenario itself is faulty because it almost never happens. And the reasons why this almost never happens are quite related to why I believe it’s impossible to gauge whether or not picking up is easier for men or women:

They are simply different sets of problems.

We find it easy to say that women have it easier because men are always up for sex, so they should never have any problem getting laid. And on paper that may be true: it would be easier for a girl to get a guy into bed than it would be for the guy if the situation was reversed.

The problem with this is idea is that we’re only looking at the kinds of problems that men have to deal with in the dating world. Women have a whole slew of completely different problems that they have to contend with while they’re out trying to get laid. They may have advantages where we do not in this area, but they are hindered by things which the average man doesn’t even consider.

First, you have the external issues:

There are the insecurities and social conditioning of the men that the average woman wants to sleep with, which I illustrated above.

Then there is this whole concept of a “slut”. If a woman shows too much sexual interest too quickly she could freak the guy out or accidentally make him think that she’s a slut, neither of which are good for her. A reputation as a slut could ruin a woman in a limited population.

You have to consider how such a label can affect how she’s viewed within her peer group. A woman who is considered to be “giving it up too easily” suddenly becomes a threat to the replication value of everyone else in the group. This usually leads to more unfounded (or at least grossly exaggerated) rumors spreading around. I myself have seen absolutely horrid and completely untrue rumors spring up around a woman just because slept with a guy too quickly.

I have seen a woman who has had only two boyfriends in her entire life have one one-night-stand with a guy, and then suddenly there’s rumors floating around the next day that she’s a huge slut and had a foursome with this guy and two of his friends and that she’s got herpes and all sorts of other diseases. Granted, this is a pretty extreme example, but things like this happen more often than the average man tends to think. Anyone who has spent a lot of time with women knows how catty they can be with one another, and some men can be even worse.

A man only needs to be primarily concerned with his social value in the realms of preselection, dominance, access to resources, etc, while a woman has to worry about how forward she is being, whether or not she is dressed too slutty, and whether or not her behavior will be interpreted badly by her peer group. These may or not be harder issues to deal with. It’s hard to say, really. They are simply different sets of problems.

Then you have the internal issues:

A woman has a set of neurological circuitry that can really make it difficult for her to just get out there and get laid. Things like the Anti-Slut Defense, which is a hard-wired mechanism for preventing the loss of perceived replication value, are an example of this, as are the Last Minute Resistance circuits which are hard-wired to prevent a woman from becoming pregnant with a man who may not stick around to take care of her young. But there are also those feelings of guilt or “dirtiness” that are ingrained into some women by they mothers when they are very young, which make it very hard for them to be sexually active without feeling guilty about doing so.

Most of these have been discussed ad nauseum, so I wont go into detail about them here. I just want to note that they are important factors.

Most men don’t have to deal with any of these problems. Our issues in this category fall in the realms of approach anxiety, building attraction, and so on, while theirs fall under ASD, LMR, and the like. I think this is where you can see the differences between both sexes? problems most clearly:

Practically speaking, a reasonably attractive woman will have little trouble approaching a man and making him attracted to her, while for a man to do the same is MUCH harder (as I’m sure most of us are aware). But conversely, a man will internally have no trouble going through with the actual act of having sex, whereas a woman has to overcome many internal hurdles before she can get down to it.

And then there are the men themselves.

Most of us will never know what it’s like to be with a partner who is bigger and stronger than us. Most of us never have to worry about being afraid for our physical safety because of our partners. We know that when trying to choose a sexual partner, a woman has to screen for a man with healthy emotions, and who will protect them should they become endangered. This is because, among other things, we men can be very scary sometimes.

As men, we don’t have to worry about whether the person we just invited into our home is going to rape us. We don’t have to be concerned about whether they will hurt us if we have second thoughts or resist their escalation in any way. For men, the average psycho or stalker that we find ourselves mixed up with is an annoyance and little more. For women, they represent a significant risk to health and safety.

A woman has to take all of these factors into account when playing the field. If she doesn’t deal with these problems, then she can find herself in a world of trouble. Yes, it may be easier for a woman to attract a man, but is it the man she wants? Is she going to be safe around him? Are people going to think she’s a slut for sleeping with him? Is she emotionally comfortable with sleeping with him?

These are all very real problems that a woman has to deal with when courting a man. And it’s because these problems exist that we have invented tactics and methods to make things easier for a woman to sleep with us. We teach men to be understanding, non-judgmental and discreet where necessary, to convey healthy emotions and a genuine connection to our partner, to provide plausible deniability, and quite simply to not be creepy and scary.

If women did not have these problems, then we would not need to teach any of that.

Sure, it may be easier for a woman to attract a man, but when it comes down to actually picking a man up, both men and women suffer from very different sets of obstacles that they must overcome. This is what I mean when I say that you have to look at the bigger picture. There are many things in the act of picking up which either sex will find easy or difficult. But they are too different to measure up against one another. To try to quantify these issues accurately and compare them would be impossible.

As I said before: it’s neither harder nor easier, it’s just different.

In closing I leave you all with a little song to consider: Thank God I’m Pretty, by Emilie Autumn.

Feel free to discuss, ask questions, etc. You all know the drill by now.

Happy sarging,

Prophet

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How To Shake Hands Like An Alpha Male

December 23, 2008 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

3 Comments

Having a firm handshake is extremely important.

Everyone SHOULD know that by now, but some people still don’t have it, so I’ll go over the basics here…

A weak handshake conveys insecurity and (obviously) weakness. Your handshake should always be strong and firm. It should convey confidence and power. Smiling and eye contact is important as well. You should look them straight in the eyes and smile warmly. In the field, I personally like to add a lot of enthusiasm to my handshake, practically thrusting my hand into theirs with a huge grin on my face. It conveys just the right attitude.

Knowing when to let go is important as well. You should know to let go the moment the other person starts to loosen their hand, or whenever you feel you’ve held hands long enough. Whichever comes first. Remember: you should be always leading, even in a handshake.

This doesn’t just apply to men you meet, either. A woman expects a firm handshake from a confident alpha male.

Don’t believe me? Make your opener for this week “Hey guys, do you find a strong handshake attractive? Or does it matter?” See what kind of responses you get.

You don’t want to give them the limp fish, but you don’t want to crush their hand either, so be careful. The key words here are strong and firm. A handshake conveys a tremendous amount of information about your personality, so practice with your wing-men or friends until you feel you’ve got it right.

Now that’s the stuff everyone should know already. Here’s the stuff that most people don’t:

Most guys who are going to try to AMOG you are going to squeeze your hand rather hard. The more they feel threatened, the harder they will squeeze to show you that they mean business. If you’re like me, and wear a lot of rings, someone squeezing your hand like that can fucking hurt.

Luckily, you can get by this by sticking your index finger straight out when you take the guys hand, as if you’re pointing at him (Lovedrop taught me this, by the way). By doing this, your hand will naturally grip his farther up, so when he squeezes it, he will be squeezing your HAND, and not your fingers or knuckles. He can squeeze as hard as he wants, and he’s not going to hurt you. And you can still squeeze his hand firmly without any problem.

The other thing you can do is turn your hands so that yours is on top of his. According to several body language texts that I’ve read over the years, the person with their hand on top during a handshake is considered to be the more dominant one. The perfect way to do this is to turn your hand the moment you grip his. Do this firmly and quickly (but not too fast!), so that you will catch him off guard, as he might try to resist. If you do firmly twist your hands before he can react, you can lock yours over top of his, and even if he tries to turn it back, you will have the advantage and can let go before he can even try to overpower you.

Sounds like a lot of work right?

Well, it takes a hell of a lot more to explain than it does to just do it. Just point and twist, and be strong and firm. It’s as simple as that. Try it out with your friends or wing-men, and you’ll see how easy it is. Within a day or two, you’ll never shake hands the same way again.

Happy sarging,

Prophet

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How To Talk To Girls

December 8, 2008 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

A little while ago, a student asked me for tips on how to make idle conversation with women. My response, as you can see below, somehow became a rather lengthy explanation of my understanding of the art of conversation.

I figured you guys might enjoy it, so here it is!

———

There is an ongoing statement in the seduction community that says “NEVER ASK QUESTIONS”. The idea is that when we are picking up a woman, we must avoid falling back into that “interview mode” that AFCs usually fall into when they want to keep a conversation going. These are those standard interview-like questions that every chode and his mother will ask a girl over and over again throughout her life. “Where are you from?” “What do you do?” “Where did you go to school?” How many times has the average HB heard those questions? Hundreds? Thousands?

These are the kinds of questions that you need to train yourself to avoid asking.

Unfortunately, people tend to take the above statement a little too literally and really NEVER ask any questions.

This is not what a calibrated PUA does.

The proper way to do this is to reframe those interview-style questions into statements, such as stating “You seem like and East Coast girl.” or something like that instead of just asking where she’s from. You’ll either be right or wrong, but the girl will still give you an answer regardless. From there, you can start to ask follow-up questions if you want to. So if the girl tells you that she’s really from X, you can say “Oh X! That’s groovy. What do they have for like, landmarks and touristy stuff there?” Or whatever information about where she’s from that you GENUINELY want to know. Or if you know something about the place: “Oh X! That’s groovey. I take it you’ve been to the ___ then? It’s actually on my list of things to visit during my travels.” So you ask a follow-up question AFTER you have made a statement and got the girl to invest in an interaction.

This is, of course, a GENERAL GUIDELINE, but it gives you an idea of how things tend to flow. It is not a strict rule, and there will be moments where you need to ask a direct question. This is just an example of what you might want to do instead of just asking “where are you from?”

Books like How to Win Friends and Influence People tell you to listen and let other people talk and ask follow-up questions and talk about details and such. This is good advice if you do it in small amounts, but as a PUA you also have to make sure that you are leading the conversation.

When you find out where she’s from, the girl might tell you a story or talk about something to do with where she’s from, or you can just continue to lead the conversation by going off into a story about how you LOVE checking out any interesting landmarks or tourist attractions whenever you travel or whatever. And then maybe you’ll tell a story about something that happened when you were trying to take a picture of something but were interrupted by a humorous incident. And then maybe she’ll tell you about how she loves photography, and you can ask a question or two about that, and so on and so on.

This is how natural conversation flows. You both talk back and forth and jump from one topic to another fluidly. The trick is to make sure that you are leading the conversation so that she doesn’t go off into some huge rant about some drama with her ex or her girlfriends, or he boss, etc, etc. Women have a tendency to just go onto the same old boring topics that they talk about with everybody. If you let this happen, she will eventually get bored of the conversation and unconsciously blame you for it, even though she was the one who steered the conversation in that direction in the first place! It’s not her fault though, she was expecting you to lead the conversation, and you DIDN’T. As a result, you lost value in her eyes. You need to make sure that you are steering the conversation to where you want it to go, but not necessarily dominate it (as most aspiring PUAs try to do). As you move into the comfort phase of the courtship, you should both be contributing to the conversation almost equally.

Conversation is about building a connection, and in order to do that you need to talk about things that actually BUILD CONNECTION. Make sure you avoid useless topics of idle conversation.

So what do you talk about then?

Conversation topics can usually be grouped into a couple of categories:

Things that are happening in the world - politics, movies, music, things on the news, etc
Things that are happening to people you know - gossip, drama, funny stories about friends, etc
Things that are happening to you - what you are doing, where you are going, adventures or interesting activities that you tend to get up to
Things that you love or hate. - your hobbies, your pet peeves, your favourite books, movies, music, friends, enemies, etc

I tend to avoid the first two categories because they are really just forms of idle small talk. Have you ever found yourself stuff in a conversation with someone that you really aren’t interested in talking to? Those are the times when the first two categories usually come out. You talk about movies or music or politics or maybe even gossip if you know some of the same people. These conversations go nowhere and don’t do anything but fill in awkward silence.

The second two categories are things that should be of interest to your partner. These are the kinds of things that you both should be talking about. These are the topics that convey who you are!

I find that when I’m building a connection like this, I just talk about anything that is important to me. I’ll talk about my writing and how much it means to me to be able to make another person experience a powerful emotion just by reading the words that I write down on a page. I’ll talk about how much I love to get my nails done at a salon because I love being pampered. I’ll talk about the necklace that I wear that sort of looks like the symbol for medicine but is really a powerful spiritual sigil and how it is connected with why I style my hair into large red devil horns. I’ll talk about the human pineal gland and how that is of particular interest to my spirituality and how it connects to both my writing AND my necklace and devil horns. I’ll talk about how I used to be an amazing artist and how I lost my skills when I got into computer graphics, but how that allowed me to pay my own way through university by building websites for companies. I’ll talk about the things I want to do with my life and how I’m actively working towards those goals. I’ll talk about how much I love to travel and how I can’t figure out if my next big trip will be a tour through Europe, or the Pyramids in Egypt. I’ll talk about how I got my favourite record by my favourite musical artist signed by him in person and how it trips me out that it’s 20 years older than I am and how I love to just chill with my friends and listen to classic rock on the original vinyl records.

See what I wrote there? That took less than five minutes to write all those possible conversation topics off of the top of my head. Notice how they are all about the things that I love and/or things that I am currently doing? Notice how each one conveys different aspects of my personality? Think about how much you just learned about who I am and what I’m all about just by reading what I wrote there!

Also notice that for every one of these topics there is plenty of room for you to talk about how any of those topics correspond to her. You need to make sure that you are also talking about things that will allow you to really get to know who she is and what she is all about. You can talk about her artistic talents or what she does to express herself creatively. You can talk about the places she has travelled to or wants to travel to. You can talk about her hopes and dreams and plans. The possibilities are endless.

Notice something else here as well: I’m not just talking about things I like, I’m talking about things that mean something to me.

For instance, if I were to just talk about how much I love classic cars, it would bore the shit out of the average girl. But if I were to talk about how the first car I ever bought (a 1975 Chevy Monte Carlo) was actually my DREAM CAR, and how my mom always drove these old 70’s Monte Carlos when I was a kid, so I practically grew up in those cars and it was always my dream to own one of my own? That can be a very compelling story.

See the difference?

Once again: the purpose of conversation is to create a connection. Talking about the kinds of things I have mentioned above will give you both the feeling that you really KNOW each other. You are telling each other emotionally compelling things about yourselves. And that’s what creating a connection is.

About Prophet

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Taking Advice From Women

January 3, 2008 by Prophet
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

http://www.venusianarts.com/forum/showthread.php?t=7014

We have an awesome on-going thread in our Best Of Section of the forum with a woman answering questions about Pick-Up from her perspective. It’s a great thread and there’s some awesome advice in it. You can find it here:

It has always been a standard sort of thinking by many aspiring PUAs to assume that you should never take the advice of a woman because what they say they want and what they really want are two different things. While this is true in many cases, it should not be taken as the final word on the matter.

You can take advice from women, just be sure to take it with a grain of salt. Don’t necessarily take every single word literally. Instead, try to understand why a women is saying a particular thing, as that can sometimes tell you more than the advice itself. You would even be surprised by how much you can learn just by watching your female friends deal with guys and applying what you see to what you know about female psychology. I always try to keep close female friends who I would never try to seduce, and I always try to encourage other PUAs to do the same. Close female friends who you are not sexually interested in are great for social proof as pivots, can help you be more comfortable being around women without experiencing sexual tension, or even just to make sure you have some women somewhere in your life at all times. But more importantly, you can learn a ton from them.

For instance, one of my good friends just broke up with her boyfriend. Within the first week of her being single, she received close to a hundred texts, phone calls, emails, and myspace/facebook messages from different AFC guys that she knows (which shows you the kind of quality of women I like to keep in my social circles). What I found interesting is that all of them were basically saying the same thing: “Hey, I heard you and XXXXX just broke up. If you want to get together and have a coffee and talk about it or something, I’m here for you.” Now, she’s not naive, she knows that it’s never just coffee, and she’s always telling me about these guys who hit on her in creepy/shady/AFC ways and I make sure to file every story in my brain under What Not To Do.

The amount of information I have acquired about women and how AFC guys act just by watching interactions between guys and my female friends is staggering. It quite possibly would have taken me years to learn so much without an open and semi-honest female brain to quiz and observe every now and then. I encourage all of you to strive to do the same.

Similarly, there are also many girls out there that are very much aware of how their minds work.

I was with another one of my friends on New Year’s and we were talking about an issue she had with a certain guy and - honest to god - she said to me “I don’t necessarily ‘like him’, he’s not even hot, but he’s just so cocky and confident and it’s…attractive.”

Does that ring any bells to anyone?

Now, a girl like that can sometimes be hard to find, but they are out there. Women are not as blind to what’s happening as some PUAs like to think. Every now and then you’ll get some obstacle with attitude who will say things like “Are you doing that just so you can touch her?” or “Did you do that on purpose just so we would ___”. It happens, and yet the set still continues and you still close. Why? Because some women get it (and just because they get what’s happening doesn’t mean that they don’t want it to happen). And having a woman understands how these things work as a wing-girl can open more doors than you would believe.

In summation:
- Always listen to what women have to say about men, but be sure to take it with a grain of salt and learn to read between the lines.
- Watch how AFCs interact with your female friends and how your female friends react in response and learn from it.
- Keep an eye out for that rare “aware” girl. They are learning goldmines.

Listen, learn, and always keep an open mind.

Happy sarging everyone!

Prophet

About Prophet

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Approach Anxiety by Matador

May 28, 2007 by Matador
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

4 Comments

I have read many references to this topic. It occurs to me that many people think that there is something wrong with them for having approach anxiety and are looking for ways to ?get rid of it.?

WHAT IS APPROACH ANXIETY?

Approach anxiety is the hard-wired, natural emotional circuit that fires and causes you to experience discomfort at the thought of approaching a set.

WHY DO I FEEL APPROACH ANXIETY?

Approach anxiety stems from two sources of fear that have been hard-wired through evolution.

FEAR#1: Fear of being retaliated against by other males.

FEAR#2: Fear of being ostracized by the remaining available female population.

WHERE DID IT COME FROM?

We have descended from a tribal culture. We still live in a tribal culture, although not one that easily identifiable compared to what we think a tribe is (i.e. African Tribes).

Take the movie Braveheart for example. Think of the William Wallace?s tribe or clan and that was how life used to be for our ancestors. A lot of our emotions have been developed and refined for survival in that environment. However, our environment has changed far too rapidly and our emotional circuitry has not adapted fast enough.

In a tribal culture of let?s say 100 people, roughly half would be male and half would be female. So you have 50 viable females to choose from. From that 50, half of those would be too old to align with, so now you are down to 25. Out of those 25, half would be already taken by another man, so now you are down to approximately 12.

In this environment, it is very easy to step up to the wrong girl?a girl who is already spoken for by another man. Times were brutal back then. It was a real possibility that if you stepped to the wrong girl, that man would come by with his friends and kill with a rock. That?s were fear number 1 comes into play. Fear of being retaliated against by other males. Remember, there are a lot of blood lines that are not here with us today that didn?t have the precise emotional circuitry that you have. There emotional circuitry proved insufficient to govern their behavior for optimal survival purposes. To put it into context, a lot the guys who didn?t pay respect to this legitimate danger back then died out and their descendants with them. You are looking at a biased population.

Now, remember from the paragraph above, you have 12 healthy, viable females to choose from now. If you step to on of those 12 and she rejects you?word will spread of that rejection and pretty soon, the other 11 will not want to align with as well. You can see this trend in some small college communities?have you ever gotten player/scumbag reputation and all of a sudden none of the other girls will want to go out with you. If the cause of the rejection was bad enough, you might have to leave your tribe to another to find a woman that will align with you. This is the cause for fear number 2: Fear of being ostracized by the remaining available female population.

HOW DO I GET RID OF IT?

Now, to try to accomplish this is to say something along the lines of, ?how do I not scan a girls breast, hair, body, and the rest of her health indicators when she walks in the room.? The answer is you can?t. You will do so as an automatic reflex. The universe behaves has it should gentlemen. God only knows where we were given all the false stories and references points that leave us wallowing in a sea of confusion and frustration at the contradiction between reality and idealistic fantasies. You approach anxiety will always be there. It is a hardwired response. Try not to think in terms of getting rid of it, but understand it, and de-fang it.

Logically, in the watering holes and public gatherings that we TYPICALLY roll in, is a jealous boyfriend going to kill you with his friends if you open properly?I have never had someone try to kill me with his friends for opening a girl?I pulled a girl right out of her boyfriends arms last week in south beach and I did it without hitch?it is not something to brag about either?anyone, can do it with the right approach. The fear should be inoculated for our CURRENT ENVIRONMENT. It does not apply.

QUICK NOTE: There are some environments that are very tribal?there are some cultures that are very primitive?don?t try trust test with a bunch of natives of one of those Hawaiian islands where the blood line is still pure and expect not to get some shit.

Next, in the watering holes and public gatherings that we TYPICALLY roll in, is a target in a set, that didn?t go well, going to inform the entire city, state, or country that you live in of your game and how bad it is? Is she going to put up a website call, www.bobsgamesucks.com? Hell no, she will have forgotten what you look by the end of the next day and life goes on.

In the sea of people that big cities provide, this fear does not apply and should be logically neutralized.

QUICK NOTE: In closed communities, such as small colleges or small towns where word spreads. If you get a reputation as a guy who is a player, who impregnated a girl and left, who beats girls, or does anything that would red flag a girl?s S&R value judging circuit, then they will spread the word about you and you will have to leave and game somewhere else.

Our emotional and logical parts of our brain are in constant conflict. I am not suggesting that by logically knowing why you are feeling AA that it should go away?that would be unnatural. I am however suggesting arming yourself with the logic of the situation so that you can better control it, rather than, it control you and ruin so many possibilities in the making.

Even TOP PUAs feel it. Imagine a Master Instructor?s approach anxiety on bootcamp night?not only do we have to deal with our own?we have performance anxiety on top of that?we have to hug, kiss, number-close, and pull girls for an audience in a totally unscripted and unpredictable environment.

How do I deal with it? I feel it and immediately identify it. Next, I logically deal with it and dissect it. Then I logically override what I am feeling by crudely saying, ?FUCK IT?I?M GOING IN? and then DO IT. I?ve done this some many times at this point, I am kind of desensitized to it, but it is always still there?if we could attach ourselves to heart rates monitors, you would see a little bleep here and there?the point it, at a TOP PUA level, it doesn?t CONTROL us?we CONTROL it!

One final note. ALCOHOL is not a solution for AA. You can drink to be social, unwind, and have fun with the boys when gaming, but drinking should not be a tool to combat AA. In fact, drinking more than a few drinks impairs my game. If I am being filmed or I have some audience, I am in top form with one beer maximum if any.

I once had a bootcamp student in Los Angeles, and I kid you not, had eight shots of tequila before he opened one single set. I felt really bad for him. His approach anxiety was BAD?he looked like he was really in pain. I?ve had grown men start crying when I try to push them to open (some were ex-military). AA is very real and no joke and if you don?t understand it, de-fang it, and control it?it can SEVERERLY lower the quality of your life by destroying so many possibilities. I think back to all those years, I was clueless about game and girls and all the potential LOVES I?ve lost?all the popular girls in high school that I could?ve gotten?oh well, fuck it?going to plow forward! To briefly reference my ?Excuse Master? post?I believe this is many times the true culprit behind all those fantastic rationalizations we have to not go into a set or not call a girl the next day.

I am not above my humanity either?I feel it same as you. I am not always as strong as I would like to be and am imperfect in many ways?what I strive for is a higher level of awareness and execution of my elaborate plans for this life with the ultimate goal of what I perceive to be happiness.

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Video: Mystery on the 3-Second Rule & 3-Minute Rule

May 1, 2007 by Mystery
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

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Video: Mystery of Social Proof

May 1, 2007 by Mystery
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

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Video: Live footage of Mystery In-Field

March 10, 2007 by Mystery
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips

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Mystery featured in “The Game” by Neil Strauss

September 6, 2005 by Blitz
Filed under Dating Advice and Tips, News & Events